When the kids are young, as most of you know
people felt free to question my every decision. It's been a long time since I felt mysefl in the the position of explaining myself.
WE've decided to send dd18 to a private college. Welll, she applied to all the state schools and didn't get in, the private one took her. Every agency we've been to (she has very severe learning disabilities and is entitled to some help, or we're been looking for scholarships) teh staff all feel they neeed to question WHY she isn't going to a local community college.
It would, they say, save us huge money, and if she transfered for her final two years, "No one would ever know." That bugs me. IF the schools are so good, why would we care
Besides, the savings aren't that great. If she goes to the private school for two years and THEN transfers to a good state school, which have some of the best special ed programs. (she wants to teach special ed) Wanna do some math?
The private college is $28,300 per year. That covers all of her food, (including a ton of snacks) room, Red sox tickets for a game this fall, free movie tickets about once a month, all of her classes, free bus pass, events and activities every month, etc. She qualified for $13,000 worth of fin aid from the school, bringing her total to $15,300. ( some other aid would apply to either school, I didn't count that)
The commmuntiy college is $4064 per year. That covers her courses and an $18 donation to Masspirg, (where she worked for one day and was fired!). THere are a few activities on campus that would also cover. She would need a car, and becasue we live 2 miles down a dirt road and 28 miles from the school, that would mean a GOOD car with front wheel drive, say $8,000. Imagining a car that got 28 miles to the gallon, gas would come to $1000, and then she'd need SOMETHING, tires, brakes, you know the stuff that breaks on cars, lets guess $500. Oil changes, another $100. No food is included. I can't figure her food costs, since I'd be feeding her...but at $30 a week, it would be about
$800. THat wouldn't include hanging out in the cafeteria with friends or free snacks at the events thrown at the private school. Or tickets to movies, Red Sox games etc. Or any socializing. I'd imagine she spends about $1000 a year now on movie tickets, going out to eat with a friend. 14,464, not counting that last $1000 for socializing.
Ok, I know that the car would last more than a year. I also know I didn't count everything that's paid for at school. Even if you prorate the car, the difference still isn't enough to pay for my peace of mind, or her opportunities. The community college is off a majr highway and she'd have to drive every day, getting on the only ramp that enters on the LEFT side where the speed limit is 65. I
say a prayer every time I get on there. I'd be a wreck with her doing it. Also, since her disability is language based and affects her ability to socialize easily, we felt that a school where she'd be immersed in lots of activities would be the best choice for HER.
She's taking out the loans, she'lll be paying them back. (in the end she only needs to borrow about $6000 per year
) The agencies DON'T give her extra for attending a private school. So why do they care?
I'd like to print this up and give it to the next fool who thinks to question our decision!
Warning! This is a rant and should be treated as such! Telling me I'm wrong, my math is bad or that the agency people are right because.........will only get me going!
Now I remember how EVERYONE thought it was up to them to ask why I was nursing, why I was nursing twins, did nursing make my breasts sag like that (True question!), why I was using cloth when disposables were so much more convenient, why I didn't get a job and put my kids in day care, why I thought I was competent to homeschool my ds, etc, etc, etc.
Thanks! I needed that!