I need your help finding Jesus - Updated! DP has found Jesus! - Mothering Forums

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#1 of 94 Old 01-03-2009, 11:26 PM - Thread Starter
 
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I'm packing away the Christmas decor today. Even though I'm a UU I collect nativities, I'm just such a birth junkie I love the story. I have a cool little brightly painted wooden one that is made for children, and my kids love to play with the pieces. So anyway my 1y/o DD was gifted a jack in the box for Christmas. My almost 5 y/o DS discovered it was great fun to put something on top of the jack in the box turn the handle and launch said item across the living room. Are you seeing where this is headed? Poor baby Jesus, went flying behind the couch. DP saw it hit the wall and slide down behind there. We can't find him. We've pull the whole couch out we've pulled all the cushions off we've looked with a flashlight under every table within ten feet of the couch.

I need help from any intuitive mama out there. Help me find Jesus before I finish packing away the Christmas decor. Please!

Thanks!


**** SEE POST #72 for UPDATE****
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#2 of 94 Old 01-04-2009, 01:08 AM
 
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Sounds to me like...........wait for it............................


















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#3 of 94 Old 01-04-2009, 01:22 AM
 
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Is he stuck in the windowsill? Heat vent? curtains? baseboard?

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#4 of 94 Old 01-04-2009, 01:27 AM
 
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Originally Posted by artgoddess View Post
Poor baby Jesus, went flying behind the couch. DP saw it hit the wall and slide down behind there.
Congratulations on being the first person to ever put these words together in a sentence.

It certainly is a testament to the curiosity of young children.
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#5 of 94 Old 01-04-2009, 01:54 AM
 
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At least it didn't put out anyone's eye when it went flying...Talk about being blinded by your faith!

Sorry, horribly corny, I know

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#6 of 94 Old 01-04-2009, 01:59 AM
 
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Lol, do you have a cat that may have seen Jesus bouncing off the wall behind the couch and then caught him and ran?


Check the inside of the couch, not under the cushions but the gap between the backrest (is that what its called?) and the seat where the cushions are on. I once found piles of legos in our couch once. They couldn't fall through because of the material on the back facing the wall was sewn closed. It could've slipped through into that gap when you were removing the cushions
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#7 of 94 Old 01-04-2009, 02:08 AM
 
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Yes, maybe your cat found Jesus!


Ahem. You started it...

(Have you looked in the bible?

(
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#8 of 94 Old 01-04-2009, 02:10 AM
 
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My youngest hid the Holy Mother in an end table drawer today. I can't help you find your Jesus though, not a little wooden one anyway.

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#9 of 94 Old 01-04-2009, 02:34 AM - Thread Starter
 
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No cats. DP is allergic. no baseboards, no heat vents.

I'll see if I can get my hand between the back and the seat of the couch, under the pillows. I get what you mean, Wednesday. Jesus was missing for a couple days when MIL was over we had a good laugh about it when DP found him under the couch. She joked about how she had been trying to get her son to find Jesus for 44 years, and even Catholic school didn't do it, but all it took was a green sofa.

I can't believe DP let him launch the thing. I had already told DS not to send Jesus hurdling through the air, and as soon as I left the room he says, "hey daddy, watch this!" DP didn't expect him to disappear completely so he didn't look right away. Maybe he got stuff into the couch. Oh and as I packed away the Christmas decor tonight I discovered we are missing a Shepard as well. Sigh, maybe he's out searching for Jesus.
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#10 of 94 Old 01-04-2009, 02:48 AM
 
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Originally Posted by artgoddess View Post
Oh and as I packed away the Christmas decor tonight I discovered we are missing a Shepard as well. Sigh, maybe he's out searching for Jesus.


I had no idea what to expect when I first opened this thread but I'm dying here!

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#11 of 94 Old 01-04-2009, 02:51 AM
 
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Late one night, a burgler broke into a house.
As he tiptoed through the living room, he heard a voice say:
"Jesus is watching you!"

Nothing happened, so the burgler crept forward again.
"Jesus is watching you" - said the voice.

The burgler stopped dead in his tracks.
He looked around.
In a dark corner he spotted a bird cage with a parrot in it.

"Was that you who said Jesus is watching me?" he asked.

"Yes" said the parrot.

The burgler breathed a sigh of relief, then asked the parrot,
"What\'s your name?"

"Clarence" answered the bird.
"That's a dumb name for a parrot," sneered the burgler.
"What idiot named you Clarence?"

The parrot's answer:
"The same idiot who named the Bulldog, Jesus."
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#12 of 94 Old 01-04-2009, 03:02 AM
 
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Ok my vote was for a heat vent...but never mind!

The rest of these are hilarious!!!

I bet he turns up...say around Easter??


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#13 of 94 Old 01-04-2009, 03:11 AM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Peppermint Leaf View Post
Late one night, a burglar broke into a house.
As he tiptoed through the living room, he heard a voice say:
"Jesus is watching you!"

Nothing happened, so the burglar crept forward again.
"Jesus is watching you" - said the voice.

The burglar stopped dead in his tracks.
He looked around.
In a dark corner he spotted a bird cage with a parrot in it.

"Was that you who said Jesus is watching me?" he asked.

