How concerned should I be? Long-(Police/CPS) - Mothering Forums

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#1 of 74 Old 09-20-2010, 08:15 PM - Thread Starter
 
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So DH had to go out of town late Thursday night, about 11pm, to make a 4 hour drive to his parent's home. His mom isn't doing well and he's helping his dad out. He left me with the little girls (9, 2, newborn) and of COURSE all hell broke loose.

Our 2yo has been having MAJOR separation anxiety since I had to stay in the hospital with our new baby (she was born at home, but at a week old developed cyanotic apnea and severe GERD and swallowing/feeding issues so We were in the hospital for a week.)

Since then her sleep schedule has been totally erratic, and she has panic attacks and MASSIVE temper tantrums.

So she woke up at 2am Thursday, realized DH wasn't there, and proceeded to scream. And scream. And scream.

She fell asleep in my bed at 7am and woke up at 9am Friday. She was reasonable for a few hours and then something didn't go the way she wanted (she's a normal 2yo after all!) so she started screaming again. She screamed this blood curdling scream for HOURS. Nothing worked. I tried EVERYTHING. And, of course I forgot the windows were open. In the midst of this she wet her pants and I had to clean her up, which set her off even more.

She would stop screaming for a few minutes here and there, and during the breather (as long as we left her alone) she'd start to calm down. She also managed to find the paprika, dump it on the living room floor, find her sister's nail polish and paint her foot blood red (and the wall, of course), and get into her dad's cable ties, hiding them everywhere. She's not normally like this, and of course once she did these things I'd take something away and she'd flip out again and start the screaming.

Because of the upset, my newborn was a mess, fussing and crying constantly from 2am until about 8pm, other than when she was sleeping amidst the noise. I was wearing and/or holding her as much as possible, but it was pure chaos.

At 5pm someone rang my doorbell. I had JUST gotten 2yoDD settled enough to let me lay down with her and was trying to get her down for ANY nap so I could catch a break. DD came and told me it was the same neighbor who had seen her take out the trash earlier and asked her who all was home. Since I was home alone with the girls, I had no interest in getting up w/DD to possibly get her screaming again and deal with some nosy and/or creepy neighbor. The door rang twice and then stopped.

5-10 minutes later the ringing continued, then the pounding on the door started. It was LOUD and I was terrified, so were my girls. I thought the door would break! I texted DH and he said to stay put and not go to the door, and if they didn't leave to call the police.

DD looked out her bedroom window and said "Mom, it's the police!"

I texted DH that it WAS the police, got 2yoDD to stop nursing (she started bawling again) and headed for the door. It'd been about 20 minutes since the first doorbell ring.

We have a security deadbolt on the front door. You have to lift the handle and turn the knob just so or it 'resets' and there's a whole other combo to do to get it to open correctly.

Of course I didn't do it right and it 'reset'. The whole time I'm talking to the police through the door and they're telling me to 'get outside right now'. I said "I can't get the door open!" and the officer said "there's officers downstairs at the back door, go outside NOW"

I was TERRIFIED. I had NO idea what was going on, so I look in my basement and there's an officer peeking in through the door (so he's IN my garage) saying 'is anyone home, hello, police!"

I said I can't get the front door open and he told me to come outside with him, I said I've got kids upstairs alone and he said "we know".

We stood in the garage and I asked "what on EARTH is going ON?" at which point the officer (there were three in my garage and three out front) says there was a call out of concern for my children's welfare.

WHAT?

I immediately said Ohhh I have a toddler who's been screaming nonstop, and I offered for them to check on the kids. Immediately SIX officers came in the house.

Please understand my house is usually clean and under control. Not that day. They immediately see a massive red stain on the carpet by the stairs, where the paprika incident occurred (made worse by my 9yo helpfully trying to wash it out with WATER). The officer goes over to look at it and I said "it's paprika' and he didn't say anything. There was two big baskets of clean laundry, one on the coffee table and one that had dumped over on the couch, because I'm washing clothes from being out of town all last week (we got in Tuesday night). We're out of granola so there's two big batches of granola dishes, plus breakfast, and lunch dishes on the counter in the kitchen and I've got dinner cooking on the stove. I went to the grocery store late Thursday night, so there's still some things out from that on the kitchen table that need to get put away.

