Anyone else tandem nursing? - Mothering Forums

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#1 of 16 Old 12-25-2010, 05:46 PM - Thread Starter
 
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I am... after I SWORE I wouldn't TTC until AFTER my daughter weaned... but she took too long, so here we are! She'll be three in February.

 

I'm still letting her nurse to sleep and a bit during the day, but she HAS to nurse nicely and I'm cutting WAY back on how often and how long I let her nurse. We've had no few crying spells over it, but no real TANTRUMS, and she's often accepting of a snuggle or some cow's milk instead. My nipples are just SO SORE!

 

I'm not sure if I want her to totally wean or if I want her to keep her just at a minimum until the baby's born. I just love nursing her so much, and she still depends on it a lot, for both food and comfort. It's breaking my heart to refuse her.

 

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#2 of 16 Old 12-26-2010, 11:49 AM
 
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Still nursing DS, although our second bundle is arriving much sooner in relation to his sibling.  DS is about 21 months now, and has had pretty much unlimited boob access since birth.  I actually don't mind the daytime nursing, but I'm SO exhausted by all the night nursing.  We're trying to gently work toward night-time weaning, but it's hard, and not going well at all.  I haven't slept for more than 2 consecutive hours since DS was born, and that exhausting schedule now being combined with early pregnancy isn't much fun.  We're just trying to take things one day/night at a time, tto be flexible, and to not make plans, because DS never seems to let us execute them anyway!


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#3 of 16 Old 12-27-2010, 12:37 PM
 
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DS is 20 months so of course he is still nursing. I've tandem nursed two other times but both the girls went on to wean shortly after the new baby arrived. DD1 weaned right before she was 4, about 2 months after DD2 came along, and DD2 was almost 3, that was about 6 months after DS was born.  I hate, hate during while pg but I put up with it. DS is so young that I want him to nurse for quite some time. 


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#4 of 16 Old 12-27-2010, 12:52 PM
 
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Nursing 20 month old ds still. He pretty much lost interest before I even knew I was pregnant. I don't know if I dipped in supply or there was a taste change or what. He still nurses about once every other day. I feel really bad about it. I wish he still could nurse as much as he did before I got pregnant. I really hope he stays interested in nursing until the baby is born, I would be more than happy to tandem nurse!


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#5 of 16 Old 12-28-2010, 08:24 PM
 
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DD is 3 and still nursing... Only before bedtime and first thing in the morning.  My nipples are so very sore its been tough and I am trying to decide if I should continue.  She does still so much need that intense bonding moment and its only twice a day but I am a little concerned about what will happen when the baby is here- will she try to nurse more often as she sees baby nursing?  So I haven't decided what to do- really I was hoping it would just taper off on its own after she turned 3, and though the frequency went way down with some encouragement, its still something she asks for daily. 


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#6 of 16 Old 12-29-2010, 07:37 AM
 
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well I'm nursing 3 1/2 and 1 1/2 year olds, and I'm prego. I'm hoping the oldest weans though, I'd rather not nurse 3 at a time! Lol

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#7 of 16 Old 01-19-2011, 03:32 PM
 
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I'm still nursing my YDS (19 months) and I feel really bad that he is down to nursing 3-4 times a day. I also have no supply any more greensad.gif


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#8 of 16 Old 01-19-2011, 04:06 PM
 
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Im still nursing my second son (13 months) and i am hoping he will wean before the baby comes. he sleeps ok at night, and lets daddy rock him back to sleep most of the time if he wakes up, so i guess he is night weaned. he has cut way back on daytime nursing so i think my supply is changing (doesnt help that i had the stomach flu twice in 4 days!)


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#9 of 16 Old 01-20-2011, 08:53 AM
 
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My DS is almost 12 months and I plan to nurse him for as long as my supply will last and to tandem nurse once the new baby comes. I don't want to wean him until he is at least 2. I'd like to do child led weaning.

