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#1 of 37 Old 03-20-2007, 07:35 PM - Thread Starter
 
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OK - I am sure there have been one or two threads around here about dressing your twins in matching clothes. My boys out of my triplets are id -- and admittedly - I have really enjoyed dressing them identically. They are only 2 for Pete's sake. Over the last year or so I've gotten more and more comments about it. People point it out. People ask why I do it. Most of the subtext to the comments seem disapproving. I found myself feeling like I had to make up excuses for it . . . like . . oh, its so easy when I'm shopping to just buy 2 of everything (which is true, btw) . . . but the truth is . . . I don't know why I do it . . . . but I do enjoy dressing them alike! I guess I am just kind of amazed at how seemingly bothersome it is to people? Enough so that they are willing to bring it up to me? Was wondering if others out there experienced this too?

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#2 of 37 Old 03-20-2007, 07:51 PM
 
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Mine are a boy and a girl, but I absolutely LOVE dressing them in matching outfits (ofcourse for boy/girl). I actually try to find matching outfits (which is harder than I would have imagined). I think it is soooooo adorable!!!

Bottom line is, they are your kids and you should dress them anyway you want. If someone has a problem with that, its THEIR problem. Dont let it bother you and enjoy your little ones
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#3 of 37 Old 03-20-2007, 08:00 PM
 
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I get judgemental comments because we *don't* dress them alike!! Someone actually asked (seriously) how they can be twins if they are wearing different clothes, and if we were sure they were identical!!! Geez...

I agree with the PP -- they're your kids, and if it makes you happy in even the smallest way, then go for it!!! I love dressing my girls, period. My DH always says "Oh, let the babysitter do that when she gets here" but it makes me happy to see them freshly dressed in the morning, hair tidy, briefly clean...Somehow I forget about the piles of laundry and other headaches when I do.
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#4 of 37 Old 03-20-2007, 08:38 PM
 
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I dress my girls alike but different colors. I bought them sweatsuits at Childrens place and bought one pink and one green. I bought them little disney outfits and bought one pink and one purple. they do have some identical outfits but I try to mix it up a bit because then i dont have two of exactly the same thing. they are only 3mos and so far i have gotten no comments at all about that...
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#5 of 37 Old 03-20-2007, 09:03 PM
 
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i love dressing mine in coordinating clothes. just got the thing1/thing2 rompers
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#6 of 37 Old 03-20-2007, 10:20 PM
 
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Like Lisa, I always get comments regarding why I don't dress them alike (though they are occasionally in coordinating outfits)! What cracks me up is that people say they can tell them apart b/c they are wearing different clothes--if they were dressed alike, they couldn't? Strange.
And Rachel, we just got those rompers, too!

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#7 of 37 Old 03-20-2007, 10:38 PM
 
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I've had the range of comments on this. Though my personal preference is to do the same thing/different colors (but we don't 'assign' a color to each DS), if I have to buy 2 of the same thing to get the multiples discount then that's what I do. And whenever our family goes to a crowded outing, the kids all wear bright tie dye t-shirts in the same colors so I can spot the gang with a glance.

I honestly get more comments from teachers/care providers (at the nursery and at the 'kids corner' in the grocery store we go to, and at preschool) thanking me for not dressing them alike, so that they too can tell at a glance who's who. But when they do choose the same outfit OR we are going to the zoo/kid's museum, then I get comments about how cute it is that they're dressed alike too. It just doesn't happen very often, because I very rarely buy new clothing (always go thrift store first) so they just don't have a lot of matching clothing.

I was more tempted to buy twin outfits when I still was a member of my local moms of multiples group and you could buy sets at their fall/spring clothing and toy sale.
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#8 of 37 Old 03-20-2007, 10:52 PM
 
