Pregnant with Twins? Join the club :) - Page 4 - Mothering Forums

View Poll Results: What number of children is this for you?
1st & 2nd 24 30.00%
2nd & 3rd 31 38.75%
3rd & 4th 13 16.25%
4th & 5th 7 8.75%
5th & 6th 0 0%
6th & 7th 2 2.50%
7th & 8th 0 0%
8th & 9th 3 3.75%
9th & 10th 0 0%
Voters: 80. You may not vote on this poll

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#91 of 448 Old 08-12-2012, 03:16 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Adorkable- All of your math makes sense to me :) But, I kind of prefer the statistic of 65% of identical twins are Di-Di, because I think it would be cool to have identical twins, but we've been confirmed Di-Di. Now, on to other things: What diaper bag do you use and is there enough room in it for an extra change of clothes for a three year old too?

 

Rblakely- I agree that every practice does things differently. I've heard of some OB's that do every other week after 20 weeks! My OB does 2 in the first trimester, 3 in the second trimester, and 4 in the third trimester- the fourth one is while we are in labor, as she likes to see the exact position that the babies are in and make sure that everything is going well when you come in to the hospital. (we can decline any of these, but we probably wont) We also opted for the nuchal scan at 12 weeks, which was totally optional, so all in all if everything goes well, we can expect to have had 10 total ultrasounds, pending that I go to term.

 

I am getting SO anxious about the ultrasound next Monday to find out the sexes. I dont know why Im so anxious about it- it's not really like I care either way, it's just so exciting! Has anyone found out recently that I haven't updated about on the main page? If so , let me know :)


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#92 of 448 Old 08-12-2012, 05:36 PM
 
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i use a back pack style one Dadgear Backpack Diaper Bag  we have used it since they were a month old and to this day at 19 months, it was just our carryon again for our 3rd cross country plane flight.

i love the shallow top pouch for diapers, really keeps thing nice and handy. and i like the large center compartment. we have some smaller bags that we put in it to organize things, like one budge that was always a change of clothing, and in the young months a bag of refolds for various dribble uses.  it can be almost too cavernous without some sort of sectioning, but that is kinda a good problem to have, too many pockets jaunt makes for too long to find things.

i like that it opens all the way open like a book for packing or working out of.  the front two areas, we used the medium one for changing pad and various changing things besides the diapers themselves. and the very front one is a first aid kit and eating out stuff like bibs and table covers.

 

it has loops to attach to strollers and has held up to us tossing it around for 1 1/2 years and still looks new


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#93 of 448 Old 08-12-2012, 06:16 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Do you use cloth?


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#94 of 448 Old 08-12-2012, 07:47 PM
 
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nope though i could se the bag working just as well for many cloth systems.

 

frankly i beat myself up over cloth when i was preggo, but just decided it was one of the things i did not have time to do with twins. since then i have used a few pocket diapers and a some diapers like g diapers both with cloth and their flushable system.  and i can't to a conclusion i would not have guessed prior to having my kids...

 

i would not personally use cloth if i had all the time in the world, my kids are drier and happier longer in good disposables and a dry twin sleeping soundly is worth nearly anything in the world to me.  i know cloth is probably better for the world and I'm bummed on that front, but what is best for my babies skin needs to be my top priority and i just can't see how wet cloth against their skin is ever a good thing (that is until potty learning, i probably will do some cloth stuff then to help them feel it)  i'm bummed cause cloth is so cute, and actually use a few of the covers over my 'sposies in the summer or under dresses.

 

but I'm not bummed that i have more time to love, cuddle and sleep with my twins cause diapering is a quick non thinking action around here. they never get diaper rash since the very beginning and that was user error on my part as i learned to diaper for the first time in my adult life. (my little sister was 10 year younger than my, i clothes diapers her for years as the main babysitter, disposables was actually the strange thing for me to get used to!)

 

 i know this is way more info than you were asking about, just felt like giving voice to the hidden mothering.com minority


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#95 of 448 Old 08-12-2012, 07:52 PM - Thread Starter
 
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No, no, I agree. If I didnt already have cloth diapers for two kids (When DS was born, DD was still in diapers, so I have a stash for two) I would be SO overwhelmed at the idea of doing it with twins. But, I have them, and I've got a good system, so for me cloth is probably going to be cheaper than sposies. Im sure we will use our fair share of disposables too, but mainly cloth for us.


