Swearing in public - Mothering Forums
Forum Jump: 
Reply
 
Thread Tools
#1 of 44 Old 03-17-2011, 01:05 PM - Thread Starter
Banned
 
Join Date: May 2009
Location: On a pilgrimage to Canterbury
Posts: 2,713
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)

I was out to lunch with my kids today in a place that had tables really close together. Since it was lunch hour, there were a lot of people there and everyone was trying to talk loudly to be heard by their party. I realized after a few minutes that the men sitting next to us (seemed like business men on their lunch break) were using the f word gratuitously and rather loudly.

 

Now I don't have problems with swearing, and I myself use the f word a bit, but c'mon. My kids were sitting right there, and my son, who is 4, was enthralled with their conversation and I could not draw his attention away from them. We were sort of stuck until they either left or we finished our lunch, and as the place was busy, there was no other table to move to.

 

I really don't like bothering other people about stuff like that, as I said, the words themselves don't bother me, but I felt like they were being inconsiderate about my kids. Who knows, maybe they don't have kids, so it didn't occur to them, but I always make an effort not to swear excessively in public because I know that it bothers some people. I didn't say anything because I ruled it a private conversation and figured they would be leaving soon anyhow (turns out they sat there the entire time we were there).

 

Would you have said something? Do you filter yourself in public situations?

InMediasRes is offline  
#2 of 44 Old 03-17-2011, 01:52 PM
 
doubledutch's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2007
Posts: 4,600
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)

if it was really bothering me, i would have said something.  for the f word?  personally, i wouldn't - but if they were discussing an accident in gory detail (or a movie or video game), or if they kept saying "tits" or using racial slurs, then yeah.  i would just say, "excuse me, my child is fascinated with what you're saying, but i'd rather he didn't absorb all of that.  would you mind toning it down?"  and if they really mind, i will ask for another table.

 

ds was at the park once with his dad, and some kids were enjoying the thrill of swearing.  they were 10-12 years old.  he said, "hey guys, he [toddler] really looks up to older kids and wants to imitate everything you do and say."  they quit swearing.

doubledutch is offline  
#3 of 44 Old 03-17-2011, 01:57 PM
 
CrazyCatLady's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2004
Location: Phoenix, AZ
Posts: 4,799
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)

I probably would have been annoyed, but I would not have said anything.  People have the right (for the most part) to say what they want and how they want in public.  Cuss words aren't a big deal to me really but I get annoyed and antsy when I hear people in public talking about spanking or cio techniques, but I don't speak up in a situations like that either.

 

I do filter my speech in public because it seems like the polite thing to do.  I don't mind doing it, and I'm kind of quiet/shy in public anyways so it's easy. 

 

Not saying that you feel this way op.  But I just don't like the potentially slippery slope of people should or shouldn't do certain things in public because kids are around.  I've seen it abused to the point where some think bikini's shouldn't be worn where kids are, or rock music should never be played where a kid can hear it, swear words should never be used, people should never kiss each other or hold hands, etc.  I think as long as laws are being followed and some common sense and courtesy is being used by most, that we can live life in front of kids normally with out it scarring them any.


Melaya (29) - Mom to Z (9) and soon to be I (due Nov 2013) stork-boy.gif

Birth mom to M (7), O (5), & C (2). winner.jpgnovaxnoIRC.giftriadadopt.jpg

CrazyCatLady is offline  
#4 of 44 Old 03-17-2011, 01:59 PM
 
EFmom's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2002
Posts: 8,103
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)

Nobody made me the language police.  I might have left or moved to a different table, but I'm not telling other adults how to speak in public.

EFmom is offline  
#5 of 44 Old 03-17-2011, 02:04 PM
 
katiesk's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2007
Location: Alaska
Posts: 2,203
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)

that situation would not have bothered me personally. i don't mind dd hearing that type of language though, in most settings. and while i don't use a ton of 'bad' language, dp does and does not censor himself around dd. what would really bother me is if people were speaking disrespectfully about others or using their 'bad' language to be rude. but i would be offended by that in general, not specifically because of dd hearing it. she knows. she may cuss out her zipper if it's giving her a hard time, but she also is very quick to call people on saying 'shut up' or 'stupid'. i have never told her not to say those words, but that they are not very friendly and pretty rude, and she has taken that very seriously. what i'm saying is that i don't have a problem with the words themselves either - just how they are used. i think kids are apt to learn that discretion as well, possibly

b

 

by observing others having a moment of rudeness.

