I've been lurking here for months, and finally, have decided to come out of lurking to seek some advice. I'm very conflicted on what to do, and I feel I could get good feedback from the women/members here.
So, quick history: I'm pregnant with boy/girl twins, currently 36 weeks 4 days. The babies are transverse/transverse at the moment, and we have a c-section scheduled for Jan 31st, when they will be 38 wks and 3 days. If they switch positions before then, we won't have the c-section, but that is the current plan as it stands today.
Last week during an ultrasound, they discovered what's called a varix in the girl's umbilical cord. Everything else (heartbeats, fluid levels, flow through cords, etc.) looked good. A varix is apparently some very rare umblilical cord complication that can lead to some terrible outcomes should something go wrong.
My doc said that in his experience, while the literature on this is dark, things typically turn out ok. He said they would normally take a baby earlier to avoid the risk of something going wrong, but he wanted to give our twins a bit more time. He said he would take the babies right then if we wanted (this was last week), but he felt it was best they stay inside a bit longer so they wouldn't have trouble breathing. He said if I notice a decrease in movements to head straight to the ER for monitoring. (And I've been beyond paranoid since!)
So, here's my question...
I have an apt tomorrow, for monitoring (NST) and ultrasound. I'm praying all will be ok. If all is ok, obviously they can stay inside longer. If things are not ok, I'm guessing they will be scheduled for delivery that day or the next.
HOWEVER, that said...
If things do look ok tomorrow, I'm wondering if I should ask to have the babies born a week earlier than we planned. Instead of at 38 weeks, at 37 weeks. I find myself so freakin' worried about this varix thing. I know it should be ok, and can be ok, but what if it's NOT ok, and I'm the one who insisted on going to 38 wks? I would never forgive myself.
I'm not sure what the right thing to do is. I'm at a total loss. Part of my heart feels all will be ok, and they deserve that extra week inside. While another part of me is terrified that leaving them there that extra week could have horrible consequences which I don't even want to think about, and if something did happen, it would be my fault. (My doc wanted to do the section at week 37, but I had asked for at least one more week.... that was before the varix, though. He would not let me just go into labor and have the c-section then, which was my first choice.)
Can any of you provide some advice? I don't want to make a bad choice based on emotions that are not based on facts, but I'm SO confused at this point! I don't know what is right. I tried for six years to have these babies, and experienced three early miscarriages... I know the past is affecting my thoughts now. But that's not helping be figure out what is right, and what isn't.
Help? Advice? Wisdom? What would you do?