New Year Resolutions, anyone? - Mothering Forums

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#1 of 44 Old 12-27-2010, 01:04 AM - Thread Starter
 
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I've done these for three or four years now, and I really love it. It's the Aspie in me. :) I don't usually achieve all my goals, mind you, but I do actually keep them in mind from time to time throughout the year, and usually end up better off than if I hadn't made them. F'rinstance, this year one of my goals was to get my learner's and restricted driver's licence. I didn't quite make it because the testing place was booked up over Christmas, but I booked my restricted test for January 13. (Of course, whether or not I pass it is a different matter!) Having the December deadline really did help motivate me to get around to learning. So, yay.

 

Anyhoo, I'm thinking of next year's resolutions now! A complicating factor is that I'm pregnant and will be giving birth in June, so I don't want to set any housekeeping/crafty/time-consuming goals that will inevitably fall apart once I have a new baby. Also, I'm pretty significantly depressed at the moment, and I'm not sure if that should motivate me to choose really go-get-'em drag-me-out-of-a-rut goals, or nice modest achievable ones that won't set me up for failure and yet more spiralling depression. :p

 

So here's what I have at the moment... first draft only...

 

- Read a primary/important religious text from X number of different religions. I'll need to research this one. Islam, the Qu'ran, easy; Buddhism and Wicca? No idea. Hence the resolution, really. I realise not all religions are based on a text, but I'd like to read something generally considered essential and/or comprehensive by every group (but not, like, a 2000-page Encyclopaedia of Hinduism or something. Slightly more laypersony than that, if possible.) Any suggestions?

 

- Get into the habit of writing on a schedule. I have a few online writing avenues with regular commitments, and I need to make myself write a hair care article every Monday, a sewing article every Tuesday, and so on.

 

- Something along the lines of "Stop surfing the freaking internet already!!", but I need to think of a way that'll actually work (and allow me some mercy when I'm breastfeeding a newborn for 18 hours a day).

 

- Something about spending more quality time with DD (even/especially after the new baby comes). She's been rather neglected recently, because I've been so sick - she's learned to amuse herself pretty well, but it makes me feel incredibly guilty. And I tend to forget to do "normal parent stuff" with DD anyway. So maybe a goal like "Read a book a day with DD" or "Do three craft activities a week with DD" or something.

 

- Get a daily planner, write random acts of housework on different pages, and do them as they come up. I did this once years ago and it worked pretty well - for several months, at least! So every month I'd write "Change the sheets", or whatever (yes, I'm a terrible housekeeper, and wouldn't change the sheets nearly that often without a reminder, and yes, I've heard of Flylady, but it doesn't sound like me). I also put down stuff like "Fertilise the garden" or "Defrost the freezer" or "Rub leather preserver on the couch" - you know, stuff you're meant to do regularly, but (I) never get around to doing?

 

- Master the art of chicken won tons, and enough other Chinese yum cha-style dishes to make a complete meal. Bonus points if I can get DH, who hates Chinese food, to enjoy it. (Eating it without complaint would be satisfactory, though...)

 

- Knit/sew X items during the year. Or "complete X number of half-finished/planned craft projects"... or "use up X percent of fabric stash before you buy more"... or "work on sewing/knitting projects for X hours a week". Something like that. I'd make a grand resolution about doing handmade Christmas presents, but even now I know it's never gonna happen.

 

- Make an honest effort to go off sugar for a respectable period of time (at least. The idea, of course, being that I will be so full of newfound vigor and joy, with a Cate Blanchett complexion and curls sprouting thickly from my scalp as I bound up mountains, that I will toss away my chocolate mousse recipe with nary a backward glance. But if not, at least I need to stick with it until I can say I tried it.)

 

- Something about writing fiction. But I'll have to word this one pretty strongly, because I'm bad enough at writing non-fiction in a timely and regular fashion. My attempts at creative writing usually flop into a void of laziness six paragraphs in. I might have to threaten myself with thumbscrews or the rack.

