Mother's Day - Mothering Forums

Forum Jump: 
 
Thread Tools
Old 03-24-2011, 01:58 PM - Thread Starter
 
Adaline'sMama's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2010
Posts: 4,757
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)

So, its still a ways off, but Im trying to figure something out before my MIL "decides" what we are doing. Last year we went out to eat at a place where she wanted to eat, and to walk around at a place that has some kind of historical meaning in the geneology of her family (this is what almost everything we ever do relates to....boring.) She is very much a planer. She has an *exact* picture of how everything will happen, and if anything is different from the way she wants it, she is grumpy for the rest of the day. It was about 2 hours away and we went to another historical town afterwards, and basically we spent the whole day with her. This is what Im sure she will expect to happen again this year. I dont want to do it. I didnt want to do it last year, but my grandmother was buried 2 days beforehand, so I didnt really care anything about anything during that weekend. I was a mess.

 

On fathers day last year, I woke DH up around 10 with coffee and breakfast, and asked what he wanted to do. He replied, "Oh, something fun. Whatever you want to take me to do". I made some calls and we were out the door and in the car on the way to Newport Aquarium (3 hours away) by noon. We had an awesome day. The babe looked at the fishies, we went out to eat, there was a surprise festival going on, and it was just awesome.

 

I want something like this. I dont want mothers day to be planned by me and DH's mom. I think its a time when someone else should celebrate you for what you do, and I think telling someone where to take me to eat or what to do for me is weird. I think it to be up to the people who are wishing you a happy mothers day. I want to tell dh, "wherever you want to take me" and NOT have the entire day dictated by his mother. So, Im trying to figure out how to tell DH this, and then how DH can make things short and sweet with his mom, so that the whole day isnt just about her. I mean, she has had mother's days for 30 years all her way because she has never had a MIL to share them with.


Holly and David partners.gif

Adaline love.gif (3/20/10), and Charlie brokenheart.gif (1/26/12- 4/10/12) and our identical  rainbow1284.gif  twins Callie and Wendy (01/04/13)

SIDS happens. 

Adaline'sMama is offline  
Sponsored Links
Advertisement
 
Old 03-24-2011, 02:18 PM
 
limabean's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2005
Posts: 9,431
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 11 Post(s)

I think it's fine to tell your DH how much you loved last Father's Day, and how much you'd love it if he would plan something fun for your little nuclear family to go do that day, with maybe a quick stop at his mom's house to give her flowers or have breakfast or whatever. And I totally understand your frustration that she just expects to dictate the day, without realizing that there's another mother around who might like to do something different. 

 

That said, we have a strict family rule about not getting hung up on The Day, so we'll often celebrate something the day or even the week before, if it's more convenient. So in your case, I'd be fine with having "your" Mother's Day on Saturday and then doing your MIL's thing on Sunday. I wouldn't feel like it diminished my celebration or anything. Or you have your DH tell his folks that you guys are busy all day on Sunday, but that you'd love to take her to lunch on Saturday to celebrate. Again, that sort of thing would be totally fine with, say, my mom, because she's completely on board with the "don't freak out about The Day" thing.

 

I just feel like the calendar isn't the boss of me, you know? We celebrate Christmas with my mom on the day after Thanksgiving because of logistical reasons, and you know what? It feels EXACTLY as special as the Christmas we celebrate on 12/25. 


DH+Me 1994 heartbeat.gif DS 2004 heartbeat.gif DD 2008 heartbeat.gif DDog 2014
limabean is offline  
Old 03-24-2011, 02:25 PM
 
Catubodua's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2008
Location: Connecticut
Posts: 1,423
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)

i was going to make a similar suggestion - let her have THAT day and have an awesome day with just your little family another time.  my family also doesn't get hung up on exactly which day things must happen on.  we celebrate christmas with my brother's family anywhere during the two week period before & after the 25th and with my SIL's family at the end of january.  works just fine for all of us. 