The Memory game that had kept my 2yo entertained for a few brief moments was still scattered in the hallway (that was the compromise, she wanted it in the bathroom ). My room didn't have the bed made, and there's 'unpacking stuff' all over my room as I was trying to get it all put away from the trip. So it's ziplock baggies of bathroom supplies, baby stuff from the trip, that sort of thing. It's not really cluttered, definitely not dirty, just more messy.

They check EVERY SINGLE ROOM looking for....I don't know what. They ask to see 2yoDD who has FINALLY fallen asleep on the bed. Of COURSE there's no sheets on the bed, 2yoDD yanked them off in a fit of unholy terror and she was collapsed on a naked mattress with her blankie. Asleep. Finally.

Remember the blood red nailpolish all over one foot? Yeah.

And the (cali-king) mattress is on the floor because we're trying to help DD get used to sleeping in a regular bed with her big sister, and she rolls off the bed easily. So for now, the mattress is on the floor. When she's sleeping more calmly we'll put the mattress on the box springs (all our beds are like this, we're kinda short so it's easier than climbing up into a bed). But all the cops see is a toddler asleep on a naked mattress on the floor in a preteen's room. Now THAT room is a mess. 9yoDD has clothes on the floor, stuff everywhere, messy kids room.

Oh and my bathroom. It's clean, no worries there. The house was clean, actually, just 'new baby, just got back from trip' messy. BUT. In the bathroom? A quart sized ziploc baggie of herbal bath soak blend for postpartum mamas sitting on the back of the toilet. Except that's not what people would really think it is, on first glance, now is it? A cop was in my bathroom for about five minutes, and it's a TINY bathroom. TINY. If he turned the baggie over he'd see the homemade label (Postpartum Herbal Soak), but I don't know if he did.

Next to the bag were...of course...the 'bracelets' DD makes out of the cable ties. Two tiny little wrist sized cable/zip tie bracelets.

They start asking me questions, what happened, why didn't I answer the door, who all lives here, how many kids are there etc. Once they look through the whole house they all come back down the hallway and congregate in my kitchen doorway. Then one officer tells four of the others they can leave. His partner asks my 9yo what school she goes to (homeschooled) and what she did for school today (she said NOTHING! We were writing and playing math games while DD was watching Kipper that morning!), what happened to her face (red popsicle-EVERYWHERE around her mouth), what her sister's names are, how old they are, who else lives here, do we have any pets, what does she do for fun, etc. The whole time the other officer is asking me questions too.

I did say repeatedly that 2yo's having major adjustment issues with the new baby, and that she doesn't normally do this, I stressed that we don't hit, we don't spank, nada. I said I'd tried to calm her down, but the only thing she wants me to do is hold and nurse her ALL DAY LONG and I can't when I have to feed and care for the baby, and make meals, at the least. So at some point she's just going to scream and there's nothing I can do. He said "I understand"

He filled out an index card with my name, dob, social security number, drivers license, the whole nine yards, and said he had to write a report, then they left.

Should I be concerned about a CPS visit after this? They didn't ask ANY questions about the bed or anything, but I was in a sleep deprived haze so my answers weren't really the best. Example-"Why do you think she's screaming so much" Me-"Because her dad just left". Nope, didn't explain he's coming back THAT NIGHT. Just said he'd left. Nice.

I *did* manage to say that I couldn't clean with her screaming and tearing things up, so that's why laundry wasn't finished and dishes were everywhere. He said "I understand". When they left he said "Sorry for disturbing you" and I said "No problem, I understand you have to check these things out".

