Do you hate facebook? - Page 3 - Mothering Forums

View Poll Results: Does anyone else hate facebook?
Yes, I hate facebook too! 41 20.60%
No, I Love facebook! 126 63.32%
other 32 16.08%
Voters: 199. You may not vote on this poll

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Old 11-09-2009, 11:51 AM
 
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Originally Posted by Kirsten View Post
If you don't want to have a status update, you leave it blank. Lots of people do. No biggie. No, I don't think you should post that - unless you want people to think you are.... uh, rude?

I understand when you have the occassional person who updates with something stupid like "M is cooking pasta" (one I actually saw Honestly, who cares?) but people do post stuff that matters - to them and to their friends. Kind of falls under "if you don't have anything nice to say..."
Kirsten, you are right. I guess that is why I didn't do it. Another poster mentioned her mother having cancer and that souring her internet experiences. I have a lot of big issues, as well. One smaller one is feeling very nauseous every day, and I guess I am secretly mad (or maybe it is not a secret! ) at these people with their seemingly frivolous updates. You are playing Mafia Wars while I am constantly vomiting! How insensitive!

Mainly I get mad at my sister who constantly has time for FB, but who never calls me anymore even though I am super sick and DH is out of the country. (poor me!) So, you see, my problems with FB run deep!

On another note, I also don't like cell phones. I have one for emergencies or calling DH if we are not home when he gets there. But, I get really bothered by how people separate themselves from society by constantly talking on the phone. When trying to navigate through the grocery store with my two kids, I can no longer say anything to other people at the store like "Oh, excuse us" because the other people aren't connected to me in any way. They are busy on the phone. The other day, I couldn't maneuver my giant pregnant body around the pay counter to grab my little boy who ran around it and another shopper's cart was blocking me. I tried to say excuse me, even touching her shoulder. She just shook my hand off her shoulder, looked irritated and pointed to her phone! She very nearly experience extreme pregnant lady rage! Can you beat that?

Anyway, manners. I hope that they are not on the way out, but it is looking that way!

Jean, happy HS mom to Peter (5), Daniel (9) and Lucie (2) and also someone new... baby.gif
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Old 11-09-2009, 02:06 PM
 
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Originally Posted by LionTigerBear View Post
I love it. My extended family is mostly all on it and we can finally keep in touch daily-- instead of how we used to, which was like once every couple of months. We can even have spontaneous group chats together, on our own time, whenever we have a free moment. Of course, I also have tons of other friends on there, old high school buddies, even my long lost best friend from when I was 8.

P.S.-- I hit "hide" on my wall for anything cluttery that I don't like seeing constant updates on-- most games and aps, old high school buddies that I don't need to see constant updates from, lol-- they all go to "hide" and then I can just look them up on their pages when I feel like it. My wall is very uncluttered and streamlined, just like I like it! Facebook is designed to be easily personalized to your interests. I also have it set up so that all of my FB friends go in different categories, and then if I only want to check up on "family" or "church friends" or "MDC friends" for instance, I click on that category and get only those people's updates and info. Nice!
i do the same thing!!! so funny and i facebook

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Old 11-10-2009, 07:59 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Originally Posted by Kirsten View Post

And classmates/reunion sites are now requiring payment to see info. I haven't been back since that change. Facebook is the bomb!!!!!!

So what are you going to do when facebook decides to start charging fees? I didn't see anywhere in the TOS where they had a guarantee that it would always be free.

I remember when PayPal came out, their BIG selling point was that it was FREE for everyone to use. And it was. Free for buyers, free for sellers. Then one day down the road after everyone was already addicted, and they had enough users, they decided to start charging sellers. Boy was I pi$$ed. Mostly because they had so strongly emphasized the "free" part of using their service, and then they went back on their word.

I think its a very likely possibility for facebook.. Another is continue to offer a "basic" service for free, and then if you wanted to use additional advanced options or features, you would have to pay.

Update:

I went into my account again recently and discovered a few additional things I don't like or that shocked me.