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Adaline love.gif (3/20/10), and Charlie brokenheart.gif (1/26/12- 4/10/12) and our identical  rainbow1284.gif  twins Callie and Wendy (01/04/13)

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#96 of 448 Old 08-12-2012, 10:09 PM
 
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Lilysamsma:

From the sounds of it you are right to think you may be getting suboptimal care.  Odd that your doc wouldn't commit or offer you a scan to confirm chorionicity.  Around 12 -14 weeks is generally a great time to determine that and placentation and cord insertions.  Also, it would make sense that the OB would want to know...if you really do have mo-mo twins, they should refer you to MFM/perinatology sooner rather than later (way before 20 weeks!).  Also, if they are even mono-di, then some folks would recommend every 2 week scans begin as early as 16 or so weeks to look for emerging twin to twin transfusion syndrome.  Hope you get some good info/an appt when you call the MFM you are being referred to.  Even if they are di-di. if your OB doesn't do a lot of twins, sometimes its good just to see MFM early on for advice on nutrition, what to expect during the twin pregnancy, etc.  Good luck and hope you find out what kind of twins you've got in there! :)

 

On the cloth front: we use pockets during the day and disposables at night.  My DH insists that the girls sleep better in disposables and he never insists on anything!  So, we do both.  I'm with Adorkable...having 2 sleeping babies at the same time is so worth it!  Building my stash of newborn & small diapers as ours last time around were graciously loaned to us and are not available this time. 

 

For me:  Ahhh...we just got back from a wedding...hot and chasing around two year old twins is exhausting now at 27 weeks.  My sister had the audacity to tell me how hard it was to pick up my girls due to her really full belly from such yummy food.  Really?!?  What about my really full belly from two babies and a lot of food?!!!  Yes, I told her I had no sympathy!  Now I am contracting some and so will go drink lots of water and put my feet up!  :)


Married 2002.  Di-di twin girls 2010.  Mono-di twin girls 2012.

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#97 of 448 Old 08-13-2012, 03:02 AM
 
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Adaline'sMama: You can update the genders of my twins on the main page. We found out a few weeks ago that we are having two boys. :)

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#98 of 448 Old 08-13-2012, 07:24 AM
 
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Now I love you all a little more for nerding out with me. :) I truly don't care whether my little guys are identical or not, but I'm still so curious!

 

ifnotnowwhen, congratulations on your boys! Welcome to the club. (Psst, Adaline's Mama, somehow I missed your awesome intro post. It is, for the record, awesome.)

 

adorkable, count me as another CDer who agrees with you. I know, that sounds weird. The deal is, with DS I decided I wnated to give CDs a try for health/cost/enviro reasons, but I promised myself that if it made me crazy, I would stop. Well, it went great, once I figured out which dipes worked for us. My washer/dryer are literally a meter away from his changing area, so it was super easy to just toss 'em in there and wash. We did use disposables here and there, for travel, for caregivers who just preferred them, etc. Of course, DS could not care less about being wet, so he wasn't bothered by that aspect...ALAS, nor did it help us out in the toilet learning department. We didn't have any leak issues, even at night, and he never got rashy. This time around, since I have a stash (I'll need to add some though) and we are on a tighter budget AND I am experienced with CDing, I feel that I really need to do it. I feel less of that "it's okay to do whatever works" approach. I priced disposables for two (Costco case) and yeesh. But if money was no object, this is something I would be really open to letting go of with twins. I think some of the "dirty secrets" of CDing are ones that you mentioned - CDs are not ever going to be as absorbent, so you have to change more often; they often don't fit under baby clothes, especially onesies; and if you're not mindful of it, you could end up spending about the same as disposables. The closures on my main dipes are worn out and I need to replace them, which is annoying. I mean, the whole point is to be able to reuse them with more than one child. QMTwins, thank you for that reminder that we could use disposables at night if we need to - that's a good point. I really do think it'll be okay and if it's not I'm sure we'll figure out something. Bascially I think CDing is a great thing but certainly not worth losing sleep over. EBFing I am okay with losing sleep over...CDing not. 

