Hi mamas! I am a new mom to a wonderful 4-mo-old boy. Currently I am staying home, which I mostly enjoy (except for being on-call about 5 days a month at a local birth center, where I am a doula/birth assistant). However, due to finances, I cannot keep doing this long term, plus I do desire some time away from FT mothering to recharge and have adult interaction. I am an RN and I have been offered a school nurse job at a local high school (actually it's where I went to high school!). The job is FT, however they have offered to let me job-share with another RN so that I could only work 3 days a week and have more time with DS (I have expressed worry about being away from him 40/hrs a week). I'm just having a really hard time deciding what to do...
If I do the PT option, I think I would find it the perfect balance of time with DS and time at work. I think it would be very fulfilling in that way. (I would also continue to take call at the birth center once a week, so if I got called to a birth, I would be gone for part/all of that 4th day too. This would allow me to still be a part of birth work, which I really love). The drawbacks I see to taking the job as PT are that I think it may be annoying to share the work with another nurse (I can foresee myself wanting to do it all "my way" and being irritated that I can't be THE nurse), and of course the financial drawback. My working 3 days a week and attending a birth or two a month at the birth center would be enough money for us to stay in the black and save for retirement/college, but it would not be much cushion (actually the cushion would money from the births, which would just vary month to month, I could get zero births, I could get 5).
If I do the FT option...the only thing holding me back is 40 hrs/wk away from DS (but that's a big deal to me). Granted, he will be 8 1/2 months old when the job starts in August. And thanks to my husband's very flexible work schedule, he would be at home with DH nearly all the time I was at work, except for about 10 hours/wk he'd be with grandma (my mom). AND, since it's a school job, I'm done every day at 3, which means I'm home by 3:30 and would have a few hours with DS before his bedtime (and then of course, there's Xmas and spring breaks and summers off!). AND, the school is being really cool about the possibility of my DH bringing DS to see me every day at lunchtime to nurse him and visit for a short while. And the job itself would be awesome -- I know the school/people and love them, plus, as far as nursing jobs go, school jobs are the CREAM OF THE CROP! I don't think it's likely I could ever find this sweet of a nursing job again (I was chosen over 129 other applicants for this coveted job!) Obviously I would make more money/we could save more, perhaps to the point that when baby #2 or #3 comes along, I could quit working if I wanted to. As I type out all of those perks, I really feel like I am whining. (So if you were reading this and thinking that -- yes, I agree with you! I know so many, many mamas who have to go back to work at 6 weeks and utilize a DCP, whether they desire to or not). I guess it's just that I always thought I would be a SAHM, and most of my friends (who have kids) are SAHMs, and that's just the culture that I'm used to. And I get teary-eyed (ok, flat out cry) over the thought of missing his first steps, first words, etc. And even thought I know that my working FT wouldn't "screw up" my son, I still worry about that because, well...don't new moms worry about everything? ;) I guess the only other downside to me of the FT nurse job other than less time with DS is no longer attending births (I wouldn't want weeks of working 6 days a week. Now, if they'd let me just work at the center in the summer, that would be clutch!).
I hope this is the right forum to post this in...I'm still figuring out my identity as a new mom and I'm not sure yet if I have the "soul" of a SAHM, a WOHM, a WAHM, a PTWOHM, etc. I just know I'm struggling a lot with this decision and would love some advice! Thank you!!! (I have to let the school know by Monday).
I work part-time as a pharmacist. I love working part-time but I wouldn't want to work full-time. I tried it out actually, working 4 days a week over the summer when my husband was only teaching part time (he teaches at the college level) and I didn't like the amount I was away and the inattention that the house got. I really feel that having both parents working full-time is too much for our household. And I feel like I get plenty of time with my daughter while still getting to get out of the house and interact with adults. I wouldn't want to be a SAHM. I think I would go stir-crazy. This balance works for me/us.
I know so many, many mamas who have to go back to work at 6 weeks and utilize a DCP, whether they desire to or not). I guess it's just that I always thought I would be a SAHM, and most of my friends (who have kids) are SAHMs, and that's just the culture that I'm used to. And I get teary-eyed (ok, flat out cry) over the thought of missing his first steps, first words, etc.
You clearly don't want to work full time, so I would just stop even considering that. It seems you are really considering part time vs. SAHM. Once you work that out, if you indeed do want to work then JUMP AT THAT CHANCE!. As a nurse who works in the community I know how hard it is too get a part time job! Where I work school nursing is almost only immunization programs, you work out of a public health clinic regular office hours, you do not actually work day to day in the school, or work school hours. almost all part itme jobs in the community here are job shares, it's not that big of a deal. I work casually, that is another option, but I have to be really careful of working enough so I don't lose my liscense, and I can't pay into a pension, so I definitely take a hit financially. On the other hand I can pick and choose when I work, I never work the weeks my child have off of school, I work as little as possible in the summer. When I have less to do I work more. I have full control over my hours. I will work this way until all my kids are in school. If you take this job and it is permanent, you have set yourself up very nicely when your child is school aged, if you follow the school hours, you will never have to scramble to find child care when the kids are out of school. If it is 3 days a week, only when school is in you will be working less than 50%, that is a dream job!
The other thing to consider is how the job share works. I have seen them work 2 ways in different nursing unions. One way it that someone wants to cut back their hours, and gives up part of that position, so each person owns 50% (or whatever% was decided on) of the position, the other way is that the person cutting back, gives up part of the position, but it is not permanent, they "own" the position, so at some time in the future they can take it back, leaving the second person with no job security. I would check into just what kind of job share they are offering.
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