~ Expecting Our Rainbow Babies ~ May chat - Page 3 - Mothering Forums

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#61 of 97 Old 06-01-2014, 09:00 PM
 
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Ugh I don't like this new system it has taken me what feels like forever to somewhat figure it out.lol... RRMoM I am so sorry for your loss,keep your head up,god has a plan for you. Prayers

21 22
(July 2011)
(March 18,2014) (5 Weeks 5 Days)
Expecting #2 December 23,2014
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#62 of 97 Old 06-02-2014, 05:26 AM - Thread Starter
 
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I am so sorry, RRMum. You have been through so much. I can't even imagine what you are going through right now.

I do want to echo Liladancing in encouraging you to tell whoever you want to tell--particularly family members who you feel might be supportive. I know you said before that you might regret not telling people about the pregnancy in case anything did happen. Having been in both situations myself (losing a pregnancy both before and after telling people about the pregnancy), I have found that it was easier for me to lose a pregnancy that no one knew about because then I could tell only those who I wanted to about the pregnancy and subsequent loss without having to feel like I was letting anyone down. I have broken the taboo of talking about miscarriages, and if anyone asks why I am sad or why I have been sick (missed work) lately, I will often tell them. I am less likely to tell men, but I have told many of my female coworkers and most of my friends and family, and most people are understanding. Many of the women tell me that they too have experienced miscarriages. Anyway, I am not trying to tell you what to do, but I don't want you to be afraid to share your story with those with whom you feel comfortable. You don't have to give details, but it can be very therapeutic.

I'm glad you are going to start therapy soon. You have a lot of loss to work through. Take care!

Now mom to a boy born January 2010. 
Cautiously expecting Dec 2014!

 12/08 (6 weeks),  1/13 (11 weeks), &  12/13 (9.5 weeks)
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#63 of 97 Old 06-02-2014, 05:30 AM - Thread Starter
 
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I don't know why I'm having such trouble with this new format. I have used vbulletin in the past and always liked it. In any case, I was thinking that since this thread wasn't overly busy, I might just continue using it for June too. Any objections?
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Now mom to a boy born January 2010. 
Cautiously expecting Dec 2014!

 12/08 (6 weeks),  1/13 (11 weeks), &  12/13 (9.5 weeks)
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#64 of 97 Old 06-03-2014, 09:13 PM
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I too struggle with using the new format. I even thought of not using the forums anymore, but it is so nice to come and talk here about a still secret pregnancy.

I had my second U/S today, the doctor timed me at 9 weeks 2 days (it keeps changing). We saw what looked a lot more like a baby, with a body and head and arm. The HB was 182 per minutes. DH and I are still in disbelief, after so many years of wanting it it feels like "Why now? How did it even happen?".

We told two of our very dear friends and they were so surprised, yet very excited. I think no one saw this coming anymore after ten years.

I am not feeling so nauseous today, all last week was horrible. Everytime I gagged and heaved I thought "this is all worth it".
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#65 of 97 Old 06-04-2014, 05:27 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Yay! I'm glad things are still looking good for you, sweetface! I'm glad you are feeling better this week. I am too, but I still feel nauseated at times. It's been a while since my u/s and heartbeat check, so of course I'm worried that the situation may have changed, but the HR was 180 at 10w5d. The doctor said that it was high, but not unusual for so early on, so I'm glad to see yours is in the same range.

Now mom to a boy born January 2010. 
Cautiously expecting Dec 2014!

 12/08 (6 weeks),  1/13 (11 weeks), &  12/13 (9.5 weeks)
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#66 of 97 Old 06-04-2014, 09:17 AM
 
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I turned 15 weeks yesterday, and my bloat is going down some and now my overall belly is actually smaller than it was a few weeks ago, although my uterus itself is definitely growing growing growing. I had the "old moms'" blood work done and should be hearing back any day, but I just texted her to ask if we had results yet, and b/c of the timing of when the draw was (the Friday before Memorial Day), there's a chance they might not be able to use that sample. But the company rep told them to send it in anyway and see what the lab said, and I'm thinking (hoping?) that if it was an unusable sample, they would have heard something before now, and that they're just processing it like normal. Hoping to hear something this week in any case.

