Frumpy? Yes or No? - Page 5 - Mothering Forums

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Old 10-21-2010, 11:35 PM
 
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What's impractical about it? A sweater offers more warmth than a tee shirt or blouse but sometimes you don't want or need long sleeves. I really don't get this one.

I also never understood the short-sleeved sweater thing. I mean, if it's cold enough to wear a sweater, wouldn't you want your arms covered so they don't get cold? And, if it's warm enough to wear short sleeves, its too hot for a sweater.

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Old 10-21-2010, 11:51 PM
 
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Ha! I was a PCV in a Muslim country as well - maybe that explains my knee-jerk aversion to ankle-length shapeless clothing...
Exactly. I was the daughter of an APCD in a Muslim country and I have exactly the same reaction. I still cringe at the thought of some of the dresses I wore as a teen living there and traveling with my father to visit PCVs.

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Old 10-22-2010, 12:11 AM
 
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I also never understood the short-sleeved sweater thing. I mean, if it's cold enough to wear a sweater, wouldn't you want your arms covered so they don't get cold? And, if it's warm enough to wear short sleeves, its too hot for a sweater.
It confounds me too. Like all those knitted summer dresses for tots. I can see the appeal - they'd be a quick knit without the sleeves - but what right-minded toddler would want to wear a knitted dress when it was hot, rather than a simple cotton one? It seems like the wrong craft for the job.

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Old 10-22-2010, 12:32 AM
 
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I like it, I would wear it. I guess I have frumpy taste.
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Old 10-22-2010, 12:33 AM
 
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Originally Posted by dawningmama View Post
I beg to differ.
http://www.flickr.com/photos/absnasm/3974988872/
http://www.flickr.com/photos/1519435...n/photostream/

Several of the beautiful women in the last group shot here:
http://www.youngfatandfabulous.com/2...ce-part-1.html

And a bunch more:
http://www.flickr.com/photos/34989853@N05/5057641687/

http://www.flickr.com/photos/34684653@N05/4901424877/

http://www.flickr.com/photos/suchmoo...-fatshionista/

http://www.flickr.com/photos/2918352...-fatshionista/

http://www.flickr.com/photos/sabrosa...-fatshionista/

http://www.flickr.com/photos/deervic...-fatshionista/

Fat women can and do wear skinny belts. And they can and do look fabulous in them. Happens all the time.

No woman owes it so anyone, ever, to be pretty or fashionable. If the OP likes that dress and likes how she feels in it, that's what she should wear. However, the OP also expressed a desire to wear things that are a bit more fashionable (or, at least, less frumpy). Fat women can be fashionable. Sure, the clothes can be hard to find, but they exist. And there are now fantastic communities online and IRL of fat women who are interested in fashion. Just google "fatshionista."

I'm sorry but we obviously have a difference of opinion on it and your links illustrate this perfectly.

I'll bow out now and leave it for the OP to decide if any of these looks are for her.
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Old 10-22-2010, 12:39 AM
 
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Sorry OP. I'm 33, heavy and I think that dress is the definition of frumpy.
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Old 10-22-2010, 12:47 AM
 
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It confounds me too. Like all those knitted summer dresses for tots. I can see the appeal - they'd be a quick knit without the sleeves - but what right-minded toddler would want to wear a knitted dress when it was hot, rather than a simple cotton one? It seems like the wrong craft for the job.
knitted summer dresses ARE made of cotton!

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Old 10-22-2010, 12:48 AM
 
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Yeah, sometimes (although I've seen them knitted of all kinds of things): but knitted cotton still isn't as light as woven. It's thicker, and knitting is pretty much designed to trap heat, isn't it?

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Old 10-22-2010, 12:49 AM
 
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Even this jumper is better than the one in the OP:

http://www.vermontcountrystore.com/p...l?evar3=browse

I'm not the hugest fan of this print, but this has a really cute shape:
http://www.vermontcountrystore.com/p...l?evar3=browse
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Old 10-22-2010, 12:51 AM
 
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lifeguard that dress has all the chances of being frumpy.

i would look frumpy in it. i dont have the height nor do i know how to accessorize.

i have seen some people actually make it all look good. with the right undershirt, a scarf and the right kinda accessories.

in fact one of our young profs wear such dresses. she is tall with long hair and she carries herself very well. she in general has great dress sense so no matter she is one of those people who makes any kinds of clothes look good.

ugh i hate such people i so lack that ability and am rather envious of anyone who can turn anything into a fashion statement. and that dress can absolutely be made so.