 

So I still can't figure out when I am having BH/contrax - never could with DS either. Is it that I'm mistaking them for the babies' movements?


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#99 of 448 Old 08-13-2012, 05:14 PM
 
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Ifnotnowwhen--congratulations on your boys!

About cds---i am.planning on cding the twins, just for cost factor. I part time cded my dd but used disposables for ds until recently. When i found out about the twins i decided i needed to be DONE buying sposies since i would be buying many of them with three in diapers, plus the fact that i have all.of dds old ones. He has a wicked diaper rash right now (grrrrr) so i am temporarily back in disposablea until.it clears up.

Well....it is a long story, but i.am done with my ob as of today. I spent all morning on the phone fighting for a referral to the mfm to no avail. Through a stroke of luck i discovered that my pcp's secretary is a mother of twins( she totally understood why i was so worked up) and she gave me the name of the drs/practice she used and was very happy with. I had to physically go to the origjnal obs office to sign a paper to release me medical records and i also picked up a copy for myself just in case they don't get faxed (the new practice will not even schedule me for an appointment until they have the records). The records are so amazingly non-descript. It does say "twins" in a couple places, but that is the full extent of any mention of it (there is way more detail about my vagina and clitoris...seriously!) (No mention of chorionicity or anything technical. Literally "twins moving as expected for ga during u/s". I am really hoping thag the new practice will see this and understand my concern and have me in asap. If not i don't know what i will do, because there are not a whole lot of other options (i live in a small rural town. The mfm that the originalnob was planning to refer me to is 2 hours away. The new practice allegedly deal.with lots of.twins +there is a mfm practice they work with. New practice=30 minutes away...so assuming it goes well, i am good. I feel a billion times better now that i am doing as much as i possibly can and if WILL all work.out.
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#100 of 448 Old 08-13-2012, 06:35 PM
 
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Lilys:  I'm glad you are transferring.  Hopefull all will go smoothly now.  I'm just waiting to find out their chorionicity!  I just can't understand why they would not refer you to MFM.  Some folks go to only an MFM/perinatologist for twins.  There should be no reason not to.  Good luck!


Married 2002.  Di-di twin girls 2010.  Mono-di twin girls 2012.

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#101 of 448 Old 08-13-2012, 07:00 PM
 
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They outright refused to refer me.prior to 20w!!!! Even though i said i was concerned about rhe chorionicity and the fact thay it has not been establishes (probably sounded like i was speaking chinese)The mfm place refused to see me without a referral. My pcp would not give me a referral either (since i am not in her care and also i suspect politics) . It even says on the records that i will go to the mfm @20 w. for a/s and to establish perinatal care if needed. I really REALLY hope that any dr/practice that know even a tiny bit about twins would see this as an issue, especially in light of the fact that there is NOTHING about the chorionicity there (i think that they are monoamniotic based on 1. all the ultrasounds i.looked at online and the fact that what i saw looked like the monochorionic ones and b) the fact that at appt #1 he said he thought they were ID and at appt #2 he said it looked like one big placenta. Not even going go mention AGAIN the fact that at appt # after saying he thought they were ID he said he dis not see a membrane. All things point to majorly inept. It would be fine if he were inept and realized it and sent me elsewhere, but to act like he knows what he is doing is basically infuriating.
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#102 of 448 Old 08-14-2012, 07:45 AM
 
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lilysmom, assuming you are in the US and you have a health insurance carrier that requires referrals, I would do the following: call the MFM's office and ask to speak to the person who handles insurance and see if they can advise; if they can't help, call the insurance company and ask how to appeal the decision (state that your twins share a placenta). My health insurance offers case management for women carrying twins (a RN who is assigned to follow you during your pg) and part of their job is to help you with these situations, because the insurance company is really interested in preventing complications. Mine always asks me about access to prenatal care and whether anything is preventing me from getting care I feel I need. I switched carriers in the middle of my pg and both had this type of program, but I don't know if all do (and we have a choice plan, not an HMO). If you are outside the US and working with a national healthcare system, I'd call a private doctor and ask what the cost is/payment plan for an ultrasound and consult to determine chorionicity. (But where I'm from, private doctors, while pricey, are not as insanely costly as what they bill in the US.) If everyone continues to be uncooperative, I'd also ask the doctor's office for a letter in writing with their recommendation not to diagnose until 20w, pointedly stating that you need to show it to your insurance carrier and/or lawyer. Sorry about the continued frustration. It really is unbelievable. My experience has really been the opposite, fighting to get out of certain types of monitoring.intervention, not having to beg for basic services!