So how concerned should I be that CPS is going to show up? Once DH got home he played with 2yoDD and I got the house clean in an hour, even took pictures (his idea) so it was obvious it was clean the same day they came out. They didn't seem incredibly concerned, didn't wake up 2yoDD, but then again that just means they didn't see anything criminal to be concerned about.

Thanks if you made it through this massive wall-o-text tldr...today (Monday) came and went without hearing from anyone, which seems to be a good thing. But jeezus THAT was stressful. Ugh.

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#2 of 74 Old 09-20-2010, 08:24 PM
 
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I think it's possible that CPS could turn up for a visit. I would keep the house clean, the kids clean, the cupboards stocked with food, examples of homeschool work your dd is doing, etc. Obviously, they didn't see anything that made them think the kids were in immediate danger, or they would have had CPS out there that night removing the kids - but they might see you as someone who was overwhelmed and needs intervention and/or services. I'd brush up on local CPS laws and figure out what your best options and your rights are should CPS show up at the door. I'm sorry you had such a crappy day.
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#3 of 74 Old 09-20-2010, 08:37 PM
 
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I have no idea about the CPS stuff, but what a sucky day!

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#4 of 74 Old 09-20-2010, 08:41 PM
 
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s mama!

sorry had to run off... i sure hope they dont show up! it sounds like you dont need another thing on your plate! i am so sorry this all happened to you!

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#5 of 74 Old 09-20-2010, 08:43 PM
 
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You poor thing! I would expect a visit from CPS to be honest. It's their job. The whole naked 2 year old on a bare mattress on the floor is probably going to sound suspect to them (but I totally understand, my 3 year old is like that as well, every day I pray CPS won't come knocking on my door because of the screaming he does).

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#6 of 74 Old 09-20-2010, 08:53 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by limabean View Post
I have no idea about the CPS stuff, but what a sucky day!
: :

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#7 of 74 Old 09-20-2010, 08:59 PM
 
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Where I live CPS has waaay bigger fish to fry. Your groceries weren't put away but you had groceries. Your dd had taken the sheets off the bed, but she has a bed. You obviously have things for them to do, otherwise there wouldn't be a game on the floor. You cook as evidenced by the dinner on the stove.They may come, they may not but honestly you had a bad day and a nosy neighbor.
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#8 of 74 Old 09-20-2010, 09:05 PM
 
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oh my! despite the serious nature of your post, I couldn't help but laugh.out.loud about the suspicious looking items all about and the mayhem with the screaming! Had it not been a call to CPS this could have been a comedy skit. Not that it feels at all funny right now, but honestly you might keep this story a while and eventually have a nice laugh out of it when it all blows over.

My guess is that they've seen far worse, and once they'd ascertained the handful you've got and that it was not actually blood all over, they saw you with the pity you deserved, hence the "sorry to have bothered you" thing.

Perhaps it was just that the screaming kept the neighbors up! I know I called in a few years ago--screaming kept me awake all night and just too darned sleep deprived and alone with dd in the house to go over myself--and it was just a teething kid I think.

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#9 of 74 Old 09-20-2010, 09:08 PM
 
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Hmm, I would expect a follow-up visit. It does seem like your house and home were in a complete uproar that day/night. If I were the social worker, reading the cop's report, I would want to check on you again to make sure that it wasn't like that all the time.
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#10 of 74 Old 09-20-2010, 09:40 PM
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i think that the officers will write up a report, and unless they saw something really extreme, likely will not call CPS. if CPS does come, you can do what they said above, and also tell them all that you told us about DD's issues since you were in the hospital with the baby, having her father away for the day triggering a particularly difficult episode for her, and so on.

i'm sure you'll be fine.
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#11 of 74 Old 09-20-2010, 09:47 PM
 
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I wouldnt worry too much about it. Years ago my son went missing, and we lived on lake front property. I was absolutely frantic looking for him, I went through the house and trashed everything! (I ripped all the clothes off the hangers and threw them into the middle of the bedrooms, I took all the pots and dishes out of the lower cabinets and tossed them onto the floors, ect), then called the police. The house was TRASHED, but the cop didnt call CPS like I totally expected him to. (BTW, he found my son hiding behind the couch)
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#12 of 74 Old 09-20-2010, 10:05 PM
 
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What a nightmare! My thoughts are with you. I hope CPS doesn't bother you at all. What a really awful, stressful experience for you. I'm sorry.

