thanks to you and everyone for thinking of me. Yesterday was our 3rd ultrasound and we lost a baby. This baby wasn't doing well the whole time, but because there was a heartbeat last ultrasound (at 7 weeks) I didn't believe we would really miscarry. Basically this baby all along had problems (too large an amniotic sac and thick yolk sac) which the doctor said over 93% chance of miscarriage by week 12. Well I'm week 14 and had no symptoms, but according to the scans yesterday the baby passed at 8 weeks 3 days gestation, so it's been a while. No blood or anything for me. Even though she told me last time I WOULD have a miscarriage, I didn't believe her (I thought she was telling me that to make me feel better!). So mixed emotions here. I AM "happy" but feel guilty, too. Apparently even if this baby lived there would have been a major structural deformity or severe birth defect, genetic anomaly etc. STILL I've never had a miscarriage and was shocked to see the baby the way it was.
ALSO this experience has taught me (I wanna say) how very appreciative and fortunate I am/feel to have Lucy & Bella, and that they BOTH made it the first pregnancy
also I wish I'd not GOTTEN an early ultrasound just to see if it was twins in the first place, cause of all the heartache and worry. A friend of mine AFTER having had twins the 1st time waited until week 18 to have her ultrasound to see if she was having twins. I wish I were stronger/more faithful in the experience and not so scared I had to find out EARLY. I was told if I'd waited for a LATER (18 week) ultrasound I'd have never even known about this and the sac of the deceased baby will be gone by then (this was vanishing or disappearing twin syndrome)
*sigh* this was all for a reason I KNOW.
I want you all to KNOW how much I love and appreciate you. This board really saved me in my darkest hour.
Melanie, vegan mommy to twin girls born Dec. 2007, and another little girl born Sept. 25th, 2009!
Wow, what a lot of emotion to process. I am happy for you that you have a healthy baby in there, and sorry you had to go through the turmoil to get here. If you can take away one good thing, let it be that you know that everyone here cares about you and wanted to help.
Betsy, mama to beautiful, strong MZ twins Lillian and Kate, born 11 weeks early on January 10, 2006.
Hugs! I'm sorry about the one baby, but happy that the other is thriving and healthy! I asked at 8 weeks for an US but my OB said not unless I had problems (bleeding, crampint, ect.) b/c so much can happen in the first trimester. Sometimes I think our technology may be too advanced!
I completely understand your mixed feelings on one being alive and growing and the loss of one. I have a one week shy of 5yr old who was a twin - lost early on. We never saw that babe on u/s, but I saw what I passed.