unconventional wedding? tell me about yours! - Mothering Forums

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Old 03-15-2010, 11:40 PM - Thread Starter
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We're getting married!

Tell me about something you did unique or unconventional that you remember fondly. Please?

Could you also please add something you wish you had done differnt or skiped altogether? If there is anything of course!

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Old 03-15-2010, 11:49 PM
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I don't know if it's considered unconventional per se, but the big hit at my wedding was my mom's gift to my hubby. He and his family are very, very proud of their Scottish heritage, so my mom hired a bagpiper to play the wedding march as I walked down the aisle. It was a total surprise and my hubby, his 4 brothers and their dad all cried (they all deny it though).

It was a really special memory for us.

ETA: Congratulations! I love, love, love weddings! Enjoy this time - it's pretty special.
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Old 03-15-2010, 11:55 PM
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I am getting married Wednesday. It will be myself, my fiance, and the JP (well, and a butt-ton of feral cats and whoever is having a late lunch ) at Beason's Park in Columbus, Texas. We are going to walk down to the banks of the Colorado River and do it. I will be wearing a red off-the-rack dress and gold ballet slippers (flats, in other words), and DF will be wearing jeans and a pearl-snap shirt. We have made a conscious effort to strip it down to the bare necessities.

(My girls were supposed to be there, but their father decided to take them for Spring Break at the last minute. That would be the one thing I'd change--I'd have made darn sure we scheduled it better!)

We plan to have a "reception" of sorts this summer, hopefully also at Beason's. That will be, really, just a BBQ. There won't be a cake, but brownies instead (strange as it sounds, they have special meaning for us), and other than the first dance we don't plan on having any dancing. There will, however, be a bouncy castle and some coloring pages for the children. We decided early on the emphasis will be on party instead of on wedding (this was back when we'd thought to do the two together). That means no silliness like save the date cards or table assignments or favors.

My advice is to sit down with your fiance and decide what's important to the two of you, and realize that EVERYTHING ELSE is negotiable.

Sabra: Mama to Bobbie (3/02), Linda (1/04), Esther (10/05), Marie (11/10), & Douglas (11/12)

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Old 03-16-2010, 12:00 AM
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OK, you asked for it! (I could go on and on here, so I'll try to keep it in check.)

We rented an old farmhouse on the ocean for a week. We invited only immediate family, who all had to travel pretty far to get to Maine. We weren't living here at the time, but we knew we would be soon. So there were 20 guests. We had the ceremony outside and we had written our own vows. Everything about it was pretty DIY. I made the invitations with a little Chagall print on handmade paper. I made floral headpieces for me and the flower girl. Our "recessional" if you even want to call it that (it was a pretty informal affair) was the Grateful Dead's "They Love Each Other." The ceremony took place right next to what was once a beautiful walled garden that is now overgrown with wildflowers, so I was planning on picking flowers that morning. But a friend who ran a flower farm brought over a bouquet that morning as a gift, so I mostly used those. Dinner was on the front porch of the farmhouse, and MIL made her amazing homemade lasagna. We hired a friend to make salads appetizers. Another friend made blueberry spice cake.
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Old 03-16-2010, 12:02 AM
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We had a wiccan handfasting in my mom's back yard with a (mostly) homemade buffet. We rented a slushy machine for margaritas and bellinis that was the best part
Dh cut the cake with a sword, that was neat too. Our favours were little jars of honey.

What I would have done differently or skipped: I would have gotten the money together to pay someone else to take care of the food and clean up, or delegated better. I also would have skipped the favors, since we forgot to hand them out anyway.

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Old 03-16-2010, 12:23 AM
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Originally Posted by weliveintheforest View Post
I also would have skipped the favors, since we forgot to hand them out anyway.
I've gotta be honest, I don't get favors. I don't go to a wedding wanting to take something home with me. Maybe I'm weird like that. The ones at my brother's first wedding, coincidentally, were also the exact same thing we had at my senior prom (Hershey's Kisses wrapped in cellophane to make "roses"). That probably colored my opinion.

