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#1 of 75 Old 01-29-2005, 03:38 PM - Thread Starter
 
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OKAY THIS IS DRIVING ME FRICKIN MAD!!!!! Is this not a DISCUSSION board?

Honestly, I consider this so insulting and ego-driven. It's almost like saying, "don't care what the rest of you have to contribute, but let me just tell you what I've got to say."

I'd like to respectfully submit that if you don't have "time" to read, maybe you don't have "time" to post. How do you know you're not being redundant if you don't read the previous posts? How do you know that the topic hasn't been resolved already, a decision made & your post is totally irrelevant?

Part of being inconsiderate involves not considering others.

Can I get a hallelujah ???!!!!???!!!

PS, and yes, I'm PMSing, OK I admit it
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#2 of 75 Old 01-29-2005, 03:41 PM
 
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ita

i may be pmsing too, but i think this everytime i read that statement
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#3 of 75 Old 01-29-2005, 03:43 PM
 
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Oooh, I don't know. I think that sometimes, it's okay to chime in to offer an opinion or support to the OP without going through five other pages of posts first. I love the discussion aspect, but sometimes just want to squeeze a thought or an offer of support in in the two minutes I have before my toddler finishes nursing and needs my attention, kwim? In the times that I do that, I'm not dissing everybody else and I NEVER feel that my post trumps the discussion. I'm just responding to the OP's original request. It's simply not always true that time to read and time to post are equated.
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#4 of 75 Old 01-29-2005, 03:49 PM
 
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Sometimes I don't read the posts on a controversial topic, because reading everyone else's opinion confuses my own, and I want to post my first thoughts on the subject. Usually, I then go back and read the rest of the posts, unless the topic is like, 5 pages long, then I just read the first and last pages. Maybe it's egotistical, but at least my true opinion is heard, and as you said, this *is* a discussion board, and I contribute my OWN opinion to it.
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#5 of 75 Old 01-29-2005, 03:52 PM
 
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i understand the frutration, but i agree with rachel... i think its sort of ok etiquette when you DO state you havent read everything so they understand why you are being redundant. i think its less "polite" or whatever if you skim, then dont preface with an "i skimmed'

although in the long run its not a big deal either way. i think when someone posts at all, they are showing support/interest in your topic and thats part of what boards are for. redundancy sometimes shows that the experiece discussed is common, and that can be reassuring , even tho its annoying from time to time
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#6 of 75 Old 01-29-2005, 03:56 PM - Thread Starter
 
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But if you have two minutes, wouldn't it be well spent reading other mama's opinions & experiences? And come back when you have another two minutes to make sure your post is relevant?

Lots of times I see the discussion get more & more in depth, and on the 3rd page someone comes in and posts something that no longer has anything to do with anything!

I do see your point about like "congratulations on your baby" posts--no need to read all the congrats, but skim them, maybe?


Off topic, I was born in Boston Rachel, in the backseat of a car on E.Berkeley Street...think of me when you drive by there, k?
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#7 of 75 Old 01-29-2005, 04:02 PM
 
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I didn't read all the posts here, but let me tell ya what I think. Just jerking your chain mountain. Probably a dangerous thing to do when you are PMS-ing. :LOL

I usually try to read all the posts, but I have sometimes said I haven't read them all, posted, then gone back later when I had time and read them. I think it may be harder for moms with little ones who need more attention to read the really long threads...

"Be kind, for everyone you meet is fighting a hard battle." -Plato
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#8 of 75 Old 01-29-2005, 04:10 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by mountain
But if you have two minutes, wouldn't it be well spent reading other mama's opinions & experiences? And come back when you have another two minutes to make sure your post is relevant?
But then what happens if you come back when you have another 2 minutes and there are 5 more pages to the thread? I can't tell you how many times I've seen the title to a thread and thought, "as soon as I have more time I'll read that one" while there were only 10-15 posts, then come back a few hours later to find that it now says "go to page 1, 2, 3, 4, 5.....Last Page". At that point, I'll read the first few posts and if I have anything to contribute I'll read the last few posts to see if there are any new developments and then post myself. If I have more time later I'll read the rest of the thread.
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#9 of 75 Old 01-29-2005, 04:15 PM
 
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[QUOTE=tinybutterfly
I think it may be harder for moms with little ones who need more attention to read the really long threads...[/QUOTE]

Yup - that would be me. My computer time has to happen while ds is occupied and dd is nursing down for a nap. If I wait til she's asleep, the noisy AOL hookup sounds wake her up!

