(Update #21 w/ new advice request!) advice about giving out email - Mothering Forums
Forum Jump: 
 
Thread Tools
#1 of 24 Old 08-06-2008, 03:51 PM - Thread Starter
 
mimim's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2003
Posts: 2,574
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
So, I've been using OKCupid, a dating site, and this one guy whom I've exchanged just a couple of messages with gave me an outside email addy to reply to.

Should I reply from the address I use most of the time? I only have two active email accounts right now and one is not appropriate for this stuff at all - the other is my primary. My dummy account got deactivated for lack of use. I could open an new one I guess, but that seems like a pita.

He seems totally like my type and is adorable and seems sincere...
I'm still nervous of stalkers though.

Rainbow.gif ~ Molly
mimim is offline  
#2 of 24 Old 08-06-2008, 03:54 PM
 
*clementine*'s Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2004
Posts: 4,420
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Open a new account.
*clementine* is offline  
#3 of 24 Old 08-06-2008, 03:56 PM
 
kama'aina mama's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2001
Location: Watching Top Chef, eating Top Ramen
Posts: 21,301
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 1 Post(s)
I would open a fresh, new gmail account. Not just cuz he might be creepy or someone else you want to email with might be... though that is a valid point....

I sort of like to compartmentalise my online communication. It helps me organize my time. If I'm not supposed to waste time this morning on social email I don't open the account I use for socializing... Also, if I am using an addy with unknown people whose behaviors I don't know I want to be sure I'm not gonna end up buried in SPAM at my primary site.
kama'aina mama is offline  
#4 of 24 Old 08-06-2008, 04:04 PM
 
Mama Mko's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2007
Location: Under the Stars
Posts: 1,519
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
I would open a new gmail acount too. It's easy and useful.

Live and love with your whole being.
Mama Mko is offline  
#5 of 24 Old 08-06-2008, 04:05 PM - Thread Starter
 
mimim's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2003
Posts: 2,574
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
OK

I don't know why I even asked. I already knew the answer.


Did I mention that he's adorable??



And hey, I hit 2000!

Rainbow.gif ~ Molly
mimim is offline  
#6 of 24 Old 08-06-2008, 04:10 PM
 
katie9143's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2006
Location: andover, ma
Posts: 5,388
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
i would use my reg email.....but im just like that and everyone i know used to get on my case when i was using online dating. it never occurred to me back then to get another. i figured that it didnt give any info about me and if someone emailed me that i didnt want to talk to i would just erase the emails. kwim? i would be more leary when giving out my phone number or address.

Mama to Amelia - age 6

katie9143 is offline  
#7 of 24 Old 08-06-2008, 04:12 PM
 
*clementine*'s Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2004
Posts: 4,420
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Quote:
Originally Posted by mimim View Post
OK

I don't know why I even asked. I already knew the answer.


Did I mention that he's adorable??



And hey, I hit 2000!
That's good luck! To hit 2000 on the post about an adorable guy. It's soooo too bad you can't post his picture on here, his entire profile, and let us pick him apart and analyse him for you. If we liked him, and you went on a date, we could attach a mini webcam to you and go live.
Does that make ME the creepy one now?
*clementine* is offline  
#8 of 24 Old 08-06-2008, 04:15 PM
 
Mama Mko's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2007
Location: Under the Stars
Posts: 1,519
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Quote:
Originally Posted by *clementine* View Post
Does that make ME the creepy one now?
Yes.

Live and love with your whole being.
Mama Mko is offline  
#9 of 24 Old 08-06-2008, 04:20 PM
 
whateverdidiwants's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2003
Location: Exiled in Bi-ville
Posts: 3,056
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Quote:
Originally Posted by katie9143 View Post
i would use my reg email.....but im just like that and everyone i know used to get on my case when i was using online dating. it never occurred to me back then to get another. i figured that it didnt give any info about me and if someone emailed me that i didnt want to talk to i would just erase the emails. kwim? i would be more leary when giving out my phone number or address.
But if you use that email to sign in to your Facebook or Myspace accounts, it would be easy for someone to find out a lot more about you than you want them to. Especially with Facebook showing your full name, it would make it easy to find where you live if your name is unique.
whateverdidiwants is offline  
#10 of 24 Old 08-06-2008, 04:26 PM - Thread Starter
 
mimim's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2003
Posts: 2,574
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Quote:
Originally Posted by *clementine* View Post


That's good luck! To hit 2000 on the post about an adorable guy. It's soooo too bad you can't post his picture on here, his entire profile, and let us pick him apart and analyse him for you. If we liked him, and you went on a date, we could attach a mini webcam to you and go live.
Does that make ME the creepy one now?