Sabra: Mama to Bobbie (3/02), Linda (1/04), Esther (10/05), Marie (11/10), & Douglas (11/12)

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Old 03-16-2010, 12:23 AM
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We rented a big cabin in the mountains for a weekend, and had our friend who is a Unitarian minister to come down from NJ and do our ceremony. There was also a lodge for guests to say at as well.
It was wonderful, we were married in front of the cabin ( we brought rented chairs) in the meadow, and then had a big party with family and friends. We had little white candles set up all over the porch as night fell and the music went on. LOL Our cabin had plenty of bedrooms for the wedding party (including a private suite for us) and a pool and a hot tub. My parents rented a smaller cabin for themselves nearby and watched the grandbabies in it one night. Then after the weekend wedding Dh and I went off for a week of traveling the area on our honeymoon.

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Old 03-16-2010, 12:23 AM
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Not sure if this counts because it was technically after the wedding, but it was what really made the day "us": We went to a kind of skeezy bar in our fancy clothes just to use their photobooth right after the wedding. Our first couple of anniversaries, we made it a point to go back for more photos. We lost track of doing that on our third anniversary because DD was only a few days old at that point.

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Old 03-16-2010, 12:48 AM
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We had a campground wedding. We rented out a big group site and everyone camped out with us for 3 days. We didn't want a formal thing so we insisted that everyone must wear tie dye. We also didn't want gifts, but since we knew people would buy us stuff anyway we asked for people to buy us the ugliest or tackiest thing they could find.

We really just wanted a fun, casual event and that is what we got. The big bonfire at the end of the night was so much fun!


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Old 03-16-2010, 01:02 AM
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We had a sunrise ceremony on the beach. I actually made ppl wake up at 5:30AM to watch me get married. It was very small, only immediate family. No bridesmaids or groomsmen. I was in a white Banana Republic summer dress, dh was in a white linen shirt and linen pants. We were barefoot.
We released butterflies, had a steel drummer playing music. I co wrote the ceremony with the guy I found on line that did the ceremony:
That's him and his site and the ceremony we wrote. He has changed it up a somewhat.
We had a Krispy Kreme donut teir with a bride and groom on top for the reception, along with Mimosas and coffee.

The only thing I would change is that I didn't have any sort of photographer, so there was no really nice photos taken.

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Old 03-16-2010, 01:12 AM
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My wedding was pretty conventional, aside from my dress. I wore a custom made (by my momma) rainbow dress. It was something that I'd wanted for a long time and it totally fits my personality. The rest of the decorations and everything were tied into the rainbow.

Elizabeth wife to Matt , mom to Logan (2/21/01) , and little man Desmond (9/23/08)

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Old 03-16-2010, 01:26 AM
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The part I loved the most was incorporating my son into our ceremony. He was part of the invitation and a major part of the vows. It was awesome.

If I could go back, I would have skipped using my nephew to do the music. It was rather cheesy. We did everything on the cheap and made good decisions with other things but I thought he had a level of prowess as a DJ that just wasn't there.
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Old 03-16-2010, 01:45 AM
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We got married at the top of a mountain. Our guests took the gondala up, then we followed a few minutes later. Our walk "down the aisle" was from the gondala to the vantage point overlooking the valley and Mount Washington in the background. It was wonderful to have 10 minutes absolutely alone on the way up and down to just embrace where we were and be together. We had 10 guests there and we all went for lunch after.

Then 2 days later, my lovely mother in law threw our wedding party with all the family and friends. We wanted something small on our day, and this let us have the family celebration and still have our intimate, meaningful private ceremony. We dressed up in our wedding clothes again, so everyone got to see us. I love that I got to be a "bride" twice and wear my beautiful dress again.
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Old 03-16-2010, 10:35 AM
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We had some traditional Filipino elements which are unusual for some people I guess. My veil was pinned to his shoulder and the cord (shaped like a figure eight) encircled us.. the priest handed dp coins collected from the family and he passed them to me (symbolizing sharing the wealth).
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Old 03-16-2010, 10:52 AM
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Nothing too unusual but we got married oceanside in Hawaii by a barefooted minister. He was a pretty cool dude. We had a handful of people there (inlaws, my Mom, and three really good friends). I am not one for large events and I wanted to use most of our $$ to buy a house. It was perfect for us.

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Old 03-16-2010, 01:00 PM
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We got married right in the L&D room at the hospital as I was in labor with our first. We had plans to go to a JOP that day, but DS decided to make an arrrival instead.

We have nothing of that day - except for our fuzzy memories ( I was on an epidural) and a picture of our witnesses. The video didnt come out, I was out of it, DH was stressed, hospital green is not a flattering color on me... etc..

