Potty Training Questions/Suggestions - Mothering Forums

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#1 of 4 Old 06-03-2010, 06:54 PM - Thread Starter
 
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My son is about 3.75 years old and has delays/disabilities related to damage to part of his brain. He is not yet walking independently.

He talks about peeing and pooping a lot and pretends to do it (but not near the toilet). He will pee every evening when we put him on the toilet. He often tells me when he has a poopy diaper and he seems to reserve pooping for when we are at home. We have tried to offer him rewards (i.e. a special piece of chocolate or wearing special underwear) if he will poop on the toilet, but so far this hasn't worked.

My question is how do I know if he has control over his bladder and bowels? The few times I have put him in "big boy" underwear he has simply peed in them, but often after several hours. He often also poops first thing in the morning so it is hard to get him to the toilet before he poops in his diaper. Often when I ask him if he wants to sit on the toilet he says no, but as I said he does do it every night and most the time he does pee. When he does poop in his diaper he seems to be conscious of what he is doing, meaning he seems to like to do it in private or he gets a special look on his face. I think he is aware of it when it is happening, but I just wonder if he can tell right before when he needs to poop that he is about to poop, if that makes sense. I would really like to try to work on this with him more, but I'm trying to figure out if he has the physical ability to do it. Thoughts or experiences to share? And any recs for good books or websites that address potty training with special needs children? I feel like most that I have looked at (of course) are geared towards NT kids and I don't know where we fit in.

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#2 of 4 Old 06-03-2010, 07:51 PM
 
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Stress-Free Potty Training (not specifically for SN kids, but very helpful to me)
http://www.amazon.com/Stress-Free-Po...=ATVPDKIKX0DER

Toilet Training for Individuals with Autism or Other Developmental Issues (helpful, but probably not a stand-alone book for your pottying needs)
http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/193...YSZ7120D86Y77W

It sounds like your DS is ready for you to start working with him. Says the tired mommy who's been at this more than a year! My DS is doing both on the potty regularly, but he still wets his pants a bit every day. Sigh.

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#3 of 4 Old 06-04-2010, 02:13 AM
 
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We're kind of in the same spot. I'm not sure if Linden can control his pee. He's extremely verbal and if you ask him about peeing in the potty he'll say "sometimes I can pee and sometimes it won't come out and sometimes I don't know that it does." So I don't know if that's standard "i'm not totally aware of my body" little kid issue, or if he really can't control it all the time.

He's peed in the potty a few times, but not consistently. So I know that he can do it sometimes. But today he wanted to pee in the potty and stood there for a full 15 minutes telling me that there was something in there but it didn't want to come out. Actually he told me that his pee didn't like me or his sister talking but that it didn't mind if he talked. It still didn't come out, but at least his pee's annoyance with us talking was amusing.
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#4 of 4 Old 06-08-2010, 09:42 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Thanks KimPM for those links/suggestions. Our library only has electronic copies of Stress Free Potty Training, but I read several sections and it was really helpful. We are starting with naked time and having DS wear his big boy underwear. And there are just several times a day when we sit on the potty "to see what happens." Amazingly it is going really well! He still isn't to the point of telling me he needs to pee or poop but he is going naked or just wearing big boy underwear for several hours at a time with no "accidents" and when I put him on the toilet he has been peeing and pooping. I know it is going to be a long road but I do feel encouraged that he can actually hold it and control it a bit.

Thanks as well MotherWhimsey for sharing your experiences with Linden. That is absolutely hilarious what he said about the pee not wanting to come out! What a character! Anyway, I hope you have some greater success soon too. I think a lot of it is practice and it takes a while to get the feel for when one really needs to use the bathroom, especially if there are other challenges going on like what our children experience.

Would love to hear if other tips or suggestions come up!

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