I don't know if DS is just normal (but intense) or if his little quirks signal something more serious. A couple people on another thread I started (here
) suggested I look into SPD so wondering if you all can talk to me about it...
DS is almost 18mos.
He is very high-needs. He has gone through 'separation anxiety' since the day he was born & he doesn't settle down once I'm out of sight, he just escalates. He has a high suck need and nurses several times an hour, though he can sometimes go longer stretches during the day if we really distract him. He wakes up frequently throughout the night and will ONLY nurse back to sleep (we're going through another bad phase & he's waking every 45-90mins but a few weeks ago he'd sleep for as long as 3-6 hours straight some nights, though the 6 hour end is rare).
He spit up all day long, massive amounts, from birth to about 6-9 months and now usually doesn't spit up unless he has a cold. He has always gagged or spit out his food and is getting better about swallowing most things (but still spits out grapes or oranges for example after he chews them a bit). He is always asking to eat but rarely takes more than a bite or two (though he loves fruit & tofu hot dogs right now & will sometimes eat more of those but it's really hit or miss).
He loves to be flipped upside down, tossed around, roll around on the ground with me, 'flying', running in my arms, jumping, etc. and those are almost sure-fire way to calm him. But he hates swings. He used to hate the car but doesn't mind it since we got a new car seat 6mos ago (though we still never drive more than 45mins because he hates long rides). However he's really not all that active, I'm not sure if that's because he can't/doesn't want to be or because he wants to stay near me & I'm not that active due to medical issues. For example, if we go to the playground, he wants to just sit & watch everyone. He will play a bit if I encourage him but mostly he prefers to be in my arms or sitting next to me, mostly watching the other kids or picking up rocks & digging in the sand. But he doesn't like to have dirty hands and is always asking for soap when we're outside, and wipes off any dirt on his or my pants.
He is pretty strong & most of his development was a bit ahead of schedule (pulled to standing at 5mos, taking steps at 7mos though he waited 'til he had it 'perfect' around 12mos to walk full-time, has 300+ spoken words & starting to say short phrases, can stand on one foot, brush his own teeth, spit in the sink, take deep breaths, climb everything, etc. -- basically good physical & verbal development, weight right on track for growth, good muscle tone, etc.)
He hates the vacuum & white noise from the radio but loves white noise from the TV or a/c etc. He loves loves loves music. He has really good hearing (or maybe good attention?) & seems to pick up on things like airplanes flying overhead or trucks in the distance even when we're in the house. He responds very well to songs, humming, rhymes, etc. when he's upset (as long as he is not wanting to nurse, that is!) We took him to see fireworks & they were in the distance (so, not loud) but he was TERRIFIED of the sight of them. He's also scared of puppets or people in costumes but I'm guessing that's normal for toddlers...
I don't know if I'm even focusing on the right things here... He just seems to get very very upset soooo often all day long. And I can't always figure out why. It's like everything needs to be JUST RIGHT and he needs constant stimulation & interaction. I don't know, I feel like he's so strong & healthy & smart so how could there be something wrong with him? But at the same time he doesn't seem 'right' to me, he's just so extreme & intense... Any insight????