Pg after mc & scared to death - Mothering Forums

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#1 of 10 Old 07-28-2005, 10:18 PM - Thread Starter
 
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I keep thinking that I am fooling myself. I should be about 7 weeks pg now, but can't bring myself to see the MW to confirm. My husband and a few family members know, but I feel like if I tell anyone I will miscarry again and feel ashamed - like I've failed.

I don't feel pregnant either. Last time I felt pg right away and then the some of the symptoms went away after a couple weeks. This time I felt sore breasts for a day or two a few weeks ago, but don't have any morning sickness or anything. I know that doesn't necessarily mean I'm not pg or am going to mc, but it worries me nonetheless.

I should be happy right now, but I can't get over the fear of losing this baby. I want to start connecting with this baby but just can't convince myself that it's going to last. I took a test two weeks ago that was neg after having missed my period, and then again last week that was positive (and again Wed because I am so paranoid. It was pos too.) I was so sure I wasn't preg. Something in my gut told me to do it again, but I still felt so doubtful (still do.) Last pg I never had a pos test - but maybe it would've been if I had taken it sooner???

Anyone else experience pregnancies without morning sickness? Ever after mc? Anyone ever take a test that was pos, not believe it was true, take another test later that turned out to be neg?

Thanks for listening to my worries.

Sarah
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#2 of 10 Old 07-29-2005, 12:48 AM
 
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Oh Sarah, I am so with you right now. I have been there. I got preg. the first time and had a m/c at 6 weeks. My second preg. I was so terrified. I could barely breathe it seemed. And then everyone would say that if I stressed it woul djeapordize the baby. It is such a hard time. I also didn't feel connected, wouldn't let myself as if somehow that would save me if the worst happened. Truth is, it wouldn't make much difference, it would still hurt. What I did was talk to those who loved me and those who understood. My midwives were invaluable to me because they cared about emotions too. I could vent and cry and get reassurances. I even opted for seeing the heartbeat twice to try and calm me. It did help but i would never tell someone to do or not do that.
I did carry to term, past two weeks term actually, and I have an amazing lil boy named Bliss. I am also gateful every day of my life.
I don't know that there is anything that will make it easier except time but I wanted to be the first to tell you I hear you, I understand, I am here, and you are not alone.
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#3 of 10 Old 07-29-2005, 03:15 AM
 
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Sarah, my heart and prayers go out to you!!

You are not alone....Many have been where you are right now. I have lost two children...the first at 14wks (2001) and my son at 39wks (2002). There is no pain like the pain of losing a child....It doesn't matter if the loss is at 4wks or 40wks. Just know that God will be with you through it all, no matter what!!.... He will carry you through this pregnancy. Celebrate each and every moment with your baby, for none of us know how many days we have on this earth...Be Strong & Courageous and do not be afraid. My story has a happy ending--in Sept of 2004 I gave birth to a healthy baby boy named Isaiah (Means God saves)!!

May God Bless You and your Family!

Desiree
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#4 of 10 Old 08-03-2005, 10:11 AM
 
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((Sarah))

My loss was at 16wks -first pregnancy.
Then I saw a BFP within a month, and was as terrified as you might imagine. But the glimmer of hope was enough to help with my sanity. (Isn't that why we do it again? The hope/faith/belief that we are meant to be momma's?)

I had no MS at all. Was not really all that tired, and didn't 'feel' pg. But I was, and after 9 months, my son was literally born on his EDD; perfectly healthy.

I am pg again (37wks now) and still have anxiety and tension. Despite my now almost 2YO son, it seems impossible that I will be blessed with 2 living children.

You are not alone. It is so hard to let go. I suggest lots of talking, meditation and release of those fears. Hang in there -find that glimmer of hope that works in your life.
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#5 of 10 Old 08-30-2005, 11:21 AM
 
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I experienced a miscarriage, with a pregnancy soon after. No morning sickness, few "symptoms" of pregnancy. I managed to stay optimistic and 9 months later my son was born. I think that no matter how much you try to "protect" yourself, if something goes wrong, it will hurt. Therefore, try to think positively and not "protect" yourself so much. It might make the first trimester a little easier. Hang in there!
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#6 of 10 Old 09-04-2005, 09:00 PM
 
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Hi Sarah,
I just found out today I am pregnant and I feel the same way you do. I don't plan on telling anyone until 12 weeks. I think I'm probably going to be checking my underwear compulsively until that time if I make it. Just want to let you know I feel for you and I'm sorry you're going through this.

~Katherine
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#7 of 10 Old 09-09-2005, 09:24 AM
 
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hi hon,
i hear you. i am 9 wks pg right now and miscarried at 10wks in april. i've had my 3rd dream this week that i will miscarry again.

do you know anything about your miscarriage? if it was a blighted ovum,then a a short series ofblood tests could confirm that that is or isn't a problem this time.

nourish yourself...healthy foods, fresh air, move your body,meditate. something that always helps me is to know that any amount of time i have with the child inside of me, i wouldn't give back for the world. whether it be 7 weeks, 13 weeks, or if baby is born healthy and well. talk to your midwives, they can be very helpful in helping you through this time. tell them how worried you are. also, remember it is very common fora first pg to miscarry and the chances of the next pregnancy being successful is very high.

peace,
sarah

Mama to girl (11), boy (7) and girl (4).  "Can't we all just get along?" joy.gif
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#8 of 10 Old 09-09-2005, 12:39 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by kathteach
Hi Sarah,
I just found out today I am pregnant and I feel the same way you do. I don't plan on telling anyone until 12 weeks. I think I'm probably going to be checking my underwear compulsively until that time if I make it. Just want to let you know I feel for you and I'm sorry you're going through this.

~Katherine
I had 2 early m/c and found out I was pg again on the EDD of the first m/c. I was scared and like pp said I checked my underware and cervix constantly until about 15 weeks. I was so worried, kind of waiting for the other shoe to drop. I know it's hard you will be in my thoughts.
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#9 of 10 Old 09-09-2005, 04:16 PM
 
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During my last pregnancy, I too had a hard time avoiding being freaked about another miscarriage. One thing that helped me was knowing that no matter how the pregnancy turned out, I was positive I wasn't going to look back and wish I'd freaked out more. Kind of helped remind me that freaking out wasn't going to make the outcome anymore positive.

Best wishes

Lisa

Lisa , married to Dan, mama to IVF miracle Natalie 5/20/09 :
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#10 of 10 Old 09-10-2005, 12:09 AM
 
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I know exactly how scary it is and really feel for you. I had 2 m/c before having ds and was worried sick. I never had any morning sickness with any of my pregnancies (and my hcg levels were 4-5 times the avg with ds). It is not an indicator of hormone levels or possibility of m/c. In fact, I had fewer symptoms with my healthy pregnancy than I did with the others, and it took much longer before I had them. You can certainly have a healthy pregnancy without feeling sick, run down, or even pregnant.

Best wishes for a happy and healthy pregnancy!
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