Is this your last baby? - Page 2 - Mothering Forums

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Old 02-14-2011, 01:22 PM
 
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This will be my 2nd (I also have a 3yo) and I feel very done.  I didn't feel this way when I was carrying my daughter, in a way it is a comfort for me to know this is my last pregnancy and to feel settled about it.  I will be 34 when this LO appears and it takes us awhile to get pregnant, so I wouldn't be comfortable trying again in my late 30's.  That and 2 feels like a very good number for us and our lifestyle.  I'm also ready to have a plan for when I'll get to rejoin my career, which has now been on hold for basically 3 years.

 


Semi-crunchy Momma to a 4 year old girl and a baby girl born in July of 2011.

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Old 02-14-2011, 04:23 PM
 
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Yes, yes, yes! #3 was our last! DH will be having he big V before this baby gets here. I was a month away from starting my own business when we found out, now it's gotten pushed back another 2 years. We are happy about the new baby now, but the beginning of this pregnancy was really rough...

Dawn, mama to D (3.06) & N (9.07) C (11.09) & Still-in-shock surprise due in Aug!
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Old 02-14-2011, 08:00 PM
 
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This is our last, I am done, and DH was done a while back! This is #4 for us. I HAD to have my 3 no doubt about it, the desire for them was quite strong. After #3, I could of settled, maybe. I had a feeling that I would always wish for one more, and my biggest fear was that in 5 years I would have to have another. As much as I love my children, they are hard work and I don't want to do this forever, my oldest is 8 and I want enjoy having older children, I want to put babies and toddlers past me. So here I am. The minute I got a + pg test I got that feeling, the feeling women talk about when they know they are officially done. I am not having any more children and am completely ok with it. Honestly, compared to before where I was "should we, should we not", it is a wonderful feeling. thumb.gif After this baby is born and around for a few months, I will happily consent to DH getting snipped. 


There is no way to happiness, happiness is the way.
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Old 02-14-2011, 10:10 PM
 
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This is number four for us and I don't anticipate it being our last, but it's hard to say for sure how life will turn out. 


Mommy to THREE sweet boys & ONE sweet girl + a newb due in February!  I need a nap. 
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Old 02-15-2011, 07:59 AM
 
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This is my 3rd pregnancy in 20 months, and will be baby #2. I'll have just turned 39 when this little one makes their grand entrance. I really hope we aren't done after this one. We married later in life and both DH and I had come to terms with never getting married or having children, so to have the blessing of each other, then the additional blessing of children is so amazing to us. DH will be 45 next week, so we are both old enough to have grandchildren, yet here we are just in the early stages of parenthood. I always wanted to have at least 8 children when I was growing up. I don't know if we'll have time for that before I get too old and hit the menopause, but we are certainly going to give it a good go. Children are such an incredible blessing, and we want as many blessings as we can get.

 

The first trimester is really tough for me. I get really exhausted and have all day nausea. I have to work hard at making sure I eat enough protein to stop myself from actually throwing up, and exercise seems impossible that first few months. But then I love being pregnant, so I just get through the first 3 months so that I can get to the enjoyable part. I love feeling a new life growing inside of me, it is such a miracle, and when I ponder that it really starts to blow my mind, that I can nurture and grow a whole human being inside my body. I also appreciate that motherhood forces me to grow as a person and also forces me to be less selfish. Even now when I'm still in the difficult stage (12w today) I just have to look at my 8mth old and I know it is so worth these first few months of discomfort.

 


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Old 02-15-2011, 08:24 AM
 
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Yeah, I think we are asking this question at exactly the wrong time, just at the end of the suckiest part of pregnancy (I am 12 w and feeling sooo exhausted and sic). Of course one never wants to feel like this again. This is #4 for us, and I loved my first two pregnancies. My 3rd was really hard, I was over 40, felt sick for 15 weeks, then baby was breech the whole rest of the time, with his head in my solar plexus, so I couldn't breathe and was always dizzy. I hope that even at 50 now I can enjoy some of the pregnancy,maybe the 2nd tri? This baby is "adopted" not related to us, from a donated embryo, from a young donor.

But it will be our last for absolutely sure because of our ages. I am ok with that, and grateful I do get another chance to go through it all again. I love children so much. My kids are more wonderful than I ever dreamed, when I was infertile and longing for them.