 

That's all I've got so far. Care to critique/applaud reverently/share yours? :)


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#2 of 44 Old 12-27-2010, 05:47 AM
 
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wow Smokering that's QUITE a list. and i can relate to some of them dearly. esp your last one. AND i want to master the art of tibetian momos and the soup that comes along with it. to make it taste as close to the real stuff as possible. 

 

ask me again in spring. smile.gif

 

right now i am hibernating. it wont be new year for me till the new green leaves appear. that's when the resolutions within me demand attention. 

 

right now i just want to be and enjoy the silence chicken3.gif

 

but i did want to give you a hug2.gif i've been out hiking enough that this year that i am not that depressed. the gray this year instead of pulling me down is energizing me. and the fact that i am now staying away from the computer. nothing gets me down more the computer. at any time of the year. 

 

but oh .... i would sooo give anything to be able to have some simple steamed tibetian momos. that doesnt taste oily!!!!


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#3 of 44 Old 12-27-2010, 06:44 AM
 
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I just have a few things in mind for this year:

 

Continue to lose weight

Stopping using my credit card

Build a secure run and pop door for the chicken shed

Dig up more of the yard so there is less grass and more edible plantings

Take the kids more places in the summer

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#4 of 44 Old 12-27-2010, 08:12 AM
 
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Quit smoking (attempt number, oh heck I lose count)

 

Pay off the majority of my debt

 

Use my cameras MORE this year ~ Just did a slide show of my favs for my blog from 2010 and realized that it's been a quiet year compared to other years

 

Commit to a 5am Yoga practice 5 mornings per week

 

Peace x

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#5 of 44 Old 12-27-2010, 08:22 AM
 
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This upcoming year is going to be a big one. I have some things that I really hope will happen and some things which are more of a personal resolution.

Things I really hope will happen:
-partner gets visa granted
-I secure full-time work and a decent place to live
-smooth and peaceful homebirth in June and a happy and healthy baby
-smooth second start to kindergarten for my kid (starting mid-year after a pretty bad K experience in latin america)
-have a healthier year than 2010 (so far: 2 cases of strep, 1 miscarriage, 1 rough first trimester, 1 long lasting case of parasites...nothing horribly devastating but just lots of feeling sick and tired for months on end)
-get married (civil) and start planning the church wedding

Personal resolutions:

-start working out again as soon as my pregnancy nausea eases up completely and keep it up throughout the year
-get back into a good parenting groove with my kid. being sick/exhausted for so long threw things way off.
-expand my list of 'things i cook well'
-get my kid baptized and get the new baby baptized
-get involved in my Church

raising my two sunshine children.

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#6 of 44 Old 12-27-2010, 11:21 AM - Thread Starter
 
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but i did want to give you a hug2.gif i've been out hiking enough that this year that i am not that depressed. the gray this year instead of pulling me down is energizing me. and the fact that i am now staying away from the computer. nothing gets me down more the computer. at any time of the year.

Yeah, I was thinking of taking up hiking or some other activity. I walk a fair bit out of necessity (car licence not-having), but I haven't noticed it really helping. I used to like hiking as a kid... Trouble is, I'm not sure DD's old enough to hike for very long yet, and I'll probably develop pelvic girdle pain again - in a few weeks, actually, yay - which will probably last until the end of my pregnancy. After which... well yes, I could take the baby in a mei tai or something, theoretically. But I don't know if I'm cool enough for that. :p And DH doesn't really like hiking. I guess we could start small, though. I'd need to buy some boots...

 

What I really want to do is swing dancing, but that's problematic. Obviously I can't take it up while pregnant, and leaving the baby to go to weekly classes is... possible, I guess, but not likely. Plus I'm not sure DH likes the thought of me dancing with Other Men, and he definitely doesn't want to learn too - we took a term of ballroom dancing when we were engaged and it was not his favourite thing ever. :p

 

So yeah, I'll think about the exercise thing. DH wants to lose weight, so I might be able to persuade him into something. The computer, though, is definitely more within my power (if not willpower!) to control. Even DH says it depresses me, and he's a computer nut!