I do usually read more than I write. And I do try to read all of the responses. But on a topic that interests me, or resonates with something in my life, I don't always have time to read 5 or 6 pages of responses. I do try to save those responses for someone who has asked for an opinion or support.

See if you can snag some chocolate, Mountain. That always takes the edge off my PMS.
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#10 of 75 Old 01-29-2005, 04:17 PM
 
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What I do is look for posts from the OP for updates then I post if I don't have time to read the whole thread. But I usually read the whole thing if I post to the thread. I don't post alot but read lots. I have learned so much just hanging out and reading.

Doreen
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#11 of 75 Old 01-29-2005, 04:18 PM
 
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I agree that in some cases it is ok. If the OP is asking for advice on a specific topic and the responder does not want to read everyone's advice they should not have to.
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#12 of 75 Old 01-29-2005, 04:19 PM
 
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As many described I have the small one syndrome. Hence an inability to read through. Although rarely do I post, I then just think about it and wish I had time to post.
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#13 of 75 Old 01-29-2005, 04:24 PM
 
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Ya I do this too if I don't have time to read a whole long thread and the mama is looking for lots of input and I feel I have something to contribute.

Otoh, sometimes there is a thread that diverts a lot from the original post, and it is really obvious that some posters haven't read the discussion. This I find irritating, but not if they SAY "haven't read whole thread blahblah."

Just my 2 cents... btw I read the whole thread.
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#14 of 75 Old 01-29-2005, 04:28 PM
 
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I can understand it though.
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#15 of 75 Old 01-29-2005, 04:46 PM
 
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but does one need to say it though?

I understand if it is a fluff thread, but sometimes there are threads where there is an update/add more info and people skip over the update and post about the original situation. That is what bugs me at times.

ETA: hallelujah
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#16 of 75 Old 01-29-2005, 04:51 PM
 
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sometiems people will ask a clear question, the thread grows independent, reaches 5 pages and then someone coems and answers the original question...what's wrong with that?
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#17 of 75 Old 01-29-2005, 04:52 PM - Thread Starter
 
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ooooooo tiny butterfly



ok, thanks for letting me vent, and that is a wonderful thing. it just seems lately everywhere I looked there was a post that said that.

Thismama, it just seems more annoying to me when they do admit they cranked the whole thread off topic because they didn't read other mama's replies! You're kinder than I am!

I just feel like everyone's got an opinion I haven't yet been exposed to & it only benefits my & my psyche to consider different versions of the truth. I'll slog through a 5 page thread if it's something that would better my mothering. If it's not relevent to me to learn the perspectives, I search for another thread without replying. Hence my low amt of posts in 3 years of this site...

Ebethmom, I sure do have a chunk o' dark chocolate in the fridge. Last month the kids found it, so I hid it well this time Hey, can you turn down the volume (Function + Page Dn button) when you dial up AOL? I can tho' I don't use AOL.


Babybug, I think about the posts too! Sometimes I'll think about em overnight & come back to post---don't mind if the thread is long. Thirsty for knowledge here.

I guess I understand it too, Irish. I just don't like it!!!

Oh, just had to add that I didn't care to read any of the posts on this thread. And there should be a law about posting while PMSing.
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#18 of 75 Old 01-29-2005, 05:01 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by splendid

ETA: hallelujah

:LOL
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#19 of 75 Old 01-29-2005, 05:09 PM
 
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Are you eating your chocolate yet, mountain? It's good for whatever ails you.

