CIO for twins? - Mothering Forums
Forum Jump: 
 
Thread Tools
#1 of 21 Old 09-29-2004, 04:02 PM - Thread Starter
 
bu's mama's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2004
Location: LI, NY
Posts: 2,917
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Hi there - I'm a mother to a singleton but an aunt to twins. First off, let me say that while I don't know what raising twins is like I do have an awful lot of respect for the moms that raise multiples. I have one friend that has 2 sets of twins 18 months apart & I can't even imagine how they do it.

Anyway, my neice & nephew will be a year the end of October & both my brother & sil have this expectation that they should be sleeping 12 hours straight through the night. My brother was complaining about how J will just sit in his crib & cry "Mamamamama" & I asked what happens when you pick him up - Well he stops. IMHO, I think, well he's telling you what he needs.

He also said, well it took a week but we let C cry when we put her down & now she's fine. She sleeps right through. My thought is poor girl, she just learned that her crying didn't matter.

My brother also said, well that's what all the other mothers in her multiples club told her to do also.

The only thing I say is I don't believe in letting a baby cry & leave it at that. They're not very ap & I don't want to come across as a know-it-all or criticize their parenting. I offer advice only when they ask for it. Our relationship isn't great as it is, probably more courteous (sp?) than close.

I do not know the stress of raising multiples, so I can't say I know how they feel, but in my heart I'm so against letting any baby CIO.

Sorry this is long & rambling, but I guess I need some opinions from parents of twins - did any of you use CIO? Did you feel like you had to? What was your experience if you didn't? Do mothers of singletons really have no idea of raising multiples?
bu's mama is offline  
#2 of 21 Old 09-29-2004, 05:13 PM
 
gotmilkmama's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2004
Location: St. Louis, MO
Posts: 208
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Wow! I feel sorry for those babes just reading your email! I have 3 mos girls and a 21 mos son. I could never let my singleton nor twins CIO. Besides wanting them to be as happy as possible...I could not mentally take listening to crying. My heart would just break. It's hard enough to listen to it now while one waits while I change another or bath another, etc. When it's just me and the 3 monkeys there is enough crying going on while I try to get each one settled, nursed, fed, asleep, etc. If it's me and dh then there is no excuse for letting them cry.

I feel so sad for those babies. I got alot of 'let him CIO' with my ds as he wanted to be nursed 3-4xs a night at age 1. I just couldn't see myself doing CIO. He already didn't want to sleep in our bed anymore so whatever time he needed during the night I gave him. Yes I was sleepy but aren't all mamas.

And now that I have my girls they sleep a bit better than ds but there are 2 of them obviously so of course I'm up much more.

I mean what kid sleeps 12hrs a night anyway!! I hear stories of these kind of babies but I just don't get it. My experience has been that babies need attention...day AND NIGHT! Crying is there ONLY form of communication. Do CIO parents not what to listen to their own children? To me CIO simply means ignore the most important thing in your life.

They may be surprised that if they tend to their needs during the night and their babies become happy and content and feel safe...one day they will surprise you and sleep thru the night. And come on...12 hrs. That's unheard of in my experience!

sorry for the rant! : I doubt you'll find many CIO fans here.
gotmilkmama is offline  
#3 of 21 Old 09-29-2004, 08:56 PM
 
emomama's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2004
Location: northern illinois
Posts: 213
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
i am sad for those babies too after reading all that... having twins is hard, there is no getting around that, and there will be some crying sometimes when there's not enough mama to go around but there are ways! and i don't think i know too many other 1 year-olds who are sleeping through the night, what with all the milestones happening and teeth and everything else.

i will say though, that it is supereasy to get frustrated, overwhelmed and just not know what else to try sometimes. i confess to doing CIO a couple of times before joining these boards... i knew in my gut that it wasn't the best way, but i just didn't know any better, y'know? do you think that if we all made suggestions, as mamas of twins who have BTDT, and you printed them up and gave them to her that they would be well-received? if you said something like, hey, i'm a part of this online community with some twin mamas and these are things they have tried when babies don't seem to want to go to bed... i don't know, it's just a thought. in my own experience, i was AP before i even knew what that was and i just needed a push in the right direction and that came from a lot of mamas here who don't even know it! maybe she just needs some new ideas.

as for my experience... bath, nursing, baby einstein musical video, stories... playing hard during the day so that they sleep longer at night... and NOT expecting them to sleep all night... co-sleeping of course is wonderful because you don't have to get up to nurse. i'm sure other mamas have had different experiences though!
emomama is offline  
#4 of 21 Old 09-30-2004, 12:19 PM
 
gotmilkmama's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2004
Location: St. Louis, MO
Posts: 208
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
That's a good idea jaime h! Printing up some ideas from other twin mamas for them. They may be more accepting to that.
gotmilkmama is offline  
#5 of 21 Old 09-30-2004, 02:57 PM - Thread Starter
 
bu's mama's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2004
Location: LI, NY
Posts: 2,917
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Thanks for the replies Carmella & Jamie. I think I just needed to have my feelings validated.