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#7 of 44 Old 12-27-2010, 11:29 AM
 
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1. Become serious about my faith.

2. lose the weight I have gained this year.

3. stop being such a pushover even if that means making life changes

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#8 of 44 Old 12-27-2010, 11:35 AM
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* save money for vacation

* work on my health

* read more books

 


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#9 of 44 Old 12-27-2010, 01:41 PM - Thread Starter
 
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*puts on Unsolicited Advice Hat*

 

One thing I've learned from.... a few... years of New Year's Resolutions is that they have to be concrete and specific or I just forget about them. There has to be a plan of action. So instead of "read more books", I'd go for something like "Go to the library once a month", "Read one book a week", "Read for 15 minutes every night before I go to sleep", "Read through all of somebody-or-other's 50 Books You Must Read Before You Die list" (not the 1001 books one, unless you're planning to have a LOT of spare time next year!), or whatever. You know? That way you can see pretty concretely if you've achieved your goal, instead of thinking mid-June "Have I read more books this year? I dunno, I went on that Jane Austen kick in March, but then I got busy".

 

Although actually, the best way I managed to read more books this year was by developing horrific first-trimester fatigue, so that even sitting at the computer was too tiring. I don't recommend it in general, but man, I got through a lot of books! (The difficulty was then trying to drag myself to the library to get more out...)


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#10 of 44 Old 12-27-2010, 02:18 PM
 
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I am not one to ever New Years resolutions because they always seem to center around something BIG that is hard to change. But I like the goal ideas some of you posted.

 

I'd like to learn how to use my digital camera. I know how to take the pictures but cant figure out how to view them correctly. I'd like to know how to upload them off camera, print them, post them online and save some to my keychain photo viewer. Both camera and keychain viewer were holiday gifts from 3 years ago LOL

 

Rhianna

 

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#11 of 44 Old 12-27-2010, 05:09 PM
 
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I'm not huge on new years resolutions so much as I pick a theme and tend to go with it. 2011 is going to be the year of simplification. I can feel it in my bones. winky.gif  I've actually started the journey already and it will continue on well into the next year. The big goals for this are:

*dejunk the house/get rid of needless clutter and crap (I'm mostly done with this, but have boxes of stuff I need to go through and decide if it needs to be kept or not.

*dejunk my soul. I've begun therapy that's been badly needed for a very long time.

*find a new job. I have a job now that I'm not so crazy about, but it is better than the one I've had for the past 2 years. It's just that this job I have now is not really fitting in with how I feel about life in general. The boss is pretty abusive and just puts out this crazy vibe, and it's for a company that has very "big business" motives and values. That's not who I am or the direction I want to go in. So the goal is to find a job that is more intune with who I am.

So I am thinking the theme for 2011 is "cleaning house" (inside and out)


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#12 of 44 Old 12-27-2010, 05:27 PM
 
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I want to revisit all my non-fiction. I want to read my gardening books, and my cookbooks and I plan on doing that for much of the winter! Which means that someone is going to be grumpy when I leave books all over the house but oh well.

 

 


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#13 of 44 Old 12-27-2010, 05:43 PM
 
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I have done this in the past but failed miserably.  I like what Smokering said about making the goals concrete and specific.  Makes reaching the goals a bit easier and not so intimidating.            h  Here are some of the ones I have been thinking about

 

1: Visit more things here in St Louis with the kids.  One per month.  The twins are old enough that getting out of the house is getting much easier and way more fun!!  I have the right tools now so that helps!

 

2: Visit with a friend who can mentor me as a homeschooling mom and help me to restart our year and figure some things out.

 

3: Do more activities with the kids.  One per day, be it art, sensory, large motor, etc, something that I can connect with them more.

 

4: Take one room per month and clean/declutter.

 

5: Get outside more and play with the neighborhood kids or with other friends!!

 

6: Get certified as a car seat tech. 


