Twin Mom Pity Party thread - Mothering Forums

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Old 02-21-2007, 02:19 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Feeling sorry for yourself as a twin or greater mom? This is our official whiney thread No debating allowed - ONLY SUPPORT!

Ok - my whine - my breasts need a 2 day vacation from the twins. I want just 2 days where no one touches me for any reason, no one latches on, and an entire bed to myself. Can't complain about these things to my extended family, they think I am nuts for nursing 20 mos old twins as it is.

Okay, bring on the whine and the support
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Old 02-21-2007, 02:29 AM
 
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I'm not quite a twinmama (25 weeks and growing), but I'm tired of:
Drinking enough water to drown a grown man...every day.
Peeing every 30 minutes...all day long (not an exageration)
Protein shakes, protein shakes, protein shakes
Craming protein (in the form of meat) down my throat

That felt good!

Back to my water.
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Old 02-21-2007, 02:32 AM
 
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Oh I'll join ya sister!

My two just went through about 3 weeks of the sickies in which all they wanted to do was nurse or be carried around the house. With two almost 2 year olds it's not as easy as popping on in a sling and still getting stuff done, as I'm sure you know. They were whiny, whiny, whiny and clingy, clingy, clingy. No space to myself.

I actually love having twins, but sometimes I look at Moms with just one toddler who can go for a walk with their toddler in an Ergo, go into a cafe and have tea without their child climbing on the tables while the other pulls the bags of coffee beans out of the display, dance with just one child in their arms during music class, etc etc and feel so jealous. Sometimes I feel like I didn't get to be a first time mother.

Oh and don't even get me started on the hitting, pinching, kicking, biting and hair pulling!

Twins are hard! I seriously do not even have the first clue how triplet moms do it. At least I have 2 arms and 2 breasts -- 3 seems impossible.

SAHM to F & P, : fraternal twins born 3/05, : I, born 12/07 & at 5 weeks in July 2009
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Old 02-21-2007, 02:48 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Kewpie - you are most certainly a twin mom - at the hardest emotionally time (at least for me it was). Something I just learned about is nutritional yeast. Red Star brand has TONS of protein and you can put it on everything (awesome on popcorn).

f&p's mama - we just got over the sickies too. I had one twin in the ERGO ALL day for 2 weeks. I am totally in love as a twin mom. I think the twins are hilarious - but today at the museum when one twin slept the whole time, I almost felt like a normal person
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Old 02-21-2007, 03:04 AM
 
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Kewpie - you are most certainly a twin mom - at the hardest emotionally time (at least for me it was). Something I just learned about is nutritional yeast. Red Star brand has TONS of protein and you can put it on everything (awesome on popcorn).
Ok, so I am not a twin mom: sorry... I was just curious... and wanted to see what it was like... : But can you really eat the yeast like that?

-L

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Old 02-21-2007, 03:12 AM
 
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f&p's mama - we just got over the sickies too. I had one twin in the ERGO ALL day for 2 weeks. I am totally in love as a twin mom. I think the twins are hilarious - but today at the museum when one twin slept the whole time, I almost felt like a normal person
Your twin who is not in the Ergo doesn't freak out? Gosh, if I am wearing one the other starts yelling, "Pouch! Pouch! Pouch! Share! Share! Share!" I wish they'd let me triage this way. But all day -- yikes! That's a lot of toddler wearing.

SAHM to F & P, : fraternal twins born 3/05, : I, born 12/07 & at 5 weeks in July 2009
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Old 02-21-2007, 03:15 AM
 
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I'm not quite a twinmama (25 weeks and growing), but I'm tired of:
Drinking enough water to drown a grown man...every day.
Peeing every 30 minutes...all day long (not an exageration)
Protein shakes, protein shakes, protein shakes
Craming protein (in the form of meat) down my throat

That felt good!

Back to my water.
I am having twin pregnancy flashbacks! I was so huge. Seriously. I gained 80 lbs. I didn't even look like myself. Growing two babies in your body is hard work. Congrats on your twin pregnancy!