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#67 of 97 Old 06-04-2014, 09:32 AM
 
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I too am having a hard time with the new format. I can't get my ticker to change. I can't change my sign off at all. It won't save it it says it is too big. But I think it is counting the html. Granted I do most everything on my phone. So maybe that makes a difference. I am almost 7 weeks now. Will be on Thursday.
sweetfaceI am glad things are going well for you. You deserve it after 10 years!

Madara rest in peace9/24/2013 
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#68 of 97 Old 06-05-2014, 09:02 AM
 
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Hi All - Thanks NSMomtobe, your thoughts are helpful, and I'm hopeful for your next check in with baby!

I read the book "Silent Sorrow" about pregnancy loss and found it really helpful. And I am about to pick up "Wild Solace" which was recommended by a friend who recently lost her father.

I ended up writing a letter about this recent loss and all the losses, for the important women in my life. It was a great strategy, because I could share my feelings, think about what I was really feeling (not just what i am supposed to be feeling), and even offer it to my DH so he can understand my point of view. I sent it via email and it has helped me feel a little more willing to get out and be social, there are no secrets with the people who love me and my family. We are now thinking about a way to commemorate all four losses and celebrate our family of three. I'd like to do something fleeting/ephemeral and in nature. Any ideas? I've thought of releasing Chinese hot air balloon type lanterns or floating flower wreaths with candles down a river, but I am worried about safety issues. I don't want to set me local forest of fire! Anyone found a way to commemorate their previous losses? I think I was avoiding doing this thinking that if I had another child grieving would be a moot point, but now I think the grief would always be there and need to be felt even if we did have a successful pregnancy.

Sweetface - good news! I'm glad to hear it.

And yeah - the news system sort or sucks - I had the hardest time relocating this group.
Love and light to you all and your little rainbows!

Aug 2009;  DS1 Sep 2010; Dec 2012; Dec 2013; May 2014
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#69 of 97 Old 06-05-2014, 10:37 AM - Thread Starter
 
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I'm really having a hard time with the format. Cannot edit the first post without removing a number of graphics. I hope to have time to do that this weekend. I was able to update my ticker!

As for commemorating loss, I have a necklace, which I keep meaning to get DH to take a picture of for me so I can post it in a thread here. I had a previous necklace (pictured as my avatar) which contained the dates and birthstones of my first 2. After my 3rd loss, I switched to a floating(?) locket, which is glass and I can add whatever I want to it. I have 3 large birth stones to represent my loss dates and 3 small birth stones to represent the due dates. There is also a butterfly charm for my butterfly babies, and the letter D to represent my son. I meant to have his birth stone too, but the one I ordered for him was too big and the wrong colour, so I returned it. When the new baby is born, I will order another initial and birthstones for my living babies to add as well.

I also plan to do something on Dec 20th (if I'm not in labour that day) to remember the 2 I lost on that date. It will probably be to light a candle or something. I know people do balloon releases, but I think it is bad for the environment, and I would also worry about safety issues with fire being released.

Now mom to a boy born January 2010. 
Cautiously expecting Dec 2014!

 12/08 (6 weeks),  1/13 (11 weeks), &  12/13 (9.5 weeks)
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#70 of 97 Old 06-07-2014, 09:01 AM
 
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I couldn't find the hb last night or trying twice this morning. Probably over two hours all together. I know the baby is gone. I have to wait until Monday to call the doctor's office to get in for a confirmation u/s. I'll let you all know any updates.

Wife to DH for 17 years, Mom to 4 girls (15, 13, 12 and 9 months), 2 boys (11, 7), and (13 wk mc 4/10/11), (13 week mc 12/12/11). (11 wk mc 6/25/14)
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#71 of 97 Old 06-07-2014, 12:00 PM
 
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M Annathat is horrible news. I am sorry. How far along are you? If it is an emergency can't you call the on call doc for the weekend or go into the e.r.?

Madara rest in peace9/24/2013 
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#72 of 97 Old 06-07-2014, 02:46 PM
 
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I would have been 10 weeks 4 days today. There's nothing they'll do in the ER because I'm not bleeding or cramping. All of my miscarriages have been missed ones though and took weeks for me to start bleeding. Even if they sent me for an u/s they won't give me the results. I might as well wait for Monday.