I totally agree about the 12 hours of sleep, but they think I'm the wacky, crunchy mama who still lets her 2yo sleep with her. I tried to give them the No Cry Sleep Solution, but they wanted somthing more immediate (imo) & got one of the sleep training books from their friends.

I get very upset & sad when I spend time with them & they're up visiting this week. For example, my brother & I were talking about the babes & he brought up the fact that they have two very different personalities - "C. is very independent, but J. is, I don't want to say he's a baby because he is, but he acts like a baby." :

My dd wasn't very into stuff - swings, bouncy seats, exersaucers, etc. so we hardly ever put her into them. She was slung most of the time & when they visited last Christmas I made dinner witn C. in the sling to try & show them that C liked it & it allowed you to do other things. They just weren't interested.

We went to visit them last Easter & at one point there were six adults in the house - me, dh, brother & sil, my mother & sil's mother - & they put the babies in the swings & then in the saucer. I tried to take them out & hold them as much as possible. Again, I understand that twins are tough & you need a safe place to put one down if you're tending to the other, but I get discourage that it's so accepted to just put them in something & then go about your life.

They tried for a long time to have a baby & they adore them, yet it's more about making the babies fit into their life than adjusting to life as a new family, if that makes any sense.

Jamie, that is a good idea & I'll try to get some ideas & responses together for them. They tend to do things by what is expected - that's what the doctor said, that's what the book said, etc. They started solids at 6 months because that's what the doctor told them, even though I don't think they were ready. It always seemed liked they were forcing the food on them for the first few weeks they were eating (though I do have my own food issues so that tends to disturb me).

I know this is long & a big vent so thanks for reading. I guess I feel I'm at a disadvantage when I try to discuss ap style things with them because they usually play the twins card (it's different when you have twins).

Thanks again.
bu's mama is offline  
#6 of 21 Old 09-30-2004, 05:41 PM
 
emomama's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2004
Location: northern illinois
Posts: 213
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
i totally understand! it is so hard sometimes to watch other parents when you know there's a better way... it always boggles my mind when i meet someone who has tried SO hard to have a baby and finally does and then they struggle fitting the baby into their lifestyle and when it doesn't happen, baby ends up in cribs, swings, playpens... it's hard for me sometimes to keep my mouth shut. :ignore

it IS different having twins... but it's different having a 3 mo old and a toddler or a five year old and a teenager, ykwim? you're still a mama so don't let them make you feel like your parenting instincts are invalid just because their babies came as a set! i totally confess to using a swing in the early days more than i wanted to, but i ALWAYS had a baby either slung or in my arms... it was not the norm for both of them to be in a chair or swing.

also, the time goes by so fast. i feel like i just brought my little ones home and as we speak, they're toddling around, playing cars and trucks on the floor by my feet. i would feel like the world's biggest fool right now if i had not spent every moment possible holding and loving on them while they were tiny... anyway, that's just my two cents.
emomama is offline  
#7 of 21 Old 09-30-2004, 05:49 PM
 
oohlalabags's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2004
Location: TX
Posts: 197
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
ugh ... just because there are 2 or more doesn't mean that they have to CIO! that makes me angry ... i have twins plus one more that's only 10 months older ... believe me there are times when i'm at my wits end especially if all 3 are sick and they wake up at different times of the night ... but CIO is not an option ... there are times when i just do not want to get up and i'll wait a minute to see if they will calm themselves but i think a minute was the longest i could hold out ... some people just don't get it ... sometimes i'm fed up and i do have to regroup sometimes .. my twins are 15 months now and one of my twins has been waking almost every 2 hours ... i think it's because of teething ... i do what i can to soothe him and go back to sleep ... i especially try to soothe him as fast as possible because he is so very loud and i wouldn't want his brothers to be waken by that ... i guess they keep them all seperate or something
oohlalabags is offline  
#8 of 21 Old 09-30-2004, 05:56 PM
 
oohlalabags's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2004
Location: TX
Posts: 197
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
i do what i can to soothe him and go back to sleep ... i especially try to soothe him as fast as possible because he is so very loud and i wouldn't want his brothers to be waken by that


