Anyone else's child HATE having his/her hair done? - Mothering Forums

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#1 of 11 Old 10-23-2011, 03:57 PM - Thread Starter
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My daughter HATES having her hair brushed, cut, whatever, I assume because of sensory issues.  She fights so hard I can't get a clip or ponytail holder in it to keep it out of her eyes.  The best I can do is quickly trim her bangs while DH holds her.  Any suggestions from others who have BTDT?

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#2 of 11 Old 10-23-2011, 07:52 PM
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DS is like that. He has curly hair, so we cut it short. He will sit still for his dad to run a razor over his head every six months or so. He washes it every day and we towel dry it and that's it. 


I wore my hair very short when I was girl because I was a swimmer. There are some really cute hair cuts out there. 

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#3 of 11 Old 10-23-2011, 08:16 PM
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DD2 is like that. She just screeches and freaks out whenever I even start to THINK about going near her head with a brush. DD1 used to be like that but she finally outgrew it.

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#4 of 11 Old 10-23-2011, 08:22 PM
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My DD hated getting her hair brushed and wouldn't let me do anything with it until about a month ago, now its braided everyday. I'm not sure what changed her mind but I'm going with it. My only suggestion is to just be patient.

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I do what works and when it stops working, then I do something else.
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#5 of 11 Old 10-24-2011, 04:11 AM
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My daughter is the same, we have a special brush that helps with that called a "tangle teezer" If you put that in google you'll find many places to buy it from. It does help a lot. I also use a water spray with a small amount of conditioner in it. it does the same job as detangling spray. 

Before she used to scream when I did her hair, the neighbours must have thought I was murdering her. Now it's much better, sometimes she will play up. I'm pretty sure when she does it's because she is being difficult not that it hurts so much. 


Hope this helps :)


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#6 of 11 Old 10-27-2011, 05:14 PM
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My son has a super sensitive scalp, even the slightest touch of the comb sends him screaming. Just the sight of it, really.


His OT suggested giving him something very sensory rich to do with his hands, squeeze playdough or hold onto a studded sensory ball, while I do his hair so those sensory messages are 'louder' to his brain that the ones coming from his scalp. It seems to work; he still hates having his hair combed, but not quite as much.

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#7 of 11 Old 10-27-2011, 10:06 PM
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Raises hand. Another oversensitive to hair brushing, etc. kiddo here. It's funny in a way, b/c Sophie is so undersensitive to many stimuli, but not on her scalp. No way! orngtongue.gif


I persevere anyway with styling her hair, b/c she's really got to have it out of her face or she gets food in it and such. So we keep it long with no bangs, and then I french braid it or put it in various configurations of pigtails or ponytails. She usually doesn't mind the actual braiding/styling part, it's the brushing beforehand she freaks out most about.


On a good day, I have my "Sophie team" to help me, i.e. her older sibs. One distracts her by singing songs, while another holds her hands, if needed. I recently figured out that if I give her a comb or brush to hold while I'm doing her hair, it helps and gives her something to do with her hands other than try to stop me, lol. But I learned the hard way not to have her hold the ponytail holders, b/c those she'll just fling and then announce happily, "All gone! All done Sophie's hair! You need to let me go NOW!"


If no sibs are available and I'm styling solo, I will often put Curious George or something on my laptop and set it in front of her while I work on her hair; this is another effective distraction tool for us.


Other things that help are to always condition her hair well when washing it, and then combing it out completely while still wet, to avoid later tangles, otherwise she wakes up the next morning looking like a Fraggle. scared.gif And I also sometimes use a spray detangler in between washings, along with a very wide-toothed comb, to get out all the snarls before I begin to put it up with a regular brush.


I have managed to trim the ends of her hair myself once or twice in the past year, but I've never tried taking her to a salon -- I shudder to think how she'd react. The running joke in our house is that Sophie will never have short hair b/c we would have to put her under general anesthesia in order to cut it.


Good luck; we feel your pain!



caffix.giftoddler.gifnocirc.gifBusy, grateful mama to: Kieran (12); Hanna (10); Cameron (8);
Charlotte (6);Sophie (5) Down Syndrome & so beautiful! brokenheart.gif(9/08), & rainbow1284.gifDuncan 8/26/09
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#8 of 11 Old 11-07-2011, 05:23 PM
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My 9 year old still hates having her hair brushed and will absolutely not go to a hairdresser to have it cut. I cut it a few times when she was small and that helped a good deal with the fact that she would not stand for having it brushed, but lately she has decided she likes her hair long so no more cutting. She often gets huge mats in her hair and we've talked about it so many times: either brush it daily or cut it short. Finally my mother came over and made her sit while she got out all the knots (DD is less likely to protest when its someone she is not totally comfortable with, though I could tell she was not a happy camper). Since that time I have remembered to brush it every day so that the knots are not bad at all and now DD can tolerate it better and realizes that its better to do it this way. But she never remembers to do it herself, which is fine right now.


She still, however, refuses to wear any kind of clip, hair tie, you name it. She'll humour me for a while, or wear it in a ponytail if absolutely necessary (like in gym class it was required), but will pull it out otherwise. 


My feeling is that it is her hair and I have no right to force styles or any such thing upon her. The mats were, in my opinion, a health issue (not good for the scalp) plus it made us look like we were neglecting our children. We've found a solution that works now, phew. :-)

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#9 of 11 Old 11-14-2011, 11:41 AM
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My ds is 4 and I can't wash, brush or cut his hair. We had headlice in august and I had DH hold him down wrapped in a towel while I buzzed all his hair off. There was no way he was going to sit still and tolerate me combing and doing headlice treatments.

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#10 of 11 Old 11-14-2011, 12:15 PM
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My 4 year old L hates hates hates having her hair combed..The sight of a brush brings on tears...When I start brushing she cries and says I want to hug you I want to hug you so I will stop..Her hair is super curly and I have to spray it with water+a bit of conditioner to get the brush through in the am's because if I don't her hair gets super wild and crazy...She has never had a hair cut so we haven't crossed that bridge yet...I think she has a super sensitive scalp and  this will continue to be a problem for us:>(

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#11 of 11 Old 11-14-2011, 02:25 PM
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Both of my kids hate having their hair brushed. The each have long curly, wavy thick hair.  My aunt told me to get argon oil, which is like a leave in conditioner.  I keep meaning to go the beauty supply store and get some, but have not tried it yet.  I am hoping it will make mornings easier.  Since they are getting old enough, I often make at least ds take care of his own brushing.  Some days it does not get done.

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