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I never dressed my (boy/girl) twins alike. And being TOTALLY honest, there is something about buying identical outfits in the same size that just seems totally wasteful to me. : Whenever I see multiples in identical outfits, literally every time, I think about all the children in our city who could benefit from that "extra" outfit. It's just against my values I think, i.e., with 2 identifical children you don't need TWICE the outfits, but maybe only 50% more or whatever. Our 2nd son wears almost only his older brothers' hand-me-downs with a few exceptions. Even with boy/girl twins I stocked up on navy, green, red, yellow Hanna wiggle pants and both babies shared them. I bought cloth diapers in neutral colors or bug prints or whatever that they could share that way I didn't need two completely duplicative diaper sets. When dd got bigger than ds by an entire size for a time there, I got her a yellow raincoat and then handed it down to her twin brother a few months later. Really not trying to hurt anyone's feelings but I'm trying to explain my POV.
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#9 of 37 Old 03-20-2007, 11:39 PM
 
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My twins almost always coordinate with different colors. They actually usually choose their own clothes and almost all of their clothes are hand-me-downs. Their matching outfits are bought by great-grandma when then sews a little ribbon on A's dress/shirt so SHE can tell them apart at a glance LOL. I don't get comments either way.
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#10 of 37 Old 03-20-2007, 11:54 PM
 
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Originally Posted by Periwinkle View Post
I never dressed my (boy/girl) twins alike. And being TOTALLY honest, there is something about buying identical outfits in the same size that just seems totally wasteful to me. :


Hey, if I need two pairs of pants, and can't find the right size/appropriate weight in the thrift store, you better bet your patootie if I get a 20 percent discount if I buy two of the same pants, I'll do it. I don't see what's 'wasteful' about it.

Unless you're implying that your kids will always share clothes and you don't buy or borrow anything that can't be used by both for the forseeable future, I don't see how it's any more wasteful that buying clothes for multiple kids now and then, if sometimes the handmedown won't cut it and/or be available at the right time.

Eh, then again, I've got more than one pair of jeans. (actually, now that I think about it, my kids do too). That's wasteful too, if you think about it. Why have 2 of anything then you can make do with one.

Though I admit, when people have two identical outfits of EVERYTHING that seems a bit off, but let's face it, a lot of times that's what you get as gifts because people love that kind of thing. Especially when the kiddos are little. I tend to get a little more at people who dress their 13 month old in an all leather baby GAP outfit complete with full accessories than I do when I see people who dress their kids alike in normal clothes. Though apparently the leather GAP stuff is machine washable. So if it was in the $5 bin at the consignment store, I might be tempted. ;>
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#11 of 37 Old 03-21-2007, 12:30 AM
 
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My babies aren't born yet, so I haven't gotten any comments from strangers yet. DH is a twin and he HATED it when his mother dressed them alike. So, I guess when they are old enough to know I won't dress them alike unless it is something they want to do. Unless it is a family picture or something where the whole family is coordinated in similiar styles/colors/etc, then they will be out of luck

But I have already been purchasing matching cloths. I havent' bought anything identical, but I have purchased similiar patterns with a different cut or the same thing but in different colors. I just think when they are little it is so cute when they are similiar in what they wear.

My son and my nephew are only a month apart in age. When they were babies, my sister and I used to coordinate what they wore, just because they looked sooo stinking cute together. We didn't care that we always got "are they twins?" We always corrected, but we just liked seeing them looking alike
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#12 of 37 Old 03-21-2007, 01:39 AM
 
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Almost all of the clothes i'm getting are coming as handmedowns from a friend of a friend with twin girls. I'm having visions of matching pepto babies LOL! I don't think that having two of the same is a big deal unless if makes you need to change both babies after spills and blowouts so they always match. That seems like a waste of time and water to me. I figure what ever I don't get as hand me downs can easily be made up in longies (and shorties for summer) and lots of tops. I think we'll likely get coordinating dresses for pictures, but other then that, whatever is cheap easy and cute is fair game . I agree with twin sales... I'm definately planning on hitting those up too (going to the spring sale on the 31st WOO HOO!)

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#13 of 37 Old 03-21-2007, 01:44 AM
 
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I don't like dressign mine alike. They also wear a lot of hand me down stuff from their cousins so dressing alike wouldn't really be doable (and we don't have the $$ to buy new clothes). But they are your kids and you should dress them however makes you happy until they fuss about it (which for my kids was under 2 :

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#14 of 37 Old 03-21-2007, 01:47 AM
 
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I never wanted my babies to wear matching anything, but once I had them I totally caught the matching disease. The only people who give me a hard time about it are some of my friends b/c they think it's too cheesy (which is how I felt, pre-twins) but I don't really care - well, much. Mine don't look anything alike so maybe that's part of why I like them to match. Gives people a better clue (although they still ask quite frequently) that they're twins. I don't remember strangers ever commenting on them matching or not (usually they don't but more and more I buy them matching outfits).