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Old 10-22-2010, 01:41 AM - Thread Starter
 
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OP here.

Wow - I was SOOO shocked at the sheer number of responses! I guess I'm not altogether surpised at the overwelming majority saying it's definitely frumpy (which may explain why it wasn't easy to find a pic to post in the first place).

Thank you so much for all the responses - I have lots of sites open now to explore! And a few new ideas. The faux wrap dresses may be workable - I'd have to try some on. I've always loved the long sweater over leggings look but felt it would make me look heavier so have stayed away from it - so maybe I'll go give it a try as well.

I think many people could see what I was getting at - I need something practical (for cold weather) that was physically comfortable but ideally not horrendous. I kind of knew the jumper was totally frumpy (perhaps that's why I never see anyone wearing it) but thought maybe I was wrong - I'm not so good with fashion. I want to be physically comfortable but also not feel self-conscious that I look bad/frumpy/fat/out of style.

A couple people asked why I don't wear pants. It's not a modesty or religious thing I just hate pants, always have. About a year ago I decided that I wasn't wearing them anymore when I realized I was avoiding leaving the house with ds 'cause I dreaded getting dressed. Because of how I carry my weight I have to go waaaay up in sizes to fit my (lack of) waist & they are constantly sliding down but if I cinch them around the waist they are uncomfortable & cut my fat belly in half - unattractive! I just do not ever feel comfortable in pants. Jeans & a t-shirt seem to easy but make me miserable to wear.

I'm also looking for inexpensive clothing 'cause I really hope to not get much use out of things in this size due to the weight loss that is going to start..... any day now.

Seriously, any more suggestions? Right now I have two long denim skirts, one sweater & some t-shirts - I'm bored & unhappy with my wardrobe.

Surviving sleep deprivation one day at a time with dd (Oct '11) & ds (Oct '08).

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Old 10-22-2010, 01:46 AM
 
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Aw wow...myself and all the moms I hang out with are 'skanky'.

The tunic sweater/leggings/boots are IMHO a pretty common classy mom look where I'm from...I'm still trying to figure out the skanky part of the equation. In fact, some may say it's the new soccer-mom look, and actually, few of the teens wear it around here (I guess they've moved on to other lamby-type things)

I so prefer leggings to jeans or pants. And my boots - no-heeled or short-heeled are uber-comfy, the leather conforms to my legs and keep me warm

I have skinny jeans (I'm underweight and I think it looks good with my tunics).

Sleeveless sweaters - also pretty trendy here, more of a fall look. I bought a few, wear them with longsleeved t-shirts underneath. They're actually pretty warm (keeps the core warm) and don't have the heavy, bulky mass of a sweater.

OP - sorry, frumpy. I saw the name of the store and shuddered...yeah, sister bride it is.
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Old 10-22-2010, 01:52 AM
 
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If I could find long enough sweater, I would consider it with leggings. Unlike you, most of my weight is in my hips and thighs (and chest- think well-rounded hourglass...) so it has to be a nice long sweater. Since you carry your weight higher, the leggings would probably work really well for you!

As for jeans- check the 'right fit' jeans, they made all the difference in the world for me. I don't have to size up or down, I just go by my shape and measurements.

This time of year I also like a long skirt (I love the broomstick skirt style) over leggings with a pair of boots. For me, leggings have been my concession to the reality that I am not good at being a well behaved lady, and my skirt may or may not fly in a direction it should not at any given moment.
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Old 10-22-2010, 02:07 AM
 
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I simply will not attempt to dress anyone else (this thread has made me cringe! ) and I cannot even begin to speak on behalf of women of the aforementioned shape since I am not one of them. I do, though, have to stand up and defend one article of clothing:

Leggings are AWESOME. So awesome that I wish I looked better in them. I live in jeans but I wish I could live in spandex. I can move in ANY DIRECTION completely comfortably - climb, bend, jump ... I LOVE it! I'm a former cheerleader and I wore shiny spandex of all shapes and sizes (... all ...) for many years and although I'm not as comfortable showing as much as skin as I was when I was in my early 20's, I will always be comfortable in flexy-fun spandex. I would wear leggings with boots, leggings with Chucks, leggings with flip flops, leggings barefoot ... and, no, they aren't flattering on everyone and that don't fit every situation but MAN are they comfortable!

That is all.