SAHM to F & P, : fraternal twins born 3/05, : I, born 12/07 & at 5 weeks in July 2009
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Old 02-21-2007, 04:21 AM
 
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ohh the memories of peeing every 30 min when I worked I would pee walk around the bathroom go back into stall pee again it helped tons. I gained 98lbs . And yes we have a bit of the sickies here dh brought it home from work so far I am the only one not sick but i have been boosting my v-c. Here my vent for today. My one little guy took a fresh loaf of bread fed some to the dog and hid the rest while I was making dinner the bread is still MIA when I asked dh where it was he was like huh what are you talking about. Grrr the brand new loaf since I couldn't make any today with the twinados I had to buy it. Still can't find the damn bread
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Old 02-21-2007, 08:03 AM
 
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Okay my twins are older, so no nursing/slinging issues but... THE FIGHTS :

I swear, they are actually very small teenagers. They argue over EVERYTHING!

Y'day in the car: "Baby X (dd, 2 years younger) is a boy."

"No she's not, she's a girl!"

"No she's not, she's a boy!"

"She's a girl! She has a 'gina!"

"She's a boy! She has a penis!"

This went on FOREVER. I wanted to say, "I will turn this car around!" because it was so annoying (but I withheld).

This continues along the same lines about every 3 days, they just find SOMETHING to argue about.

"Bubbie lives in Florida."

"No she doesn't, she lives at the airport!"

"No she doesn't, she lives in Florida!"

"No she doesn't, she lives at the airport!"

Finally the more sensitive one cries. :

Also, I want a pity party because recently they stopped napping and (1) they are on the go from the moment they wake up at 7am until about 7pm, no breaks! (2) however, they do start having little melt-downs around 4pm that totally suck (3) I'm pregnant with #4, I still want my nap!

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Old 02-21-2007, 12:19 PM
 
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I'm joining!!!!

I've had sick babies that then gave it to their mommy - one twin was so sick that he had to go to the hospital. We came home from the hospital that night and womp! I came down w/ a flaming case of mastitis. I got over that nand came down w/ a horrid cold that lasted more than 2 weeks. As soon as I was mostly better, the twins got sick AGAIN!!! They got better and Friday Dh andI got sick again! Now today, one twin is super sick again@!!!! We've literally been sick for months - and I didn't even talk about my others being sick .

Asfor the twin wearing, mine definitely notice when they are not the one being worn.

So, they are almost 18 mo... I called my mother and she asked how they were. I told her that Gedalya (a twin) was busy scaling the piano. She said "WHAT???? he's playing scales on the piano? I didn't know you were teaching him to play already!" (a little hard of hearing). I replied " no, no. I keep finding him standing on the piano keys!"

I get almost no break. Usually my alone time is after 9pm and before 10:30pm; then I'm back with thebabies for the night. Last night my alone time didn't start until 10:45 when my oldest finally went to bed- but I already had a baby in my bed at 11:30 and sincehe's sick I was awake THE ENTIRE NIGHT. Finally at 4:30 this morning my dh walked the floor w/him until he went to sleep.

Oh, I didn't mention how clean my house is - or, rather, isn't!

Next!

Rivka, mommy to 3 big boys and a set of b/g twins
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Old 02-21-2007, 12:48 PM
 
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I'm not quite a twinmama (25 weeks and growing), but I'm tired of:
Drinking enough water to drown a grown man...every day.
Peeing every 30 minutes...all day long (not an exageration)
Protein shakes, protein shakes, protein shakes
Craming protein (in the form of meat) down my throat
Waaaaaaaaaaaaaaah! I'm right there with ya. One more boiled egg, or glass of water, or iron supplement, or protein shake, and I'm gonna .... What? Seems like the threats are getting meaningless now. I'm gonna... lose my mind? BTDT. Get crazy? I'm hormonal enough that crazy is at least a daily occurrence. Puke? Spent 4 months doing that already.

I know that in the end, it will all be worth it. But for now, I'm tired of shoving things into my mouth. I'd like my butt to not make weird popping sounds with every step I take. I'd like to be able to get out of my bed to pee during the night (if I had to get out of bed to pee at all, much less 4 times) without it feeling like olympic level crab-walking competition to get my fat butt to the edge of the bed. I'd like to get up from a lying or standing position and be able to walk right away, instead of first having the 5 minute warmup routine of waddling while hunched over. I'd like to NOT feel as if my legs have been torn into two different directions, and like I've been kicked really hard between the legs. I'd like to sleep on my back or stomach, just for one night!