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#15 of 37 Old 03-21-2007, 01:51 AM
 
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i think its adorable personally i remember trying to wear matching outfits with my friends ALL the time, wishing i had a twin
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#16 of 37 Old 03-21-2007, 05:11 PM
 
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I dress my girls alike still and they will be 4 in May. They dont really know just yet why they are in the same clothes. They will however get into different things when we stay at home (different dressup things). But when we go out in public, I definately like them in the same thing. Ans I will continue as long as they let me. So, so far so good. They don't mind it right now. they really dont know any different.
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#17 of 37 Old 03-21-2007, 06:11 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Originally Posted by Periwinkle View Post
I never dressed my (boy/girl) twins alike. And being TOTALLY honest, there is something about buying identical outfits in the same size that just seems totally wasteful to me. : Whenever I see multiples in identical outfits, literally every time, I think about all the children in our city who could benefit from that "extra" outfit. It's just against my values I think, i.e., with 2 identifical children you don't need TWICE the outfits, but maybe only 50% more or whatever. Our 2nd son wears almost only his older brothers' hand-me-downs with a few exceptions. Even with boy/girl twins I stocked up on navy, green, red, yellow Hanna wiggle pants and both babies shared them. I bought cloth diapers in neutral colors or bug prints or whatever that they could share that way I didn't need two completely duplicative diaper sets. When dd got bigger than ds by an entire size for a time there, I got her a yellow raincoat and then handed it down to her twin brother a few months later. Really not trying to hurt anyone's feelings but I'm trying to explain my POV.
I don't get you at all here? I have 2 kids - they each need clothes? How is it wasteful to buy them the same shirt and pants - I mean, I just don't get how that's wasteful, they both need clothes?

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#18 of 37 Old 03-21-2007, 06:16 PM - Thread Starter
 
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OK - this wasn't really a thread on do you or don't you dress them alike or should you or shouldn't you dress them alike -- which is kind of what its turned into.

I just thought it was so odd that people kept commenting somewhat negatively on the fact that I do dress them alike -- so I take from the responses that not a lot of people are getting the same feedback.

thanks!

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#19 of 37 Old 03-21-2007, 06:57 PM
 
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I don't get you at all here? I have 2 kids - they each need clothes? How is it wasteful to buy them the same shirt and pants - I mean, I just don't get how that's wasteful, they both need clothes?
I get it. I rarely buy my twins new clothes. I never dress them alike. My boys have different body types and although they are VERY close in size, I still have one boy bigger than the other. So, when relatives send me 2 identical brand new outfits, we don't get total use out of them. For one, because I choose to not have the boys wear the same exact things together and because most clothes styles either fit one body type or the other better. So, one boy ends up with both shirts or both pants that are alike. My kids usually outgrow their clothes so fast that I feel like I don't get enough use out of those clothes. When my bigger boy outgrows some pants, I can pass them on to the thinner boy. If the pants are both the same, I can't do that. Also, if the pants are a bit snug at the waste (some styles are), then my bigger son can't wear them at all and my thinner son gets 2 of the same pair of pants.

I feel we get more use out of clothes if relatives send 2 different kinds of pants. We can do the hand down method. I have requested family to do this when buying the boys' clothes, so we can get more use out of clothes.

I was just trying to clarify what I thought the other poster was saying. I feel my situation may be like hers.

We also made a choice to not dress our children the same, so that may have something to do with this "way of thinking". My boys tend to pick out a shirt and it becomes "his" shirt. If I try to put the same style shirt on my other son, it causes some problems. So, one boy ends up getting 2 exact same shirts if we have 2 and the shirts get outgrown before they both get worn that much.

This is very hard to explain, so thanks for reading. I'm trying to share my point of view on this, but it's challenging! All to their own!

