Difficulty concentrating at work after losing 18wk pregnancy - Mothering Forums

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#1 of 3 Old 08-01-2012, 11:32 AM - Thread Starter
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The baby loss forum doesn't seem very active, and I need thoughts from working mamas in particular, so I'm posting here.


I lost the baby almost 6 weeks ago now. I took one week leave and cried the entire time. When I went back to work I was relieved at how calm and "normal" I felt. Since then it's gotten more difficult though. I'm having a very hard time concentrating or getting anything done. (My job is purely mental: think, talk, write are my 3 primary tasks, in that order.) If I could, I would like to take more leave, but I don't know what I'd do while on leave anyway. And leave just means more work to be done later.


I just wish I could hit the pause button on life. I don't know what to do with myself, but doing nothing doesn't feel all the great either. Maybe a counselor would help? It's not normally my cup of tea ...



Mother of two since 2007 and 2009. Hoping third time's a charm in 2012.

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#2 of 3 Old 08-01-2012, 03:16 PM
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I lost my daughter at 17 weeks and honestly, if not for being bombarded with multiple equally significant life crises (starting 3 days post-loss) back-to-back, I'm not sure what I'd have done.  I was just blindsided.


There's no question you could probably get some leave (possibly paid leave).  I'm not sure what you'd do with that time, either.  Are you working with a therapist?  I am now that I'm able to breathe and process.  I'm also not working full-time.  But I wonder if they might help you lay out a game plan for time off if you need it.


Also, realize that your body may just not be back to normal yet.  Six weeks is a guideline.  Our bodies are individual.  My body was physically "off" for almost a year.  Mentally?  Hard to tell given the circumstances.  



Heather - Wife , Mommy  & Health & Wellness Educator, Speaker & Consultant 
Dairy, soy & corn free with limited gluten... yes, really. And journeying towards peace.  Blogging about both.
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#3 of 3 Old 08-02-2012, 07:32 PM
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Somsorry for your loss mama. I don't think there is a "right" thing to do right now. Some days it will be easier to drown ur self in work, others to let yourself cry. A counselor might be good. Could you talk to your employer and ask for lenience with taking time off unpredictably while you process? I can only hope they would be understanding. Many hugs to you mama.

Married to overworked  DH reading.gif since 2003, happily familybed1.gif mama to DD (01/09) and  babyboy.gif DS (4/12)

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