One was that they apparently think it is ok to know your "password" on other sites (besides facebook) -

I clicked on a window that said "find people you email" (apparently they think I'm not smart enough to go into my email account and look through my address book to get their email addressses) and there were fields for

"your email:" and
"email password:"

My password to sites stays with me, and I don't share it, not even with other sites I use. (It even says on most sites NOT to share your password with anyone)

Another thing, which was even more shocking:

There was something new on my relative's page, it said something like:


"*(my relative)* likes *(her friend)*'s album"

And there were 3 photos there.

I was able to see these photos from her friend's album - even though I was NOT her friend! The only person I have right now on my "friends" list is my relative. That's it!

So I previously thought (incorrectly) that, aside from people's "profile" pictures (I learned I could see a little profile picture even from those who were not my friends) I would not be able to see any other pictures they posted online to their facebook accounts.

WRONG! I was shocked to find out, I could click on the little pictures in my relative's facebook page, and the pictures of her friend would enlarge full size, and I saw this person (who I did not know, but it was my relative's "friend") and their spouse and child in various photos!

IT also showed their real name, of course, since most people are using their real names there.

So I was horrified to realize, that, suppose I had decided that I'd be really cautious and only use facebook with a few of my very closest relatives or friends (let's use 3 for an example) that even though I choose to share photos with only 3 people, that if each of those people have 200 "friends" my photos could potentially be shared online with 600 people, if all 3 of my friends "like my album."


I'm hoping that I'm wrong, and maybe there is a privacy setting that this "friend" did not click on that would have made her photos private, even if someone on her friends list "likes her album". Maybe she chose to make them viewable by people who are NOT on her friends list. Or maybe she just doesn't know that. (you would think it would be set to private by default)

Maybe someone can help me understand that bit better. Obviously, it makes me want to never put a photo on facebook, if I can't even control who has access to it.


Finally, this part in the TOS disturbed me a little bit, and they certainly didn't make it very clear or give any examples on what they meant by it:

"Facebook may also collect information about you from other sources, such as newspapers, blogs, instant messaging services, and other users of the Facebook service through the operation of the service (e.g., photo tags) in order to provide you with more useful information and a more personalized experience."

Apparently, it wants to know as much about you as it possibly can, not only from your own facebook page and that of all your friends, but from any other source it can get its hands on.

I appreciate the detailed reply from several people on how facebook works regarding the various options and how you can set them. I think I need to reread those replies several more times yet, because I'm still not quite sure what it all means lol I'm still learning and poked around my account to find some of these settings. Maybe someone can help me specifically find the one (if there is one) on how or why I was able to see this strangers' personal photos even though I was not connected to them in any way. (well, we apparently have a mutual friend- my relative- and I guess that was enough of a connection for facebook to think it was ok to share those photos with me?!?)

"All that is necessary for the triumph of evil is that good men do nothing." -Edmund Burke (1729-1797)
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Old 11-10-2009, 08:11 PM
 
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Originally Posted by newmum35 View Post
I'm hoping that I'm wrong, and maybe there is a privacy setting that this "friend" did not click on that would have made her photos private, even if someone on her friends list "likes her album". Maybe she chose to make them viewable by people who are NOT on her friends list. Or maybe she just doesn't know that. (you would think it would be set to private by default)
That can be changed bu going to settings, click on privacy settings, then on news feeds and wall, and then uncheck everything that is checked. nothing should appear on your wall except for the things you "fan" and your status updates. And let others know to do this aswell so that when they like a picture their pictures won't show up on someones wall and are protected from strangers.
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Old 11-10-2009, 08:18 PM
 
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After all the privacy stuff I have been hearing, i am really contemplating just sticking with my e-mail. haah!
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Old 11-10-2009, 08:54 PM
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Originally Posted by newmum35 View Post
So what are you going to do when facebook decides to start charging fees? I didn't see anywhere in the TOS where they had a guarantee that it would always be free.
If facebook decides to charge (I don't think they will) then I can decide whether I want to pay or go somewhere else. Not something I worry about now. There are already things you can pay for.
Quote:

One was that they apparently think it is ok to know your "password" on other sites (besides facebook) -
Well, it's a choice. If you're that concerned about the safety of your password, you can choose not to use it. If the convenience of having all of the info from your email accounts moved to facebook for you is more important, you can make that choice. Choices are good...
Quote:
I was able to see these photos from her friend's album - even though I was NOT her friend! The only person I have right now on my "friends" list is my relative. That's it!
That all depends on how the person sharing the photos set up the privacy settings for that photo album. When I took photos of the vice presidential debate coverage at my university, I made them public, because they weren't personal. I have a set of photos I took in Morocco that I made visible to Friends and also Friends of Friends, because a lot of the photos were of other people... that way they could tag themselves in my photos and let their friends see too. Again, choices...