 

 

 



Katie
katiesk is offline  
#6 of 44 Old 03-17-2011, 02:06 PM
 
katiesk's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2007
Location: Alaska
Posts: 2,203
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)

i'm sorry for the broken up post...i rarely reply because it is always such a hassle...case in point...

 

if it had bothered me enough to say something to them, i would have done it on principle, not because of my child. if i did not want to my child to observe something, i would move my child.

 

having said that, i would most certainly watch my own language and behavior in public, and especially when there are kids around.


Katie
katiesk is offline  
#7 of 44 Old 03-17-2011, 02:31 PM - Thread Starter
Banned
 
Join Date: May 2009
Location: On a pilgrimage to Canterbury
Posts: 2,713
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)


Quote:
Originally Posted by CrazyCatLady View Post

 

Not saying that you feel this way op.  But I just don't like the potentially slippery slope of people should or shouldn't do certain things in public because kids are around.  I've seen it abused to the point where some think bikini's shouldn't be worn where kids are, or rock music should never be played where a kid can hear it, swear words should never be used, people should never kiss each other or hold hands, etc.  I think as long as laws are being followed and some common sense and courtesy is being used by most, that we can live life in front of kids normally with out it scarring them any.


This is why I decided not to say anything, but I was curious about other people's feelings on this simply because I was feeling uncomfortable about it. I think I might have been a little more outspoken if they had been talking about something sexually explicit, racist, homophobic, etc., and definitely if they had been speaking disrespectfully to me. As it was, they were just talking about business stuff with some f words in there.

 

My daughter is too young to care and my son is old enough that I felt like, if he asked about the words they used, or used them himself, I could have explained to him what those words mean and that they might make people uncomfortable. But yeah, I'm not into censorship either. But at the same time, I do censor myself out of respect for others. I'm just curious what makes someone feel like it doesn't matter what they say in front of kids? Is it just a "not my kids, not my problem" thing?

 

 

 

InMediasRes is offline  
#8 of 44 Old 03-17-2011, 02:36 PM
 
CrazyCatLady's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2004
Location: Phoenix, AZ
Posts: 4,799
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)


 

Quote:
Originally Posted by InMediasRes View Post

 

My daughter is too young to care and my son is old enough that I felt like, if he asked about the words they used, or used them himself, I could have explained to him what those words mean and that they might make people uncomfortable. But yeah, I'm not into censorship either. But at the same time, I do censor myself out of respect for others. I'm just curious what makes someone feel like it doesn't matter what they say in front of kids? Is it just a "not my kids, not my problem" thing?

 

 

 


I assume some of it is clueless, childless people.  Or people that haven't had to worry about kids in so long that it's not on their radar anymore.  And then everyone has a different opinion on what they consider "acceptable" or not in front of kids.  I know some people who are fine with their kids using the "F" word as toddlers and some people who freak out over their 10 year old saying "penis".  Hard to know what is ok and what's not in public when everyone has a different view point on the matter.

 


Melaya (29) - Mom to Z (9) and soon to be I (due Nov 2013) stork-boy.gif

Birth mom to M (7), O (5), & C (2). winner.jpgnovaxnoIRC.giftriadadopt.jpg

CrazyCatLady is offline  
#9 of 44 Old 03-17-2011, 04:03 PM
 
Mummoth's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2003
Location: BC, Canada
Posts: 3,466
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 1 Post(s)

In that situation I say (a little too loudly) to my son/daughter that just because you hear an adult say a word, doesn't mean it's okay for you to say. Sometimes people take the hint and adjust their language, we've gotten the occasional apology, other times they either don't hear or they ignore it :) Any response is fine with me, as I've just addressed the issue with my children. My kids have also reached the age where there's a swear word here and there in movies I let them watch. They know that if they're caught using those words, I will decide they aren't old enough to watch big kid movies... it's pretty good incentive for them to mind their language.


~Teresa, raising DS (Jan. 02) and DD1 (Jun. 04) and DD2 (Dec. 11) with DH.

