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Old 05-24-2008, 03:24 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Greetings.

I am new to the boards as a whole, but have been an avid Mothering mag reader for a few years now. It's really helped me with a lot of decisions since my son was a little over a year old.

A little bit about myself and my situation...
I'm a 27 year old mom with two kids of my own and two step kids. My fiance and I have been together for 5 years, but have known each other for over 10 now. The last few years have been bumpy because we have gone through custody battles for the older kids, another unexpected (but much loved) baby, dealing with an ADHD diagnosis and then realizing our other son needed special education.

Recently my son has gone through an Austim Eval at the early intervention in our area and he was found to fall in the spectrum and be eligible for more services. We don't know what specifically he has as of yet, but the process is beginning to figure it out. The last couple of weeks have been extremely difficult on top of that because I just completed another pregnancy for a couple who could not have children. So I've been dealing with PP hormones and our son has been getting worse in his behaviors.

We know he is high functioning because he displays a social smile and makes eye contact, but his verbal skills, obsessive behavior, sensory seeking and other issues are all huge flags to us and were what was used to diagnose him in his special education school. My fiance it still in denial about most of his problems being autism based and not something that we did or didn't do when he was younger.

The challenges we are running into now are we essentially have no support in our community. Or rather, no physical support. No one who can come and help us out or even watch him and his siblings so we can go somewhere easily. Most of the time we stay secluded at home with one or the other of us venturing out to do errands and the like. We avoid going in public with him whenever possible and that...hurts. The various disciplines we have tried for his behaviors also don't work and that in itself is incredibly frustrating. Notice how I'm using the word frustrating a lot? I sure am frustrated and would love to find out if anyone has any coping mechanisms or suggestions for a child who doesn't respond to physical discipline, talking, natural, or gentle. Nothing sinks in for him, even time outs.

The problem is he is very physical and has no idea of personal space, and it seems to me he doesn't grasp that he can hurt other people. In fact he seems to find it funny a lot of the time when he hurts someone.

The things we have begun to do are taking High Fructose Corn Syrup and heavy sugars out of his diet. We've also added a DHA and multivitamin supplement. I am trying to find more information on Chelation for young children, he is four, but haven't found much. I very much prefer natural methods to help him out than going straight to 'conventional' medicine to dope him up.

After almost 2 years of constant battles I and my husband are getting worn down and out. I am hoping this board can help us and bring some insight and small help to what feels like a very sequestered, but chaotic life.
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Old 05-24-2008, 10:23 AM
 
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Welcome!!!

You'll find some great people here with loads of experience to share!

Congratulations on your recent baby!!! I think it's wonderful that you did something so personal and caring for another couple, it's the epitome of selflessness in my opinion!

Mommy to BigBoy Ian (3-17-05) ; LittleBoy Connor (3-3-07) (DiGeorge/VCFS):; BabyBoy Gavin (10-3-09) x3 AngelBaby (1-7-06)
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Old 05-24-2008, 10:28 AM
 
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Many many . I think that frustration is one of the words I use the most and the phrase I'm "at my wits end." I am currently reading The Explosive Child. I just started it and am only on Chapter 3, but the first chapter brought tears to my eyes because the little girl sounded so much like my son and because the mother sounded like she felt so much like I do. Maybe you could pick the book up from the library. It may give some skills to deal with your son. I haven't gotten that far yet, but I'm pretty sure I have seen posts about other people reading it too.

 
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