When (if) you put photos on facebook, you'll find a dropdown menu with privacy choices and you can set them however you want them...

 
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Old 11-10-2009, 09:04 PM
 
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i voted other because i don't love it or hate it, i used to go on it loads but now i find it boreing.

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Old 11-10-2009, 09:07 PM
 
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I'm sure I would pay for facebook, if that's what it came down to. I pay for membership here, on another board, and for online services such as picnik, and netflix (we only watch instant plays.)

newmum, I would play with your privacy settings. You should be able to customize it so friends-of-friends can't see a pic your friend 'liked' or linked - but I haven't really tried. Or, I would probably not post any personal pics you wouldn't mind the whole wide world seeing, b/c you take that chance any time you upload pics to the Internet - even w/private emails. Lots of people just have cartoon type images, non-copyrighted photos from the web on their facebook. Or like my mom, no pics at all - including no profile pic- yet she still enjoys using it to communicate w/family, friends, and co-workers.

I don't think I ever entered my email and password to have FB pull up any other users who's addresses matched my contacts. It's not something you have to do to find friends, yk? I don't use much as far as apps or what-have-you, so I've never had the need to enter info on those, either.

It can be really simple, and similar to a regular email service -- but I can see how it's not only confusing, but seemingly unnecessary if you don't have any desire to use it.

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Old 11-10-2009, 09:17 PM
 
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Whenever I post family photos I set it to "friends only". You can set each albums privacy setting separately.

♥ blogger astrologer mom to three cool kiddos, and trying to figure out this divorce thing-- Blossom and Glow ♥

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Old 11-10-2009, 09:17 PM
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Originally Posted by newmum35 View Post

Another is continue to offer a "basic" service for free, and then if you wanted to use additional advanced options or features, you would have to pay.
You mean like Mothering currently does? You have the basic site that you can access for free but if you pay a fee then you get certain perks that you wouldn't be able to access otherwise.

What would I do if Facebook started charging and didn't offer a basic free package? I'd figure it out if it happened. They're not the only game in town right now and they won't be the only game in town in the future, there will always be someone somewhere who has a better idea or service to offer.

As far as the photos you saw of your relative's friend, they don't have their privacy settings set to your standards. Either it's because they don't know they can increase the security and be more selective about who sees what or they don't care. For better or for worse not everyone is as concerned about internet safety or privacy. You can set your privacy settings so as many or as few people as possible can see your pictures, your profile info, whatever. What others do is up to them. My settings are set so only my friends can see my pictures and albums, nobody else. If I wanted to I can go through and create various lists with groups of people and assign certain levels of access to those lists. So if I wanted only my relatives to see my pics I could group them all into one list, give them permission to see my pics and everyone else would be out in the cold. It's as public or as private as you want it to be, which is a far site better than a public messageboard such as this.

If you don't want to give out your e-mail address or password then don't. I've never used the Find a Friend feature and yet I have plenty of friends and I get what I want out of this service. It's an option available to you, it's up to you whether or not you want to use it. Some people would rather have the convenience of letting Facebook look through their address book, especially if they've got hundreds of contacts in there. Some would rather not give up that level of privacy or security. Use what you want and leave the rest. Same as you would do with any suggestions or information you receive here or any other messageboard or forum.

Yes, they want to know everything they possible can about all of their members. It's the most effective way they have to tailor their marketing. You can charge more if you can tell an advertiser that they are guaranteed that a certain number of people who may be interested in that product will see that product. It's called good business which is what Facebook is first and foremost. The ads you see here on Mothering are tailored to the audience that is most likely to frequent a site such as this, Facebook isn't much different except they can tailor it even more. If it weren't for the ads then Facebook wouldn't be able to earn money which means they either would shut down or they would start charging for the service that they're providing.
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Old 11-10-2009, 11:37 PM
 
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I love it! We have friends and family all over the world and it's a great way to keep up with people on a regular basis. We still call just as much, if not more as before.
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