Mummoth is offline  
#10 of 44 Old 03-17-2011, 05:34 PM
 
KristyDi's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2007
Location: The 'burbs of Atlanta
Posts: 2,731
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)

I think it's polite to censor yourself a bit in public, not not mandatory  If you choose not to especially in such close proximity to young children, then, IMO, you need to be prepared to hear me say something like, "we don't say those words in our family." or something similar to my toddler that makes it pretty clear that your speech is not OK with me.  I won't be saying it passive aggressively to you, I'll just be communicating what we deem to be acceptable language in our family to my DD.


Kristy, wife to Josh proud mama to Katie: since 3/08 and Emma since 8/12.

KristyDi is offline  
#11 of 44 Old 03-17-2011, 08:35 PM
 
Hykue's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2010
Location: Saskatchewan, Canada
Posts: 592
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)

I try to censor myself in public, but I'm not always aware that there's a child there, and I have done just that in a restaurant before . . . until I went to the bathroom and saw the child sitting in the booth behind me.  I'm not very good at censoring myself.  To be honest, in that particular case, I wish the parent had mentioned it to the waiter and asked them to tell me there was a kid behind me - or, you know, my coworker could have done that.  But it's not like I think I did a terrible, horrible thing to that kid, I just try not to do it if I can help it - if I notice and remember to censor.  I don't think I would ask anyone to censor their speech for my kid, though (hard to say for sure since I don't have one yet), I think I would just deal with it if it came out in my kid's speech.


On a farm with our kiddo (nearly 2), two dogs, two cats, ten goats, two donkeys, nine sheep, a bunch of chickens, and a husband (in the winters). We have another on the way!
Hykue is offline  
#12 of 44 Old 03-17-2011, 09:47 PM
 
Drummer's Wife's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2005
Location: Land of Enchantment
Posts: 11,823
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)

I wouldn't have said anything, but then the F word is nothing new to my kids; heck, they might not even notice. 

 

Now, that all said, I think it's a bit socially inept to swear in public loudly enough for others outside of your own crowd to hear.  I may have a potty mouth in private, but I wouldn't dream of, say, cussing at the playplace at mcdonalds. 


ribboncesarean.gif cesareans happen.
Drummer's Wife is offline  
#13 of 44 Old 03-17-2011, 11:44 PM
 
Viola's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2002
Location: Nevada
Posts: 23,368
Mentioned: 2 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 2 Post(s)

If it bothered me, I would have told my kids to start saying it loudly right then.  Or maybe I'd just start saying it loudly too.  Then we could all have fun together, saying the F word loudly in public.  orngbiggrin.gif  But if my saying it caused him to censor himself, I'd probably censor myself too.

Viola is online now  
#14 of 44 Old 03-18-2011, 04:40 AM
Banned
 
Join Date: May 2006
Location: Lost in a good book (in San Diego)
Posts: 4,819
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Well it would bother me. If people are going to judge my kid and me if she starts saying the f word (and they would around here) then they need to not say it in front of my little parrot. People are free to talk as they like but I'm free to ask them to be considerate and around here it's just not acceptable manners to swear like that, in public/general company. There's a time and a place. It's like how I tell my students they can write and speak one way with their friends but another style is typical with essays or speeches.
St. Margaret is offline  
#15 of 44 Old 03-18-2011, 08:05 AM
 
Tumble Bumbles's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2009
Posts: 727
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)

I agree with this. I don't care what people do in the privacy of their own lives, but in public, some basic social manners are polite. The same way it would be *legal* for me to light up a huge honkin' smelly cigarette next to a baby on a park bench ... it would be incredibly rude, imo and I wouldn't do it. I don't smoke, just sayin'...  Sure, the person with the baby could move, but you'd think someone would have more social manners than to light up two feet away from a baby, even if it's their "right". Same with cursing.

 

I've told teens at our pool to knock off the swearing around my kid without hesitation. I try to be nice about it "I realize you guys are older and are expressing yourself but my kid is only 5 and I don't want her saying those words... do you think you could tone it down a bit please?" They always do, respectfully. I'm all about people's "rights" but I've got rights as well, including being able to enjoy swimming with my kid without having to listen to [what most of society] agrees is foul language.