 

 

 

 


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#14 of 44 Old 12-27-2010, 07:47 PM - Thread Starter
 
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That's the spirit! :p Now you need to get a daily planner or a calendar (or Google calendar) so you can write down reminders and tick things off. DH is going into town to buy trousers tomorrow, so I've given him very specific instructions for buying me a daily planner with lots of space per day, but the whole week visible on a two-page spread. I know there are great Internet organisation programs out there, but I don't like them - I like being able to write lists out by hand, and jot down appointments when I'm out, and stuff.

 

Ooh ! I could be really good this year and keep a "Christmas/Birthday Present Ideas List" in the back of my planner! Then I might actually be able to shop ahead of time, like sensible adults do. :p


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#15 of 44 Old 12-27-2010, 10:25 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Smokering View Post

*puts on Unsolicited Advice Hat*

 

One thing I've learned from.... a few... years of New Year's Resolutions is that they have to be concrete and specific or I just forget about them. There has to be a plan of action. So instead of "read more books", I'd go for something like "Go to the library once a month", "Read one book a week", "Read for 15 minutes every night before I go to sleep", "Read through all of somebody-or-other's 50 Books You Must Read Before You Die list" (not the 1001 books one, unless you're planning to have a LOT of spare time next year!), or whatever. You know? That way you can see pretty concretely if you've achieved your goal, instead of thinking mid-June "Have I read more books this year? I dunno, I went on that Jane Austen kick in March, but then I got busy".

 

Although actually, the best way I managed to read more books this year was by developing horrific first-trimester fatigue, so that even sitting at the computer was too tiring. I don't recommend it in general, but man, I got through a lot of books! (The difficulty was then trying to drag myself to the library to get more out...)



Well, I got six new books for Christmas, so reading those will be a good start! 


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#16 of 44 Old 12-28-2010, 01:24 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Ooh, I just thought of something else. I have terrible posture. Atrocious. I'm permanently slouched over; in photos where I'm meant to be standing up straight, I always look vaguely hunched like a suspicious dowager. (I blame a classmate who, when I was ten, told me I must be "proud" because I didn't bend over my work to write, and caused me in a fit of guilt and Asperger's syndrome to start writing with my nose to the paper. Strange childhood.)

 

So, yeah, been meaning to fix that. Apparently slouching is bad for getting babies into a good position for labour, and I find it hard to carry things and get tired if I stand for too long. (I might possibly also have mild scoliosis; not sure.) Anyway, anyone know any good exercises for improving posture? Someone suggested spinningbabies.com, but I haven't checked it out yet. I should warn you I'm very unlikely to take up anything comprehensive like yoga or Pilates. I just... zero desire, you know? So, um, yeah.


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#17 of 44 Old 12-28-2010, 01:32 AM
 
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I don't usually make any resolutions because I don't end up keeping them, but I was thinking that I would really like to get more stuff done in 2011. I'm a big planner, but fail to see things through. I enjoy organizing things and making lists, but once a system is in place for something, say housekeeping, I have a hard time actually doing it because the "fun" part is over. I am hoping to recommitting myself to taking better care of our home and making time to for crafting because I really haven't done anything crafty in a very long time.


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#18 of 44 Old 12-28-2010, 10:10 AM
 
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Okay, I need to start small or I'll fail and feel miserable, so here are my goals:

 

Do 15 minutes of yoga and sit-ups at least 5 times per week (my back has been hurting and I think it's because I have no core strength)

 

Do some sort of purposeful exercise outside (or on the treadmill) for 30 minutes 3 times per week

 

Limit my computer time to an hour in the morning and an hour in the evening

 

 

OP, I so hear you on the posture. From childhood through college, I got compliments from random strangers all the time on my posture. I always thought it was such a weird thing to compliment someone about, but when I look back at pictures and videos, I did have noticeably nice posture! Now I slump (again, the terrible lack of core strength) and it's something that really bothers me. I'm 5'10", but with the extra weight and the slumping I look short and dumpy. Yuck! 