 

this is also a good way to think of it as mother's day day is the day you are helping your hubby celebrate with his mom, but your other day is all about you.  it'll also take the stressors out of the day for you b/c you're not constantly thinking about where else you should be.


mom to Andrew   born Feb 6th, already a mom to child with fur; and still missing and still wondering about the lost possibilities Mar 17, 2009
Catubodua is offline  
Old 03-24-2011, 02:29 PM - Thread Starter
 
Adaline'sMama's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2010
Posts: 4,757
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)

The problem with the whole it needing to be on "the day" is that its DH's busiest time of year, and there's no way he's taking more than one day a week off.


Holly and David partners.gif

Adaline love.gif (3/20/10), and Charlie brokenheart.gif (1/26/12- 4/10/12) and our identical  rainbow1284.gif  twins Callie and Wendy (01/04/13)

SIDS happens. 

Adaline'sMama is offline  
Old 03-24-2011, 02:35 PM
 
Catubodua's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2008
Location: Connecticut
Posts: 1,423
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)

so, have him tell mom that b/c of his work schedule he can't do mother's day with her on THE day and you guys will take care of her the next sunday or the sunday before.  or, you have to let it go and enjoy your mother's day the week before or the week after.

 

it's up to you if you want to get into a power struggle with your MIL through your husband or if you'd be willing to be flexible on how things will go.

 

and, edited to add - add this to the list of things to keep in mind when you become a MIL


mom to Andrew   born Feb 6th, already a mom to child with fur; and still missing and still wondering about the lost possibilities Mar 17, 2009
Catubodua is offline  
Old 03-24-2011, 06:42 PM
 
Italiamom's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2009
Location: Portland, OR
Posts: 2,414
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)

Like Limabean said, can you just ask to have it be mostly a day with just the immediate family unit?  Just tell your DH, "Hey, about mother's day...  I don't really care what we do, but I would like to spend the bulk of the day just our little family.  Obviously we need to spend some time with your mom, and I'd like that, but if it's possible I'd love to have most of the day to do other special stuff as just our little unit, especially since last mother's day was so hard with burying Grandma and all..."?

 

Letting your DH know that you'd like to spend as much of the day as just the small family unit as possible, isn't you planning out everything.  Just let him know that whatever he wants to do is fine, but that you need some relaxation more than anything smile.gif


Wife to DH geek.gif, mom to DS (4/09), and DD (8/11)fly-by-nursing2.gif, and crafty and hardworking in my own right!  In my parenting journey I've  delayedvax.gif, signcirc1.gif, familybed2.gif, h20homebirth.gif, andcd.gif.  To each family their own!!

 

 

"There are words for people like me, but I don't think there are very many."

Italiamom is offline  
Old 03-24-2011, 07:11 PM
 
HollyBearsMom's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2002
Location: nomans land
Posts: 6,006
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)

I probably shouldn't even post on this thread but I wish we had Mothers Day problems.

 

My husband's mom died before our son was born and I lost my mom 2 years ago. I know a lot of people have toxic Mothers and MIL but these ones were not.  We loved them and we miss them.  What I wouldn't give to have another Mothers day celebrating *my* mother and doing what made her happy.

 

When my kids are older I hope the will want to celebrate me-their mother. I and I hope I don't care what actual day it is.

 

 


Pardon me while I puke.gif

HollyBearsMom is offline  
Old 03-24-2011, 10:14 PM - Thread Starter
 
Adaline'sMama's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2010
Posts: 4,757
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)


Quote:
Originally Posted by HollyBearsMom View Post

I probably shouldn't even post on this thread but I wish we had Mothers Day problems.

 

My husband's mom died before our son was born and I lost my mom 2 years ago. I know a lot of people have toxic Mothers and MIL but these ones were not.  We loved them and we miss them.  What I wouldn't give to have another Mothers day celebrating *my* mother and doing what made her happy.

 

When my kids are older I hope the will want to celebrate me-their mother. I and I hope I don't care what actual day it is.
This was really touching to me. My grandma ( Mimi) was so much like a mother to me that this Mothers day will be so hard without her.

This was so touching to me.

 

My grandmother (Mimi) was so much like a mother to me that  I can hardly bear to go through this time of year without her. Id give just about anything to spend another holiday with her, especially since she collapsed Christmas eve and was never able to speak again. She, of all people, was the person I thought Id get to share motherhood with. My mother is exteremely toxic, and we havent spoken 6 months. She lives far away, so she wouldnt really be factored into our plans, but it does hurt to have her be estranged, regardless of how toxic she is. My marriage and mental stabality depend on me not contacting her. So, I even though I miss her dearly, I know it is important for me to keep my distance.