 

 

Quote:
Originally Posted by St. Margaret View Post

Well it would bother me. If people are going to judge my kid and me if she starts saying the f word (and they would around here) then they need to not say it in front of my little parrot. People are free to talk as they like but I'm free to ask them to be considerate and around here it's just not acceptable manners to swear like that, in public/general company. There's a time and a place. It's like how I tell my students they can write and speak one way with their friends but another style is typical with essays or speeches.


 


Christ-centered loving wife & mama to 2 miracles! One & one . We live simply and mindfully. Expecting another blessing Feb 2015
Tumble Bumbles is offline  
#16 of 44 Old 03-18-2011, 08:11 AM
 
philomom's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2004
Location: Pacific Northwest
Posts: 9,430
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 2 Post(s)
Public swearing is not cool. Especially, if there's kids present. Also, it could be illegal in your city. If it is, you can threaten to call the police.

http://wiki.answers.com/Q/Is_it_illegal_to_swear_in_public
philomom is online now  
#17 of 44 Old 03-18-2011, 08:24 AM
 
~Charlie's~Angel~'s Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2008
Posts: 4,520
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)

I probably would have said something to the effect of "Excuse me sir, but do you kiss your mother with that mouth?  Because i dont want my kids talking like that after we leave here today, thanks!"

 

And i talk like a TRUCKER.  Just not around my kids.  Or anyone elses. 

~Charlie's~Angel~ is offline  
#18 of 44 Old 03-18-2011, 08:43 AM
 
choli's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2002
Posts: 4,433
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)



 

Quote:
Originally Posted by InMediasRes View Post

 

I'm just curious what makes someone feel like it doesn't matter what they say in front of kids? Is it just a "not my kids, not my problem" thing?


I don't feel that other people should somehow know what I find offensive in front of my kids and censor themselves. If I am uncomfortable with what my child is hearing, I remove her from the situation, I don't expect the world to moderate itself for my child.
 

 

choli is offline  
#19 of 44 Old 03-18-2011, 10:48 AM
 
Adaline'sMama's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2010
Posts: 4,792
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)

It wouldnt have bothered me. But if it had, I probably would have loudly told the kids "that word is inappropriate to use in public."

 

 

Calling the cops? Seriously? I dont belive the government should be able to censor WORDS that people use in a conversation. What's next, it being illegal to wear booty shorts, midriffs, say "oh my god" (to some , that is cursing) or say something that the government doesnt like?.  I understand if people are screaming curses at people, but in conversation? If my mother called the cops on someone for using foul language, it'd be the last time I went out in public with her.

 

Ever since I saw The Fantastic Mr. Fox, I am always saying "what the cuss" or "how the cuss did that happen". I love that movie.

andreac likes this.

Holly and David partners.gif

Adaline love.gif (3/20/10), and Charlie brokenheart.gif (1/26/12- 4/10/12) and our identical  rainbow1284.gif  twins Callie and Wendy (01/04/13)

SIDS happens. 

Adaline'sMama is offline  
#20 of 44 Old 03-18-2011, 11:29 AM
 
PhoenixMommaToTwo's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2006
Location: Formerly of AZ, now in Nebraska
Posts: 320
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)

I am seriously suprised by these replies! We cuss, around our kids, in public. Well, everywhere. It's just the way it is. It's not your place to censor an adult having an adult conversation. If you don't like listening to it, move. Or explain to your children why those words are not okay for them to use or for your family. It is certainly not the government's place to censor what we say! Hence, freedom of speech. That is seriously unconstitutional and wrong and frankly, it hinges on governmental control. Ridiculous!


"We submit to the majority because we have to. But we are not compelled to call our attitude of subjection a posture of respect."
Ambrose Bierce 
PhoenixMommaToTwo is offline  
#21 of 44 Old 03-18-2011, 11:43 AM
 
Tumble Bumbles's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2009
Posts: 727
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)

It's not anyone's "place" to censor anyone's conversation but it IS someone's "right" to be spewing their profanity so loudly my kids can hear them? Funny how that works. To be fair,  I rarely hear people's conversations when out and about (above a general chatter sound), so if I can hear someone cursing a blue streak, it's because they are being abnormally loud and disruptive. I shouldn't have to move because someone feels the need to "express themselves" loudly using language that's offensive to me and my family.  We don't have "freedom of speech" (that's where people are a bit misguided lol.gif ). There are so many places and situations you are not legally allowed to use certain language freely. Even restaurant owners and whoever are entitled to refuse service if someone is being disruptive or disrupting the peace or business (different than discrimination based on color or whatever, which is not allowed). I wouldn't call the cops on someone cursing or anything but if they're loud enough for me to hear every word, they're then infringing on MY right to have a peaceful lunch (or whatever). Why is it the people who are cursing the only ones with "rights"?