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#13 of 74 Old 09-20-2010, 10:12 PM
 
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The two times I have had to deal with CPS for my brothers kids, the cops TOLD us they were going to call CPS...

Granted we were on the other side of it (not the ones reporting their parents, but the ones taking the kids when their neighbors reported them) but they were there and they were the one they told.

I dont know if they generally do that, but that was my experience with it.

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#14 of 74 Old 09-20-2010, 10:17 PM
 
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I would be worried but I think you'll be fine since your house is not normally like that. I would definitely keep things extra tidy and gather homeschooling stuff for proof. What a terrible day.

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#15 of 74 Old 09-20-2010, 10:19 PM
 
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I'm so sorry.I hope CPS doesn't bother you.My ds,even at 9yo,is still a screamer.We've had the police called on us a couple of times but nothing ever came of it.And my house isn't exactly perfect.

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#16 of 74 Old 09-20-2010, 10:25 PM
 
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Such a hard day!

Any misspellings or grammatical errors in the above statement are intentional;
they are placed there for the amusement of those who like to point them out.
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#17 of 74 Old 09-20-2010, 10:34 PM
 
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I would expect at least another welfare check. I probably would have called someone under the circumstances too - she/he had no ideas if your child was in pain or anything like that.

The first poster had it right - make sure there is food in the pantry/fridge, clean clothing, plenty of diapers (cloth or sposies) and wipes for the baby, etc. Take the garbage out regularly. Make sure you can show clear evidence of HSing, etc. I have friends that work in CPS - they DO have bigger fish to fry, but they have to investigate anyone that's reported, so they may well come out and give you the all clear.

I think we all have days were we wouldn't want anyone checking out out houses - anyone with kids will agree.

The constant screaming and hysterics is a bit much for even the most ornery 2 year old - is she overly anxious normally? If you haven't already, definitely look into methods of calming/soothing her, even before Daddy leaves for work. Maybe he can do a voice recording of her favorite books for her to read along with when he's not home, or promise to call her if she can go without crying until lunch/dinner. If she doesn't have a lovey, now might be a good time to let her pick out a special animal or blankie to cuddle...perhaps Daddy can go with her to buy one, so she will associate it with him?
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#18 of 74 Old 09-20-2010, 10:43 PM
 
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I've so had days were I would cringe if CPS and/or the cops show up. 98% of the time my house is clean, the kids are fed and dressed and generally in good humor. However,

*Case in point, as I was responding my 3 yo started screaming at the top of his lungs. He busted open his eyebrow while jumping off the couch and had blood running down his face. I looked around and noticed all the couch cushions are in a pile on the ground (the kids took them off so they could jump on them), the dinner dishes are piled all over the kitchen, the toy room is a mess and my youngest is half naked (and it is raining and cold out).*

I have so had those days. I wouldn't be worried, but I would be prepared just in case.

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#19 of 74 Old 09-20-2010, 10:49 PM
 
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And this is why women should not be left alone with newborns during the early post partum weeks. Certainly not with toddlers and young children along with a baby. I hope they see it for what it is. May I recommend you invest in some Calm Child Tincture for your little one. I found it helps smooth the rough edges during these phases of toddlerhood.
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#20 of 74 Old 09-20-2010, 10:58 PM
 
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I hope that there is no further involvement with either CPS or the police.

And mama, you just need a ((hug)) and a massage, I'm sure. I cannot imagine the stress you felt all day long.
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#21 of 74 Old 09-20-2010, 11:11 PM
 
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Oh my goodness, what a day! I hope you get a nice bath tonight.