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#10 of 16 Old 01-20-2011, 10:11 AM
 
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I like to think that I am still nursing DS(3 this weekend) but I don't know weather he thinks he is still nursing or not.  My milk supply is gone.  Not even a drop last time I tried.  The last time he nursed was now about a week ago and he was super disappointed.  I felt good and bad.  I have really been struggling with the fact that some of the stuff that has been going on in my body is transferring to him through the milk.  When he was nursing 10 or more times a day about 3 months ago we had to control strictly what we both ate and he would get rashes, diarrhea, itchy pain full bottom if we messed up even a little.  Since he cut down on the amount of milk he was getting we have been able to introduce almost all foods without problem.  The change happened almost within a matter of days.  It has been great that he has been able to eat more freely but I feel bad for pushing him to wean at all and sad that we don't have that connection so much any more.  I wasn't going to stop him nursing completely at all but then I got pregnant. 

I have been so sick and loosing weight like crazy and of course he wants to nurse first thing in the morning when I am either trying choke down a few crackers or throwing up.  I just didn't feel like I had the calories to be able to give to him, I was so week.  During the day when I had eaten I would let him nurse when he wanted to but as the milk decreased so did that want.  He does keep telling me that he will want to nurse when the baby gets here and the milk comes back, which I am okay with as long as it doesn't start making him sick.  I was hoping he would keep nursing now that I have started gaining weight back, etc... but I don't think he is interested since there is no milk, which I am very surprised at.  I thought he would always want to nurse no mater what.

I guess life is just a journey that never turns out the way we expect it to and we just have to flow with our children.  I have to get my head around the 2 children thing, balancing what is good for both of them.


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#11 of 16 Old 01-20-2011, 04:00 PM - Thread Starter
 
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My milk isn't completely dried up but it's getting there. My left side is MUCH more painful than my right, so I haven't been letting my daughter nurse on it for a few days and it's not even sore. Even a week or so ago I would have ended up engorged if I'd tried that.

 

~Rose

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#12 of 16 Old 01-20-2011, 04:13 PM
 
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Still nursing DS at 19 mo, but just barely.  I went back to work full time out of the home two months ago and since then, he's just been down to nursing to go to sleep, some night nursing, and first thing in the morning.  I was thinking I'd be tandem nursing for sure, because DS LOVES his nummies.  Now I'm not 100% sure if we'll make it.  He's been getting a little frustrated because I think my milk is drying up a little.  I've always had low supply issues, so he's used to really working for it, but we haven't had any real long, relaxing nursing sessions in a while...just little fly-by snacks here and there while he's awake.  I guess time will tell.

 

To those of you who are currently tandem nursing:  how do you handle a newborn and a toddler both wanting to night nurse while co-sleeping?  I'm so scared that if DS doesn't end up weaning that he'll roll over me onto the new baby during the night to nurse on the other side or something?


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#13 of 16 Old 01-26-2011, 09:17 AM
 
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I'll be tandem nursing.  DD was almost 3 when DS was born and she tandemed for a while.  I don't really remember when it stopped being real nursing and turned into ritual.  She still puts her mouth on my nipple for half a second most nights, but she hasn't actually gotten any milk in a long time.  She's 5.5 now.  DS will be 3 and a quarter when this baby is born.  He's a big boob man.  I'm not aware of my supply having changed.  When he pulls off I still have white milk clearly visible on my nipples.  I wonder if the fact that I've been nursing daily for 5.5 years has made my boobs more capable to continue making milk despite the hormonal changes?  Although when I was pregnant with DS, DD never complained that the milk had changed or dried up.  That's not to say that it didn't.  She just never commented and also didn't comment once it came back after he was born.  It seems that most other kids have some complaints.

 

DS did suddenly start sleeping vastly better about two weeks ago.  Maybe that has something to do with the milk changing or becoming less plentiful.  I have no idea, but I was at my wit's end with him waking up multiples times in the night to nurse, even at 2 and a half.
 