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#103 of 448 Old 08-14-2012, 09:06 AM
 
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Gozal---THANK YOU!!!!!! That is really helpful! It is the mfm that is requiring the referral, not the insurance. The insurance said that as long as the practice does not require a referral i can self refer. But i cannot get a referral from anyone. I did get an appointment at the new practice to see a cnm next week. Not ideal, but the earliest they would get me in to see an ob was next month (despite my repeated insistence that they need to establish chorionicity and the earlier the better)...so i figured maybe the cnm can help me advocate for myself. (I am in the us and i have never had to fight like this for anything. My insurance is pretty awesome, but it is the doctors offices causing all this, not insurance). The new practice has cnms, obs and a perinatologist on staff..so i am really really hoping they are not inept also once i finally get seen. On the worlds most nondescript medical.records (from old ob. ..i got a copy just in case) it says "twins" and alao.it says that i will be going to "Portland(the town with mfm practice 2 hours away) @20 w to establish perinatal care if needed". My dh also thinks the insurance may be able to.step.in and do something, so calling them.is my next step. Thank you for offering your advice and insight....i am a mess right now because i feel.like nobody is.listening to.me.at.all and i am working really hard to advocate for myself+babies and i juat keep hitting brick walls (yesterday when i called the mfm office they suggested getting a referral from.my primary care dr if the ob refused, but the pcp.refused as well b/c she is not seeing me for the pregnancy)(nor will she as she no.longer does prenatal.care).
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#104 of 448 Old 08-14-2012, 09:39 AM
 
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Lilysmama, i really feel for you, its so hard when you feel like your the only done paying attention!

 

if i were you i would take the "scare the hell out of them" approach.

 

i would sit down and write a official letter stating that you know that more needs to be done to establish chronicity and that this need to be done early in order to protect your pregnancy and your babies from any number of risky scenarios. (i really dont mean to scare you or anyone but i would really talk up all the risks big time here) i would list our 3-5 of the scariest sounds risks and also the most common one they may have heard of.

 

I would then state very clearly that if any of these things are caught to later than preferred because of their failure to refer you that you will be discussing it with your layer as to any negligence or malpractice being demonstrated.

 

i would also in the letter ask for in writing a official letter from the doctor stating why he would not referral you to a MFM as per your request, giving the medical reasoning for denying your request (if he still refusing, i doubt big tim that he would!)

 

i would CC the following people (and show the CC at bottom the letter so that everyone knows all the rest of the folks who got it)

 

  • the doctor in question
  • his risk manager 
  • is he works in a network, find the regional risk manager or something like that. his office reports to someone, find out who
  • your insurance
  • possibly your PCM

 

if you have a layer, list them by name, heck have them send it on their letterhead if you wish to go that far.

 

 

 

 

 

 im not about suing people, but i do come from a long line of layers and have found that too many people think they have power over you, that really dont.

 

 he is working for you and has a responsibility to explain and stand by his decisions.  getting medical care is should not be a case of "they let me" or "they allowed me". but they have been bulling folks for a long time and it suits them well, take a stand and make it clear you know you have rights and you will be calling the shots.  respect that they have the training, but they need to explain then and be held accountable to that training. being respectful does not mean talking their advice without question.

 

 

 

go get them!


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#105 of 448 Old 08-14-2012, 10:17 AM
 
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I'm still trying to figure out a lot of these abbreviations. What does MFM stand for? and what is chorionicity? 