 

 


Christ-centered loving wife & mama to 2 miracles! One & one . We live simply and mindfully. Expecting another blessing Feb 2015
Tumble Bumbles is offline  
#22 of 44 Old 03-18-2011, 12:01 PM - Thread Starter
Banned
 
Join Date: May 2009
Location: On a pilgrimage to Canterbury
Posts: 2,713
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)

To those who have said that, if they were loud enough for me to hear, they were being too loud or disruptive, I have to clarify. The tables where we were were jammed so close together and the place was so loud (yeah, not going there during lunch rush ever again) that we might as well have been sharing a table. I didn't feel like they were being obnoxious or disruptive, my son just happened to be riveted by their conversation, despite my attempts to distract him back to our table. I'm not surprised-they were talking in an animated way.

 

The more I examine it (as I have said, the words themselves didn't bother me), the more I feel like I would be bothered by my kid repeating those words in the company of someone who would judge my parenting ability based on my kid swearing. We live in Utah, so my kid saying the F word would immediately elicit that kind of judgment from someone. I can't decide if that is silly for me to be so worried about the opinions of others. But then I think, I don't really swear in front of my kids. They've heard me say "hell" "dammit" and "sh*t" more than a few times, but they seem to understand the context and they have never repeated the words themselves, amazingly enough.

 

The more of the responses I read, the more I feel like I certainly had the right to politely ask them to clean it up. They, of course, would have had the right to politely decline. I certainly wouldn't have called the cops on them. When I told DH about this, he was somewhat appalled that I didn't ask them to stop, and he pointed out that just communicating that someone is making me uncomfortable is not infringing on their rights.

 

 

InMediasRes is offline  
#23 of 44 Old 03-18-2011, 03:34 PM
Banned
 
Join Date: May 2006
Location: Lost in a good book (in San Diego)
Posts: 4,819
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
This has got to be cultural--like how certain wedding traditions are considered "tacky" by many but are fine in certain regions or circles. But around here it is definitely not normal to swear in public and definitely around children. I think it's sad if its becoming standard for the world. It's jus about consideration. Of course people have freedom of speech but that doesn't mean it's polite. I would never call the cops about foul language but can't we have a little politeness? To me it shows respect for all around you. Everyone feels differently about language fine but thats why it's thoughtful to save it for private. And I'm an English teacher and very liberal, anticensorship, but this is not about censorship but politeness and just making that social choice.
Ms. Sisko and limabean like this.
St. Margaret is offline  
#24 of 44 Old 03-18-2011, 06:43 PM
 
CatsCradle's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2007
Location: New York City
Posts: 2,006
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)


Quote:
Originally Posted by St. Margaret View Post

This has got to be cultural--like how certain wedding traditions are considered "tacky" by many but are fine in certain regions or circles. But around here it is definitely not normal to swear in public and definitely around children. I think it's sad if its becoming standard for the world. It's jus about consideration. Of course people have freedom of speech but that doesn't mean it's polite. I would never call the cops about foul language but can't we have a little politeness? To me it shows respect for all around you. Everyone feels differently about language fine but thats why it's thoughtful to save it for private. And I'm an English teacher and very liberal, anticensorship, but this is not about censorship but politeness and just making that social choice.

I agree with much of this.  I would think that I'm one of the biggest advocates of free speech, but I also think that the right to free speech comes with responsibility.  If people want to cuss, that's their choice, but it annoys me when I'm in a an enclosed place (like a subway or train car or a bus) where it is impractical to move.  I just have problems with cussing in that I find (at least for myself) that it is often default language.  If I need to say the "f" word in three consecutive sentences, then I need to reevaluate my communication skills.  I don't want my DD to default to these types of words because I just think that I it exhibits a certain exterior to the public that I would rather she not do.  Yes, I'm such a jerk and tight-a--ed Victorian!  mischievous.gif
 

 

Ms. Sisko likes this.