AND, I'd like a margarita.

Wife of one and mom of five, including my HBAC twins!
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Old 02-21-2007, 01:22 PM
 
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I'm whiney b/c of the sickies too. Having to take a midnight trip to the ER (twice now this past month) and being forced to take the happy sleeping baby just b/c you know he'll need you for nursies/comfort during the night just plain sucks. Combine that with having to care for them both - alone - in the ER - while dealing with stressful medical issues for one - and it's not fun. It wouldn't be fun with just one baby, but having to deal with two at the same time (and infants at that) is just plain hard! At least I had my mom available to come sit with my older kids so I didn't have to lug everyone around like that. Then one of the babies is doing breathing treatments b/c of his congestion so I have to get up in the middle of the night with him to do that, meanwhile I'm listening (the best I can over that darn machine) for the other baby who will of course wake up & need me at any moment (I have to be in a different room to do the treatment b/c it's so loud but the babies sleep in my bed so they can fall off if I'm not there). Doesn't help that dh works 24 hour shifts and I always seem to be home alone for the drama.

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Old 02-21-2007, 01:47 PM
 
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I'm sick of the fighting too. Its a constant fight it seems between either one of the twins and their older brother or its twin against twin.

Also I'm sick of the constant climbing they do. They use each other to climb even higher and its driving me nuts.

We've also had the stomach virus (again, the third time this winter) and I'm sick of vomit. The twins vomit anytime they are down flat so sleep has been hard to come by right now.
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Old 02-21-2007, 01:58 PM
 
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Where was this thread when my kids were infants and young toddlers?!

I'm convinced I'll never have any soft, warm, fuzzy memories of their infanthood and toddlerhood, only PTSD-worthy flashbacks . . . like the time I was simultaneously vomited on by the twin in the backpack (ran down the back of my neck) and the twin I was carrying in front (ran down my front into my bra.) Yuck. Or the colic, or the no sleep for 3 freakin' years. And the daily reminder of gaining 80 pounds and 3 bra sizes as evidenced by my droopy boobs and many extra inches of adominal twin skin.
Can you be in recovery from twins?
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Old 02-21-2007, 02:17 PM
 
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I have like a FLASH of a warm/fuzzy, here and there, from when they were under 1yo. But that's it!

When my twins were about 18mos-2yo, they were RUNNERS. They'd just run away from me anywhere we went (consequently, we rarely went out!) However, once when I was about 36w pregnant with #3, we were at a park and they just RAN LIKE HELL FOR THE STREET! It was the worst day of my life. I remember thinking, "I'm going to have to choose one to save and the other is going to get hit by a car!" Somehow I got them both before the street, but it was horrific.

I totally sympathize with the preggos. I remember when I was like 32w or so, and my parents were staying with me and my dad PUT THE MILK ON THE BOTTOM SHELF OF THE FRIDGE! The horrors! I couldn't reach it! I was so mad! And I totally remember doing "warm-ups" in preparation for getting up in the middle of the night. And eating more protein than... GAH.

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Old 02-21-2007, 03:08 PM
 
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I have like a FLASH of a warm/fuzzy, here and there, from when they were under 1yo. But that's it!

When my twins were about 18mos-2yo, they were RUNNERS. They'd just run away from me anywhere we went (consequently, we rarely went out!) However, once when I was about 36w pregnant with #3, we were at a park and they just RAN LIKE HELL FOR THE STREET! It was the worst day of my life. I remember thinking, "I'm going to have to choose one to save and the other is going to get hit by a car!" Somehow I got them both before the street, but it was horrific.

I totally sympathize with the preggos. I remember when I was like 32w or so, and my parents were staying with me and my dad PUT THE MILK ON THE BOTTOM SHELF OF THE FRIDGE! The horrors! I couldn't reach it! I was so mad! And I totally remember doing "warm-ups" in preparation for getting up in the middle of the night. And eating more protein than... GAH.

