Wait LIst...how to keep a balance? - Mothering Forums
Special Needs Parenting > Wait LIst...how to keep a balance?
mrforbes's Avatar mrforbes 09:02 AM 08-16-2011

Hi there,

We're new here but our DS (3) is now on a waitlist for a dual evaluation of speech and autism. The wait for an evaluation is now 4-6 months, but she hinted that were some scheduling shuffles in Sept. and we might not have to wait the whole 4-6 months but no promises of course.


How do you wait and keep a balance? DH is already trying to 'coach' DS and I can tell that's going to drive me crazy!


Also, since DS is 3 so this sort of a general question. If we are seeing things now with his speech and the autism spectrum, how does it change/could it change in the next year? I know that's a really general question; we def. have some sensory issues which is how we ended up with the eval. appt., tiptoe walking  & some rocking (but not all the time) def. in his own world with what he talks about and plays, social things - he doesn't really 'get' how to interact with people (esp. children) but def. wants to so he'll be too loud, run through and not be able to follow the game etc and some occupational things but his speech is a big thing - he repeats a lot, doesn't answer or do conversations a lot but he does talk - usually playing out a book or storyline that he's seen, he talks as if he's been talked to and stuff like that.



Linda on the move's Avatar Linda on the move 09:22 AM 08-16-2011

hug2.gif  I actually laughed out loud when I read the part about your DH coaching your child. It's so sweet, so daddy like!


An evaluation is sort of like a photo. It's just a picture of where you child is right now, and sometimes a guess about what that means. Just as you don't expect a photo of your child taken at age 3 to let you know exactly what they will look like as an adult, an evaluation can't tell you exactly what your child will be like later.


If there is something significant going on with your little guy, he'll have more evaluations later. My DD is now a teen, she had her first evaluation at age 3 and had her last evaluation at age 13, which I thought would be the last/last one, but now we are talking about doing a new one her senior year of highschool (she's college bound and on the spectrum!) to help arrange accommodations for her at university. 


--  May be if you remember this is just one step on the path, it  will help you relax about it a little --


My advice to you, as a mom who is just starting down this path, is to try to live in the moment with your child. Try to enjoy him right now, today. Take some pictures or videos, just watch watch him. Don't let his life be totally about his quirkiness. Also, take care of yourself. Take a little time each week to do something you enjoy that isn't about your husband and children. Go out to lunch with a friend, or watch a chick flick, or what ever it is that is fun  FOR YOU.


(If you didn't have the eval scheduled, I would advise getting on the list, but once you are on the list, go back to enjoying him and taking a little time for yourself)