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#22 of 74 Old 09-20-2010, 11:24 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Theoretica View Post
So DH had to go out of town late Thursday night, about 11pm, to make a 4 hour drive to his parent's home. His mom isn't doing well and he's helping his dad out. He left me with the little girls (9, 2, newborn) and of COURSE all hell broke loose.

Our 2yo has been having MAJOR separation anxiety since I had to stay in the hospital with our new baby (she was born at home, but at a week old developed cyanotic apnea and severe GERD and swallowing/feeding issues so We were in the hospital for a week.)

Since then her sleep schedule has been totally erratic, and she has panic attacks and MASSIVE temper tantrums.

So she woke up at 2am Thursday, realized DH wasn't there, and proceeded to scream. And scream. And scream.

She fell asleep in my bed at 7am and woke up at 9am Friday. She was reasonable for a few hours and then something didn't go the way she wanted (she's a normal 2yo after all!) so she started screaming again. She screamed this blood curdling scream for HOURS. Nothing worked. I tried EVERYTHING. And, of course I forgot the windows were open. In the midst of this she wet her pants and I had to clean her up, which set her off even more.

She would stop screaming for a few minutes here and there, and during the breather (as long as we left her alone) she'd start to calm down. She also managed to find the paprika, dump it on the living room floor, find her sister's nail polish and paint her foot blood red (and the wall, of course), and get into her dad's cable ties, hiding them everywhere. She's not normally like this, and of course once she did these things I'd take something away and she'd flip out again and start the screaming.

Because of the upset, my newborn was a mess, fussing and crying constantly from 2am until about 8pm, other than when she was sleeping amidst the noise. I was wearing and/or holding her as much as possible, but it was pure chaos.

At 5pm someone rang my doorbell. I had JUST gotten 2yoDD settled enough to let me lay down with her and was trying to get her down for ANY nap so I could catch a break. DD came and told me it was the same neighbor who had seen her take out the trash earlier and asked her who all was home. Since I was home alone with the girls, I had no interest in getting up w/DD to possibly get her screaming again and deal with some nosy and/or creepy neighbor. The door rang twice and then stopped.

5-10 minutes later the ringing continued, then the pounding on the door started. It was LOUD and I was terrified, so were my girls. I thought the door would break! I texted DH and he said to stay put and not go to the door, and if they didn't leave to call the police.

DD looked out her bedroom window and said "Mom, it's the police!"

I texted DH that it WAS the police, got 2yoDD to stop nursing (she started bawling again) and headed for the door. It'd been about 20 minutes since the first doorbell ring.

We have a security deadbolt on the front door. You have to lift the handle and turn the knob just so or it 'resets' and there's a whole other combo to do to get it to open correctly.

Of course I didn't do it right and it 'reset'. The whole time I'm talking to the police through the door and they're telling me to 'get outside right now'. I said "I can't get the door open!" and the officer said "there's officers downstairs at the back door, go outside NOW"

I was TERRIFIED. I had NO idea what was going on, so I look in my basement and there's an officer peeking in through the door (so he's IN my garage) saying 'is anyone home, hello, police!"

I said I can't get the front door open and he told me to come outside with him, I said I've got kids upstairs alone and he said "we know".

We stood in the garage and I asked "what on EARTH is going ON?" at which point the officer (there were three in my garage and three out front) says there was a call out of concern for my children's welfare.

WHAT?

I immediately said Ohhh I have a toddler who's been screaming nonstop, and I offered for them to check on the kids. Immediately SIX officers came in the house.

Please understand my house is usually clean and under control. Not that day. They immediately see a massive red stain on the carpet by the stairs, where the paprika incident occurred (made worse by my 9yo helpfully trying to wash it out with WATER). The officer goes over to look at it and I said "it's paprika' and he didn't say anything. There was two big baskets of clean laundry, one on the coffee table and one that had dumped over on the couch, because I'm washing clothes from being out of town all last week (we got in Tuesday night). We're out of granola so there's two big batches of granola dishes, plus breakfast, and lunch dishes on the counter in the kitchen and I've got dinner cooking on the stove. I went to the grocery store late Thursday night, so there's still some things out from that on the kitchen table that need to get put away.

