Oh- I put the pictures up on my blog (http://lifeofasahm-lisa.blogspot.com/2011/01/introducing.html) it was an over the belly u/s so the pictures are not as clear as a vaginal ultrasound, but i was THRILLED to be able to stay dressed!!
very cute pics :) I was also thrilled to get an abdominal u/s, lol.
Missing 9/1/10 @ 15 weeks, and 2/14/11 @ 13 weeks
Add me to the nauseous list. It hit me full force about a week ago and i feel green all day long. MAJOR food aversion going on. I am also so, so tired. Being at work all day is so hard, I would kill for a nap most days. I don't remember feeling this tired with any of my previous pregnancies.
Missing 9/1/10 @ 15 weeks, and 2/14/11 @ 13 weeks
I've been reading this thread and the roll call on my phone while putting my kids to bed at night. I find that that's the most convenient time for me to read e-mails and stuff but it's totally inconvenient to post from the phone. So I've been kind of absent but I've been keeping up with the thread.
I'm 9+4 today. I'll have my first ultrasound on Friday. I'm not really consciously nervous about it, but I also have no faith that there will be a heartbeat. I used to think that you could pretty much count on being pregnant as long as you hadn't started bleeding. I hadn't realized how common missed miscarriages were. Anyway, last time I had no heartbeat at 10 weeks and an 8 week baby so this ultrasound will be huge for me.
With my two successful pregnancies I was quite sick and puked a bunch of times. With my miscarriage pregnancy I felt pretty good until right around 8 weeks (which I later found out was when it died), when I got more nauseated and then got ravenously hungry, a symptom I had never before had. I thought for sure it was twins. Now I think my body was desperately trying to get it to grow.
This pregnancy has way more in common with the unsuccessful ones than it does with the good ones. I am only really getting reliably nauseated this week. I don't have the major hunger thing, but I do have the same feeling that if I don't eat right now I will need to puke. It's not a bottomless pit, though.
With the unsuccessful pregnancy we were on a trip to Italy right when the baby must have died. Of course I can't pinpoint the date exactly but if the u/s was accurate then it died on a day that DH and I had an enormous argument. I can no longer remember what it was about. Our biggest fights are always not so much about an issue as they are about DH being in the world's shittiest mood for days on end and me losing it with him. This time, I was 8 weeks on Christmas. We were in America visiting my parents for 16 days. This is enough to send DH over the edge. So on Christmas Eve we had another huge fight. It was at the point that he said that he was going to leave right then. He went downstairs (this was at about midnight and we were in my bedroom) and said he was going to the airport and would leave our passports behind. I was stuck in bed keeping my toddler asleep so I was left lying there wondering if he really would do it (it seemed unlikely) and what the hell I was going to tell my kids and parents when he was gone on Christmas morning. (He didn't leave and it was fine in the morning.)
Anyway, it was on the exact same day of the pregnancy. There's always been a part of me that wondered if that huge fight in Italy somehow caused my miscarriage. I know it probably didn't. People live through much worse experiences without losing babies. But I felt pretty crappy thinking about how this was again on the exact same day. Like maybe my body said that a baby shouldn't come into such a marriage. Of course then you'd expect me to miscarry, not for the baby to die and my body to cling onto it for another 7 weeks, keep on growing a placenta, etc.
Anyway, I'll be eager to see what happens on Friday. If it's all good then I will finally be able to truly acknowledge this pregnancy. I keep telling myself that if there's no baby, at least we'll be able to go on a summer holiday. Sounds heartless, I know, but at least it's a bit of a consolation.
Sarah, mother to Eloïse (5/2005), Lucas (3/2008) and Ilias (7/2011), and due with #4 (March 1, 2014)
I know you know that miscarriages aren't caused by things like that, but I just wanted to let you know that I can relate to this. DH and I had a HUGE fight a day before I started spotting with my ectopic pregnancy, and despite the fact that I know intellectually that there is no way in hell our fight caused two babies to get lodged inside my fallopian tube and implant there, I still have those feelings. We have fought since becoming pregnant and I have the same worries. I am a few weeks behind you, so I know that the wait is more bearable if you just let a part of you believe there's no hope. It's not heartless... it's mere self-preservation and I do it too.
Hi Sarah. I had a missed miscarriage in July 2010, so I know exactly where you are coming from. A mmc is such a different monster to deal with. The idea that your body keeps on being pregnant and growing even though the baby isn't has to be one of nature's cruelest tricks. I honestly don't think I will ever be 100% sure everything is fine with this baby until I hold him/her in my arms after he/she is born breathing and healthy (and then a whole new set of fears will kick in). However, every time I get to see/hear the baby's heartbeat, it does make me feel just a little better inside. We've now had two successful ultrasounds and I can honestly say that I am starting to bond with the baby for the first time. I wish you all the luck in the world and lot's of sticky vibes for your appointment on Friday. Please try to think positive and let us know how it goes.
AFM: I had my follow-up u/s this morning and got the hear the heartbeat as well as see it on the screen. It was music to my ears! The heart rate was a healthy 166. I am finally starting to feel relieved. One milestone down...two to go. I have an appointment scheduled in two weeks to check the heartbeat again, which will be 11w5d. That will cover my second milestone...the date that we discovered our babe had passed. I am cautiously starting to get very excited
I was bad. I had a horrible night at work on Tuesday. I got into a giant fight with a co-worker....screaming and rage all around. I had myself so scared that I hurt the baby (I know, I know), so I popped the ultrasound probe on myself to check (if you are bored, you can read the whole saga here). Mind you, that's how I found out my baby died with my last pregnancy. I had promised myself that I would never, ever check myself again. I couldn't help it, though. Anyway, baby looked great. Little heart was going a mile a minute and he/she was moving around in there. I feel a little better.
Jenn mama to MonkeySquishy& River(8wks)Wife to Mike See you at the Bridge, Abigael and McKenna
Just popping in because I finally figured out what PAL was (preggo brain). I had an early mc before my son was born, as well as WAY too many friends who have experienced loss. My own mc obviously plays over and over in my mind on a daily basis. The bigger thing for me at this point is that a close friend recently mc'd at 17 weeks, at the dinner table sitting next to me in the booth. It was a horrible experience for all of us there, and since it's in the "out of the woods" time, it has me even more cautious. Rationally, I know it is rare, but because I was so close to the situation, I can't help but be emotionally scarred. A mmc is my biggest fear.
Wife to a wonderful man since June '04, mommy to a beautiful 3 year old son and 1 year old daughter.
Erica, glad the second scan went well!
I am agree. I am so scared of a mmc. I did start bleeding with my first mc, then went to the doctor and found out the baby had stopped growing 2.5 weeks earlier. It does make it hard to bond or get excited and I just worry all the time. Less then 2 weeks until my ultrasound... I can not wait. I really want to get excited about this and talk to people about it. I agree with you though Erica, I wont be totally comfortable until the baby is in my arms.
Mommy to three girls DD 6, DD 3.5,DD 8/2011 & new babe 3/2013, 2 's 1/2008 and 8/2010
Welcome to the chat motray36! I'm sorry for your loss, as well as your friend's loss. I understand your fears and believe me, you are not alone at all.
Sarah: I wish you lots of peace as you wait out the next couple of weeks. I was on pins and needles waiting for my first u/s and then I was terrified to have it done once the day finally came. My blood pressure was even high that day and I ALWAYS have normal BP. Good luck, mama!
Hey ladies... I started a new JANUARY chat thread for us. Let's move the conversation over there and we'll start a new one each month to keep the size under control.