Nanny husband says I'm just nuts. - Page 2 - Mothering Forums

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#31 of 35 Old 10-26-2011, 03:02 AM
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Im sorry to hear you have had a tough time with a total loser of a Nanny. People like her give us other Nannies a bad name. we all arent that bad!

I had to read that post a couple of times and am totaly horrified that someone can do that.  I have been a Nanny for over 15 years now and also now recruit New Zealand Nannies overseas(Im in Australia) and I have never in all that time come across anything like this. I have met lots of Nannies and families in all different countries and have heard lots of different stories about various nannies but never have I heard of one this bad. The way she is acting she will end up losing her child as thats not a good environment to bring a child up in with smoking,drinking and partner in jail and all the rest. Im glad she is no longer working for you as the children dont need to go thru all of that and also you dont need the stress of that-especialy being away alot.

I talked to a family 2 weeks ago who were looking for a nanny and they said to me if any nanny is interested in job and she smokes we wont interview her as we dont want a smoker.

Im still in shock that she can be so pathetic and am lost for words(which is very uncommon for me) Make sure with the next one check references(you probaby did but she sounds like such a liar that she would have made it all up) and ask for as many phone numbers as you can. google the questions to ask the person you call and I would ask even more questions. Im sure there will be a nice perfect Nanny or Aupair out there for you who isnt a total drop kick like the previous one...


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#32 of 35 Old 10-27-2011, 07:54 AM
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A friend of mine has also had great experiences with au pairs - regularly keeps in touch with a few of the old ones (attended one's wedding even), kids learn new languages, etc. They have all been sweet and good with the kids. It helps that they have a separate bedroom and bathroom on the ground floor & family has their bedrooms upstairs, so there is some privacy & separation because it's not a huge house. It's great to try to employ people in the area for childcare, but if it's not working, it's not working. Of course, there is an added cost to going through an agency to get an au pair, but at least they are vetted and all the legalities are taken care of. Also, from your posts it seems like this cost would be more than offset by recouping the money from your business when you have the peace of mind that your kids are well cared for.


I also don't understand your husband's point of view! It's not like any of these are possibly gray areas, like being 10 min. late once in a while,  this is over-the-top crazy and *dangerous* stuff!

Mom "D" to DD1 "Z" (15) and DD2 "I" (11) DH "M"

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#33 of 35 Old 10-27-2011, 08:07 AM
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Originally Posted by BabyFireFly View Post

That's where we are!!!


I have room for a live in, but I'm so worried about moving someone in and then having something go wrong....then you have to worry about them moving out!


I'm going to speak with some of the neighbors and local business owners and see if they know of anyone who is looking for this sort of job. Really, it's a great gig....hang out and play with kids and horses all day, have the run of the place, eat my food, use my computer....and get paid WELL. If any of you NY mamas know of anyone looking....hehe.


I did not. But next time, I sure will. I like putting things in writing, I think it keeps everything clear and straightforward. Didn't think I needed to when it came to childcare, but you live and you learn.


well as my mother would say, the world is one square block. I bet I wouldn't even recognize the place now. I remember when the gas station / mini mart went up (must have been 20 years ago now...), and it was big news! When I was a kid we went to swim in the lake (years before it was a private club).


Good luck witih the nanny stuff, and thanks for the trip down memory lane! If you have a blog of any pics online I'd love to see. Gosh I'm almost crying.


Sorry, took the thread waaaay off topic :x


Mom to:

Three big girls  twins.gif (10) + joy.gif (almost 9!); 

One little boy ROTFLMAO.gif(6) and a full on toddler diaper.gif  (8/12) born with TAPVR heartbeat.gif (repaired at 6 days old).

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#34 of 35 Old 10-28-2011, 11:11 PM
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I would have fired her the second day.  I cannot abide lateness.


That alone would have been it.


The rest is just superfulous evidence of a woman who needs a job but doesn't want one.


I would let her go and start looking fo an au pair who can live with you.


There are some great angencies that can you up with one.  Maybe one who speaks a different language and can teach your LO and new language.


Can you get family or a friend to fill in while you find someone?



Rebekah - mom to Ben 03/05 and Emily 01/10, a peace educator, and a veg*n and wife to Jamie.
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#35 of 35 Old 10-31-2011, 06:58 AM
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Glad to hear it resolved itself. And no, you definitely weren't being overly critical. If she was just a bit late at times, or sometimes left the house messy, or that sort of thing, sure you can overlook that, but all of those things plus the big deal things, no way! You can definitely find someone better. And I agree, draw up a contract next time with some rules (more than 5 or 10 minutes late, you can dock pay, especially if not contacted about the lateness, no people over that aren't agreed to ahead of time by you, etc.) and then a separate short list of guidelines and expectations. Like expecting the house to be in relatively the same condition you left it, bedtimes, etc. And then when anything of concern comes up, bring it up right away and work together to solve it. It can be so hard to confront, but the nanny is your employee!

Katie trekkie.gif - Married to Mike 06/02/01, Mom to Sydney Anne born 11/21/09 and Alice Maeryn & Oliver Thomas born 04/24/13  hug.gif 



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