The Memory game that had kept my 2yo entertained for a few brief moments was still scattered in the hallway (that was the compromise, she wanted it in the bathroom ). My room didn't have the bed made, and there's 'unpacking stuff' all over my room as I was trying to get it all put away from the trip. So it's ziplock baggies of bathroom supplies, baby stuff from the trip, that sort of thing. It's not really cluttered, definitely not dirty, just more messy.

They check EVERY SINGLE ROOM looking for....I don't know what. They ask to see 2yoDD who has FINALLY fallen asleep on the bed. Of COURSE there's no sheets on the bed, 2yoDD yanked them off in a fit of unholy terror and she was collapsed on a naked mattress with her blankie. Asleep. Finally.

Remember the blood red nailpolish all over one foot? Yeah.

And the (cali-king) mattress is on the floor because we're trying to help DD get used to sleeping in a regular bed with her big sister, and she rolls off the bed easily. So for now, the mattress is on the floor. When she's sleeping more calmly we'll put the mattress on the box springs (all our beds are like this, we're kinda short so it's easier than climbing up into a bed). But all the cops see is a toddler asleep on a naked mattress on the floor in a preteen's room. Now THAT room is a mess. 9yoDD has clothes on the floor, stuff everywhere, messy kids room.

Oh and my bathroom. It's clean, no worries there. The house was clean, actually, just 'new baby, just got back from trip' messy. BUT. In the bathroom? A quart sized ziploc baggie of herbal bath soak blend for postpartum mamas sitting on the back of the toilet. Except that's not what people would really think it is, on first glance, now is it? A cop was in my bathroom for about five minutes, and it's a TINY bathroom. TINY. If he turned the baggie over he'd see the homemade label (Postpartum Herbal Soak), but I don't know if he did.

Next to the bag were...of course...the 'bracelets' DD makes out of the cable ties. Two tiny little wrist sized cable/zip tie bracelets.

They start asking me questions, what happened, why didn't I answer the door, who all lives here, how many kids are there etc. Once they look through the whole house they all come back down the hallway and congregate in my kitchen doorway. Then one officer tells four of the others they can leave. His partner asks my 9yo what school she goes to (homeschooled) and what she did for school today (she said NOTHING! We were writing and playing math games while DD was watching Kipper that morning!), what happened to her face (red popsicle-EVERYWHERE around her mouth), what her sister's names are, how old they are, who else lives here, do we have any pets, what does she do for fun, etc. The whole time the other officer is asking me questions too.

I did say repeatedly that 2yo's having major adjustment issues with the new baby, and that she doesn't normally do this, I stressed that we don't hit, we don't spank, nada. I said I'd tried to calm her down, but the only thing she wants me to do is hold and nurse her ALL DAY LONG and I can't when I have to feed and care for the baby, and make meals, at the least. So at some point she's just going to scream and there's nothing I can do. He said "I understand"

He filled out an index card with my name, dob, social security number, drivers license, the whole nine yards, and said he had to write a report, then they left.

Should I be concerned about a CPS visit after this? They didn't ask ANY questions about the bed or anything, but I was in a sleep deprived haze so my answers weren't really the best. Example-"Why do you think she's screaming so much" Me-"Because her dad just left". Nope, didn't explain he's coming back THAT NIGHT. Just said he'd left. Nice.

I *did* manage to say that I couldn't clean with her screaming and tearing things up, so that's why laundry wasn't finished and dishes were everywhere. He said "I understand". When they left he said "Sorry for disturbing you" and I said "No problem, I understand you have to check these things out".