Stay at home wife and mommy to four beautiful girls Ashlyn (3.5), Sydney (2), and identical twins Cambrie and Acacia (6 months)   twins.gif

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#106 of 448 Old 08-14-2012, 11:03 AM
 
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MFM = Maternal & Fetal Medicine Specialist,  someone who specialized in complex pregnancies 

 

Chorionicity = The degree of separation of the twins in utero depends on if and when they split into two zygotes. Dizygotic twins were always two zygotes. Monozygotic twins split into two zygotes at some time very early in the pregnancy. The timing of this separation determines the chorionicity and amniocity (the number of sacs) of the pregnancy. Dichorionic twins either never divided (i.e.: were dizygotic) or they divided within the first 4 days. Monoamnionic twins divide after the first week.

 

(in normal pregnacies, we always hear about the amniotic sac, so tons of folks dont even know there is always two sacs around a baby!)


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#107 of 448 Old 08-14-2012, 11:05 AM
 
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i would suggest that greg reading can be found on Twins on Wikipedia, i have found this entry to be very complete and very factual over the 3 years i have referenced it again and again.

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#108 of 448 Old 08-15-2012, 11:20 AM
 
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Hi Everyone-

 

just dropping in because I'm reading/lurking a lot but not replying much.. feel free to PM me if you want more photos (as some requested) I post a lot to my flickr feed. 


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#109 of 448 Old 08-16-2012, 06:47 AM
 
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Hello.

Is anyone using a belly band or some type of support?

My partner is 24 weeks and starting to feel a lot of lower back strain and hip and pelvic pain. The doctor suggested getting a dsupport band/belt. 

Is there one that is best, good stretch for twin pregnancies, doesn't just ride up and get annoying?

 

Thanks.


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#110 of 448 Old 08-16-2012, 06:49 AM
 
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Also, about diapers.

We used cloth with our DD and plan to do it again with the twins. 

 

For the first few months we did a diaper service. It costs about the same or a little cheaper than disposables. And we didn't have to deal with those really messy liquid poo diapers. 

Then we went to doing our own with pre-folds and covers. 

We have some fitted. 

 

With twins, I plan on doing a load of diapers every night and another load or two of clothes a day. 

 

Currently, we do all of our laundry on the weekend. 


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#111 of 448 Old 08-16-2012, 08:32 AM
 
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Thanks adorkable! I have been reading all your suggestions and have started (mentally) working on a letter. I have an appointment one week from.today with a cnm at a completely different practice (they have many obs, cnms, and mfms on staff). Not idea that it is a cnm, BUT i.could.not see the ob for a month. I am hoping that they have a normal knowledge of what should be happening once she "discovers" that i have twins and i get referred right away to mfm. I also now have an appointment scheduled for 20w with the original mfm (i am thinking maybe now that ihave been officially referred that i can.push to have the date moved up). Yesterday at my nt scan that did not happen (babies were measuring 14w4d) the tech determined one placenta for sure and she also visualized the membrane, (which makes me very happy).

I have calmed down so much about it all, maybe just because knowing for a fact that they are mono-di (even though i am technically the only one who really knows, since the tech doesn't count) means at least i KNOW SOMETHING for sure. I also am happy that tbey were measuring the exact same size and she checked a bunch of other stuff too and everything looked good so far). I know ttts is still a risk, but at this exact moment in time i am good and my babies are good.
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#112 of 448 Old 08-16-2012, 08:47 AM
 
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LM, wonderful news, you sound like you are in great hands... yours


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#113 of 448 Old 08-16-2012, 11:12 AM
 
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cols I used one mostly from 28-38w of my twin pregnancy when I was standing all day or hiking/walking and it made a big difference in terms of my comfort and energy and back pain etc.. it was the Gabrialla Maternity Support Band (on amazon is where I purchased it) and I wore it the last few weeks pretty much every day all day until I went to bed- I am normally a size 2/4 and found it did not ride up and helped a lot- I didnt wear one with my singletons but found I really needed it with my twins (but maybe it had to do more with chasing a toddler around.. I dont know.. )
 


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#114 of 448 Old 08-16-2012, 01:43 PM
 
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Hey all. We had an u/s today with a specialist and it was determined today they are NOT conjoined, but ARE monoamniotic. They were measuring right on track and had good heartbeats.

Wow. I guess this might actually happen....