I wish I could do that. I could use the advice. I haven't dated in 15 years. I was just a kid when I got together with my DH and we only separated last December.

Rainbow.gif ~ Molly
mimim is offline  
#11 of 24 Old 08-06-2008, 04:30 PM
 
Ruthla's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2004
Location: Long Island, NY
Posts: 47,873
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 3 Post(s)
Eh, skip the email and just give him your home phone number and address.



Seriously, open a new account for this. It's worth the security in case he turns out to be some kind of creep.

Ruth, single mommy to Leah, 19, Hannah, 18, and Jack, 12
Ruthla is offline  
#12 of 24 Old 08-06-2008, 04:34 PM
 
*clementine*'s Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2004
Posts: 4,420
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Quote:
Originally Posted by mimim View Post
I wish I could do that. I could use the advice. I haven't dated in 15 years. I was just a kid when I got together with my DH and we only separated last December.
You'll be fine. Keep us updated though.
*clementine* is offline  
#13 of 24 Old 08-06-2008, 05:19 PM
 
katie9143's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2006
Location: andover, ma
Posts: 5,388
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Quote:
Originally Posted by whateverdidiwants View Post
But if you use that email to sign in to your Facebook or Myspace accounts, it would be easy for someone to find out a lot more about you than you want them to. Especially with Facebook showing your full name, it would make it easy to find where you live if your name is unique.
i guess i just assumed if she was super careful about stuff online then she probably wouldnt give her full name on myspace or the like and would not put her email as public or searchable either. i just hate having lots of emails and pws.

Mama to Amelia - age 6

katie9143 is offline  
#14 of 24 Old 08-06-2008, 05:42 PM
 
maliceinwonderland's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2005
Posts: 1,826
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Quote:
Originally Posted by *clementine* View Post


That's good luck! To hit 2000 on the post about an adorable guy. It's soooo too bad you can't post his picture on here, his entire profile, and let us pick him apart and analyse him for you. If we liked him, and you went on a date, we could attach a mini webcam to you and go live.
Does that make ME the creepy one now?
Will you marry me?

OP - I would open a new gmail account too. Good luck, I hope he's as wonderful as he is adorable
maliceinwonderland is offline  
#15 of 24 Old 08-06-2008, 05:56 PM
 
Autumn Breeze's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2003
Location: with the Geek in the Pink
Posts: 15,077
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
G-mail rocks! go for gmail! If you have more than 1 gmail account, you can have them all go to one, and choose which reply address you use.

~Autumn~   Mama to whistling.gif (2001) and hearts.gif(2005) partners.gif madly in love since '99 
Autumn Breeze is offline  
#16 of 24 Old 08-07-2008, 10:40 AM - Thread Starter
 
mimim's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2003
Posts: 2,574
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
OK, I opened a new gmail and wrote to him last night. BUT, I forgot to take my full name out of the label on outgoing mail So now he will know my first and last name. If he IS creepy he'll be able to find my address online.
I've changed it now, but too late for that 1st one. Argh, I'm bad at this.

Rainbow.gif ~ Molly
mimim is offline  
#17 of 24 Old 08-07-2008, 10:49 AM
 
Autumn Breeze's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2003
Location: with the Geek in the Pink
Posts: 15,077
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
when it's all said and done, you can also completely delete a gmail account.

~Autumn~   Mama to whistling.gif (2001) and hearts.gif(2005) partners.gif madly in love since '99 
Autumn Breeze is offline  
#18 of 24 Old 08-08-2008, 08:36 AM
 
SevenVeils's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2006
Location: Lurking in my Lerkim
Posts: 6,864
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Quote:
Originally Posted by maliceinwonderland View Post
Will you marry me?


