I am totally freaking out about having twins. I have a toddler and I just can't fathom how I am going to manage! Anyone else have twins or having twins? I need some support and words of wisdom:)
Wife to my loving husband, James. Mother to a beautiful daughter, Jules (8/6/08). Expecting twin girls September 19th, Jade and Jemma.
wow! congrats!!! i don't blame you for feeling overwhelmed, but i'm sure all will fall into place. *hugs*
Robyn - In with Tyson, Gothy Mama to Jasmyn (March 12 2003), Grayson (August 2 2005), my Aurora Hope (m/c Nov 10 2010), and Sydney Rayne (September 17 2011) x3
Congratulations! My sisters are identical twins, and it's such a special thing for the family. I was five when they were born. I can totally see how news like this would be a shock to the system, though! This is obviously not based on my own experiences, but from what I have put together since those days, discussion with my mom, etc, some keys to survival seems to be:
La Leche League and Mothers of Multiples for breastfeeding support. I think this was also nice for me, to play with the siblings at the meetings.
Feeding the freezer in preparation for the months after birth (a chest freezer is so awesome).
Accepting and directing people's vague offers of support: "Let me know if I can do anything!" "Well, as a matter of fact, I would LOVE it if you could take Toddler to the park for a while one afternoon this week!" etc. (my mother admits she was really bad at this).
takethemameal.org (for someone else to send out to your friends/family/church group). It works really smoothly, in my experience.
Decluttering and simplifying in the household, before the babies arrive, to keep pickup and mess to a minimum. My mom rotated toys in and out of metal garbage cans in the shed. We didn't have very many clothes at any given time. Just bottom sheets and machine-wash comforters on the beds, etc.
I love my sisters so much, I can't imagine having singleton siblings! They were so cute as babies, touching each other's faces, learning to crawl together, cuddling in their bed at night. So sweet. My mother was overwhelmed a lot, it's true, but I think that had a lot to do with her lack of support in her life generally. It's hard to say what was the twins and what was other factors. As a mother of two, I've been overwhelmed a lot too, and I'm sure that'll increase as I add a third! Anyway, that's my second-hand thinking on the subject. One thing I know for sure is that your older child is going to be FINE. Her young age means that within a few months or a year, it will feel to her that the babies have always been there, just a natural part of her world. You are giving her such a gift, although she doesn't know it yet....
My SIL has twin boys who just turned 2 and her older son is about to be 6, I know that some days she feels like she is going to lose her mind, but what parent doesn't, right? Its a crazy/amazing/unique experience to have multiples, I know its daunting but all I can say is have faith in yourself and take support from those around you, congratulations!
Mama to M. born 09/2011
Keep calm & carry on
Congrats!! I can sort of understand how you feel, a friend from my first prenatal class just had twins and just thinking of being in her place terrifies me! It sounds like she's doing amazing though, she has tons of support. So not knowing anything about twins myself that's the only advice I can give, accept help and lots of it!!
North Idaho rural living mama to: 23 yo DD, 16 yo DS, 8 yo DS, 6 yo DS, 4 yr old DS, 2 yo DD, and 1 yo DS. And someone new coming this Christmas!
CONGRATS! My aunt had twins, and they came early and were very small. Fortunately they were healthy and able to go home within a week. Still, the smaller of the two had a lot of trouble with gas and eating - poor little thing! The bigger baby was better, but he just wanted to be held all the time and would scream in his crib.
Anyway, the whole extended family stepped in. We recognized that they needed at least two people with the babies whenever possible for the first couple of months. We all took turns going over and just holding a baby, or washing the dishes, cooking, or whatever.
Don't be afraid to ask for and accept help. I'm sure you've offered your help to a new mom at some point - remember how you felt. You were serious, right? You weren't just offering "to be nice." Others feel the same way and will be happy to spend a few hours with you and your adorable brood.
Congratulations and good luck =] if u could message me back on here that would be Wonderful! how far along were you for when you found out that your having twins? because im alot bigger then most that im aware of, im only 5 months, and EVERYONE seems to think im having twins. twins run in my family and on my boyfriends side, so im a bit anxious to find out. so far theres only one baby