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#61 of 145 Old 10-14-2011, 02:10 AM
 
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Honestly, I can't believe they nixed the magazine. The magazine WAS the original Mothering. I read the mag way before I joined MDC. I'm thinking of those beautiful, epic 1970s magazine covers. Mothering mag was how natural-minded mamas connected, learned, and shared wisdom way before the internet. The way in which the magazine was simply cancelled (and not announced, and not discussed) was the biggest indication of something not going right around here. I wish I could have been behind the scenes to see what master plan all the Mothering head honchos said. But I think I know. It coincided with the new format, the cheap-fake-food ads, the increased Facebook activity. It's called selling out, and of course it will water down, go more mainstream, etc. get boring! It's just not the same, which I'm totally sad about, because I really craved the knowledge and wisdom that I learned from the "veteran" mamas on MDC, and now the posts are just bland...shrug.gif


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#62 of 145 Old 10-14-2011, 06:06 AM
 
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I still think for me, it is a  to a certain extent the 'stage of mothering' im entering into. When you have a baby the first time, its all new. The attachment parenting paradigm is inspiring,  full of interesting facts, theories and controversies.  I even  got a sense of good self esteem, feeling i was doing a good job at mothering, and i felt confident in myself. 

 

But  now my kids are older, 3 and 6, and im entering a stage where  issues become more complex and individualized.  I cant always find the answers here or even similar dilemmas.I feel like as parents we face issues that are so different. Yes, children  exhibit similar tendencies at certain ages, but even there, i find temperament, and position in the family, to be bigger factors. 

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#63 of 145 Old 10-14-2011, 10:38 AM
 
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Originally Posted by contactmaya View Post

I still think for me, it is a  to a certain extent the 'stage of mothering' im entering into. When you have a baby the first time, its all new. The attachment parenting paradigm is inspiring,  full of interesting facts, theories and controversies.  I even  got a sense of good self esteem, feeling i was doing a good job at mothering, and i felt confident in myself. 

 

But  now my kids are older, 3 and 6, and im entering a stage where  issues become more complex and individualized.  I cant always find the answers here or even similar dilemmas.I feel like as parents we face issues that are so different. Yes, children  exhibit similar tendencies at certain ages, but even there, i find temperament, and position in the family, to be bigger factors. 



While it is true that there are far fewer simple answers as your kid gets older (mine is 11! ) I also really loved the magazine for being one of the few parenting magazines out there that didn't behave as though kids vanished when they turned 3.  When I read the print mag I was always so interested in the articles about older kids.. and of course that is gone now.

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#64 of 145 Old 10-14-2011, 03:19 PM
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Originally Posted by Adaline'sMama View Post

so, ssh, what made you come back to see this thread?


I saw it mentioned on TWWS too. Also I look around once in awhile, I just don't post. I thought since the question was asked, people might want to know. Some of us left because MDC became morally offensive.

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#65 of 145 Old 10-14-2011, 04:15 PM
 
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For me it's totally the format.  I've said over and over that they need to roll back to vbulliten.  I have to assume there is some contract that stops that because it's such an obvious step in the right direction, IMO.

Even right click to correct a spelling doesn't work here!  When the site changed I googled the people who did it and sure enough there are a ton of complaints from other forum owners.  The reply box sucks etc (ya think?).  


You know, I think this, above the deception issues with closing the magazine, the questionable ads, etc. is the main reason there aren't more members.  The platform they chose is the worst I've ever seen on a forum. 

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#66 of 145 Old 10-14-2011, 04:22 PM
 
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No, no. WorldCrossing was the worst platform-host I've ever encountered. And the Harry Potter Lexicon forum was there for more than nine years. And it was just dreadful. Until WorldCrossing closed shop. Whew!  Now the Lex forum is on phpBB and it's at least sane. 

 

Anyway.


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#67 of 145 Old 10-14-2011, 07:17 PM
 
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I used to be on a lot, several times a day.  I hate the new format with all the ads; I finally asked DH to fix it for me, so he blocked flash, which effectively removes most of the ads from my screen.  Still, it's irritating.  I miss the magazine; I also really liked reading the articles pertaining to older children.  I felt like Mothering gave me a perspective that I don't get anywhere else.  I really really miss that.  My oldest is now 13, and there just aren't many resources for parenting  teen in a kinder, gentler way.  I think it's very sad that MDC has moved so far from their original, stated ideals; I realize that keeping up with changing society and technology is difficult, but I don't think it's necessary to compromise so severely.  

 

 

What is TWWS?  

 

 

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#68 of 145 Old 10-14-2011, 09:21 PM
 
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Trolls with Wooden Spoons

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#69 of 145 Old 10-15-2011, 04:56 PM
 
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Originally Posted by contactmaya View Post

I still think for me, it is a  to a certain extent the 'stage of mothering' im entering into. When you have a baby the first time, its all new. The attachment parenting paradigm is inspiring,  full of interesting facts, theories and controversies.  I even  got a sense of good self esteem, feeling i was doing a good job at mothering, and i felt confident in myself. 