Oh I forgot the running, thanks for the reminder. They still run at just over 2 years of age. We don't leave the house much unless I have another adult with me because of the running.
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Old 02-21-2007, 06:14 PM
 
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I have not had any traumatic running times with the twins but when I was about 8 months pregnant with the twins my 2 year old ran away from me, down our road and was running down the next road. I was pathetically running after him with my massive belly and there was no way I could catch him and dh ended up coming out of the house and catching him. It was probably the scariest experience I have had as a parent. Thankfully I could hear that no cars were coming but it still scared me so bad and I felt like such a bad parent that I could not catch my kid.

On to the twins Everyone has been sick and Byron can not stay off the boob for more than 5 minutes. He had newborn poop today (they are 17 months), it was just like before he ate solids because he has pretty much not eaten anything and has been nursing non stop day and night. My boobs are killing me, my lips are chapped cause I can not keep up with drinking enough water and I have 3 sick kids with fevers and all. It is incredibly hard trying to carry around 2 28lb babies all day and deal with a whiny 4 year old who wants someone to sit on the couch with him at all times. I have not slept in about 2 weeks and I so just want a nap.
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Old 02-21-2007, 06:43 PM
 
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Couple more to add...

The constant freaking heartburn. I'm hb free ONLY if I lay or lean to my left side. I go through the giant Target brand tums every month, plus take 2 Pepcids a day.

I wouldn't so much mind the protein and eating all the freaking time, but it's not doing much. I put on 10 lbs I lost early on, plus another 8 or so. I just can't seem to gain weight. Makes me sad.
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Old 02-21-2007, 07:08 PM
 
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My major is the fighting. They ARE getting better as they get older, but other moms with toddlers this age just don't get it. I mean, who else has to deal with fights over a kleenex box, or a lotion bottle? :

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Old 02-21-2007, 07:21 PM
 
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Joining. We "gave up binkys" last week - and along with it . . . our nap . . . and any sort of peaceful sleeptime routine whatsoever! I so need 1 to 2 hours of downtime from them every afternoon -- and now all I do is run in/out of nursery where kids are playing, crying, taking off their clothes, taking off their diaper, pooping and peeing in their crib . . . .

Oh -- and it gets worse - because trying to get them through the afternoon, dinner, bath, bedtime . . . with no nap . . . .IS. . . SHEER . . TORTURE! They are exhausted and melt down every 30 seconds. Ever tried to cook a meal while 3 two-year olds are crying and fighting every 30 seconds? AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

Oh yeah - and did I mention that this day-time sleep disturbance cascades into similar problems at night? You'd think they'd be exhausted and go right to sleep? Oh no - they are overtired - and fight sleep and cry and can't figure out how to calm down enough to fall asleep, etc. etc.

THIS. MUST. NORMALIZE. VERY. VERY. SOON!

TripMom . . . . . loving mom : to DS (7) and BBG (4.5)
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Old 02-21-2007, 08:19 PM
 
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I mean, who else has to deal with fights over a kleenex box, or a lotion bottle? :
I totally feel ya. We deal with fights about all kinds of stupid crap here too. "No that's MY empty milk carton!" "Mommy he stole my piece of grass from the backyard!" Drives me NUTS.

TripMom, I send you BIG hugs!

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Old 02-21-2007, 09:12 PM
 
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I have not had any traumatic running times with the twins but when I was about 8 months pregnant with the twins my 2 year old ran away from me, down our road and was running down the next road. I was pathetically running after him with my massive belly and there was no way I could catch him....
That must have been a sight! I tried running the other day to get out of the rain on our way into a restaurant. My son said I looked like Edgar in Men In Black after the bug took over his body-- arms flailing, legs bowed, ...

Hope everyone feels better soon.

Wife of one and mom of five, including my HBAC twins!
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Old 02-21-2007, 09:41 PM
 
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I have not had any traumatic running times with the twins but when I was about 8 months pregnant with the twins my 2 year old ran away from me, down our road and was running down the next road. I was pathetically running after him with my massive belly and there was no way I could catch him and dh ended up coming out of the house and catching him. It was probably the scariest experience I have had as a parent. Thankfully I could hear that no cars were coming but it still scared me so bad and I felt like such a bad parent that I could not catch my kid.
This happened to me too when I was pg with the twins (very pg). My then 2yo ran out ahead of me in the Target parking lot to the opposite side of the van where I couldn't see her. What I *did* see was a car heading toward where she was about to run speeding down the parking isle. I ran as fast as I could, holding my belly the whole time, and screamed "ALI STOP!". This person heard me and looked to see what on earth was going on. She was okay, I burst into tears, and couldn't stop crying the whole way home.

