Ahhh, its interesting you ask that! I'm fried. I came here looking for something too. Perhaps encouragement, maybe comisseration.
I teach first grade in a very low income and low parent involvement school. At home I have two girls; one is four in September and the other will be two in November. Dh is frequently out of town for his AMAZING (though non-profit) job.
School in general wears me out such that I am unable to care for my kids the way I'd like. This time of year is just sheer work. My home kids know they are being slighted and become little monsters until I spend quality time with each of them.
Easing the transition? I make sure I'm home to put them in bed no. matter. what. We get outdoor time everyday, even if its just 15 minutes. I sacrifice home cooked meals for (Kashi) frozen pizzas so that I can run and play with them. I lay out clothes and make lunches the night before, after they are asleep. Instead of putting away the laundry, its on my couch and kitchen table until I can find the time to take care of it (and I will, eventually). I am absent from school when/if I need or want to be.
I'd love to know what you find works for you, especially if its something I'm not already doing!!
( All of this is descriptive not prescriptive, as I'm getting out of the rat race, ASAP. My school is not aware that this shall be my last year teaching full-time with small children depending on me. I feel like I am always working my @$$ off just fail to strike a balance. )