Dh filing a complaint against his boss w/human resources - Page 5 - Mothering Forums
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#121 of 165 Old 08-04-2007, 12:46 PM
 
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Well, wait and see what happens. If HR is not moving fast enough, he can always start cc'ing HR reps boss on emails. What will he have to lose at that point? It seriously sounds to me like she (HR rep) may be in over her head. I would have issued some serious warnings to the manager at this point and seen about a transfer for your dh. The bad thing about bully managers is that when people leave the company they don't want to "burn bridges" so they don't always tell what is going on. Though HR may have an inkling of how she is, if your dh is the first person to come forward they may be struggling w/ having enough documentation to fire his manager. I don't know, just speculating.....
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#122 of 165 Old 08-04-2007, 03:38 PM
 
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I'm angry for you Michelle. Having this loom over your head without any definitive direction must be maddening. At least I know I'd be going cuckoo! Please keep us all posted, you've got lots of folks rooting for you.
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#123 of 165 Old 08-04-2007, 04:50 PM - Thread Starter
 
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They shouldn't transfer dh, I actually think it's illegal for them to suggest it. If he went into the office and started slewing off a bunch of racial slurs against her, she wouldn't be moved, he would (if he even kept a job).

He did tell HR rep he'd give her enough time to talk to her boss and see what to do, so that's why he's giving her until the end of the week. This new development about raises just was brought to his attention Thursday, right before he left.

My sister works for an attorney- maybe I'll see if he can write something up- since we have all the info. He's not an employment attorney, but at this point, anything could help, right? Sort of a 'cease and desist' letter. I'm going to see her today- I'll ask her what she thinks.

Michelle -mom to Katlyn 4/00 , Jake 3/02, and Seth 5/04
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#124 of 165 Old 08-04-2007, 10:49 PM
 
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I'm so sorry you guys are going through this!

My guess is that they've already talked to their lawyer and are either waiting for them to give the HR reps direction, or they're looking at all of the documentation you've given them and are trying to turn it around against you.

Hang in there. Stay strong.

s
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#125 of 165 Old 08-05-2007, 12:07 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Actually, the documentation we gave them is just printouts of the EEOC stating you can't discriminate against someone b/c of the association w/a person w/a disability and then the timeframe of when we filed FMLA and his duties changed.

Of course, they will be trying to prove he's substandard, but if he's all of a sudden substandard in the past 6 mos only (since FMLA was filed) that's a HUGE coincidence, that is hard to over look from a discrimination standpoint.

There is a possibility they've talked to the lawyer, but until this past week, HR rep still thought this was a misunderstanding that could be talked through.

I'll post when I hear something new.

Michelle -mom to Katlyn 4/00 , Jake 3/02, and Seth 5/04
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#126 of 165 Old 08-05-2007, 12:39 PM
 
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Hey Michelle,

I found out today that the mom of a friend from another board is one of the FMLA analysts for the state of Az. I don't know either one of them well, but I figured any little bit could help you. Lemme know if you'd like me to get some contact information for the analyst lady.
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#127 of 165 Old 08-05-2007, 01:58 PM - Thread Starter
 
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That's great! For now, I think I'll hold off, but I may take you up on the offer depending on what happens this week.

Michelle -mom to Katlyn 4/00 , Jake 3/02, and Seth 5/04
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#128 of 165 Old 08-05-2007, 10:08 PM
 
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#129 of 165 Old 08-05-2007, 10:46 PM
 
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I just read this entire thread, and wanted to send good luck vibes to both you and your DH!
I am wishing for your family the best possible outcome to this situation!

Michelle
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#130 of 165 Old 08-06-2007, 10:13 AM
 
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I don't want you guys to get screwed. Please see a lawyer. I just don't trust companies.
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#131 of 165 Old 08-07-2007, 10:13 PM
 
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Is there an update yet today?
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#132 of 165 Old 08-08-2007, 02:23 AM - Thread Starter
 
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I'm on my way to bed- last couple of days crazy with school.

After he found out all the reviews had been given, he emailed his boss. She tried to set up a meeting, he said he just wants to confirm the status of the raise. She said he needs the official review and can't talk about it on the phone. Fine. He said he needs HR present, then changed his mind and told her he just wants the review ASAP. Well, now she's decided she wants a meeting w/HR, dh, her and her boss. This can't be good- what good can possibly come from this situation? NONE. So, he emailed HR and bosslady's boss stating he hopes this isn't a meeting to discuss the discrimination, only the review. He wants the review. He doesn't want to discuss the discrimination w/everyone in the room b/c it will end up with a bunch of accusations and he said/she said pissing contest stuff.

So, he has a meeting w/HR alone (she has a question for him, she said-no idea what) tomorrow (Wed) and with boss, boss's boss, and HR on Thursday. He's then off on Fri. He's going to tell them he's filing the complaint and if they end up doing the right thing, he'll drop it, but until then- he has to proceed.

Students return to school tomorrow, (I've been getting set up all week) so I probably won't be back to check in until Friday, but I will post as soon as I can.

Thanks for thinking of us, I appreciate the support.

Michelle -mom to Katlyn 4/00 , Jake 3/02, and Seth 5/04
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#133 of 165 Old 08-08-2007, 10:40 AM
 
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I really think he should take his lawyer with him from now on.
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#134 of 165 Old 08-09-2007, 12:07 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Ok, hr asked him if the first time he asked about FMLA was the email he forwarded to her- he said yes. That was the question for today. Tomorrow is the full on meeting. It's actually only minorly about the review- HR said this is the next step in the process and she can't do anything else without this meeting. So, he will meet with them and not say anything. I told him he can't just say nothing. Bosslady is going to be on major defensive and he WILL be attacked (hopefully not as bad in front of HR, but it will happen). This will be the first direct contact with her (and her boss) on the issue.