 

 

Oddly enough, my MIL called tonight and mentioned that it was "my turn" to pick what "we" do for Mothers day. While it is nice that she realized that last year was totally her deal, it lets me know that it will be a huge problem if I try to ask DH to take her out for breakfast and spend the rest of the day with me, especially since she told me that SIL is coming home from college for Mothers Day. They will all expect all of us to spend the whole day together. So much for it being stress free.


Holly and David partners.gif

Adaline love.gif (3/20/10), and Charlie brokenheart.gif (1/26/12- 4/10/12) and our identical  rainbow1284.gif  twins Callie and Wendy (01/04/13)

SIDS happens. 

Adaline'sMama is offline  
Old 03-24-2011, 10:25 PM
 
limabean's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2005
Posts: 9,431
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 11 Post(s)


Quote:
Originally Posted by Adaline'sMama View Post

Oddly enough, my MIL called tonight and mentioned that it was "my turn" to pick what "we" do for Mothers day. While it is nice that she realized that last year was totally her deal, it lets me know that it will be a huge problem if I try to ask DH to take her out for breakfast and spend the rest of the day with me, especially since she told me that SIL is coming home from college for Mothers Day. They will all expect all of us to spend the whole day together. So much for it being stress free.


 

Oh man. I don't understand the whole-day celebration! For us, Mother's Day is a very small holiday -- a bunch of flowers, a card, or a simple breakfast are all perfectly adequate gifts around here -- just an acknowledgement of the day and an "I love you." It's too bad that your DH's family seems to need to celebrate it in a way that you'd rather not, because then even when it's "your turn," you're not allowed to choose what you would really want.

 

I'd be a little annoyed too, but I probably wouldn't choose it as something to fight over. Try to see it as an opportunity to get together with your SIL and show your ILs a side of yourself (by choosing the activity), and have your "real" Mother's Day celebration another time when it can be just the way you want it. 


DH+Me 1994 heartbeat.gif DS 2004 heartbeat.gif DD 2008 heartbeat.gif DDog 2014
limabean is offline  
Old 03-25-2011, 01:45 AM
 
Italiamom's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2009
Location: Portland, OR
Posts: 2,414
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)

If it's "your turn," why not pick something awesome?  I had a friend who lost her own mom as a teenager, and she started going to a local nursing home on mothers day.  It was one of the really crappy, institutional ones.  She'd go and read to the old ladies, bring cookies, etc.  There are a lot of old grandmas who are just simply far from their kids.  It might be a really nice way to pay tribute to your grandma.

 

Or if you're feeling spiteful you could all go do something more labor intensive, like picking up park trash, or most communities have habitat restoration projects that involve planting and moving dirt...  What says "mother" more than doing hard, unpaid labor all day?


Wife to DH geek.gif, mom to DS (4/09), and DD (8/11)fly-by-nursing2.gif, and crafty and hardworking in my own right!  In my parenting journey I've  delayedvax.gif, signcirc1.gif, familybed2.gif, h20homebirth.gif, andcd.gif.  To each family their own!!

 

 

"There are words for people like me, but I don't think there are very many."

Italiamom is offline  
Old 03-25-2011, 04:53 AM
 
syn_ack89's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2007
Posts: 873
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Quote:
Originally Posted by Adaline'sMama View Post



This was so touching to me.

 

My grandmother (Mimi) was so much like a mother to me that  I can hardly bear to go through this time of year without her. Id give just about anything to spend another holiday with her, especially since she collapsed Christmas eve and was never able to speak again. She, of all people, was the person I thought Id get to share motherhood with. My mother is exteremely toxic, and we havent spoken 6 months. She lives far away, so she wouldnt really be factored into our plans, but it does hurt to have her be estranged, regardless of how toxic she is. My marriage and mental stabality depend on me not contacting her. So, I even though I miss her dearly, I know it is important for me to keep my distance.