"Lawyers, I suppose, were children once." Charles Lamb.
CatsCradle is offline  
#25 of 44 Old 03-18-2011, 07:35 PM
 
mommaof3boz's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2006
Posts: 1,520
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)

I think its very offensive to hear complete filth come out of peoples mouths in public places.  I'm not talking about a simple damn it or hell.  I'm talking "fu&^%$# bi$%^" or the C word or P word.  I think good manners are still important.  And its everyones right to sit in a public place and enjoy it.  There was another thread about how people shouldn't use derogatory terms for African-American folks and I agree.  The reason is because its offensive and degrading.  Well FUC& is offensive to me and my rights are important too.  There are words that are offensive no matter how you spin it and they shouldn't be used in public.

mommaof3boz is offline  
#26 of 44 Old 03-18-2011, 09:19 PM
 
Happiestever's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2007
Posts: 1,188
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)

I don't think I would say anything to an adult.  I have just moved away when language bothers me. Or if they are speaking to my kids, then it's a whole different ball game. I did hear my neighbor earlier today " So F'ing monday..we should go." Really- you had to use the F word before monday? It was just is such a weird context that I rolled my eyes just hearing the poor sentence spew forth.

Happiestever is offline  
#27 of 44 Old 03-19-2011, 07:03 AM
 
Join Date: Jan 2004
Posts: 4,722
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)

I would have moved tables or left.It is tough when you are out in public and have to deal with all sorts when you just want to have a nice time with the kiddos,but I would never ask someone else to tone it down.

mattemma04 is offline  
#28 of 44 Old 03-19-2011, 07:54 AM
 
meemee's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2005
Location: Norther California
Posts: 12,751
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 13 Post(s)


Quote:
Originally Posted by InMediasRes View Post

Would you have said something? Do you filter yourself in public situations?

nope. i take public transport and i never moved out of ear shot. it was all around us. i mean dd has been hearing it since she was a baby. her dad cant stop swearing and the world around us swears a lot. one reason i didnt mind is once dd got over saying the F word at 2 by 3 she knew the swear words werent socially acceptable and only used it in whisper voice around me (just so she could). 

 

i never, ever moved away mainly coz pretty soon in most cases the swearers noticed there was a child around them and they apologized and moved away or stopped swearing. it was actually quite sweet. even today at 8 people apologize and dd tells them 'oh its ok, i dont mind.'eyesroll.gif

 


 treehugger.gif Co-parent, joy.gifcold.gifbrand new homeschooling middle schoolerjoy.gif, and an attackcat.gif 
meemee is offline  
#29 of 44 Old 03-19-2011, 08:29 AM
 
Eyelet's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2009
Location: Illinois
Posts: 708
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)

My DH and I swear...sometimes a lot. bag.gif We really do try to censor ourselves in public, because it can easily offend someone and I can respect that. However, I don't mind it from others...and my kids will occasionally swear themselves. It's just a word to us and it's unavoidable to completely escape it.

 

So no, I personally wouldn't have moved tables. 


autismribbon.gif

Eyelet is offline  
#30 of 44 Old 03-19-2011, 12:16 PM
 
gbailey's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2009
Posts: 1,498
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)

We hear all kinds of words I'd rather DD not repeat on the subway, walking down the street, etc. from the f bomb to the n word. I'm pretty bold and confrontation can be my weakness but I would never ask anyone to stop cursing (except if in my home).I'd move if the language was that bothersome though. Fortunately, DD hasn't repeated anything but if she did I'd tell her not to use the word.

gbailey is offline  
Reply

Quick Reply
Message:
Drag and Drop File Upload
Drag files here to attach!
Upload Progress: 0
Options

Register Now

In order to be able to post messages on the Mothering Forums forums, you must first register.
Please enter your desired user name, your email address and other required details in the form below.
User Name:
If you do not want to register, fill this field only and the name will be used as user name for your post.
Password
Please enter a password for your user account. Note that passwords are case-sensitive.
Password:
Confirm Password:
Email Address
Please enter a valid email address for yourself.
Email Address:

Log-in

Human Verification

In order to verify that you are a human and not a spam bot, please enter the answer into the following box below based on the instructions contained in the graphic.



User Tag List

Thread Tools
Show Printable Version Show Printable Version
Email this Page Email this Page


Forum Jump: 

Posting Rules  
You may post new threads
You may post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are Off