Dr wants assessment, school doesn't think its neccessary?
So my DD has always had some issues at school. She has anxiety, and a lot of other behaviours/learning struggles that I feel are being overlooked.
This is our FOURTH school year where we yet again are so frustrated that we just want to pull her out. However, she gets on very well socially and does not want to leave the school because she really enjoys seeing her friends at lunch and recess. I fear pulling her out now, and the transition issues that would ensue would cause more damage than harm.
However, her learning is really behind, and its being overlooked. She was recently told she needed to go back to the spelling level she was at in the beginning of grade 1 (shes in grade 3) until she gets them all right and then she can proceed. With no help. No one seems to think this is odd. She reads above grade level, but can't make sense of letters/phonetics/spelling, and this is the answer?
I had to request she see the counselor at school because she is now in her 4th year of being petrified of the bathroom to the point where she refuses to go and is nearly wetting herself by the time she gets home from school. There are a lot of other anxiety related issues, and also many sensory as well. She wears headphones in class (that she says do not help) and sits on a 'sizzle seat' as she is incredibly distractable. She HATES sitting with a partner, or any kind of partner work. She has been telling me lately (and this is not the first time, shes said this a lot in past) that she cries every day in class because she doesn't understand the work. Of course her teacher is on some type of leave and the sub does things very different, so that's not helping.
She also has sleep disturbances (always had) - night terrors. Has a panic attack with loud sudden noises, or low droning sounds. Spent an entire summer once with her hands over her ears. Is sensitive to certain clothing and sensations to the point of a melt down. She has always been very quick to be overstimulated, that has come on with age, but still holds true.
There's so much more. While each concern, on its own may be fine, we have always, always felt there is a deeper issue here.
I emailed the school counselor to tell her that our GP suggested we go private and have her assessed, and she seemed to think that was over the top. But the school certainly isn't helping at all!!! No one has referred her for learning support, even though every year I am in there harping on about her self esteem being damaged because she can't focus and doesn't 'understand' direction (her words).
I suppose I should be happy that the email at least got the ball rolling in that they are having a team based meeting regarding her on Monday. Hopefully they can be helpful and we can put off assessement as its really expensive. But, I'm willing to dip into our down payment $$, as a single income family if it means I can get some answers to help her thrive.
She is such a beautiful, soulful, sensitive, creative artistic child and to see her like this is just heartbreaking. It seems to ebb and flow, as every year we get to breaking point, and then things seem to get better for a while.
I don't really know why I'm writing this, partly that I need to vent, and also I really need some support from other parents who understand where I am coming from. I am so sick of people who only see part of the picture poo-pooing my concerns away. I am very aware that there are many kids at her school with greater needs, that are more disruptive and may not have parental support, so I know that she is not on the priority list for them by any means. But I'm just not willing to stand idly by anymore.
If you read this, thank you!!!!!!!!!!!!