We've decided to do a 5 year renewal of our vows (hopefully after we're done having kiddos) and able to really celebrate our love with each other & our friends and family.

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Old 03-16-2010, 01:07 PM
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We took the kids on a road trip to Sedona, AZ and got married by wedding rock (or chapel rock or something?). It was ok. The person we hired was like 2 hours late and kept changing the time, so I'd research who did the officiating better next time. Her speech was totally cheesy, too. I should have double checked what she said. I wanted it non-religious but we giggled the whole way through it.

There were also people recording a yoga video in the background which was hilarious. It was nice to get married on our honeymoon and spend most of the money on that instead of a bunch of tuxes and flowers, etc. Plus having the kids involved in a beautiful place was nice.

So notes to self:

1. heavy satin with a train is not fun in the desert.
2. get a well reviewed officiant
3. make sure there's no movies/pictures being taken when you're at a state park.

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Old 03-16-2010, 01:17 PM
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Got married in the back room of a pizza place. (We're the first, and so far only, people to do that!) Had the ceremony in front of a big "anarchy" poster advertising an art show (at the last minute, we noticed the poster that was there had a mostly-naked woman with strategically placed electrical tape--also for the art show--and management covered it). After the ceremony, we had pizza, pasta, and salad for 35 (family, out-of-town friends, and a few very close local friends).

As for the ceremony, we included a reading from Goodrich v. Mass. Department of Health (the court ruling that legalized same-sex marriage in that state), gave a necklace to my husband's daughter to incorporate her into the ceremony and into the new family, and wrote (well, more ad-libbed) our own vows.

That night--big party at our house for the rest of everyone (including the work people, neighbors, other friends, and the people you feel if you invite A and B, you have to invite C, but already that's too many people for the tiny pizza place). 90 people (ranging from infant to 70s in age) in and out over the night! We had a tent put in our yard (you know you can get a 400-square-foot tent, plus tables/chairs/patio heater/lamps, put in your yard without ever talking to anyone? Gotta love the Internet.) We hired a crepe cart to make crepes, and got some hors d'ouerves from a local organic grocery store. I made cupcakes and cookies and we bought a bunch of wine and a keg of beer. There were people in our house until 2 a.m.(!), some stayed outside and played guitar around the fire pit that someone got us as a wedding gift. Kiddo made it until about 1 a.m. and fell asleep in a friend's lap. Still managed to get leftovers packed up and in the fridge/sent with friends, the tables and chairs stacked for the rental company, and conceive our son that night.

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Old 03-16-2010, 05:11 PM
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We had our wedding at a B&B's event center, which was this huge nice barn. My dad cooked a pig, we had a potluck, made a mix CD the night before. It was very simple, cheap, and I wouldn't change a thing.

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Old 03-16-2010, 05:28 PM
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Dh and I got married at the courthouse on a friday afternoon. Ds1 was almost 5 yrs old and he held the rings. Ds2 (2 yrs old) was also there, along w/my mom and dad, and dh's brother. It was wonderfully simple. I wore a dress that was teal and cream, which fit my personality much better than the big fluffy weddng dress I wore for my first wedding.

We went to a restaurant w/everyone after that and had so much fun drinking and eating and talking.

It was a wonderful day.

Wife to dh, Mommy to ds1 12/2002, ds2 9/2005, and ds3 9/2008.
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Old 03-16-2010, 05:39 PM
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First time: went to Vegas! Totally planned. Just us, a big white dress and a tiny chapel. It was awesome. Never had any regrets...well, except for the choice of groom.

Second (and last!) time: I said let's go get married on an island somewhere. He said he wanted the big, traditional wedding. We decided to do it but throw a kick-ass party. Things we did I am really glad we did:

-arranged for a hospitality suite the entire weekend at the hotel - this was a huge hit as we had lots of out of towners

-arranged for transportation from hotel-church-reception-hotel for everyone

-threw a cocktail party reception: no assigned seats, no centerpieces, no cake, just a big party with lots of great food (tapas), drinks and music

-didn't do bridesmaid dresses or standard tuxes. Told everyone in the wedding party to wear black.

-didn't do big flowers, decor, centerpieces, head table, cake, etc etc etc. Didn't miss any of it!

