Is 5 too late? - Mothering Forums

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#1 of 10 Old 04-11-2010, 12:31 AM - Thread Starter
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After years of trying to convince my spouse of the severity of our son's issues, it seems we are finally on the same page.

He's been evaluated multiple times, but somehow always manages to fall through the cracks. Recently though, he has become so disengaged (as other kids behaviors are getting more complicated) that she can't disagree anymore.

Still, have been getting 2 hr ST weekly (1 through school, 1 private), and 1 hr priavte OT weekly for about 1.5 years. I have inconsistently applied Floortime stuff at home for the past 2.5 years (quite consistently the first year)

Things are just getting much, much worse with my poor boy. I just feel horrible that all this time was lost to us to do some massive intervention, and I look at him now and he is just so big and old to me now. I feel like I let the "magic window" close on him and it's all my fault.

Is it too late to see incredible results starting so late? (he just turned 5) We are planning on getting an RDI consultant, etc... (if you remember any of my recent posts, you would note the desperation there )

sorry for the long post
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#2 of 10 Old 04-11-2010, 12:38 AM
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No, it's not too late.

"Isn't life a series of images that change as they repeat themselves?" - Andy Warhol
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#3 of 10 Old 04-11-2010, 01:54 AM
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It's never too late. Some things can't even be dx'ed young, and some kids have their dx change over time.

What kind of evals have you had done?

but everything has pros and cons  shrug.gif

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#4 of 10 Old 04-11-2010, 02:07 AM
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My son has made the most developmental (autism specific) progress so far from ages 5 to 6. That developmental window and the brain slams shut stuff is simply not supported by any science. No, it's not too late. Try to look forward instead of backward to the "if only" stuff. He's got a huge future in front of him. The backwards regret type looking does no one good. Be easy on yourself.

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#5 of 10 Old 04-11-2010, 03:13 PM
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Your child also has an involved family in his favor. I work with some kids who have autism in a school setting, and even the older ones still gain skills over time.
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#6 of 10 Old 04-11-2010, 09:21 PM
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Never. He's been getting ST and OT, and you've done some RDI. You're an engaged parent. All of those things have laid a good foundation for him, regardless of his issues.

And the more we learn about the brain, the more we know that it's much more flexible and capable of change, right up through adulthood. Think about it: If the brain wasn't capable of change, no adult would be able to learn a new skill.

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#7 of 10 Old 04-11-2010, 10:05 PM
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No, it's not too late. I think that ALL parents wish they had "known" earlier or "done something" sooner - that's natural, but you are doing the very best you can with the information you have. It's not too late!!

Good luck to you!

SAHM to my and and due in summer 2010, married to my best friend.
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#8 of 10 Old 04-13-2010, 12:10 AM
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My youngest is 6yrs 10mos. This month he has started telling us stuff that happened to him when his older brother takes him to the park across the street!! Wheee!! In the past if you asked him to tell you what he did he's either get mad at you or not seem to be able to tell you what happened. One of the ways schools test comprehension is if you can retell a story that was told to you. Well he just did that!

We started speech therapy when he was 2 1/2. back then it was a struggle to even get him to open his mouth. Now he actually tries to make sounds and seems to get what you are asking of him. Too late? Nah but I do think some things are done too early before a child is ready. I guess that's what it means to be developmentally delayed.

Best wishes!
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#9 of 10 Old 04-14-2010, 10:21 PM
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It's not too late. The human brain is dynamic and it's capable of learning at any age.
It's true younger children do pick up concepts faster, but I've found some of the best improvements my child has had came as she was older and I think she's going to continue to have even more improvements as time goes on.

Normal is just a setting on your dryer.
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#10 of 10 Old 04-14-2010, 10:50 PM
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It is never too late! DS is 5 and I am seeing very rapid acquisition of concepts and language, more so than age 3 and 4. Learning is life-long and I don't think it should ever end. Personally, just for example, I learned the most amount of social skills at age 15ish and then again in college.
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