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Originally Posted by egmaranian View Post

 

To those of you who are currently tandem nursing:  how do you handle a newborn and a toddler both wanting to night nurse while co-sleeping?  I'm so scared that if DS doesn't end up weaning that he'll roll over me onto the new baby during the night to nurse on the other side or something?


Never fear.  I think it's like imagining co-sleeping when you're pregnant with your first.  Lots of people worry that they're going to roll over and kill their baby or whatever.  It just doesn't happen.  You do, of course, need to employ some safety measures.  My DD was sleeping through the night for the most part by the time DS was born.  I kept her between me and DH and baby DS was generally on the other side of me (at the edge of the bed), but was sometimes on the other side for the other boob in the crook of my arm.  The main rule is that you can't leave them in the bed alone together.  I think most people say that that applies until the baby is 12 or 18 months.  My DS slept downstairs with me on the couch until I went to bed at night until he was almost 1.  Then he started sleeping upstairs but DD was sleeping in her "bed," which is a couch pushed up to my side of the bed.  Her couch is about 6 inches lower than our bed so I felt that that was enough to stop her from rolling up onto the bed to squash him.

 

Here's hoping that your DS nightweans by the time the baby is born.  I think night nursing two would be pretty exhausting.


Sarah, mother to Eloïse (5/2005), Lucas (3/2008) and Ilias (7/2011), and due with #4 (March 1, 2014)

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#14 of 16 Old 01-26-2011, 09:43 AM
 
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Thanks.  This is exactly what I needed to hear.  Since DS is still nursing at night, he likes to roll over me to go from one boob to the other multiple times during the night.  I think if I can accomplish night weaning, it will be ok to have him in the bed with us once the new baby comes  The nights he sleeps more and nurses less, he stays pretty much in the same spot all night. 

 

Quote:
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Quote:
Originally Posted by egmaranian View Post

 

To those of you who are currently tandem nursing:  how do you handle a newborn and a toddler both wanting to night nurse while co-sleeping?  I'm so scared that if DS doesn't end up weaning that he'll roll over me onto the new baby during the night to nurse on the other side or something?


Never fear.  I think it's like imagining co-sleeping when you're pregnant with your first.  Lots of people worry that they're going to roll over and kill their baby or whatever.  It just doesn't happen.  You do, of course, need to employ some safety measures.  My DD was sleeping through the night for the most part by the time DS was born.  I kept her between me and DH and baby DS was generally on the other side of me (at the edge of the bed), but was sometimes on the other side for the other boob in the crook of my arm.  The main rule is that you can't leave them in the bed alone together.  I think most people say that that applies until the baby is 12 or 18 months.  My DS slept downstairs with me on the couch until I went to bed at night until he was almost 1.  Then he started sleeping upstairs but DD was sleeping in her "bed," which is a couch pushed up to my side of the bed.  Her couch is about 6 inches lower than our bed so I felt that that was enough to stop her from rolling up onto the bed to squash him.

 

Here's hoping that your DS nightweans by the time the baby is born.  I think night nursing two would be pretty exhausting.




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#15 of 16 Old 02-12-2011, 11:27 AM
 
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My youngest 21 month old still nurses before bed and 2-3 times during the night, some mornings, and sometimes after daycare. And my 3 yrs 4 month old DD is still nursing once a day before bedtime. I had to limit her a couple of weeks ago because it was getting to be too exhausting for me. There has been a definite decline in milk supply though. One day they went with out nursing all night and into the next evening and my boobs didn't feel anywhere near full.

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#16 of 16 Old 02-14-2011, 12:11 PM
 
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I am nursing my 19 month old quite a bit.  It's a bit annoying at times, but the comfort it bring her is so great I can't make myself quit : )  I have nursed several babies through pregnancies and gone on to tandem nurse them together.  It's kind of fun : )  Sure makes the new brother or sister a lot less jealous when the new baby makes his or her debut.

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