-threw a pajama-pizza party at the hospitality suite after the reception

-we also had pipers as DS was in a pipe band at the time. We had the pipers pipe us out of the church.
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Old 03-16-2010, 06:20 PM
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The unusual things:
My dress was purple
We were both barefoot
We walked down the aisle together

We had a small backyard ceremony, and afterwards we all went out for BBQ - at the place where we went for dinner the night he first told me he loved me (and vice versa).

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Old 03-16-2010, 08:09 PM
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We got married in a labyrinth! DH walked in to the middle first, and then I walked in. Our ceremony was with us in the middle (minister and guests outside and surrounding us), just based on the book of common prayer. We walked out together. It was really a very spiritual and moving ceremony.

This is the woman who married us:

I don't know these people, but we used the same reading... except we stopped after the first paragraph:

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Old 03-16-2010, 08:22 PM
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I got married in England by a Registrar. On the winter solstice. Wearing a floor length charcoal grey velvet gown. Oh, and we got to the registrar's by a cab (awful cab ride.)
We were almost late to our own wedding.

We (and some of our guests) laughed during the ceremony because the Registrar sounded like the priest in the Princess Bride (mahwage). We thought he was joking at first but, Nope, it was his real voice.

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Old 03-16-2010, 09:10 PM
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We got married on a ranch in the Rocky Mountains.

My mom made my dress out of purple silk. I had fake flowers in my bouquet (which I still have, and I love it). I made our wedding cake (2 tiers!). DH wore a kilt. For the reception, we had burgers and smokies, BBQ-d on site, as well as veggies and dip, salads, etc.
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Old 03-16-2010, 09:48 PM
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we got married at a local park with a big fountain and manmade waterfall then had our reception at a small chinese restaurant. There were about 20 guests. A friend played flute music at the park. We didn't have any music or dancing at the reception- we did have an amazing meal- similar to what you would have at a chinese new year banquet and lots of good champagne. I put together flowers myself and wore a non wedding dress although it was white and pretty- not bridey at all.

I loved our wedding and think it was simply perfect for us. The only things I would change are little things like my shoes and the bouquets- I put them together with no clue how to do it and they just looked very handmade. Pretty flowers though


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Old 03-16-2010, 11:29 PM
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We had our reception before we got married because, long story short, it just worked out that way. I call it our Preception. We got married at the Justice of the Peace the next day. Since it was the 2nd marriage for both of us, we specifically requested no gifts; instead, we had a potluck (which as fabulous!) and I asked everyone to bring one flower. I had several vases of flowers and from that made my bouquet the next day. We had live music from all our friends who are musicians and dancers and we had lots of great dancing. My DH's sister gave the toast which was really sweet.
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Old 03-16-2010, 11:41 PM
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We got married behind a small B&B overlooking a bay in Maine with our closest family and friends in attendance (about 15 people total). We were going to do it on the rocky shore, but it got a teeny bit sprinkly that day and we didn't want to risk a downpour. The ceremony was performed by our wedding planner who was also a notary. She did a beautiful, simple job.

After the ceremony we went into the dining room of the B&B and had cake and a champagne toast. The we all headed to a restaurant that had a fantastic view of the sunset over the harbor and ate delicious Maine seafood.

I did wear a white wedding dress, nothing elaborate, but it was a wedding dress, and my husband wore a suit. Everybody else was pretty casual. There was really little planning involved on my part, our wedding planner took care of everything. She chose gorgeous flowers in all of my favorite flowers and the cake was decorated to match that. She also helped choose the restaurants for a big get together the night before the wedding, then the day of the wedding. It was the most wonderful, low-stress affair ever. I really wish we could go do it again!

Candace - Mama to Molly (02/06), Max (06/08) and Maggie (03/10)
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Old 03-17-2010, 02:56 AM
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We got married in our backyard when I was 3 months pregnant. It was immediate family for the ceremony and then about 55 people for a reception. The only traditional "wedding" thing we did was have a gorgeous cake made.

The thing I would have done different? Either skipped the keg altogether or made sure DH wasn't cooking at the grill (and therefore standing next to the keg all day lol). He got pretty drunk...but at least we had fun. LOL!
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Old 03-17-2010, 11:48 AM
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Originally Posted by Logan's mommy View Post
My wedding was pretty conventional, aside from my dress. I wore a custom made (by my momma) rainbow dress. It was something that I'd wanted for a long time and it totally fits my personality. The rest of the decorations and everything were tied into the rainbow.
That is such a cool idea! I love the rainbow dress.

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