Success with CBT for Separation Anxiety/ADHD & no meds?? - Page 2 - Mothering Forums

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#31 of 31 Old 08-19-2012, 09:29 AM
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That sounds great Cleo! Congrats and hope he continues on this positive trajectory.


My dd1 who is a bright kid with some ADD (inattentive) behaviors and a lot of anxiety issues is really excited about going to the small charter school. I have my fingers crossed that it will be a good fit for her. There will be about 8-10 girls in her grade so I'm hoping she can find someone to click with, but so glad that she's excited about it. The idea of traditional middle school was just overwhelming for her. 


I'm a big proponent of pushing a little bit with anxiety issues. It's a tightrope though because both pushing too much and letting the kids completely avoid the situation cause the anxiety level to increase and they will be more anxious about that situation and similar situations in the future. They need to be in situations (like the small class you describe) where they can stretch a little bit past their comfort zone and have success (like the swimming lessons). Then they start to build up confidence. Works that way for the rest of us, too, but if we don't usually suffer from anxiety we don't encounter so many situations where we have to stretch that little bit. IMO, it's that doing a teeny bit more than you're comfortable with that allows you to grow. Definitely don't want to throw them in the deep end before they know how to swim, though. Just a gentle nudge and working through. As a parent we have to be able to read the situation and our child's anxiety about it well enough to know when it's worth pushing that little bit and when to back off completely. If my kid is anxious about going free climbing up a sheer cliff, I don't need to push her to do that. That's a fine situation to avoid completely, but if she's anxious about going to middle school, finding an alternative (charter school or IEP, etc) is a great way to make the situation work w/o throwing her in the deep end. 

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