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#20 of 37 Old 03-21-2007, 07:02 PM
 
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I like it to a certain extent, I've even purchased a few coordinating outfits (boy/girl). I think the big thing is that as kids grow older, they have their own identities and tastes, they ought to dress accordingly. They need to be seen as someone other than "a twin." At least that's what my grown cousins have told me (wore matching oufits for many, many years, which they grew to hate). If I had b/b or g/g twins, I'd definitley match them now and again, but only for special occasions, holidays, birthdays, etc. But to each their own.
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#21 of 37 Old 03-21-2007, 07:25 PM - Thread Starter
 
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I get it. I rarely buy my twins new clothes. I never dress them alike. My boys have different body types and although they are VERY close in size, I still have one boy bigger than the other. So, when relatives send me 2 identical brand new outfits, we don't get total use out of them. For one, because I choose to not have the boys wear the same exact things together and because most clothes styles either fit one body type or the other better. So, one boy ends up with both shirts or both pants that are alike. My kids usually outgrow their clothes so fast that I feel like I don't get enough use out of those clothes. When my bigger boy outgrows some pants, I can pass them on to the thinner boy. If the pants are both the same, I can't do that. Also, if the pants are a bit snug at the waste (some styles are), then my bigger son can't wear them at all and my thinner son gets 2 of the same pair of pants.

I feel we get more use out of clothes if relatives send 2 different kinds of pants. We can do the hand down method. I have requested family to do this when buying the boys' clothes, so we can get more use out of clothes.

I was just trying to clarify what I thought the other poster was saying. I feel my situation may be like hers.

We also made a choice to not dress our children the same, so that may have something to do with this "way of thinking". My boys tend to pick out a shirt and it becomes "his" shirt. If I try to put the same style shirt on my other son, it causes some problems. So, one boy ends up getting 2 exact same shirts if we have 2 and the shirts get outgrown before they both get worn that much.

This is very hard to explain, so thanks for reading. I'm trying to share my point of view on this, but it's challenging! All to their own!
Sounds like it has more to do with having twins who are basically 2 different sizes than anything else. My guys are truly identical - exact same size - and I can't even tell them apart unless I am looking directly at them in the face!

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#22 of 37 Old 03-21-2007, 07:36 PM
 
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We also made a choice to not dress our children the same, so that may have something to do with this "way of thinking". My boys tend to pick out a shirt and it becomes "his" shirt. If I try to put the same style shirt on my other son, it causes some problems. So, one boy ends up getting 2 exact same shirts if we have 2 and the shirts get outgrown before they both get worn that much.

This is very hard to explain, so thanks for reading. I'm trying to share my point of view on this, but it's challenging! All to their own!
OK I thought my girls were teh only ones who did this!!!!! I never used to have seperate clothes for them (although one is bigger than the other, they used to be able to wear the same size, now they are a size apart). All of a sudden around a year ago I would give Nechama a shirt and she was scream "NO RENA SHIRT" Ummm... okay. If you say so Mine have totally sepearte clothes now for the most part, although I will buy the same (but in a different size) if there is only 1 style that fits right. I do have problems when N. outgrows someething and I want to pass it to Rena. Sometimes she won't wear it because it's Nechama's, or Nechama will flip because Rena is wearing her clothes.

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#23 of 37 Old 03-21-2007, 07:44 PM
 
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Sounds like it has more to do with having twins who are basically 2 different sizes than anything else. My guys are truly identical - exact same size - and I can't even tell them apart unless I am looking directly at them in the face!
Partly a size thing.

Also a personal preference thing. When there's 4 pair's of pants, I would rather have 4 different styles verses 2 different styles. Since we choose to have our boys with "different" clothes, we experience and use the "same" clothes differently. If I dressed my boys the same, I would probably get more use out of the "same" outfits.

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#24 of 37 Old 03-21-2007, 08:29 PM
 
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I don't do it exclusively, but I just love to dress my boy/girl twins in matching outfits, whether they be the exact same, complementary, or at least similar. No special reason other than its so fun to do and I think they look totally adorable that way (see the photo link in my sig). Well I guess its also kind of convenient. I rarely buy them new clothes (we were blessed with tons of gifts and I love thrift stores), but when I do, I almost always go for matching outfits...its just a fun twin thing for me.