 

 

Oddly enough, my MIL called tonight and mentioned that it was "my turn" to pick what "we" do for Mothers day. While it is nice that she realized that last year was totally her deal, it lets me know that it will be a huge problem if I try to ask DH to take her out for breakfast and spend the rest of the day with me, especially since she told me that SIL is coming home from college for Mothers Day. They will all expect all of us to spend the whole day together. So much for it being stress free.


I don't see why it's now a huge problem. Since it's your turn to pick what y'all do, just say "Great! We are going for breakfast. Then DH, the kids and I will leave and you can spend the rest of the day having quality time with SIL"

And just be prepared for her to try and keep you for the rest of the day and have some answers ready.

Never doubt that a small group of committed, thoughtful people can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. Margaret Mead
syn_ack89 is offline  
Old 03-25-2011, 08:35 AM - Thread Starter
 
Adaline'sMama's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2010
Posts: 4,757
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)


Quote:
Originally Posted by syn_ack89 View Post



I don't see why it's now a huge problem. Since it's your turn to pick what y'all do, just say "Great! We are going for breakfast. Then DH, the kids and I will leave and you can spend the rest of the day having quality time with SIL"

And just be prepared for her to try and keep you for the rest of the day and have some answers ready.


Id love to say this, but it just wont work. We live an hour away from her, so driving to have "breakfast" (she doesnt do anything before 10, ever) with her, and then going and doing something else without her would be a blatant slap in the face. Plus, SIL is only 19, and she just moved out of the house to college about 2 hours away. Their "quality time" would be SIL on facebook while MIL watched MSNBC.

 

 Now that she has stated that its "my turn" I just need to find something that I really want to do with everyone together and give up on the idea that it can be spontaneus and something that DH is doing for me, not something that Im requesting.



Quote:
Originally Posted by limabean View Post




 

Oh man. I don't understand the whole-day celebration! For us, Mother's Day is a very small holiday -- a bunch of flowers, a card, or a simple breakfast are all perfectly adequate gifts around here -- just an acknowledgement of the day and an "I love you." It's too bad that your DH's family seems to need to celebrate it in a way that you'd rather not, because then even when it's "your turn," you're not allowed to choose what you would really want.

 

I'd be a little annoyed too, but I probably wouldn't choose it as something to fight over. Try to see it as an opportunity to get together with your SIL and show your ILs a side of yourself (by choosing the activity), and have your "real" Mother's Day celebration another time when it can be just the way you want it. 



 

The idea that its such a huge ordeal is stressful to me and takes away all the feeling of being appreciated. It feels more like we are demanding that DH pay attention to us that day instead of being pleasantly surprised with breakfast and a small gift. I HATE that mothers day and birthdays are such a HUGE deal to MIL, but god forbid I try to make Christmas and Thanksgiving "stressful" by cooking food from scratch or making plans of any kind.

 

Its not going to cause a fight, its just something Im irritated about. Ill probably mention to DH my position about it being a day where other people celebrate you, not where I try to celebrate myself, and how once we have kids who are old enough to participate Id really like to stop this "my turn" , "your turn" nonesense. By then SIL will probably have kids or gotten married (she is only a freshman in college, so her coming home is also part of the reason that we have to spend the whole day together).

 

As far as having a "real" mothers day celebration another time, I think the amount of time we will already spend is too much, and I will not expect DH to celebrate it again another day. At that point, it would just be a fun day with the three of us, not really for Mothers Day (which is fine with me.)

 

 

I guess Ill keep within her tradition of picking somewhere that is a nice spring drive, going out to eat, and doing something fun.


Holly and David partners.gif

Adaline love.gif (3/20/10), and Charlie brokenheart.gif (1/26/12- 4/10/12) and our identical  rainbow1284.gif  twins Callie and Wendy (01/04/13)

SIDS happens. 

Adaline'sMama is offline  
Old 03-25-2011, 08:36 AM - Thread Starter
 
Adaline'sMama's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2010
Posts: 4,757
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)


Quote:
Originally Posted by syn_ack89 View Post



I don't see why it's now a huge problem. Since it's your turn to pick what y'all do, just say "Great! We are going for breakfast. Then DH, the kids and I will leave and you can spend the rest of the day having quality time with SIL"

And just be prepared for her to try and keep you for the rest of the day and have some answers ready.


