Ambivalent about WOHMing after YEARS of SAHMing - Mothering Forums

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#1 of 7 Old 09-18-2012, 10:01 AM - Thread Starter
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I used to love working, and resisted staying home with my kids at first.  Then life and career threw some curve balls and after a difficult transition to SAHMing I grew to really, really love staying home with my kids, especially the last few years. Now my youngest is in first grade, and our master plan was for me to go back so we can pay off debt and save for college and retirement. I am interviewing for a dreamy job, but it does not pay very well and I am wondering if it is worth the extra stress in our life. I am finding myself somewhat ambivalent about jumping back into the workforce. I'd like to work through my ambivalence before the interview and would love to hear from folks who faced a similar impasse and are happily working again.


What questions did you ask yourself? Any books you'd recommend?

mom to an 11yo entomologist, a 9yo skateboarder, and expecting #3 (8/1/15)
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#2 of 7 Old 09-18-2012, 10:28 AM
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I'm in a different spot. My eldest just went to college and the youngest only has a couple more years of high school. My kids need me more now to be the wage earning mom because that is the money that will pay the college tuition. Yes, I'm nervous but I also know that being home with my kids was a great gift and now its time for all of us to "grow up and move on".

But to your specific question, I would find a low paying job NOT to be worth the hassles you'll face being gone and away all day. On the other hand, I too have had to take something smaller than I'd like just to get my resume back in shape. Sometimes baby steps are required.
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#3 of 7 Old 09-18-2012, 07:51 PM - Thread Starter
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Thanks for your reply, Philo Mom!

mom to an 11yo entomologist, a 9yo skateboarder, and expecting #3 (8/1/15)
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#4 of 7 Old 11-22-2012, 01:47 PM
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I say if your job would just be icing on the cake for your household income DO TAKE the dreamy job and save the pittance. Get going on the retirement and college fund. You want to start out with something you love because it will be worth the hassle. Then as they get older build on that and get a better paid position as the kids are older.

Kids. I got two of 'em.
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#5 of 7 Old 11-26-2012, 07:53 PM
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Can you find the elements of your dream job in something higher paying? Does the dream job prepare you for more pay/promotion/etc. in the next couple of years? What makes it "dreamy"? Flex hours? Close to home? Job duties?

Tracey, mama of 5 beloved children here with me on Earth and one precious son I will meet again in Heaven 6/17/09 - 9/6/09.

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#6 of 7 Old 01-02-2013, 10:13 PM
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I had to go back to school and work after 17 years at home. I had no choice since I got divorced. It's tough, every day it's tough, but I do it.

46-year-old single (divorced), self-employed working, home schooling, mommy to:

19 y-o
12 y-o (private school)
5 y-o (home schooled)
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#7 of 7 Old 01-06-2013, 08:49 PM
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I recently got a job in a great company after being self-employed for 2 years.  Dh and I still have our business, so I kinda have two jobs.  


It took a while to get the hang of it.  I had to try a few different schedules (my new company has been amazing about it).  I really truly hated it for the first two months.  I almost quite a few times.  But the fact is that we have a lot of debt and a lot of financial goals that just can't be met on the income of our business alone.  

Now that I have gotten used to it and gotten better at my job, I like it much better.  I would still prefer to be working for myself, but that just isn't possible right now.  


I really think that, for most people, if we try really hard to look at the positive parts, we can make it through.  Not that it won't be hard, but it can be done and you might find that you love what you are doing.

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