I am so glad that those of you who are wanting to do something permanent after this baby are going to have the man snipped. This is so much better than having the girl's tubes tied. Never do that. Women suffer for years or permanently with huge hormone problems after that surgery. It's so wrong.

mom to three sons and one new daughter born in August 2011
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Old 02-15-2011, 01:55 PM
 
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This is my first baby, but both DH and I have always pictured ourselves with only 1 child. Whenever I tell this to other people, they always say that I'll change my mind.... and maybe I will. So far I love being pregnant (I have always looked forward to this time in my life), but I can't imagine having more than 1 kid, at least for me.

 


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Old 02-15-2011, 01:59 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by cat13 View Post

This is my first baby, but both DH and I have always pictured ourselves with only 1 child. Whenever I tell this to other people, they always say that I'll change my mind.... and maybe I will. So far I love being pregnant (I have always looked forward to this time in my life), but I can't imagine having more than 1 kid, at least for me.

 


I keep thinking I want two or three, but when I think about redoing the first trimester with a child to take care of, I start to agree with you on that one ;)


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Mama to Charlie - born August 15th.

Waiting on number two, due March 17!

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Old 02-15-2011, 02:45 PM
 
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This is our last. It took a long time to convince DH for a third. It was just something in my gut that said, one more. Now that I am pregnant, there is not a doubt in my soul that this is the LAST ONE. no more.



It also took my DH a while to warm up to the idea of a 4th but I felt I really wanted one more. If I was going to have another I didn't want to wait around to do it, for many reasons. I also feel, now that Im pregnant, that I am completely happy with this being our last. I am really looking forward to being done with pregnancies and the negative parts of the nursing/newborn phase (don't get me wrong, I love love love little ones but it has had an affect on my marriage with the other babies--mainly lack of sex leading to a grumpy husband, me being tired and over-touched, etc :) I can't wait to get rid of my maternity clothes and eventually get my body back, be able to excercise and have some drinks if I want :) I am excited for the next phase of our family's life, being able to travel more easily and have fun with slightly older kids. All that being said, we are Catholic and practice Natural Family Planning (fertility awareness) as "birth control". I totally believe in it and know that if we are diligent it will be fine, but it does require restraint at certain times which is not my DHs strong suit..... I am fully prepared to be the "bedroom enforcer" from now on though!


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Old 02-18-2011, 05:43 PM
 
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I started this pregnancy pretty certain I would want to go for one more later to give us an even 4 kids, but I'm starting to feel pretty sure that 3 might be it.  The reality is that DH and I will both always be working full-time, and that is pretty hectic with the two we already have.  I'm starting to get nervous about how it's going to work with another LO in tow and I can't even BEGIN to imagine how we would ever manage 4.  As much as I love these ages and the idea of the newborn stage, it's also exciting to think that after August we will be inching our way out of these baby and toddler years.  

 

At any rate, if we would go for another, we will keep them close in age like we have been.  As crazy as things are being pregnant with a 3-year-old and a 1-year old, I can't imagine having gotten a break from the baby days only to be heading back into it.


Wife to DH (September '05) and mama to energy.gifEzri (August '07), superhero.gif Oz (April '09) and slingboy.gif Ezekiel (August '11).

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Old 02-19-2011, 12:11 PM
 
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Originally Posted by Fridaxsky View Post
At any rate, if we would go for another, we will keep them close in age like we have been.  As crazy as things are being pregnant with a 3-year-old and a 1-year old, I can't imagine having gotten a break from the baby days only to be heading back into it.


I haven't done it both ways yet, but my first two were about 6 years apart. It was nice that my son was in kindergarten already, so when we brought my daughter home from the hospital I had at least 6 hours of 1 on 1 time with her every weekday. She'll be about 20 months old when this baby is born.


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Old 02-20-2011, 03:58 PM
 
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We are done after this one.  It doesn't have anything to do with the rough parts of pregnancy for me, I just don't want more children after this.  Actually, had DH not wanted another so badly I am not sure I would be pregnant right now.  Don't mistake me, this pregnancy was planned and I am very happy for it, but I just do not have a desire to have more then two children.  

 

I actually wanted DH to get a V while I was pregnant but he feels more comfortable waiting until after the baby is born.  


