Moms who are pregnant or have had more kids? - Mothering Forums

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#1 of 7 Old 07-12-2004, 11:34 PM - Thread Starter
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I have two 26 month-olds (B/G twins) and am 9 weeks pregnant (we confirmed on sono what I suspected from the get go -- "just one" this time!). We spaced the kids so they'd be almost 3 years apart (2 years 9 months to be exact), which seems do-able as dd and ds are already so easy compared to the baby and early toddler days.

I thought it would be great to share stories from other moms who had twins and then went on to have other children. What was it like? How were your pregnancies different? Labors? Deliveries? Nursing? The early days?

On the one hand I feel old hat at this mothering thing, but on the other hand there are experiences that will be a first for me... like having a pregnancy not viewed as "high risk" with all the monitoring and stress that entails... initiating breastfeeding (my dd and ds were born early and so I initiatied lactation with a breastpump before my LC helped me teach them how to nurse around a month old)... taking care of a newborn AND two other children while exhausted and sore from delivery (again, my two were in the NICU so by the time they came home I was pretty much healed), and OF COURSE the most important one: how to still be there for dd and ds while caring for a newborn/baby. It's mostly this last concern that makes me think our experiences as twin (and triplet?) moms may be unique since having a 5 year old a 2 year old and a newborn is an entirely different thing than having two toddlers (or two at any age really) AND a newborn!

On the other hand, this is going to feel like a piece of cake!!!

And I don't have to buy a single thing!!

And dd and ds are so interested in babies now, I'm sure they'll get into it once we tell them. I also think it will be wonderful for dd and ds to have the experience of having a sibling other than their twin.
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#2 of 7 Old 07-14-2004, 07:51 PM
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Well - I hope someone comes along that has your situaiton. Mine was a little different. I had 3 children first and then twins. One of the positives is my older children don't depend on just me for everything. They also play with and amuse each other. When I added my 3rd child - I had a 13 month old and a 27 month old. The negative side of this was those 2 got into a LOT of mischief while I was nursing or caring for the baby. So there are ups and downs.

I do think age 2 almost 3 is a great age to add another baby. It was harder dealing with one year olds when a new baby comes because they don't understand at all esp about being gentle or about needing to wait so mommy can take care of the baby. In fact with twins (and even with closesly spaced sibs) - they will already be used to taking turns and sharing your attention then if you just had one older one.

It is hard to take care of a newborn (or in my case 2 newborns and 3 older children all under age 5 this past time!) when you are still sore and exhausted. But you'll do the best you can and get through it. It's so wonderful to watch the older ones interact with the babies. Mine are all just so in love with the babies and so protective. They fight over who gets to "play with the babies" since there are 2 babies to share between 3 older sibs. So you may run into that too with twins and only ONE baby brother or sister! LOL.

So congratulations on your pregnancy!

single mama to 5 (12.5, 11, 10, and 8 year old twins)

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#3 of 7 Old 07-17-2004, 06:09 PM
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I have b/g twins too, and their younger brother was born exactly 3 years after the twins' due date. ( They were born 11 weeks early though)
I found it was a lot easier the 2nd time round, I can clearly remember thinking 'Thank goodness I don't have to change another nappy/ feed another baby now!' I luxuriated in the intimacy of just having one baby to cuddle, after spending a lot of time feeling guilty about not giving each twin all the time and cuddles they needed.
As for the twins' reaction, they were wonderfrul, very loving towards the baby, with no jealousy shown. I think it may have been partly because they never had me all to themselves, and were used to sharing me.
The twins are now 6 years old, and their brother is 3. We are unschooling all of them, and really enjoy their company. They all get along really well ( most of the time!) and I don't find the twins shut him out of any play, nor that they are closer to each other emotionally than to their brother.
Of course, you still get the sleepless nights, the terrible days when nothing goes right, but, looking back, I wouldn't have it any other way.
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#4 of 7 Old 07-17-2004, 06:16 PM
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I just re-read your post (I seem to always reply without reading properly!)
My preganancy was very similar to the first one, with the glaring exception that Caleb was born at 37 weeks, rather than 29 weeks. I had terrible morning sickness and BHC's with both, so, like you, I had a scan very early, just to make sure there was only one.
The twins were born via emergency Caesarian, Caleb was delivered naturally, with an epidural. He was feeding 30 minutes after his birth, it all went so beautifully. With the twins, I didn't even express milk for 24 hours, so I was very lucky, in hindsight, to have bf them for 2 years, about the same as I fed Caleb.
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#5 of 7 Old 07-17-2004, 06:47 PM
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It was 8 years (minus 6 weeks) between my twins and my singleton. I think that's a GREAT age gap! I don't know what I'm going to do with a 3-year old and a newborn this time. : Anyway, I found that my pregnancy with Alec, while hard to get through, was still MUCH easier than the twin pregnancy. Once he was born, though, I realized that having one baby is HARD! I thought that it was the fact that they were twins that made it so hard, turns out it's that they were BABIES that made it hard. Does that make sense? I don't like that Alec depends on me so much to play with him; I didn't realize how nice it was that Maggie and Kate would, if not play with each other, at least keep each other company. Not that I don't enjoy spending time with him, but playing Little People and cars can only be fun for so long, you know?