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#19 of 44 Old 12-28-2010, 10:49 AM
 
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Working on posture is a great idea!  I used to have perfect posture (marching band and baton-twirling), but since having kids I realize I don't walk around with my abs tight and shoulders back 100% of the time anymore.  It makes such a huge difference in how your clothes fit!

 

My main goal is just to track the calories I eat every day.  I'm not putting a limit on them, I think just tracking will make a difference and make me think about what I'm eating, deciding if I really want something.  You know?  I have an app on my phone (Calorie Counter) that makes it really easy.  I also think that the goal of tracking calories is something that is absolutely attainable, while loosing a set amount of weight is more difficult. 

 

I'm starting the Couch to 5K program again this week, and I'm determined to finish it this time!  I'm going to sign up for a 5K in March, so I'll have to stick with the nine week program to be prepared.  I might sign up for a 10K a couple months after that, I'll see how I feel after the 5K.

 

I'm not ready to commit to the full Fly Lady system again (did it religiously before kids), but I'm going to try to do one 27 item fling each day, rotating through my house.


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#20 of 44 Old 12-28-2010, 01:25 PM - Thread Starter
 
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It makes such a huge difference in how your clothes fit!

That's how I noticed it! I've been trying to learn pattern-drafting, which is a really good way to learn all your figure faults. It was kind of depressing, actually. :p Not only do I slouch, but one shoulder is slightly higher than the other, both shoulders are abnormally wide, I have a long torso and short legs, and so on, and so on... When you actually have to add darts and adjust different sides of an outfit to accommodate your skew-wiffness, it makes you go "huh, I'm a mutant who should have been kindly drowned at birth". And yeah... I don't want to learn to make beautiful clothes in which I still look hunched over and sloppy.

 


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#21 of 44 Old 12-28-2010, 02:41 PM
 
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Smokering, have you thought about Oriental dancing ? I kept going to classes until past 7 months pregnant and actually used some of the moves I learned in class (pelvic rotations) during birth # 2 and # 3

+ it would help you to ease out of your slouching or un-even shoulder level since we learn to move bits of the body in isolation  ... 80% of the students in my classes are NOT oriental in origin so for most of us, it shows that we are stiff and come from a culture where we never learned to move with that type of ease, BUT it is great fun to learn and it feels liberating really !... + your DH couldn't object really, there's no partners and it's all women ...

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#22 of 44 Old 12-28-2010, 03:07 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Oriental dancing... is that like bellydancing? I do have a friend who teaches that, but she's big on the performance/costume angle of it, which I'm not so into. (Well, I think the costumes are gorgeous, but I can't afford them right now!)


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#23 of 44 Old 12-29-2010, 12:20 PM
 
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yes, as in belly dancing ... is it compulsory to take part in the performance ? with the teacher I'm with, it's optional; last year I was 20 years older and 20 kilos more than everyone else, rather self-concious ... but this year, there's someone who's nearly 20 years older than me, so it's really for everybody, any shape

 

+ for just the class we don't have to have a particular costume, just some sort of scarf around our hips, if possible with fake coins sewn in so that "it's the right noise" if we wiggle all right !!!

 

one of the classes I go to, the room is rather cold so I have a long sleeve black t-shirt and a full gym trousers as well as two pairs of socks ... as long as the scarf is in a contrasting color, I'm fine (+ the teacher wants to see the legs to check we are doing the moves all right, only more advanced students wear skirts ....)

 

I just take it as a pleasant way to get fit, even my physiotherapist gave me the "go ahead" except for one move during the warm up (I have a problem in one foot)

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#24 of 44 Old 12-29-2010, 06:07 PM
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Smokering, if you have a chair that doesn't have arms on it, you can straddle the chair (like you're riding a horse) and that will really help your posture.

 

 

 

And since we're talking about what we want for the New Year, I'd like to throw this wish out to the Universe...........may my MIL actually move out of state, like she says she is going to. 