Jenna in love with my DH Jon, loving our 2.5 year old, Caroline Tulip, and expecting another little one in August!
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Old 02-21-2011, 06:29 AM
 
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Originally Posted by Beckily View Post

I keep thinking I want two or three, but when I think about redoing the first trimester with a child to take care of, I start to agree with you on that one ;)

It's been tough!  A lot tougher than I imagined.  I'm not so secretly glad DD is 2.5 so that she's sorta kinda sometimes able to help me out.  I mean, I know many of you guys and others have kids a year apart or so, and I know it's possible.  But I also really think that when it comes to child spacing you have to look at yourself and what you can handle, and evaluate based on that.  I know myself, and I know I'd be certifiable with two under two or something like that!!



Quote:
Originally Posted by Fridaxsky View Post
  As crazy as things are being pregnant with a 3-year-old and a 1-year old, I can't imagine having gotten a break from the baby days only to be heading back into it.

 

I can seriously see both sides, which makes it tough for me!  I think it'd be nice to have a few years break from babies, and then jump back into it with more wisdom and renewed energy.  

But I can also see DH and I looking at each other when our kids are middle school age, and then looking at brochures for travel and saying,"....Nahhhhh!" LOL!!
 

More and more as this pregnancy continues, I think I'm done.  It's a strange, comforting, satisfying feeling.  But, I guess it's open to change!


Carrie SAHM to Nora Caitlyn (5) and Finnley Dax (2) homebirthing, breastfeeding, babywearing, intactivist, doula mama!         
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Old 02-21-2011, 09:36 AM
 
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I've done the break (semi) and then also jumped back in quickly. It is a toss up to what I prefer. I really, really enjoyed DD1 being almost 4 when DD2 was born. DD2 ended up getting seriously ill as a newborn and for 6 months our lives were consumed by basically keeping her alive. DD1 was old enough that I was and did ignore her while dealing with DD2 during that time. If I wanted only two then that would be of been wonderful. I got calculating out the years if I were to have wider spacings and realized that I didn't want to do this forever! I had much mess stress with a baby and an older child, well I would of if DD2 had been well anyway. I don't even want to think about the nightmare it would of been dealing with all the hospital stays if I had a very young child as well. 

 

So DD2 and DS ended up exactly 2y and 6m apart and it was harder. This baby and DS will be 2y 3m apart, and I am dreading it, DS is also delayed so he seems younger then he is. The one nice thing if all my children were younger together is that we would have minimal places to go, I can see the beauty is having a few crazy years with multiple small children and then they are older together. My oldest will be 8.5 when this babe is born, doing the whole school thing with a newborn in tow is rough. I can't ever volunteer, I miss out on so much because I can never attend anything. There is no bus service so twice a day, the school trip is 20 minutes each way, not fun to be doing with a brand new baby. Then with older kids you have all the extra stuff, snowboarding , gymnastics, tapping, on and on. My small kids spent half their life in a waiting room and the other half driving someplace. 

 

Someday I invision being able to help out and actually watch DD1 do white water kayaking for example but that day is many years away, for now I am just wrangling small children and maybe getting to hear about it later. 


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Old 02-21-2011, 01:02 PM
 
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I needed a nice long break from baby things. When DD was 2, 3, and even 4 I couldn't go near the baby section of a store because it just made me feel overwhelmed and tired thinking about those days! Now that it's so far behind me, I miss it! I can't wait to have baby stuff all over the house again, I've gotten a couple years of sleep, and I'm ready to tackle that challenging first year again with renewed energy.

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Old 02-22-2011, 04:15 PM
 
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There's a good chance this will be our last baby. I might get my tubes tied while they're in their getting the baby out. They asked last time, and I definitely knew that I wanted more children then. But, this time I think that four will be it. We already have 3 girls, and if #4 is a girl, I don't see myself wanting to try for a boy.

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Old 02-23-2011, 12:17 PM
 
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This is baby #2 for us and this will definitely be our last baby. DH would have been fine only having one, but I come from a large family and I couldn't imagine not growing up without at least 1 sibling, so I was set on having two. We actually talked about this and agreed to it before I would say "yes" when he proposed, because I wanted to make sure we wouldn't have to fight about it later.

They will be exactly 2 years apart, which I think will be nice for them growing up.  It would have been nice to have waited a little longer before getting pregnant again (I miss having coffee and alcohol!), but this way we get all the sleep deprived nights and diapering over in one big chunk, rather than spreading it out over so many years.

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