Id love to say this, but it just wont work. We live an hour away from her, so driving to have "breakfast" (she doesnt do anything before 10, ever) with her, and then going and doing something else without her would be a blatant slap in the face. Plus, SIL is only 19, and she just moved out of the house to college about 2 hours away. Their "quality time" would be SIL on facebook while MIL watched MSNBC.

 

 Now that she has stated that its "my turn" I just need to find something that I really want to do with everyone together and give up on the idea that it can be spontaneus and something that DH is doing for me, not something that Im requesting.



Quote:
Originally Posted by limabean View Post




 

Oh man. I don't understand the whole-day celebration! For us, Mother's Day is a very small holiday -- a bunch of flowers, a card, or a simple breakfast are all perfectly adequate gifts around here -- just an acknowledgement of the day and an "I love you." It's too bad that your DH's family seems to need to celebrate it in a way that you'd rather not, because then even when it's "your turn," you're not allowed to choose what you would really want.

 

I'd be a little annoyed too, but I probably wouldn't choose it as something to fight over. Try to see it as an opportunity to get together with your SIL and show your ILs a side of yourself (by choosing the activity), and have your "real" Mother's Day celebration another time when it can be just the way you want it. 



 

The idea that its such a huge ordeal is stressful to me and takes away all the feeling of being appreciated. It feels more like we are demanding that DH pay attention to us that day instead of being pleasantly surprised with breakfast and a small gift. I HATE that mothers day and birthdays are such a HUGE deal to MIL, but god forbid I try to make Christmas and Thanksgiving "stressful" by cooking food from scratch or making plans of any kind.

 

Its not going to cause a fight, its just something Im irritated about. Ill probably mention to DH my position about it being a day where other people celebrate you, not where I try to celebrate myself, and how once we have kids who are old enough to participate Id really like to stop this "my turn" , "your turn" nonesense. By then SIL will probably have kids or gotten married (she is only a freshman in college, so her coming home is also part of the reason that we have to spend the whole day together).

 

As far as having a "real" mothers day celebration another time, I think the amount of time we will already spend is too much, and I will not expect DH to celebrate it again another day. At that point, it would just be a fun day with the three of us, not really for Mothers Day (which is fine with me.)

 

 

I guess Ill keep within her tradition of picking somewhere that is a nice spring drive, going out to eat, and doing something fun.


Holly and David partners.gif

Adaline love.gif (3/20/10), and Charlie brokenheart.gif (1/26/12- 4/10/12) and our identical  rainbow1284.gif  twins Callie and Wendy (01/04/13)

SIDS happens. 

Adaline'sMama is offline  
Old 03-25-2011, 09:10 AM
 
limabean's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2005
Posts: 9,431
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 11 Post(s)


Quote:
Originally Posted by Adaline'sMama View Post
I HATE that mothers day and birthdays are such a HUGE deal to MIL, but god forbid I try to make Christmas and Thanksgiving "stressful" by cooking food from scratch or making plans of any kind.


Oh, I remember that! You posted about it here, right? That would bug the snot out of me too. You have every right to vent about it here. I agree that when your kids are older you should put a stop to this "turns" thing. 

 

ETA: Boy, you sure had your MIL pegged when in your first post you said, "So, its still a ways off, but Im trying to figure something out before my MIL 'decides' what we are doing." And then during the course of the thread, sure enough, she called up and pretty much planned what you're doing while making it seem like she's letting you plan it! lol.gif


DH+Me 1994 heartbeat.gif DS 2004 heartbeat.gif DD 2008 heartbeat.gif DDog 2014
limabean is offline  
Old 03-31-2011, 08:08 PM
 
Emmeline II's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2006
Posts: 8,558
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)


Quote:
Originally Posted by limabean View Post

 

That said, we have a strict family rule about not getting hung up on The Day, so we'll often celebrate something the day or even the week before, if it's more convenient. So in your case, I'd be fine with having "your" Mother's Day on Saturday and then doing your MIL's thing on Sunday. I wouldn't feel like it diminished my celebration or anything.

