When your little one HATES that you work ... and maybe you do too ... - Mothering Forums

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#1 of 4 Old 02-28-2012, 08:59 AM - Thread Starter
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My son is 4 and a half. Even though he's very outgoing and loves people, he wants to be with me all day. Since before he could talk, I knew this is how he felt. And since he started talking, I've never heard the end of it. Sometimes it's playful and I explain that we need money, yada yada, and he seems to see my point. But other times he is inconsolable, at school during the day or in the mornings when his dad is trying to get him to preschool. Every night he tells me he doesn't want me to go to work any more. His younger sister doesn't seem to mind the situation at all.


Because I work extremely early hours, I'm actually able to get a good 3-4 hours each afternoon/eve with the kids, which feels like a luxury, and I dedicate my weekends to them. But it's not nearly like being home all the time. My mom was home with me and I loved it. But I earn 75% of the income in our household, so my not working would be a huge financial impact.


Anyone else have kids like this? It makes me so sad. I'm trying to figure out how to find a balance between what we all want/need. He's going to kindergarten next September, so soon he wouldn't really be able to stay home all day with me anyway. (Homeschooling is not the plan! :) I know he'll be fine. But honestly, I don't really love my job. I'm doing it for the money. So that makes it worse.


Happy for any feedback.

Mother of two since 2007 and 2009. Hoping third time's a charm in 2012.

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#2 of 4 Old 02-28-2012, 02:35 PM
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Same thing here and nothing to be done about it. I work because I have to and I pay for the best childcare I can afford. Add to that the stress of my MIL constantly wanting more time with my kids on my my weekend time etc and it drives me crazy.

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#3 of 4 Old 02-28-2012, 11:10 PM
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My son is 4 and has normally been fine with his preschool situation, but lately he's been saying he wants to stay at home with me... "I want a break from school, Mom" or "so-and-so doesn't go to school.... her mom stays with her all day!" (That last one was the heart-breaker this morning when he was musing about the fact that not ALL 4 year olds' mom's go to work/school and his best friend stays home with her mom.) Ugh. It's been a couple weeks now that he's been doing this... not wanting to let go when I drop him off in the morning, crying about wanting not wanting to go pretty much the entire car ride there. It's tough, I know! hug.gif 


I haven't been able to do this at my son's school (at least not yet) but I know the thing that was a huge help with my older child was me volunteering in her class. Just having me there with her, in *her* school environment was great. Would your work schedule allow something like that, even just an hour a week? (assuming the preschool would allow it... if not maybe something to think about for kindergarten?) I do remember having to be very clear before going to her school with her about how long I was staying and when I had to leave, etc. to avoid any confusion or difficulties when I did have to go.

Single student mama to dd 5/04 and ds 11/07.


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#4 of 4 Old 02-29-2012, 08:29 AM
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LittleGriff, I could have written your post.  Every word except I don't have a second child (yet).  Because we could never afford for me to stay home I fantasize about working 4 days and having 3 day weekends.  Whenever it's a holiday weekend, I feel so much more balanced.  But again, I haven't been able to work that out financially.  Could you compress your schedule at all? 

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