We're considering trying to add another baby to our family. If I had a single baby, I think I would have tried for a 2-year spacing, to let the first baby be a baby and let myself recover, yet have them be close together. Which would mean getting pregnant again this fall. But as that time comes, I can't imagine dealing with 2 toddlers and an infant. But of course, if I wait until I think the girls are ready, there will be a 9-month lead time (at least...plus time to get pregnant). Which means they would be even *further* apart.
So...those of you who have kids after your multiples, when did you feel things were calmed down enough to handle another baby?
I got pregnant with little sister when my boys turned two. Husband didn't prefer to have the kids far apart in age, and felt the near 3 year spacing was ideal. I agreed.
Some thoughts: I really felt like I didn't have the "courage" to get out with the boys alone right when they were at the more flexible 2's. I was burdened with the pregnancy and spent a lot of time at home, or the library. But we didn't venture out to the museum, or zoo, much alone. I think I would have been more adventureous if I hadn't been pregnant.
The boys were potty training right when when I was getting very large with the pregnancy. I wanted them out of diapers before the baby came, and that didn't quite happen.
On the other hand, they boys still rested/napped when I was needing naps with the pregnancy. WHile it was difficult to have 3 under 3 for the first few months, they are at the perfect age spacing now. They play well together, and the boys really don't remember a time without little sister. We have almost zero sibling rivalry.
I did need someone to help with the boys when I came home with little sister for the first few days (I was recovering from a c-section).
In a "make your life easier" kind of way, if you don't have a great twin stroller, invest in one. I purchased a jogging twin stroller with an optional swivel wheel position, and it made all the difference in my freedom. I could actually walk for exercise, push the twins and sling the baby. It was the best twin purchase I'd made in years. I'd had a twin umbrella stroller, but this actually made exercise possible agian.
And on a personal note, I knew when my boys were born that I wanted another baby. I wanted a single baby experience if possible. It was really nice having just one-- nursing was easy, and much more flexible. I could actually co-sleep without taking turns with who was in the bed. It was such a different experience than the twins, which was a lot of fun, too: just very different.
Thank you. That's almost exactly what I was hoping to hear. We do have a twin stroller. We use it every day.
I'm with you on the wanting the single baby experience. And loving the idea of taking the double stroller with the new baby in the sling. And I'm glad that spacing is working for you; we're thinking of starting to try when the girls are about two. Glad to hear this seems right when they're a little older.
I found out I was pregnant just after my girls' first birthday and I am finding it overwhelming to be be hugely pregnant (nearly 34 weeks now) with two 18 month olds. We were also hoping for the single baby experience, but are having twins again (which is also wonderful! - but overwhelming). I think that 3 years would be ideal, though of course these things are not always the way we plan them!
I do wonder if my experience would be different if I weren't expecting twins again. Having a "high risk" pregnancy, plus the double everything that comes with a twin pregnancy (exhaustion, morning sickness, heartburn, hormones, being huge) has made this a difficult pregnancy compounded by having two toddlers to look after. I'm not sure what the *best* timing is but mine will be 20 months apart and while I think this is awesome in some ways, we would have planned for a bigger gap to make things a little easier on ourselves :)
Married to my love since 08/12/10, mama to E 04/06/01 and twin girls M and Z 01/08/11
We are a family! Expecting #4 and #5 in September - what a surprise!
I found out I was pregnant again when the boys were about 18 months or so. They were also starting to toilet train around the time I had no energy to deal with it, so I missed the window and tried again later when I had the energy. There is a 27 month gap between the twins and their sister. I also just gave birth 4 months ago to another baby boy. There is 30 months between her and the little one. So for about 4 months I had 4 under 5, which was fun! All of them pretty much play nicely together and it's great. The 2.5 year old thinks she's 5, and it's so nice to see her running after her brothers and copying them and having them slow down and include her. Our second pregnancy also started out as twins and just didn't develop which in a way is good because our daughter has some mild special needs which makes it harder in a way. I was not expecting to get pregnant so soon, but we are not always in control of that :-). I like the 2 year spacing between them all, they are growing up together.
: wife to James, MoM to R and D (Aug 2007) and E (Nov 2009) and Y (April 2012)
we are pregnant again, with twins, following twins. The girls will be 2.5 when this next set is born. We just wanted one more and we are getting 2 more. I think the difference will be good...they won't ever remember life without all of them. I'm happy to have them close in age. Working on a quad stroller though, because I just will need to leave the house by myself!
Married 2002. Di-di twin girls 2010. Mono-di twin girls 2012.
Our twins are 16 months older (to the day) than their little brother. That might've been a bit close, but I love having them close together, and I'm sure that when they get older and more independent (they are 3, 3, and 21 months now), I will be glad I had them so close. Of course, I have to survive first...
Wife to 1 since 2000
Mom to 6 ('01), ('02), ('07), ('09), ('09), ('10)
This second year has actually been way harder than the first year. But I wouldn't have it any other way, they are all so close and have so much fun together. And my little one wants to be JUST like the twins, especially her sister! She mimics her all day, every day. Which means she has already been potty trained for months!