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Old 10-22-2010, 03:03 AM
 
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Originally Posted by Princess ConsuelaB View Post
Umm, it's pretty grandma-riffic
My thoughts too.
I am not a fashion guru and have a sorry clothes budget so I just wear what I like and what feels comfortable - mostly jeans and sweats/yoga pants. Wear what you feel is best for you.

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Old 10-22-2010, 03:15 AM
 
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A couple people asked why I don't wear pants. It's not a modesty or religious thing I just hate pants, always have. About a year ago I decided that I wasn't wearing them anymore when I realized I was avoiding leaving the house with ds 'cause I dreaded getting dressed. Because of how I carry my weight I have to go waaaay up in sizes to fit my (lack of) waist & they are constantly sliding down but if I cinch them around the waist they are uncomfortable & cut my fat belly in half - unattractive! I just do not ever feel comfortable in pants. Jeans & a t-shirt seem to easy but make me miserable to wear.
In this case I'll give my suggestions. Before I lost weight I had a large middle. As in, people assumed I was very pregnant. Pants did not stay up if I bought sizes that fit my belly and I had to cinch with belts, so not attractive. I learned that layers are super important! I always wore (and still do) wear camis under everything to help smooth things out. Yoga pants were my friend. Big wide top waist band that I could hike up and no one even knew. I could larger and they still looked good.

And my secret little favorite pair? Maternity... yes, I'm really really bad. In my defense they were maternity yoga pants that did NOT have the panel but were cut to accommodate a larger middle. No one could tell the difference and they actually stayed on! They looked stylish and like normal ones. Just thought I'd throw that out there in case you want to give comfy pants a try again.

Clothes with high waists, like empire dresses, felt better on. I had a mock wrap-type dress (grabbed it and took a picture, it doesn't fit but I couldn't bear to split with it yet, lol) that I wore a couple times but I decided that I wasn't that into dresses. It was cute though! I went through a phase where I bought a TON of skirts, but actually never wore any of the, lol. Sold them for $1 a piece at last year's garage sale!

I used accessories to draw attention up to my face instead of my belly as well. Lots of scarves and big gaudy necklaces (which I still love).

Most important is that whatever you decide to wear you need to love it. When you feel comfortable and confident in what you are wearing it will show and it wont matter what it is because your attitude will shine and that's what people are going to notice.

Mom to Joscelyne 14, Andrew 12, and Mackenzie 10 and wife to Nate.
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Old 10-22-2010, 05:14 AM
 
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I would suggest something like this. Anything that has the gathers on the side will look slimming.

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Old 10-22-2010, 05:17 AM
 
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I haven't waded through everything on the thread, but as for the poster who said wrap dresses were impractical, I wear mine with shorts under them because I wear a medical device that needs to go in a pocket. They work wonderfully with shorts.

Also, wrap dresses with a different-colored panel in the front take away some of the "just jumped out of bed into this piece of fabric" look. I have a fabulous one right now.

As for jumpers, I think that they hide the body rather than show it off. If that is what you want to do, go for it. If you want to show off your curves, I wouldn't go for a jumper.

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Old 10-22-2010, 06:30 AM
 
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I actually found it kinda funny that some were insinuating that this dress was "grown up" while the other styles posted were too "young" because the first thing I thought when I clicked the link was "just like the jumpers I used to wear... in Kindergarten". So yeah... A bit too 6-year-old Catholic school girl IMO.

I think the long sweater/leggings combo can look great on bigger girls. My only suggestion is to go for wide belts rather than skinny. Wide belts look better on pretty much anyone, IMO.

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Old 10-22-2010, 06:35 AM
 
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I'm a comfort over any fashion rule kind girl, so yes I like that dress and would wear it (I'd pick the navy one). I'd never wear it with a white shirt, though. That wouldn't be interesting enough for me. A bright hot pink stripey shirt is more like it. Maybe paired with stripey pink socks as well and a hot pink purse. I think it would go well with turquoise as well, with a metallic silver handbag.

Of course I'm not you and can't decide if it's good for you or not.

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Old 10-22-2010, 10:40 AM
 
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Originally Posted by lifeguard View Post
I'm also looking for inexpensive clothing 'cause I really hope to not get much use out of things in this size due to the weight loss that is going to start..... any day now.

Seriously, any more suggestions? Right now I have two long denim skirts, one sweater & some t-shirts - I'm bored & unhappy with my wardrobe.
Go with the long skirt idea - anything at or below the knee. After I had DS and gained a bunch of weight, long skirts were my friend. Especially ones that were meant to be worn at the hips. I'd buy them to fit my waist and I'd be able to wear them through quite a few sizes as I lost. I've always preferred skirts to pants - I find them much more comfortable and more flattering.