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#25 of 37 Old 03-21-2007, 09:54 PM
 
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TripMom, I and apparently others understood from your OP that you were looking for opinions about dressing multiples alike or were questioning why people don't like it and comment on it. I tried to give you my feelings on it as best I could. You don't have to agree with me and it's clear I'm in the minority here but for the cost/waste factor as well as the seeing the kids as individuals not a "set" factor, I almost never dressed mine alike. Different strokes for different folks I guess.
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#26 of 37 Old 03-21-2007, 11:00 PM
 
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OK I thought my girls were teh only ones who did this!!!!! I never used to have seperate clothes for them (although one is bigger than the other, they used to be able to wear the same size, now they are a size apart). All of a sudden around a year ago I would give Nechama a shirt and she was scream "NO RENA SHIRT" Ummm... okay. If you say so :shurg: Mine have totally sepearte clothes now for the most part, although I will buy the same (but in a different size) if there is only 1 style that fits right. I do have problems when N. outgrows someething and I want to pass it to Rena. Sometimes she won't wear it because it's Nechama's, or Nechama will flip because Rena is wearing her clothes.
Ah, yes! This started very early for my boys. I can pretty much guess what type of clothes each will like, too. They are only 3 years old and mostly pick out their clothes to wear each day(I was the same way at a very young age). That's if I can get clothes on them!!

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#27 of 37 Old 03-22-2007, 12:16 AM
 
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I've gotten comments going either way, though normally "agreeing" with whichever I've done that day. So on days that the girls are dressed the same I'll have people tell me how great it is that I dress them alike (depends on my mood whether I smile & nod or tell them that the girls chose their clothes. I generally go for smile & nod so I'm not stuck talking all day LOL) and on days when they're not dressed alike I get commends about how great it is that I don't dress them alike, shrug.

When I buy clothes, I generally buy 2 exactly the same, or the same but in different colors. Mainly because I don't know how I'd decide what to get other wise LOL. We use alot of hand-me-downs though, which obviously aren't matching. And starting pretty young (they're almost 4 & it's been long enough that I don't remember when they started) the girls have chosen their own clothes. So now it's generally their choice whether they match or not, and sometimes they want to, other times they don't. I figure even when they have the same clothes they don't have to wear them the same day, but since they like to dress the same sometimes it's easier to just buy stuff the same/coordinating & let them decide whether to wear them the same day or not.
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#28 of 37 Old 03-22-2007, 02:50 AM
 
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I haven't dressed my two alike since they were tiny and I don't remember if I got any comments then -- too sleep deprived to remember much. I try to coordinate their outfits most of the time.

Anyway, I think people make comments because of the strong value in American culture with respect to individuality. I think people worry that they won't individuate or that you don't see them as individuals if you dress them alike. One of my friends was complaining to me that she sees twin moms do this & how hard it must be to be a twin in the first place and how this adds to it, blah blah blah. Meanwhile said twins are 15-months and have no self-concept yet.

People always have a comment that they aren't afraid to share, don't they?

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#29 of 37 Old 03-22-2007, 08:11 PM
 
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I unabashedly dressed mine identically because of "cuteness" factor and I don't care. I got comments and I'd always say something totally snarky like, "What's the point of having twins if you can't dress them like dolls?" : :

Actually I always knew in my heart that one day they'd start picking their own clothes and never dress alike. And it happened when they were about 2.5yo or 3yo. So I still buy 2 of the same shirt and pants and whatever, but it's very rare that they dress totally alike. Sometimes they do wear the same pants.

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#30 of 37 Old 03-22-2007, 10:50 PM
 
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I do both. In the begin I was very much against dressing them alike but I realized that it is fun doing it sometimes. I mostly dressed them similar but not exactly alike...or the same outfit but different colors.

I had a woman make a comment about them being fraternal. I said that they were identical and she said "But you don't have them dressed alike!" : Didn't realize it was a rule.

Karen - Mama to Haven (9/00) , Lillie & Faith (MZ - 12/02) and my first homebirthed baby, Willa (3/08)
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