SevenVeils is offline  
#19 of 24 Old 08-08-2008, 09:22 AM
 
Jessy1019's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2006
Location: Flemington, NJ
Posts: 3,514
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
I think people worry too much.

I would have just given out my regular email address (which would definitely allow people to find my full name, address, phone number, writings, etc). So he has your full name . . . odds are, he's not a stalker. Relax!

And good luck with the new guy!

Proud Anti-Adoption, Atheist, Reproductive-Freedom Fighter Mama
Rylie is 7, Ronin is 3.5
Jessy1019 is offline  
#20 of 24 Old 08-08-2008, 09:45 AM
 
JesseMomme's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2002
Location: not here anymore
Posts: 8,278
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
I have an acct for my every day stuff and a different acct. for automated, spammy type stuff that I'm pretty sure nothing about me is tied to. Just open another acct.
JesseMomme is offline  
#21 of 24 Old 08-09-2008, 07:03 PM - Thread Starter
 
mimim's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2003
Posts: 2,574
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
So he never wrote back. WTF? It's been since Wed night and no reply. Was he collecting women's emails or something?
Oh well, too bad for him.

BUT I just made a date with another guy for tonight He seems really nice. I'm so excited. It's my first date since I split with my DH last fall.

I don't know what to wear. We're meeting at a casual place for a beer, but it's in a really trendy part of town. It's going to be low 70's slight chance of rain tonight. My usual outfit is a skirt/tank or tee/ and flip flops. Or should I wear jeans? Dressier shoes?

Eek! I guess I'm a little nervous.

Rainbow.gif ~ Molly
mimim is offline  
#22 of 24 Old 08-09-2008, 07:08 PM
 
Autumn Breeze's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2003
Location: with the Geek in the Pink
Posts: 15,077
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Dress like you usually would, see if you can check out the place online if you've never been there.

Seriously, the point of it all is to meet someone you like who likes you right? Don't dress up, dress as usual, and you can still make a good impression


HAVE FUN!!!

~Autumn~   Mama to whistling.gif (2001) and hearts.gif(2005) partners.gif madly in love since '99 
Autumn Breeze is offline  
#23 of 24 Old 08-09-2008, 07:16 PM - Thread Starter
 
mimim's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2003
Posts: 2,574
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Quote:
Originally Posted by AutumnBreeze View Post
Dress like you usually would, see if you can check out the place online if you've never been there.

Seriously, the point of it all is to meet someone you like who likes you right? Don't dress up, dress as usual, and you can still make a good impression


HAVE FUN!!!
Yeah, I already checked the place online. It's very casual, but it will be full of people doing their pre-club eating and drinking. If I was going with girlfriends I would dress to impress, but I'd definitely be going elsewhere afterwards.

Rainbow.gif ~ Molly
mimim is offline  
#24 of 24 Old 08-09-2008, 07:20 PM
 
Autumn Breeze's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2003
Location: with the Geek in the Pink
Posts: 15,077
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Can you compromise? Dress to impress....yourself? So you're comfortable, but feel like you're looking hot?

Go with that

~Autumn~   Mama to whistling.gif (2001) and hearts.gif(2005) partners.gif madly in love since '99 
Autumn Breeze is offline  
Reply

Quick Reply
Message:
Drag and Drop File Upload
Drag files here to attach!
Upload Progress: 0
Options

Register Now

In order to be able to post messages on the Mothering Forums forums, you must first register.
Please enter your desired user name, your email address and other required details in the form below.
User Name:
If you do not want to register, fill this field only and the name will be used as user name for your post.
Password
Please enter a password for your user account. Note that passwords are case-sensitive.
Password:
Confirm Password:
Email Address
Please enter a valid email address for yourself.
Email Address:

Log-in

Human Verification

In order to verify that you are a human and not a spam bot, please enter the answer into the following box below based on the instructions contained in the graphic.



User Tag List

Thread Tools
Show Printable Version Show Printable Version
Email this Page Email this Page


Forum Jump: 

Posting Rules  
You may post new threads
You may post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are Off