Wife to DH for 17 years, Mom to 4 girls (15, 13, 12 and 9 months), 2 boys (11, 7), and (13 wk mc 4/10/11), (13 week mc 12/12/11). (11 wk mc 6/25/14)
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#73 of 97 Old 06-07-2014, 05:09 PM
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So sorry M Anna, this sounds so terrifying and tragic.
I hope you figure out what is going on for sure soon.
Not knowing and waiting around are the worst.
I hope you can be kind with yourself.
Best to you.
SF.
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#74 of 97 Old 06-09-2014, 08:23 AM - Thread Starter
 
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M Anna, I hope you are able to get answers today. I know it is a horrible place to be. I know it's hard when you know in your heart that a pregnancy is over but of course you need the confirmation and when I am in that position, I do not like to be given false hope.

But I do have to ask whether you heard the heartbeat earlier in this pregnancy, because I know 10 weeks is considered earlier to hear a heartbeat. Doctors here usually refuse to try before 12 weeks.

Now mom to a boy born January 2010. 
Cautiously expecting Dec 2014!

 12/08 (6 weeks),  1/13 (11 weeks), &  12/13 (9.5 weeks)
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#75 of 97 Old 06-09-2014, 01:51 PM
 
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MAnna, I'm so sorry to hear you are having to wait. It's the worst! I hope you got either happy news or the information you needed to know what is happening and how to move forward. I know the feeling when you just know something is wrong and you know the doctors can do nothing. Hugs.

Aug 2009;  DS1 Sep 2010; Dec 2012; Dec 2013; May 2014
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#76 of 97 Old 06-09-2014, 05:11 PM
 
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Sorry I'm late updating. I got in this afternoon for an ultrasound and to see the doctor. The baby had no heartbeat, as I had known. He died at 10 weeks, 6 days, probably on Friday (which put my due date back to December 27th where I had originally had it - not that it matters much now). There was nothing obviously wrong. He probably died from a blood clot, which is what we're thinking happened to the other little ones I lost. I'm waiting to deliver on my own which can take a few weeks. I need to see the doc once a week. At the end of three weeks if I have not yet delivered, I'll go in the hospital for a cytotec induction.

Wife to DH for 17 years, Mom to 4 girls (15, 13, 12 and 9 months), 2 boys (11, 7), and (13 wk mc 4/10/11), (13 week mc 12/12/11). (11 wk mc 6/25/14)
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#77 of 97 Old 06-09-2014, 05:39 PM
 
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M Anna - I'm so sorry for your loss.

Aug 2009;  DS1 Sep 2010; Dec 2012; Dec 2013; May 2014
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#78 of 97 Old 06-09-2014, 06:13 PM - Thread Starter
 
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M Anna, I am sorry for your loss. You mentioned in the other thread that you are taking baby aspirin, so I'm sorry (and scared) to hear that it didn't help prevent a blood clot. I hope your body takes care of the pregnancy quickly and easily.

Now mom to a boy born January 2010. 
Cautiously expecting Dec 2014!

 12/08 (6 weeks),  1/13 (11 weeks), &  12/13 (9.5 weeks)
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#79 of 97 Old 06-09-2014, 07:22 PM
 
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Don't let the clot/baby aspirin thing worry you. I took baby aspirin through the pregnancy with my rainbow baby and she is here and well. I don't know for a fact that this was a blood clot, it just looks like it. We're all individual and for some, aspirin is enough and for others they need heparin and for still others, nothing is enough. Anyway, don't worry overmuch about what happened to me - it doesn't mean it will happen to you or anyone else.

Wishing you all a calm and healthy rest of your pregnancies.

Wife to DH for 17 years, Mom to 4 girls (15, 13, 12 and 9 months), 2 boys (11, 7), and (13 wk mc 4/10/11), (13 week mc 12/12/11). (11 wk mc 6/25/14)
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#80 of 97 Old 06-09-2014, 08:02 PM
 
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M anna so sorry for your loss. I really hope things in the next few weeks go smoothly for you. It is just too bad your were right all along about your baby being gone. So sorry.
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#81 of 97 Old 06-09-2014, 08:23 PM
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M Anna, I am very sorry.
I send you healing vibrations, I hope the future will be brighter for you.
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#82 of 97 Old 06-10-2014, 06:08 AM
 
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@M Anna @manna - I hope you see this. I'm so sorry for your loss. I know you're tend to lean toward a clotting cause for your losses and you may be right. Have you done all the clotting factor tests? There are a lot of them and I'm sure you qualify to get all the testing done with 3 losses. But, I'd like to propose an alternate theory.