 

But  now my kids are older, 3 and 6, and im entering a stage where  issues become more complex and individualized.  I cant always find the answers here or even similar dilemmas.I feel like as parents we face issues that are so different. Yes, children  exhibit similar tendencies at certain ages, but even there, i find temperament, and position in the family, to be bigger factors. 



That is one of the reasons that my kid was not the primary topic of conversation for me here. She is 21 now, and was around 10 when I first came to the forums. I did appreciate that the magazine, which I started reading when she was a baby, was not limited to just pregnancy and young children. 

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#70 of 145 Old 10-15-2011, 05:03 PM
 
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Originally Posted by Viola View Post

Trolls with Wooden Spoons


is this the one that makes fun of MDC threads?

 


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#71 of 145 Old 10-15-2011, 05:13 PM
 
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It isn't just MDC that has slowed down. Many online forums, especially parenting forums, have slowed waaay down in recent years. Several have closed due to lack of activity. That being said, some of the recent changes don't help. The social group thing? I still have no clue how new members are supposed to find those and join. I haven't joined my own DDC's group yet.

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#72 of 145 Old 10-15-2011, 05:39 PM
 
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I still come here now and again, but have really stopped because of the trolls and lack of moderation. I now post on a local closed natural parenting forum.


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#73 of 145 Old 10-15-2011, 05:50 PM
 
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Originally Posted by cameragirl View Post

It isn't just MDC that has slowed down. Many online forums, especially parenting forums, have slowed waaay down in recent years. Several have closed due to lack of activity. That being said, some of the recent changes don't help. The social group thing? I still have no clue how new members are supposed to find those and join. I haven't joined my own DDC's group yet.


I found this rather...silly, myself.  I think they should be linked on the main forum page if people are really supposed to find them. 

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#74 of 145 Old 10-15-2011, 05:59 PM
 
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I found this rather...silly, myself.  I think they should be linked on the main forum page if people are really supposed to find them. 


The other thing that stinks about them? It appears that you can't DDCC to add your advice, comments, story, etc.

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#75 of 145 Old 10-15-2011, 06:46 PM
 
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Originally Posted by meemee View Post

is this the one that makes fun of MDC threads?

 



There's much more there than the one small subforum of snark.  Everyone here was OMG they only exist to bash MDC and just no.   Go over and look around with an open mind.


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#76 of 145 Old 10-15-2011, 08:18 PM
 
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I have never heard of TWWS.  Will have to check them out.  

 

The one thing I *really* appreciated about Mothering mag (and MDC way back when) was that yes, you could get stage-oriented parenting ideas, but it wasn't limited to that.  It was more about a lifestyle than just being a mom.  I liked that it supported those who parent outside that mainstream.  It was always such a gentle encouragement to me with each issue, well-researched, and supportive of choices outside the "norm".  I liked that the old forums challenged me to think about things differently, and even when I disagreed, I was not run into the ground for it.  Gosh, I miss the mag SO much!  I miss the old comfortable friend feeling I got when I pulled it out of the mailbox.

 

I guess what I miss the most is encouragement to follow my child's needs, to listen to what is really needed in the moment, to focus on what is really important, to slow down and just "be" with my child.  There really aren't very many places to get that sort of advice.  

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#77 of 145 Old 10-15-2011, 09:00 PM
 
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I used to love MDC.  It was my parenting home.  I joined in 2001 when my son was born and posted here for many years.  It is nothing like it used to be at all.  For me one of the biggest reasons I rarely post is the moderators.  We used to be able to have discusssions and call people on their crap if need be.  Now you can't say anything without someone smacking you on the hand for it.  They killed their own board.  It is sad. 

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#78 of 145 Old 10-16-2011, 06:04 AM
 
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I used to love MDC.  It was my parenting home.  I joined in 2001 when my son was born and posted here for many years.  It is nothing like it used to be at all.  For me one of the biggest reasons I rarely post is the moderators.  We used to be able to have discusssions and call people on their crap if need be.  Now you can't say anything without someone smacking you on the hand for it.  They killed their own board.  It is sad. 



I see people saying this, but I don't entirely get it.

 

I joined in 2006 and I vaguely remember a few heated discussions in the beginning.  Maybe this lack of moderation you refer to is before this?

 

Really, though, over the last several years (I would guess 2007 or 2008 onwards) it was heavily moderated.  It flirted somewhat briefly with no almost no moderation for a couple of months last Spring, and is now back to modding, although moderately, IMHO.

 

There were oodles and oodles of people on during 2007-2010 when it was heavily moderated.  Yes, I am sure MDC lost a few, but nothing like the leeching of members that has happened over the past year.

 

 

 

 

 

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#79 of 145 Old 10-16-2011, 07:03 AM
 
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I dont get the due date group thing either. I didnt sign up for the group. Im happy to stay where i am. Whats the point of it?

 

As for other online groups slowing down, ive gotta say, this is absolutely true for me too. All my usual online groups are withering away. It could be that technological changes are partly behind this. Its a pity.

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#80 of 145 Old 10-16-2011, 08:28 AM
 
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There were oodles and oodles of people on during 2007-2010 when it was heavily moderated.  Yes, I am sure MDC lost a few, but nothing like the leeching of members that has happened over the past year.