So how concerned should I be that CPS is going to show up? Once DH got home he played with 2yoDD and I got the house clean in an hour, even took pictures (his idea) so it was obvious it was clean the same day they came out. They didn't seem incredibly concerned, didn't wake up 2yoDD, but then again that just means they didn't see anything criminal to be concerned about.

Thanks if you made it through this massive wall-o-text tldr...today (Monday) came and went without hearing from anyone, which seems to be a good thing. But jeezus THAT was stressful. Ugh.

I would have come over and offered to help you. Seriously.

I am sorry you had to experience that.
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#23 of 74 Old 09-20-2010, 11:25 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by homewithtwinsmama View Post
And this is why women should not be left alone with newborns during the early post partum weeks. Certainly not with toddlers and young children along with a baby. .
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#24 of 74 Old 09-20-2010, 11:54 PM
 
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*double post

ribboncesarean.gif cesareans happen.
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#25 of 74 Old 09-20-2010, 11:57 PM
 
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How scary! I would have been a nervous wreck (and still would be, wondering if someone was coming back for a follow-up). I'm sorry you had to go through all that, and I hope nothing else comes out of it.

I'm sure it was a well-meaning neighbor. Definitely keep your windows closed and your 2 yo as calm as possible (not always easy, I'm sure).


ribboncesarean.gif cesareans happen.
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#26 of 74 Old 09-21-2010, 12:27 AM
 
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Sounds like a concerned neighbour called.

I hope that the police don't get CPS involved, but if they do, have everything in order....

HUGS
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#27 of 74 Old 09-21-2010, 12:43 AM
 
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i hope you do get a visit from CPS. considering what the police saw and the complaints i am sure about baby crying whole day - i would at least expect one visit.

this is what i would do.

the issue here is SAFETY not so much cleanliness. you have already cleaned. dont over do it. make sure you dont have any past date food in the fridge or pantry. put any kind of chemically stuff locked or on high shelf.

the thing to do is babyproof your house. make sure they understand that YOU understand how to keep a safe house for a 2 year old AND infant.

dont freak really. i've had CPS on my back too. do NOT indulge any info about baby's health issues. NOTHING. they dont need to know. make sure everyone has a proper place to sleep and not cosleep. so playpen/crib for baby. borrow if you must.

they might interview your older dd. just to make sure she is not afraid of you guys, there is nothing suspicious and that she is not being tortured. they asked my 3 year old on her 3rd bday how she was disciplined.

if you still need time when CPS shows up (i would rather expect them to call you) dont let them in. call them and make an appt. THAT is your RIGHT!!! you dont have to let them in just coz they knocked on your door.

but OMG mama. your day sound straight out of a horror film. just coz its CPS doesnt mean the death knell.

remember it is SAFETY that is priority. babyproof your house as if you were going to open a daycare center.

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#28 of 74 Old 09-21-2010, 01:43 AM
 
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What an awful day.

Do you have any friends or relatives who could help you out for a few hours a day? Could you afford a postpartum doula? Perhaps a postpartum doula who's working on certification would be able to come help you out for a free or reduced rate.

If you contact DONA or CAPPA, they might be able to get you in touch with postpartum doulas in your area:

http://www.cappa.net/
http://www.dona.org

Midwife (CPM, LDM) and homeschooling mama to:
14yo ds   11yo dd  9yo ds and 7yo ds and 2yo ds  
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#29 of 74 Old 09-21-2010, 02:15 AM
 
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Oh my goodness! That's kind of hilarious in a terrible way - the paprika and lipstick stains especially! What a comedy of errors. You know... sorta.

I suspect the fact that you cooperated with the police and weren't aggressive about the visit will work in your favour. The policeman sounded nice, and surely they'd cut you some slack for having an obviously new baby? Then again, I don't know the system...

I hope your week gets better from here!

If decomposition persists please see your necromancer.

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#30 of 74 Old 09-21-2010, 09:27 AM
 
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What a nightmare! I hope that if they do visit, it's on a day where your home is spotless and your kids are on their best behavior.
Many hugs to you.

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