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#6 of 7 Old 07-22-2004, 08:53 PM
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My (b/g) twins are 2 yrs 11 mos older than my last. I think it's a good spacing and I think after twins one baby feels so easy. The twins keep getting older and that keeps making things easier too. Three little ones are tough though. It has been virtually impossible to go out with all of them up until very recently as they really would go in different directions at once and I had to follow them and tote baby along too. (I also have an older homeschooling dd )

The twins were early, perfectly healthy, but born in the hospital and I had to be very defensive while in labor instead of "into it" my others were born @ home. I had to forbid them from doing an episiotomy and refuse to pee in a bedpan but we didn't even know it was twins so they left me alone for labor!! Yay! (Long story there) We also had full rooming in and went home after four days--what a relief. But it was tough to be in a hospital and this was dh's first birth and although it was acctually exciting it was somewhat disappointing not to have a homebirth.

My mother really could not believe we would consider having another child on purpose.

So dd4 was born at home before the midwife got there "in the caul" and we were so tickled--it was just dh and I. It was the relaxed kind of birth it seemed dh missed out on the first time. So that is very precious to us.

There was an overlap in diapering and for a while my days were full of poo and not much else. But it didn't last too long. We did not overlap nursing. I weaned while pregnant when the twins were about 27 mos old. I never have regretted that.

I like that the twins can play together and give each other some attention--it can be easier to focus on baby. And the baby is close enough in age that they can all play together now. This is great!

Dh got such good experience with twins--he has been so much more involved with them than he might have been with one. Because he was used to full participation it came naturally to be very involved with the baby. He really has enjoyed how much easier the baby is.

ME&treehugger.gifHE... loving our: wild.gifdd(18) ~~violin.gifds(13) read.gifdd(13)~~ peace.gifdd(10)

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#7 of 7 Old 07-24-2004, 08:54 AM
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Oh my goodness, I'm so excited for you that I couldn't even read the responses because I wanted to post my congratulations!!!

We got pregnant with our last when our boy/girl twins were about the same age as yours!!! We were also trying to space them 3 years apart and almost made it! (Sam was born in July and the twins are August babes so they were almost 3). The timing was great!!!

My last was so much easier then the twins!!! The twins were born at 31 weeks so they were somewhat sick. It was SO wonderful having a singleton and being able to nurse without complications and just hold the baby, etc. I love it!

My twins were great with the new baby!!! My dh kind of took care of the twins for the month he was off and I spent the time recovering (C-section) and getting the breastfeeding down with the new baby.

Well, now we're on baby #4 because we love it so much!!! My twins are almost 5 now and so excited about this baby! They'll be 5 when she comes and I think they're going to be a great help! My dd has so much fun getting the cloth diapers ready!!! (kid after my own heart- LOL) She even knows which ones are covers, which ones fitteds, etc. She's going to be a great big sister (to a baby sister- she's psyched!)

SAHMama to the "Fantastic Four"- 10 yr old b/g twins, 7 yr old boy, 5 yr old girl... : and expecting a miracle baby Feb. 2010...: Married for 11 yrs to my handsome Police Officer :cop:
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