Married to one of the last good guys left Jim
Mom to AJ 4/07 and Genevieve 5/09

And then: I'm really, really tired of making angels.

But wait, could it really be true?


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#115 of 448 Old 08-16-2012, 04:19 PM
 
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Since I introduced myself earlier, I thought I had better post an update. I'm now 27 weeks. I had an ultrasound about 3 weeks ago. We saw only one baby, and the tech, nor anyone else, seemed/seems to have any idea what I was hearing with my fetoscope. The tech told me that there is, of course, still a chance that there is a twin in there, but that it is just much smaller. But I have nearly convinced myself that there is just one. I almost went ahead and upped everything, but I decided not to, unless my midwife has a reason to suspect that I should (my next appointment is a week from today). Part of me can't shake that feeling that there is a twin, and I don't know if it's because of something real or because I had been so convinced already. Guess I'll find out for certain at the birth. ;-) So, anyway, I'll probably just continue lurking occassionally. And if there really is more than one after I give birth, you'll all certainly hear about it!
 

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#116 of 448 Old 08-17-2012, 04:12 AM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Xerxella View Post

Hey all. We had an u/s today with a specialist and it was determined today they are NOT conjoined, but ARE monoamniotic. They were measuring right on track and had good heartbeats.
Wow. I guess this might actually happen....

Bolt.gifWhhhhaaaatttttt????  That's great news.... Why must I stalk to find this out?  Bolt.gif


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#117 of 448 Old 08-17-2012, 06:54 AM - Thread Starter
 
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lily- great news! Keep us updated about that appointment :)

 

x- whew! Im so glad for you :)

 

ahomebirthmama- scary to know that an ultrasound could possibly miss a twin at 27 weeks!

 

 

 

Im anxious about my appointment on Monday morning. We are at 15 weeks now, but somehow I still expect there to not really be two babies in there, so I always fear the worst. I broke down last week and checked with my doppler and heard two clear hearbeats, so Im pretty sure everything is okay. We are leaving DD with a sitter so that we can see the ultrasound together, since this is the gender reveal ultrasound. Who knows, maybe we'll even make an announcement about the twins once we know!


Holly and David partners.gif

Adaline love.gif (3/20/10), and Charlie brokenheart.gif (1/26/12- 4/10/12) and our identical  rainbow1284.gif  twins Callie and Wendy (01/04/13)

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#118 of 448 Old 08-17-2012, 12:45 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Xerxella View Post

Hey all. We had an u/s today with a specialist and it was determined today they are NOT conjoined, but ARE monoamniotic. They were measuring right on track and had good heartbeats.
Wow. I guess this might actually happen....


That's great news!!

 

Adaline'sMama - I can totally relate to that anxiety. Will be thinking of you Monday morning!


Megan - SortaCrunchy mama to blahblah.gif Dacey (7) and energy.gif Aliza Joy (5). Expecting mo-di twin boys baby.gifbaby.gif February 2013!

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#119 of 448 Old 08-17-2012, 05:46 PM
 
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Originally Posted by Milk8shake View Post

Quote:
Originally Posted by Xerxella View Post

Hey all. We had an u/s today with a specialist and it was determined today they are NOT conjoined, but ARE monoamniotic. They were measuring right on track and had good heartbeats.

Wow. I guess this might actually happen....
Bolt.gif Whhhhaaaatttttt????  That's great news.... Why must I stalk to find this out?  Bolt.gif

You love to stalk and you know it. orngtongue.gif I'll go update you on Facebook now....

Married to one of the last good guys left Jim
Mom to AJ 4/07 and Genevieve 5/09

And then: I'm really, really tired of making angels.

But wait, could it really be true?


The whole story at: www.xerxella.blogspot.com
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#120 of 448 Old 08-20-2012, 09:19 AM
 
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Adaline'sMama- I'm feeling the same way. I have my first official appointment tomorrow and I'm nervous they will only find one. I think a lot has to do with the fact that i'm not feeling as sick or as tired as I imagined I would with twins. Praying and hoping for the best though! Will know more tomorrow.


Stay at home wife and mommy to four beautiful girls Ashlyn (3.5), Sydney (2), and identical twins Cambrie and Acacia (6 months)   twins.gif

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