"Yes" said the parrot.

The burglar breathed a sigh of relief, then asked the parrot,
"What's your name?"

"Clarence" answered the bird.
"That's a dumb name for a parrot," sneered the burgler.
"What idiot named you Clarence?"

The parrot's answer:
"The same idiot who named the Bulldog, Jesus."
:


I heard that joke several years ago (maybe it was 2001?) by an elderly member of the pet parrot club I was a member of. He had a new joke every time the club had a meeting, but that one I actually remembered. The only difference was the dog in his joke was named 'God' and the dog's breed was a Rottweiler.

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#14 of 94 Old 01-04-2009, 03:20 AM
 
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Jesus is never missing, you need only open your heart to the Lord and you shall find him.

Sorry... I've just heard that so many times I couldn't help but repeat.

Any plants in the vicinity he might have gotten trapped in?

Other then that, no advice. Except maybe prayer.

P.S. Reading this thread gave me a good laugh. I love corny jokes.

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#15 of 94 Old 01-04-2009, 03:46 AM
 
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We have a Playmobil Nativity set and so Baby Jesus does double duty.

Here are phrases I've uttered in the last month:

"I think Baby Jesus is upstairs in the airplane."

"Stop! You can't force Baby Jesus inside Mary.... Yes, I know he hasn't been born yet, but we'll just have to pretend about the pregnancy and birth, OK?"

Can you set up the jack-in-the box with another like-sized object, coat it in paint and follow the trail?

Pray to Saint Anthony (finder of lost things)?

Have you looked:
Behind/under bookshelves
Under the couch (as in turned it upside down to see if he got stuck to the bottom of the couch)
Under the edge of the carpet?
In other boxes of Christmas stuff?

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#16 of 94 Old 01-04-2009, 03:51 AM
 
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Have you tried a stable? sorry

We have a Fisher-Price nativity set that we got for the kids to play with after the angel from the Precious Moments set had it's head knocked off.
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#17 of 94 Old 01-04-2009, 03:54 AM
 
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Sorry, your thread title made me think of this Jesus

Maybe it's in the rug*???


*for any The Big Lewboski fans

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#18 of 94 Old 01-04-2009, 03:55 AM
 
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:

Do you have an Evangelist in your area? I think they're pretty good at helping people find Jesus. I'll be : for you.
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#19 of 94 Old 01-04-2009, 04:10 AM
 
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I'm getting him behind something X like or behind a door.

Is there any chance he got hung up/caught on something and didn't hit the ground?

Until I read your post that he was lost after being launched, I honestly thought someone had taken him and put him in a dollhouse.

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#20 of 94 Old 01-04-2009, 04:14 AM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by bigeyes View Post
Is there any chance he got hung up/caught on something?























:

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#21 of 94 Old 01-04-2009, 04:31 AM
 
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I know!

But I totally see him stuck behind something door like or X like, and since she said he sorta flew.....


As for that wandering shepherd.....do you have any pets, by any chance? If not, look where there might be stuffed animals. He's got his own little flock somewhere.

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#22 of 94 Old 01-04-2009, 04:37 AM
 
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Hope you don't have a dog that found it? If so...it'd get a bad case of MANGEr

Oh yes. It WAS that bad!

Maybe it's fallen into a shoe? Jesus does have a thing for soles...*ba-dum-bum*

I'll think of more...they're coming to me slowly...:

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#23 of 94 Old 01-04-2009, 06:10 AM
 
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I have nothing. But this thread is hilarious!

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#24 of 94 Old 01-04-2009, 06:54 AM
 
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wait three days and see if he rises again.

Mom to 10yo Autistic Wonder Boy and 6yo Inquisitive Fireball Girl . December birthdays.

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#25 of 94 Old 01-04-2009, 10:02 AM
 
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Reminds me of the bumper sticker: "I found Jesus. He was behind the sofa the whole time".


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#26 of 94 Old 01-04-2009, 10:08 AM
 
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What a bunch of wise guys we are... thinking we can find the baby jesus.
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#27 of 94 Old 01-04-2009, 11:51 AM
 
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:laughup: :

I am trying so hard to laugh quietly because my DP is still sleeping and I can't help it, I'm still laughing so hard I'm starting to snort!
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#28 of 94 Old 01-04-2009, 01:02 PM
 
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What a bunch of wise guys we are... thinking we can find the baby jesus.
Funny. And I am reminded of Will Farrell's brilliant prayer to sweet baby jesus.

OP, I hope you find Jesus. I'll pray. :
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#29 of 94 Old 01-04-2009, 01:31 PM
 
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I wonder if lighting will strike this thread...

OP- remember you can probably find a new Jesus on Ebay if you need to.

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#30 of 94 Old 01-04-2009, 01:45 PM
 
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^ I can hear it now on the news... "Woman buys Jesus on eBay for $5".

:

I wondered why this thread wasn't in the Religion forum! Hahaha. ROTFLMAO @ the "Maybe your cat found Jesus" comment.

Reminds me of Robin Williams saying (in his New York stand-up special) how he'd love to answer the door naked when people solicit at his door asking "Have you found Jesus?", and reply to them, "No, wanna come help me look?"

-
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