Help edit an email please - Mothering Forums

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#1 of 10 Old 08-24-2009, 10:27 AM - Thread Starter
 
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I am a burned out middle grades teacher seeking other employment. I applied for 3 separate positions at a local college here back in July and have heard nothing from them other than a stock "We got your stuff" email. I have decided to write an email to the HR Director. This is what I have so far:

At the beginning of July I submitted applications for three positions at ____. On July 2, I received an email stating that you had received the applications. On July 21, having heard nothing, I sent another inquiry and was told that it would be the next week at the earliest before interviews would be set up. Since then I have heard nothing.
As I met the qualifications for the job I was very surprised not to be interviewed. However, I was even more surprised when I was not extending the professional courtesy of “Thank you for your interest but the position has been filled,” or “Thank you for your patience in this long process.”

I would appreciate an email or a phone call letting me know the status of the positions.



What do you think? I am not satisfied with it but cant figure out why...

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#2 of 10 Old 08-24-2009, 10:42 AM
 
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uh..ya..don't send that. criticising the manners of a potential employer..NOT the way to land a job.
Keep it upbeat, professional, positive. not all accusatory and on this date, etc, like you are filing a customer service complaint.
THANK them, let them know you are still hoping to hear fom them, etc.
(good luck!)

CPST
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#3 of 10 Old 08-24-2009, 10:46 AM
 
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I'm thinking that letter is not a good idea, either. If you were in a "maybe" pile, it would move to you to "no" pile, methinks. Chances are, they have received 100-300 applications for each of those 3 positions, and they simply don't have time to reply personally each one.

You could rewrite that entirely and ask if the positions have yet been filled.
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#4 of 10 Old 08-24-2009, 10:49 AM
 
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DON'T DO IT!!

I understand how frustrating it is to not hear anything back, but this won't help. Trust me.

It is *not* standard to receive any kind of "no thank you" or rejection. If you hear from them, they're interested. If you don't hear from them, they are not interested or they haven't decided yet.

But it can't hurt to reply back something like "I am extremely excited about this opportunity which is perfectly suited to my skills and experience. Please let me know if you would like to discuss this further, my phone number is _______". It is good to appear enthusiastic.
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#5 of 10 Old 08-24-2009, 11:33 AM
 
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Another one here who wants to urge you NOT to send an email or letter like that!

Instead, write more along the lines:

I am inquiring about the application I sent for X position on X date.

As a former middle school teacher, I feel I have many skills that will be very beneficial to your company. For instance,.... (highlight a few skills that will transfer nicely to this new position. Dealing with a variety of people from different backgrounds and ages? Keeping organized, detailed files? Organized, long-term planning skills)

Because (name of company) is such a leader in...., I'd love to be a part of the team. I am available for an interview at your convenience to discuss the skills and enthusiasm I could bring to ....... You can reach me at ( number ).

Thank you for your consideration, and I look forward to your call.

Sincerely,


And I would print it out old-fashioned, stamp and mail, style and send it in.
I used to help do the hiring for a school, and these letters got much more attention than any upset letters (those just got tossed). And it DID make us go back and reconsider someone we might not have. Good luck in your search.

"We think we're gliding down the highway when in fact we're slip sliding away." Paul Simon
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#6 of 10 Old 08-24-2009, 11:49 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Thanks everyone!! Maybe the tone was what was bothering me about it. I didn't mean for it to sound snarky at all; I just really wanted one of those jobs (They were all very similar so I applied for all three of them) and am hoping that maybe they are just taking a loooong time deciding on interviews.
I will work on a rewrite that is not so accusatory, as that was not my intention.

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#7 of 10 Old 08-24-2009, 01:19 PM
 
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I agree with everyone -- YIKES!!! Not the impression you want to make on a potential employer. Companies don't have time to send "no thank yous" to every applicant, especially these days when they're being flooded with resumes from all the newly unemployed. I would send a short, upbeat message like,

Good afternoon,

I applied for three positions (list them here) on your campus in July. As I'm eager about the prospect of working for your school, I thought I'd inquire about the status of those positions. Would you be so kind as to let me know whether they're still available, and if so, is there a time frame for when you anticipate beginning the interview process?

Thank you for your time, and I look forward to the opportunity to meet with you to discuss how my skills would complement your campus work environment in the near future. (Please find attached a copy of my resume and cover letter submitted in July.)

Warm regards,
Name

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#8 of 10 Old 08-24-2009, 05:57 PM
 
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I like the last suggestion above.

Sometimes it's good to run an email past someone else for *cough* passive-aggressive undertones!

Unless you get caught in an automated phone system, I'd call or go in to speak to someone, actually. Once you actually have a person who knows who you are, and has seen your smiling face, it can make a difference.
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#9 of 10 Old 08-25-2009, 03:27 AM
 
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Glad you are not going to send your original version. I think it would have ended any chances you may have had.

I also like the idea of a snail mail letter rather (or even in addition to) an e-mail. And it couldn't hurt. (So long as it is upbeat and worded right.)

Any misspellings or grammatical errors in the above statement are intentional;
they are placed there for the amusement of those who like to point them out.
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#10 of 10 Old 08-25-2009, 12:48 PM
 
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I want to second some of the other posters who suggested a very upbeat tone to the email.

I applied for a job last September and by the end of October still had not heard from the company. I sent a really upbeat - "I'm really excited to pursue this..." type email to the HR person. She replied that they weren't quite ready to hire yet. So, a few weeks later, I sent another one - again really positive. And lo and behold a week later got the call that I was getting an interview.

I think if you pursue it in a positive tone and really seem excited, that's great.

Good luck, though I'm sorry you're so burned out at teaching! We need all the good people we can get!
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