Short-term sacrifice (guilt) vs. long-term goals - Mothering Forums

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#1 of 5 Old 01-07-2009, 06:47 PM - Thread Starter
 
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I'm considering entering a massage therapy school. Classes would be T-W-Th from 6-10 PM. Kids go to bed around 7-7:30. They have preschool T-Th 9-2 and a sitter for a 2-3 hours a day M-W-F. I work as a freelance writer. I'd have to continue to work on a reduced schedule to pay for childcare and commuting costs. Plus I'm assuming I'll need study time.

The only thing I'm feeling antsy about is the childcare situation. I'd be away from them for more than I've ever been. (And I know it's still not a lot compared to some parents. I realize I'm very lucky in this regard.) Still I'm really trying to rally myself for a short-term sacrifice versus meeting my long-term goals. The program takes 14 months, and after this school year ends, I can adjust if needed to have fewer daytime care hours.

DH has said he will go in earlier so that he can be home by 5 T-W-TH so that we can eat together as a family. Then he would handle bath & bed. He keeps saying that I'm really only talking 1-1.5 hours of "awake time" with the kids.

About 5 years ago, I toyed with the idea of opening a wellness center, which is what I'd dearly love to do. At the time, it wasn't feasible for us logistically, and then I fell into freelancing for 4 years. I need a change, and I know financially (and likely emotionally as well), this would be a necessary first step. I'm just suffering from Mommy Guilt because it feels so indulgent. Help?Advice? How do you balance Mom's needs with family's needs?

It's us: DH , DS ; DD ; and me . Also there's the . And the 3 . I . Oh, and .
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#2 of 5 Old 01-07-2009, 06:48 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Egads. Forgot to sub...

It's us: DH , DS ; DD ; and me . Also there's the . And the 3 . I . Oh, and .
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#3 of 5 Old 01-07-2009, 09:55 PM
 
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I don't think you have anything to feel guilty about. Following your dreams is the BEST way to be a role model for your children.
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#4 of 5 Old 01-07-2009, 10:01 PM
 
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I'm thinking about going to school or maybe working part time in the next few years. I think you should go for it. I would do it now, but the stress would be too much for me. How do your children do with other care givers? Mine are with me all the time and we relate to eachother so much better after getting a break from eachother. I did some freelance work a while back, and will do it again when I get the chance. When I finish a project, I feel so good about myself and have a renewed energy to spend quality time with my family.
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#5 of 5 Old 01-07-2009, 10:57 PM
 
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I just posted basically this same question!

So I don't really have an answer. I guess deep-down I believe that my being in school will be the best thing for me and my family because, in the short term, I am pursuing a passion and following a dream (which is good for me, of course, and has got to be a good example for dd) and, in the long term, will provide me with a good career and a good income and a flexible schedule so I can still spend lots of time with my babies.

Mama to a beautiful girl since May 2007 and a beautiful boy since August 2010! :
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