 


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#25 of 44 Old 12-29-2010, 07:07 PM
 
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Originally Posted by Smokering View Post

 

 

 

- Read a primary/important religious text from X number of different religions. I'll need to research this one. Islam, the Qu'ran, easy; Buddhism and Wicca? No idea. Hence the resolution, really. I realise not all religions are based on a text, but I'd like to read something generally considered essential and/or comprehensive by every group (but not, like, a 2000-page Encyclopaedia of Hinduism or something. Slightly more laypersony than that, if possible.) Any suggestions?

 

 

 For Buddhism I recommend the Dhammapada


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#26 of 44 Old 12-29-2010, 07:27 PM
 
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I have a few but my main one is to declutter and to make my new house more comfortable.

 

*Declutter my things...currently working on the 100 things project

*Remodel my bathroom

*start planning the remodel of my kitchen

*put in new carpeting

*continue my studies for my nursing degree


"Simplicity is the ultimate sophistication" --Leonardo Da Vinci
 blogging.jpg  780/2014 decluttered

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#27 of 44 Old 12-30-2010, 12:58 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Quote:
Smokering, if you have a chair that doesn't have arms on it, you can straddle the chair (like you're riding a horse) and that will really help your posture.

That doesn't sound too onerous. :) Thanks!

Quote:
  For Buddhism I recommend the Dhammapada

Cool, thanks! I should ask about this in Spirituality as well.

 

So yesterday I bought myself a daily planner (had to look in four shops to find the right format, but the one I got even has a page for writing goals on!). I decided my writing goal will be to get into a good routine with my web writing and fiction. So I've written in a schedule. FW article on Mondays, UTH article on Tuesdays, fiction on Wednesdays, random Suite article on alternate Fridays. I might put in blogging as well, as I've been really lazy about that recently (largely because every entry would be "Still feel ghastly, hate being pregnant"). I should probably put a minimum time limit on my fiction writing (or page/word count goal), or I know I'll get lazy.

 

For the Internet, I'm thinking of only allowing myself 20 minutes a day, plus maybe one longer block a week (if I want to hunt for presents on Etsy or look up sewing patterns or something similarly time-consuming).

 

Haven't quite hashed out all my other goals yet. I'm planning to put some more scheduley stuff in my planner - toy library every two weeks, library every three weeks (whenever I cut down on the internet I seem to read a LOT more!), etc. I even made a note two weeks before my family members' birthdays, so I'll have time to actually order presents online instead of hunting through town frantically the day before. Go me. :p I might even get cunning and remind myself to plant certain veggies at certain times.

 

The annoying this is that all the planning turns to custard around June. The baby's due June 9 and I have no idea how sleep-deprived, sick or otherwise incapacitated I might be for the next several months. So I'm leaving a lot of blank space around that time.


If decomposition persists please see your necromancer.

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#28 of 44 Old 12-30-2010, 03:50 PM
 
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to keep going with my weight loss (nice to not start this fresh, i've been working at it for a while).

to start wearing an apron when i cook. i am fed up with stains and throwing shirts away!

to have a pair of 'cleaning clothes' for the same reason as above.

to roll with the punches more and 'pick my battles'.


Jessicaintactlact.gif, wife to Derricklurk.gif, missing Joslyn angel3.gif, 22 weeks 06.18.08, rainbow1284.gifBaby Kai Ambrose 05.10.10 and Isla Blythe born on Thanksgiving '12 uc.jpg

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#29 of 44 Old 12-30-2010, 10:23 PM
 
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oh, i love lists... i will have to get back to this one tomorrow.


“War is peace.
Freedom is slavery.
Ignorance is strength.”
― George Orwell, 1984
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#30 of 44 Old 12-30-2010, 10:27 PM
 
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Just two for me:

 

Continue losing weight - I'm 25lbs down now, over 100lbs to go

get my house clean and keep it that way


Me, 29, Muslim hijab.gif single mama to T age 7 energy.gif We homeschool.gif saynovax.giffambedsingle1.gif and Love it!
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