Need opinions about dog situation - Mothering Forums

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#1 of 4 Old 02-04-2012, 12:44 AM - Thread Starter
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I'm cross posting in toddler & in working parents in the hopes of getting opinions from, well WOH parents & parents of toddlers. Hopefully some dog lovers as well.
I've wanted a dog for awhile. A big dog, preferably a bull mastiff rescue. We got a medium sized dog last fall from a local rescue outside petsmart. She is a great dog. Once settled in she understands her place &I have few worries about her being around my 18 month old, though I do supervise. He is still learning to be gentle. She also doesn't bark much which is important to me. However this is not the dog I wanted. We got her because my step daughter flat out insisted she wanted this dog & refused to even look at another. Yes I am fully aware the blame lies with me on that one. I cannot explain why I gave in when my normal reaction to that behavior is to ignore or go home. On paper she looked like the perfect family dog so we adopted her. Well she would be except she is a very high energy dog. She needs a lot of play time. A lot. I work full time days, dp works nights & weekends. DSD never bonded with the dog she insisted on, never walks her, rarely plays with her, & is irritated by her energy so much that we have had to have talks with her about putting her in her crate too much (she came to us crate trained). Dp likes her best & does spend time with her, but his time is limited. For the record dsd has a dog at her mom's house that she does walk & play with.

What do you believe is better for the dog? To stay with us where she is familiar or to have the possibility of a family that will play with her a lot more? I'm not talking about leaving her at a shelter, we would turn into a Foster. I feel like a terrible person considering giving up an animal I adopted. I feel like a terrible person having a dog that needs more than I can give. I asked a friend about this & she kind of lectured me, but then she is single, no kids. I feel like that makes a huge difference, but maybe I am looking for excuses? Or maybe as my toddler gets older it will get better? Unless we have a second baby. I'm so torn, please weigh in!

sent from my phone using tapatalk, please forgive typos

Loving mama to Aden (8/5/2010) and DSD (15).
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#2 of 4 Old 02-04-2012, 08:51 AM
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Maybe this dog could be your DS's dog?  Or yours for that matter.  While I can how it's hard to have to take care of something you yourself didn't want does you DS like the dog?  I would seriously just say the dog is no longer your step daughters and keep the supervision up between your son and the dog.  You never know a great friendship might come out of it. 


However if you really think you can find a better family for the dog.  Let the whole family know what you're considering.  If the DSD is ok with it then I would find the dog a new home. 

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#3 of 4 Old 02-04-2012, 10:11 AM - Thread Starter
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My dp & I have discussed & he says dsd also is OK with giving her up. I think dp is not sure what he wants. You are right, it's possible a great friendship could happen with my ds, I don't know how long it would be until that happens. Currently he alternates between chasing her with things that make her run away, hitting her in the way of toddlers, & being afraid of her.

sent from my phone using tapatalk, please forgive typos

Loving mama to Aden (8/5/2010) and DSD (15).
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#4 of 4 Old 02-06-2012, 04:38 AM
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Feel free to join the other thread here. smile.gif

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