 

 

 

 

 


That pretty much supports the "it's the blatantly commercial, horribly executed redesign" theory, doesn't it?

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#81 of 145 Old 10-16-2011, 09:04 AM
 
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That pretty much supports the "it's the blatantly commercial, horribly executed redesign" theory, doesn't it?


I think this is a huge part of it. 

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#82 of 145 Old 10-16-2011, 12:17 PM
 
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The other thing that stinks about them? It appears that you can't DDCC to add your advice, comments, story, etc.

That happens here so much on Mothering now.. I can't chime in on a particular subject because you can't comment without joining the social club. Yuck!
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#83 of 145 Old 10-16-2011, 01:34 PM
 
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Philo:  which ones can't you "crash" now?  I didn't realize that.  I have never exactly understood the social club thing.  I found out about MDC after our LO was born, so I unfortunately never did the DDC thing.  I wish I could've, though, especially for when I had GD.  That was a nightmare and I could've used the support.

 

Thanks for filling me in.


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#84 of 145 Old 10-16-2011, 03:25 PM
 
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My understanding is that each social group leader can decide if the group is "locked" or not.  My DDC's Social Group isn't locked and anyone is allowed to post. 


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#85 of 145 Old 10-16-2011, 08:19 PM
 
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The whole social groups thing reminds me of gated communities. Unnecessary and serving no purpose but to exclude and make people feel like "members". eyesroll.gif

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#86 of 145 Old 10-17-2011, 11:03 AM
 
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I had no idea about the locked forums. Why did they do this?


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#87 of 145 Old 10-17-2011, 11:29 AM
 
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I had no idea about the locked forums. Why did they do this?


I have no idea but it makes the place feel very un-mothering.
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#88 of 145 Old 10-17-2011, 11:46 AM
 
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Originally Posted by *bejeweled* View Post

The whole social groups thing reminds me of gated communities. Unnecessary and serving no purpose but to exclude and make people feel like "members". eyesroll.gif


Are the due date groups like this? I sometimes drop in the february because  im due late january, so am actually closer to feb than jan. Guess i wont be able to do that anymore....

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#89 of 145 Old 10-17-2011, 01:48 PM
 
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I think, sadly, that it's the redesign and monetization.

 

MDC is not the first forum that I've watched do this.   My main parenting board (mainstream, but more specific to certain medical issues) did this several years ago.

 

The design gets "old," supposedly.

The site owners/operators, worried that new people may think the site looks "Old fashioned," or thinking they'd like to make some money from the site,  decide to update things.

They hire a "Web Designer" to do a complete redesign of the site.

The designer is generally not a user of the site, not a member of the group the site is meant to represent, and often appears to not even be a regular user of web forums.

The designer creates a site that looks flashy, impresses the owners/operators -- but is nearly completely unusable.

 

Oldtimers drift away from the changed site.

New people who find the site through google (or other means) look at the forums. Because the oldtimers are drifting away from the changed site, there's little traffic in the areas the newcomers are interested in.  The Newcomers don't stick around.

 

As oldtimers continue to drift away, the site slowly withers.

 

 

It's my experience that many of these so-called "Web Design Firms" have little interest in site useability.   They're either straight graphic designers who don't care about how the site is used as long as it *looks* good, or they are straight click-count optimizers, who don't care about how people use the site as long as people have to click past lots of ads.    They don't know a lot about data architechture, or information theory, or anything about how people actually access, read, and use information.   They don't bother to do usability testing, where you sit down with some "typical users" and analyze what they do (click counts and history are not enough to understand this).

 

The fact is, the most devoted audience in the world will not stick around a site that has been redesigned into unusability.   And MDC's redesign rendered it almost unusuable -- the number of ads wrapped around the text were distracting and took forever to load, many ads seemed to crash most browsers, the ad-wrapping made the text unreadably small on portable digital devices.   Some of the ads were are videos with voiceovers.   There were ads on both sides of the main text column...

 

Then on top of that, many of the ads were totally contrary to MDC's stated mission.

 

I'm saying "were," because I notice that right now, I'm not actually seeing ads for BPA-laden, preservative-filled, wastefully-packaged single-serve noodle cups to the left of my screen.  But that seems, to my memory, to be a relatively new development.

 

And if its not a new development?  If those ads have been gone for weeks or months? 

What that illustrates is what a bad redesign can do.   I now think of MDC as "OMG, that awful design with all the ads that crashes both Firefox and Safari all the time."    And I know I'm not the only one.

 


I actually was paid a handsome sum of money for one hour of my time with the company that redesigned MDC. They acted like a fly on the wall and just watched the way I interacted with the site. As far as not using MDC themselves, I asked if the person interviewing me was on here much and he said he is never really on here. Doesn't really have a reason to.

 


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#90 of 145 Old 10-17-2011, 03:24 PM
 
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Are the due date groups like this? I sometimes drop in the february because  im due late january, so am actually closer to feb than jan. Guess i wont be able to do that anymore....


You can ask to join both groups. We were told that our DDC would be closed one month after our month is over, so sometime in April of 2012. Then it is a social group only. That means we can't access our old threads if I understand correctly.

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