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Old 02-21-2007, 09:52 PM
 
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My 3 year olds have been sick for 3 weeks. First, a stomach virus, then a cold, and another cold on top of the first cold.

I've been having WAAAAAAY to many Mommy meltdowns. Not to mention dh has been sick about as long as the boys, so no help from him.

The fighting is nonstop these days. I can no longer say "Toys are for playing, not throwing" in a pleasant manner. We've missed gymnastics, storytime, skiing.........so my kids are bored out of their minds at home and so am I.

That feels good to vent.

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Old 02-22-2007, 01:17 AM
 
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I told DH last night that I felt so alone in this. I'm so happy to see this thread and know it's not just me.

My twin pregnancy whines:
I'm sick of eating protein and eating it makes me sick.
I'm tired of the rude, nosy questions that I haven't come up with good comebacks for yet.

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Old 02-22-2007, 02:08 AM - Thread Starter
 
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But can you really eat the yeast like that?

-L
Nutritional Yeast not baking yeast
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Old 02-22-2007, 02:10 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Your twin who is not in the Ergo doesn't freak out?
Not exactly, non-Ergo'd twin is usually in my arms when sick. Luckily, they kind of tag teamed sickness so the sickest stayed with me on my back. They other played off and on.
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Old 02-22-2007, 04:18 AM
 
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I told DH last night that I felt so alone in this. I'm so happy to see this thread and know it's not just me.

My twin pregnancy whines:
I'm sick of eating protein and eating it makes me sick.
I'm tired of the rude, nosy questions that I haven't come up with good comebacks for yet.
Give us some of the romments and I will share some of my comebacks I'm a true smart ass so trust me I have used them on all kinds of people I usually got a few laughs a few people who told me I was rude and I asked them if their question was just as rude or about equall just so I knew how to gadge it the next time.
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Old 02-22-2007, 11:32 AM
 
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Thank you for starting this thread! It is so nice to know I'm not alone in some of these issues and frustrations!

Here's mine to add: POTTY LEARNING!!! AGHHHHH!! Do you know how difficult it is to keep a watchful eye on two naked bottoms? Do you know how many puddles and piles I have cleaned up in the last few weeks?: Yet try to put diapers on them and they scream "No Diaper, no diaper) and take them right back off.

The good news is my girl twin has been actually very successful the last couple of days, so far this morning! DS, well, at least maybe I'll just have his messes to clean up now.

"We think we're gliding down the highway when in fact we're slip sliding away." Paul Simon
DD-7 & B-G twins, 5
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Old 02-22-2007, 12:19 PM
 
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Originally Posted by YumaDoula View Post
Okay my twins are older, so no nursing/slinging issues but... THE FIGHTS :

I swear, they are actually very small teenagers. They argue over EVERYTHING!

Y'day in the car: "Baby X (dd, 2 years younger) is a boy."

"No she's not, she's a girl!"

"No she's not, she's a boy!"

"She's a girl! She has a 'gina!"

"She's a boy! She has a penis!"

This went on FOREVER. I wanted to say, "I will turn this car around!" because it was so annoying (but I withheld).

This continues along the same lines about every 3 days, they just find SOMETHING to argue about.

"Bubbie lives in Florida."

"No she doesn't, she lives at the airport!"

"No she doesn't, she lives in Florida!"

"No she doesn't, she lives at the airport!"

Finally the more sensitive one cries. :

Also, I want a pity party because recently they stopped napping and (1) they are on the go from the moment they wake up at 7am until about 7pm, no breaks! (2) however, they do start having little melt-downs around 4pm that totally suck (3) I'm pregnant with #4, I still want my nap!
I'm in the same boat as you, but I have twin girls that are 3 yr. they do a lot of figting too. They finally stopped biting eachother.
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