oops i meant

i do what i can to soothe him back to sleep ... i especially try to soothe him as fast as possible because he is so very loud and i wouldn't want his brothers to be waken by that
oohlalabags is offline  
#9 of 21 Old 09-30-2004, 05:58 PM
 
amnesiac's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2001
Location: at the end of the longest line
Posts: 4,984
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Well, things are different when you have twins but really your parenting style is pretty much the same. I didn't sling my twins & I didn't bf either. But we did have a big family blanket & pillow area in the living room where we all lounged, played etc most of the day, every day. And some days when I was feeling really rough, I did let them cry for 10 minutes or so while I tried to regain some tiny bit of calmness.

But I guess the main issue for you is to somehow find peace with the fact that their parenting style is so different from yours & they aren't interested in making any changes. I really have no suggestions about that except to just not discuss it with them.
amnesiac is offline  
#10 of 21 Old 10-01-2004, 01:24 PM - Thread Starter
 
bu's mama's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2004
Location: LI, NY
Posts: 2,917
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Thanks again...I think what I needed to hear is that it is more a parenting choice than something they *need* to do.

I think my sil would be more ap, but she is easily swayed by what's in the book, what the doctor tells her or what her friends tell her. I'm the normal one & she's around 50 other not-so-ap mamas.

It is hard because they do ask for my opinion & I don't want to sound condescending or arrogant (I don't think I do, but like I said our relationship isn't great). I just try to say I disagree & if they want more info I'd be glad to share it with them.

Like anything else, there's underlying issues. I think we all had the expectation that having children around the same age would bring us closer & it seems to just point out more of the differences.

Thanks for the input ladies!
bu's mama is offline  
#11 of 21 Old 10-01-2004, 02:05 PM
 
amnesiac's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2001
Location: at the end of the longest line
Posts: 4,984
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Quote:
I think we all had the expectation that having children around the same age would bring us closer & it seems to just point out more of the differences.
Isn't that funny how that tends to happen? I have one friend who parents A LOT different than me but it doesn't effect our friendship, we just do our own thing. But then there are others who are totally wierded out by things I do & I am totally yukked out by some of the things they do to the point that we really have no desire to even hang out like we used to.
amnesiac is offline  
#12 of 21 Old 10-23-2004, 10:54 PM
 
Periwinkle's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2003
Posts: 9,162
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
No CIO. Ever. The fact that "twins" is an excuse for poor parenting really makes me sad. I see that all the time with people I know who have twins and this is the #1 reason why I quit my MOMs club -- kids who spend their lives in side-by-side baby swings (no, not that swings are bad all the time, but I literally mean their bottles get propped and they eat in their swing, nap in their swing, play in their swing, etc., etc.). Everyone would always act like the fact that they had two babies made this OK, not even attempting to feel bad about it or find another solution in any way.
Periwinkle is offline  
#13 of 21 Old 10-24-2004, 02:29 AM
 
JoDoula's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2003
Location: Nevada
Posts: 43
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Your post made me so sad! You are a good and caring Auntie. I echo what so many great mamas have said. I liked what Jamie said..sometimes there is crying when there is not enough mama to go around, but certainly not CIO! I have 4 kids, and although my older boys are pretty independent, I never even thought of letting my babies CIO. They are 15 months now, and every night we lie on my bed and they nurse to sleep for about 45 min. DO they sleep through the night??? Heck no! They wake up about 2 times each, and there is a big amen for the family bed. I can imagine how hard it is with them being so mainstream. I think the world is teaching so many families, that nurturing equals spoiling, and not to let your baby "control" them. Sounds so Ezzo ( babywise) and may be coming from their Ped. I hardly had anything in duplicate for our babies, and we did have one swing and a bouncer that occasionally got used. What is wrong with holding your babies or floor time? This seemed to drive others nuts, that we did not have a bunch of baby stuff in two's. Really... All you can do is slide in little bits of wisdom.

Here is mine. Love your babies all day long. they grow up way to fast. SURRENDER to the fact that you have babies that need you and it may be years before they are ready to be independent enough to go to sleep on their own. It is all about selflessness. Babies communicate through crying, etc... they need to be able to trust us as parents that we will take care of them, and comfort them when they need it. Babies can not manipulate. Those that are nurtured are well rounded happy babies who trust parents and respond to that. The first years are tough, but well worth the investment of your time, little sleep, and lots of love. My babies at 15 months still wake up two times each, and we have a family bed, so that way my sleep is barely inmterrupted. I often wonder as adults how we would feel if we were sad, hurt etc.. and kept calling our husbands name, and they just left us alone and upset? How do we then think an infant feels? Breaks my heart!