 

I just feel like the calendar isn't the boss of me, you know? We celebrate Christmas with my mom on the day after Thanksgiving because of logistical reasons, and you know what? It feels EXACTLY as special as the Christmas we celebrate on 12/25. 

 

Us too. This year we had ds' 7th birthday party on his actual birthday for the first time EVER. For other holidays, like mother's day, we go out on another day because it's too crowded on the actual day--though I think the extent of Mother's/Father's day usually is that the honoree gets to sleep in, control the remote, and not cook dinnerlol.gif.
 

 


"It should be a rule in all prophylactic work that no harm should ever be unnecessarily inflicted on a healthy person (Sir Graham Wilson, The Hazards of Immunization, 1967)."
Emmeline II is offline  
Old 04-01-2011, 12:25 PM
 
gbailey's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2009
Posts: 1,450
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)

OP, is it you or your DH who gives your MIL all of the control regarding what you do as a family on holidays and special days like birthdays? I ask because there shouldn't be any reason why you can't have the kind of mothers day, Christmas or birthday you want. I'm not sure of the dynamics between you and your DH but if you continue to let MIL decide what you're doing on this day and that day then she'll be doing it for the rest of her life.

 

Is it important for your DH to do something for his mom on Mother's Day? If so, let him plan something you would both enjoy? Please correct me if I'm wrong (I might be totally off base) but you seem resentful that your MIL makes the decisions about what you and your family are going to be doing on this holiday or that holiday. If that bothers you, you need to talk to your DH about it. People only do what they're allowed to do.

 

gbailey is offline  
Old 04-01-2011, 09:34 PM - Thread Starter
 
Adaline'sMama's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2010
Posts: 4,757
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)

gbailey,

I would have to say that it is both of us. MIL is single, with two children, one of which is in college and still pretty dependent on her. The precedent that "if we dont go to Mom's, she'll be all alone" has been long set. DH is for sure considered the "man of the house" and she expects him to do things for her that most people would expect from their husbandn(or just do themselves.... )While I disagree with the fact that she makes desicions and she expects her children to still be "her children" (as opposed to DH being my spouse, not hers), I will say that if we didnt allow her to make these controlling decisions, she would be miserable and alone. I hope it wont last forever, and I am trying my best to steer them into more family based decisons, but I also dont want to rock the boat more than I have to. Bottom line is that MIL doesnt respect marriage as an entity, and she feels that HER family is DH, SIL and her (and now my child). Because she has never been in a successful marriage, she expects ours to fail. Therefore, she refuses to consider me as part of her family. Thankfully, after several years, DH has started to understand that OUR family has a right to be its own entity, so these holiday arrangements should change with his help (although, this past Chirstmas was supposed to be "mine" (first time at my house in EIGHT years) and MIL didnt give DD her gifts until we went and "had chirstmas" at her house, which I felt like negated the whole point of it being at my house to begin with...I dont want to have to celebrate it three times just so I can have Christmas Day at my house. Eff....we arent even christian).

 

 

Anyway, hopefully, DH will help me stand my ground about holidays, but as of now my plan for Mothers Day is as follows:

 

 

Sleep in

Ask DH to pack diaper bag, get baby dressed, and load up car

Put makeup on, WITHOUT a baby crying at me for attention

Go to a restaurant that I know EVERYONE likes

Take DD somewhere where we can all watch her have a good time (Park or Museum, some place where she will be entertained, and we will ALL be entertained by watching her)

Go home

Put the babe to bed

Have a couple of good microbrews with DH

If all goes well........s.e.x

 

 

You know, since Im having to "decide". It'd be nice if that was just a family Saturday.

 

At any rate, my point is to show her that im not "picking" where I want to go. Im making a desicion that will make everyone happy, and I hope that sets a precedent.


Holly and David partners.gif

Adaline love.gif (3/20/10), and Charlie brokenheart.gif (1/26/12- 4/10/12) and our identical  rainbow1284.gif  twins Callie and Wendy (01/04/13)

SIDS happens. 

Adaline'sMama is offline  
 
User Tag List

Thread Tools


Forum Jump: 

Posting Rules  
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are Off