"Be kind, for everyone you meet is fighting a hard battle." -Plato
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#20 of 75 Old 01-29-2005, 05:09 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by mountain
And there should be a law about posting while PMSing.

Hallelujah!!!!!!!!!




Oops, was that the wrong answer? Or the right answer, to the wrong question? :

Every baptized Christian is, or should be, someone with an actual (disturbing) experience, ... a close encounter, with God; someone who, as a result, becomes a disturbing presence to others. - Fr. Anthony J. Gittins, A Presence That Disturbs
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#21 of 75 Old 01-29-2005, 05:27 PM
 
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What she said!!!

Quote:
Originally Posted by RachelGS
Oooh, I don't know. I think that sometimes, it's okay to chime in to offer an opinion or support to the OP without going through five other pages of posts first. I love the discussion aspect, but sometimes just want to squeeze a thought or an offer of support in in the two minutes I have before my toddler finishes nursing and needs my attention, kwim? In the times that I do that, I'm not dissing everybody else and I NEVER feel that my post trumps the discussion. I'm just responding to the OP's original request. It's simply not always true that time to read and time to post are equated.
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#22 of 75 Old 01-29-2005, 05:29 PM
 
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You are preaching to the choir. When I read
"Haven't read all the responses, but here's what I think/do"
What I am hearing is
"I don't really give a rat's ass what the rest of you are bringing to the party, Magnificent Me has the answer right here"

However, I am notorious for reading subtext where there is none...
Annette

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#23 of 75 Old 01-29-2005, 05:41 PM
 
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The reason why I always do that is because I like to get my thoughts out before everyone else's responses affect my own (especially if the thread is long). Then I always go back and read through the thread and, if I realize the issue has already been solved or whatever, then I post again with an apology or clarification. :LOL That's just me. We all have our ways. That's the beauty of online discussion.



(Sorry if this issue has been resolved or if I am being redundant, I haven't read all the posts yet but I will be sure to do that right now! )


ETA: I just read through everyone's posts, and YES all of your opinions DO matter to me! :LOL
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#24 of 75 Old 01-29-2005, 05:51 PM
 
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well i didn't read what everyone else said, but I think you're right on!

Sahm mom to three lovely girls, and happily married to a great, sweet guy
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#25 of 75 Old 01-29-2005, 05:52 PM
 
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:LOL

Sahm mom to three lovely girls, and happily married to a great, sweet guy
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#26 of 75 Old 01-29-2005, 05:55 PM
 
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Personally I dont have a problem with people saying that, least they are honest.

Chocolate, go eat some PLEEEEEEEEESE :LOL
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#27 of 75 Old 01-29-2005, 06:07 PM
 
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I end up not posting on long threads unless I get in on the ground floor, so to speak, exactly because of this - I don't have time to read 5-7 pages of responses and I feel it's a little ignorant of me to just jump in without reading what everyone else has said.

This actually bums me out, sometimes - I think I end up missing out on some really great discussions, and you all miss out on hearing my brilliant observations, which of course is the *real* tragedy here, lol.
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#28 of 75 Old 01-29-2005, 06:12 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by famousmockngbrd

This actually bums me out, sometimes - I think I end up missing out on some really great discussions, and you all miss out on hearing my brilliant observations, which of course is the *real* tragedy here, lol.

Okay, I'm reading along agreeing that I surely must miss out on some great discussions cuz there are alot of threads I don't even get to read...and then we get to the tragedy of missing your brilliant observations and I am laughing my self silly! FMB, you are too funny! I really do appreciate your sense of humor!

"Be kind, for everyone you meet is fighting a hard battle." -Plato
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#29 of 75 Old 01-29-2005, 06:15 PM
 
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TB, if I had actually read your post, I'd be blushing.
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#30 of 75 Old 01-29-2005, 06:17 PM
 
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really don't care if people read all the posts before responding. The important part is reading the OPs posts especially if it's a personal issue.
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