So, I rambled.. I hope there is something good in there that you can use. My heart literally breaks for any baby left to CIO.
JoDoula is offline  
#14 of 21 Old 10-24-2004, 04:49 PM
 
charmarty's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2002
Location: desperately seeking SPELLCHECK!!
Posts: 4,972
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
You could try to give them books that are for gentle night time parenting. Like The No Cry Sleep Solution. And Dr JAy has one out too. Those poor babies
charmarty is offline  
#15 of 21 Old 10-25-2004, 01:53 AM
 
resimom's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2004
Posts: 509
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
our twins are #4 and 5. they do have to cio some. there are times that there just isn't enough of me.

for instance, one does have to cio if the other needs a diaper changed. there have also been times when one falls and i put down the nursing one to check on the injured one and the one that got put down has to cio until i can make it back. i have also had to let them cio to go to the bathroom. that makes me feel really bad because it is for a selfish reason. i find myself trying to wait to pee until they will be put down happily but sometimes i just have to go. if i obsess over it i can certainly get very upset that they are cheated in many ways because they came in a set. i have to focus on the good stuff about them having each other or i will drive myself crazy.

if her babies have to cio because she is not supermom then i empathize with her. it is so hard to meet all their needs all the time.
resimom is offline  
#16 of 21 Old 10-25-2004, 10:53 AM
 
oohlalabags's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2004
Location: TX
Posts: 197
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Quote:
Originally Posted by resimom
our twins are #4 and 5. they do have to cio some. there are times that there just isn't enough of me.

for instance, one does have to cio if the other needs a diaper changed. there have also been times when one falls and i put down the nursing one to check on the injured one and the one that got put down has to cio until i can make it back. i have also had to let them cio to go to the bathroom. that makes me feel really bad because it is for a selfish reason. i find myself trying to wait to pee until they will be put down happily but sometimes i just have to go. if i obsess over it i can certainly get very upset that they are cheated in many ways because they came in a set. i have to focus on the good stuff about them having each other or i will drive myself crazy.

if her babies have to cio because she is not supermom then i empathize with her. it is so hard to meet all their needs all the time.
I don't think those situations are true CIO ...
oohlalabags is offline  
#17 of 21 Old 10-29-2004, 09:11 PM - Thread Starter
 
bu's mama's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2004
Location: LI, NY
Posts: 2,917
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Thanks for the additional replies - they came at a good time. They're all up this weekend to have the twins' first birthday party & it always gets a bit stressful since the differences in our parenting are quite abundant!

I think it's more the choice to *let* them cio than out of any sort of need - like having to tend to the other baby or going to the bathroom (I think resimom said when there's not enough mom to go around). They made a conscious choice as to what they would do.

The other part that makes it difficult is that my mother agrees with them, although she does her best to say she's neutral : . I find it more frustrating that she pretends to agree with me than just to say I don't agree. But alas that's a whole other issue .
bu's mama is offline  
#18 of 21 Old 11-01-2004, 12:28 PM
 
CherylE's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2003
Location: British Columbia, Canada
Posts: 399
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
I think she's talking about CIO so they will learn to sleep 12 hours through the night - not fussing for a bit until mama get get to them.

I know my babies have had to fuss a lot more than my older children just because I can't do everything at once. But we don't just fed them and put them in the cribs at night and leave them there until morning. Though my girls are sleeping in cribs now.

Also I found swing, exersaucer, bouncy chair - way more necessary with two babies. But I also didn't get two of everything. Babies were so refluxy in the beginning that they couldn't sleep with me or even nurse lying down. I would nurse them and then put them into the bouncy seat or baby rocker. But I slept right next to them. It's only been recently - that the babies had "floor time" during the day when my older 3 are up because it was too dangerous to put tiny babies on the floor with the older kids. They had to get big enough first.

single mama to 5 (12.5, 11, 10, and 8 year old twins)

CherylE is offline  
#19 of 21 Old 12-13-2004, 12:24 PM
 
leakyandsnort's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2002
Location: NYCish
Posts: 175
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Quote:
Originally Posted by bu's mama
They tried for a long time to have a baby & they adore them, yet it's more about making the babies fit into their life than adjusting to life as a new family, if that makes any sense.
Sometimes I wonder if this here isn't the key difference in ideology between folks who tend to AP and folks who follow a more mainstream parenting style?