I wonder if you don't have a male HY antigen problem. With your history it certainly seems possible. http://www.ivf1.com/boys-cause-miscarriage/ It happens when the mom's body gets sensitized to the Y chromosome and treats it like an invader. It would seem like your sons may have sensitized your body and now your body will reject all male children as a foreign body. Especially, if this one is a boy, to me, it's a serious possibility.


I know you would want to respect the sanctity of the baby's body, but you could have all the genetic testing done on the placenta easily enough. Talk to you doc about sending the placenta to pathology.


to you. I hope you find answers.

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Mom to AJ 4/07 and Genevieve 5/09

And then: I'm really, really tired of making angels.

But wait, could it really be true?


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#83 of 97 Old 06-10-2014, 03:47 PM
 
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I'm so sorry, Anna.

Andrea , child of God, wife of Tim , mama of L, B, J, J

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#84 of 97 Old 06-10-2014, 05:44 PM
 
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M Anna I am so sorry for your loss. Prayers for you and your family!!!





I am sorry I haven't been on here much lately,I've been off in my own little world. Few new things going on in my life I'd love to share since I haven't announced the pregnancy yet. I've signed up for some prenatal classes which start next month. I'm excited about them because I did not get to do them with my first pregnancy as I was a workaholic.I've started making a homemade baby book. This will be my last pregnancy so I am wanting to make it as special as possible. I've started saving up because I really want a 3D/4D ultrasound with this pregnancy. My next doctors appointment is in 10 days. We have decided to announce the pregnancy in 5 days since I made 12 weeks today. At 11 weeks 5 days we finally heard the heartbeat for the first time via home doppler. Well thats all I can think of to share right now. Sorry about the book. How is everyone else doing at this point?

21 22
(July 2011)
(March 18,2014) (5 Weeks 5 Days)
Expecting #2 December 23,2014
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#85 of 97 Old 06-16-2014, 10:51 AM
 
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I had some cramping starting at 6 am. When I went back to sleep and woke up at 7:35 it was still there. It is 10:43 now and it is starting to diminish. I am hoping it goes away. It is concerning me and I keep praying for me baby. Plus I had dreams I was at my daughters grave last night. I just talked to the advice nurse though in the middle of this post. She said the cramping can be pretty normal. Hopefully nothing bad will happen.

Madara rest in peace9/24/2013 
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#86 of 97 Old 06-16-2014, 01:40 PM
 
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With all my pregnancies I had cramping in the early weeks. Would expect to see blood every time I went to the bathroom. Only time I bled was with my 2 mc's.

If it helps, the cramping was much more severe with the mc's.

Hang in there!
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#87 of 97 Old 06-17-2014, 10:04 AM
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liladancing - it seems like if there is no blood and only cramping it is probably just your uterus growing. I realized last night while looking down at myself that my belly has grown a lot in the last week. I have felt little cramps in the past few weeks (I am at 11 weeks and 2 days) and I am sure the cramps would have felt a lot worse if I had been worried about them.

The best to you and your baby!
SF
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#88 of 97 Old 06-18-2014, 01:38 PM
 
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I think all is well. Now the cramping is a lot less than that day. Just some slight twinges here and there. I am having my next appointment at 2nd ultrasound on Friday of next week so there's that. I can't wait for it. My husband is taking the day off too to go. So it should be a good day.

Madara rest in peace9/24/2013 
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#89 of 97 Old 06-23-2014, 10:23 AM
 
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I was just coming to check in and say hello to everyone. My baby is 7 months now!

M Anna I am so sorry for your loss. I am thinking of you.
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#90 of 97 Old 06-23-2014, 11:29 AM
 
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That's so great, beans!

Andrea , child of God, wife of Tim , mama of L, B, J, J

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