If you add a nice tshirt or (gasp!) short sleeve sweater and open cardigan sweater or button down they take you through all the seasons AND hide tummies nicely. Just make sure shirts are long enough to cover once the skirt sits at your hips.

I hunt through TJMaxx, Nordstrom Rack, etc. Another place I love is Soft Surroundings but they are fairly pricey unless you can find stuff on sale.
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Old 10-22-2010, 11:13 AM
 
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Those flowy cardis are all over the place (like this), in tons of great colors and patterns. (I used to call them ballet sweaters, but doesn't look like anyone calls them that anymore. I googled and it seems ballet sweaters have ties/bows. Huh. Learn something new every day.) Anyway, they are a great way to take a basics/neutral outfit of solid skirt and solid top and add color or texture or interest. Plus, you get the layering and added warmth.

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Old 10-22-2010, 11:14 AM
 
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Oh, also, Steinmart has a really good selection of cardis and decorative scarves. I'd never shopped there before but we moved here and there is one very close. I was pleasantly surprised to find a lot of great stuff (in both plus and straight sizes) at decent prices.

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Old 10-22-2010, 11:34 AM
 
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I'm a comfort over any fashion rule kind girl, so yes I like that dress and would wear it (I'd pick the navy one). I'd never wear it with a white shirt, though. That wouldn't be interesting enough for me. A bright hot pink stripey shirt is more like it. Maybe paired with stripey pink socks as well and a hot pink purse. I think it would go well with turquoise as well, with a metallic silver handbag.

Of course I'm not you and can't decide if it's good for you or not.
I would never have thought of putting a funky twist on that jumper - cool!

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Old 10-22-2010, 11:47 AM
 
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I'm sorry but we obviously have a difference of opinion on it and your links illustrate this perfectly.

I'll bow out now and leave it for the OP to decide if any of these looks are for her.
I know you said you were bowing out, but I am SO confused right now. What exactly doesn't look good??? I think these women look phenomenal.

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Old 10-22-2010, 12:44 PM
 
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I am LOVING these fashion threads, but alas, I have to be my mod self before I can play. No one is in trouble, but I need to stress --

----------

It is absolutely appropriate to for us to share how we think certain clothes make ourselves look. However, per the UA, it is not ok to state how others look in clothes, especially negatively.

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--------

Thanks much! (and now I can talk about New Englanders and short-sleeved sweaters. )

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Old 10-22-2010, 01:23 PM
 
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So... short-sleeved sweaters. I only own one, but it is actually really great for here in New England when the weather fluctuates so much. LAYERS of varying lengths and weights are required to get by. You could leave the house in the morning to run errands and freeze your butt off, yet two hours later be roasting in sun. And while running those errands, some stores have the heat cranked, but the next one you enter might not have it on at all.

Also, with my fibromyalgia, my body temperature can be all over the place. Too cold and I hurt. Too hot and I hurt. With the short sleeves, here in October (where today it tried to snow! we had those spitty snowflakes.) I can wear a long-sleeved cute t underneath (getting my core warmer without getting too stifly-hot) and a warm coat on top and just layer down or back up as I need to. I get great compliments, so it can't look that bad.

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Old 10-22-2010, 01:57 PM
 
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Those flowy cardis are all over the place (like this), in tons of great colors and patterns. (I used to call them ballet sweaters, but doesn't look like anyone calls them that anymore. I googled and it seems ballet sweaters have ties/bows. Huh. Learn something new every day.) Anyway, they are a great way to take a basics/neutral outfit of solid skirt and solid top and add color or texture or interest. Plus, you get the layering and added warmth.
My sister is a large lady and she LOVES those cardis - they have a very slimming effect.
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Old 10-22-2010, 02:02 PM
 
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I love short sleeved sweaters!

In the summer places have the a/c cranked so much that I freeze otherwise.

In the winter a lot of people keep their homes way too hot. So I will wear a short sleeved sweater with a cardigan or open shirt over it. Then if it is really warm somewhere I can take off the cardigan and be comfortable - I would be too chilly in a tshirt type top.
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Old 10-22-2010, 02:06 PM
 
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My sister is a large lady and she LOVES those cardis - they have a very slimming effect.
i agree! i wear my cascade sweater constantly. here's one way:
http://anyweargirl.com/wp-content/up...07-600x800.jpg

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