On Friday- unless this is settled TOMORROW, he will be calling EEOC to do the intake of the case. I think he'll call a lawyer and set up a consult as well.

This is such a roller coaster- sometimes it seems so good, sometimes so bad. I just want it done.

Michelle -mom to Katlyn 4/00 , Jake 3/02, and Seth 5/04
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#135 of 165 Old 08-09-2007, 10:57 PM - Thread Starter
 
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The meeting for today with everyone today was cancelled b/c boss's boss was still out of town (was supposed to be back in yesterday). Dh talked to HR and asked basically what was going on- she said she didn't see what he was claiming and they needed to have a big meeting to discuss. She said the bosslady had emailed her 'not long' before dh filed for FMLA to ask about his 'chronic illness' (he called out 2x in 1 week b/c of a sore throat). IMO, that proves our case even more, but she didn't see it that way. So, he's having the official 'you suck' meeting on Monday. He already has an appt set up with the EEOC on the 31st of the month.

He did think up a 'win-win' situation that he mentioned to hr today- his dept is getting bigger- there are 2 basically separate entities in the 1 dept and one of those entities are getting large enough to split off on it's own. He said bosslady won't be able to keep working w/dh, so if they split, he can have the 1, she can have the other and they'll be equals. She can still be miserable, but at least won't effect his career path.

So, I was REALLY pissed off when I heard the meeting was cancelled. He's calm about the whole thing and I've calmed down, too. We have the EEOC meeting, we'll call a lawyer (or the EEOC will provide one if they feel it's justified).

Michelle -mom to Katlyn 4/00 , Jake 3/02, and Seth 5/04
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#136 of 165 Old 08-09-2007, 11:01 PM
 
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I've been following along, and what a rollercoaster!
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#137 of 165 Old 08-09-2007, 11:02 PM
 
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I'm rooting for you and hope all turns out well!!
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#138 of 165 Old 08-10-2007, 12:21 AM
 
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I really hope he'll consider having a non-involved party (like a lawyer) at the meeting on Monday. He needs a witness.

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#139 of 165 Old 08-10-2007, 01:07 AM - Thread Starter
 
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I'm pretty sure they wouldn't allow a lawyer at the meeting- since it's only an internal investigation. I'll suggest it, but I think HR being there is the closest thing to a neutral party. It looks like we're going to have to really fight this- though we're not really surprised.

That's ok- at this point, it's just bosslady, with them denying the discrimination, that makes them guilty as well, so we can go after both. And, maybe dh will either be able to get a better job there (not likely, I know) or a job closer to home. As of right now, he drives an hour each way to work.

Michelle -mom to Katlyn 4/00 , Jake 3/02, and Seth 5/04
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#140 of 165 Old 08-10-2007, 01:07 AM - Thread Starter
 
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I'll post more next week (or sooner if I can and there's new developments).

Michelle -mom to Katlyn 4/00 , Jake 3/02, and Seth 5/04
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#141 of 165 Old 08-10-2007, 01:55 AM
 
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There are very few places you are not allowed to bring a lawyer.
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#142 of 165 Old 08-10-2007, 10:32 AM
 
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It is a very common misconception that HR personnel are either neutral or on the worker's side. The very opposite is true. HR persons are hired to protect the interests of the company.

I also want to warn about your DH signing any papers or being told to write a statement. Have either of those items looked over very carefully by your own lawyer. I myself was a victim of discrimination in my last job, but in my hurt and haste I signed a document that eventually led to my NOT being able to win a suit.

All the best. I've been checking in on this thread and have been and will be rooting for you.
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#143 of 165 Old 08-10-2007, 10:43 AM
 
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This is a stall tactic. File now with the EEOC. They're trying to trip him up. Get the lawyer immediately. HR is NOT a neutral party (dh knows this from experience ).
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#144 of 165 Old 08-10-2007, 10:21 PM - Thread Starter
 
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We know HR isn't neutral and they're out to protect the company. Of course, they're out to protect the company. The problem is by not doing anything, they're now condoning the discrimination and will be part of the lawsuit instead of just bosslady being named.

He's got an appt for the EEOC and we're still looking for a lawyer. He won't sign anything and if they offer anything, he 'will think about it for a while and get back' with them.

Thanks all for the support. I have to say, I'm not surprised- just a bit disappointed. I was hoping they'd see what a clear cut case this is and manage it appropriately. Anyone outside of the company will be able to see it- counter point or not. It's just a matter of time.

Michelle -mom to Katlyn 4/00 , Jake 3/02, and Seth 5/04
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#145 of 165 Old 08-10-2007, 10:26 PM
 
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I understand your disappointment. There's nothing wrong with hoping it would turn out the right way w/out extra involvement.
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#146 of 165 Old 08-11-2007, 11:56 PM
 
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#147 of 165 Old 08-13-2007, 10:04 PM
 
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Bump. Any update today?
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#148 of 165 Old 08-13-2007, 10:32 PM - Thread Starter
 
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He had the meeting today- couldn't give me much detail b/c he had just gotten out and was still at work, of course. He's going to call me from his cell on his lunch break. It was pretty much what we thought it would be, from what I could get out of him, but I really want details. Most likely it was a huge, heaping pile of horse shit trying to keep them out of trouble, but we know what it really is and will go forward w/EEOC.

Michelle -mom to Katlyn 4/00 , Jake 3/02, and Seth 5/04
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#149 of 165 Old 08-13-2007, 10:52 PM
 
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I'm so sorry this couldn't be easily resolved.
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#150 of 165 Old 08-13-2007, 10:58 PM
 
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for intuitive readings click here :
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