I actually came here this morning - I haven't posted in ages - because I was hoping to find some suggestions for my own sleeping situation, and I find, instead, that I've got it pretty good!

I agree with the other poster who said that the biggest hurdle is going to be accepting that they don't share your parenting style and don't seem to want your suggestions. It's very hard to realize how far of the 'parenting grid' you are, isn't it? I keep getting shocked every time I go back out in the world!

My twins are 9mos old and I put them to sleep by nursing - the bigger twin lays on her side and nurses and the smaller kind of lays on top of me as I lay on my side. I am able to put them down as they are almost fully asleep - I don't have to play the same "nipple wars" that I played with my son - and the past 2 nights I have been able to pat their backs if they stirred and seemed like they wanted to nurse more, and that was successful, which makes me immensely happy.

They're teething, finally, and they wake up a couple times each. Sometimes together, that weird identical twin thing, and sometimes separately, that weird painful tooth thing.

Even with two babies, and even with a 3 year old who sometimes wakes up 2x/night from a nightmare, I still get a decent amount of sleep overall. Every night? Heck, no. They've been sick on and off for 2 weeks now. I'm so not well rested. But on average, yeah. I don't expect 12 hours of sleep until they're in out of my house and in college!

Best of luck to you. Just grin and bear it...unfortunately, we're ultimately only the parents of our own kids.
leakyandsnort is offline  
#20 of 21 Old 01-04-2005, 06:30 PM
 
NatJo Mama's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2004
Location: Parker, CO
Posts: 21
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
We *never* used CIO on our babies. There are a lot of good tips in this thread!

I just want to say that it drives me crazy that people in general have this expectation that ALL babies are supposed to sleep 12 hours straight each night. It drives me bonkers when the first thing out of a stranger's mouth is: "are they sleeping through the night?". Grrr. It's really tough for some people not to have those expectations when there is not enough NON-CIO information out there. SO I have to agree that if you can help them see that there are gentler methods of getting kids to sleep it would be a great help for them.
NatJo Mama is offline  
#21 of 21 Old 01-31-2005, 02:14 AM
 
msrog's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2004
Location: Arizona
Posts: 1,301
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Quote:
Originally Posted by JoDoula
I often wonder as adults how we would feel if we were sad, hurt etc.. and kept calling our husbands name, and they just left us alone and upset? How do we then think an infant feels? Breaks my heart!
Wow, well said. I did CIO with my first, back when I was more mainstream... this makes me sad. I would hate it if that happened to me!

I also let my twins cry more than I would like, when there isn't enough ME to go around. It's hard. And sometimes I have to let them cry because I'm getting agitated and know my limits. Seems like every time that happens, they end up falling asleep quickly anyway, either God giving me a break or they were just too stimulated by me trying to calm them. But never for long, and never in the middle of the night.

I figure they're waking for a reason -- hungry or wet or something. Their tummies are tiny. I'm always amazed when one of mine does sleep through the night -- how can they go that long without starving, LOL? Does your sister in law nurse the babies? That can make a difference. I'm sure most of her twin club moms don't nurse theirs, so she should not make the same comparisons to a breastfed baby. My friend has 3 year old twins who until recently were still waking once or twice at night to eat/snuggle. My babies are 5 months old now. They can go in long stretches, but usually wake 1 or 2 times to nurse in bed. I feel rested. When McKenna fell asleep in her carseat 2 nights ago, I left her buckled there in the hall and she slept nearly 11 hours straight!!!! Without a peep. Even without a super soaker nighttime dipe on. Astonishing. But gosh, if it were my expectation that that should be the daily routine, I'd be one pissed off mama!!! Instead, I pretty much have eliminated all expectations now, and so anything is like a wonderful gift.
msrog is offline  
Reply

Quick Reply
Message:
Drag and Drop File Upload
Drag files here to attach!
Upload Progress: 0
Options

Register Now

In order to be able to post messages on the Mothering Forums forums, you must first register.
Please enter your desired user name, your email address and other required details in the form below.
User Name:
If you do not want to register, fill this field only and the name will be used as user name for your post.
Password
Please enter a password for your user account. Note that passwords are case-sensitive.
Password:
Confirm Password:
Email Address
Please enter a valid email address for yourself.
Email Address:

Log-in

Human Verification

In order to verify that you are a human and not a spam bot, please enter the answer into the following box below based on the instructions contained in the graphic.



User Tag List

Thread Tools
Show Printable Version Show Printable Version
Email this Page Email this Page


Forum Jump: 

Posting Rules  
You may post new threads
You may post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are Off