So I just got home from an OB visit, and I'm kind of annoyed! For a bit of background, my ds was 8 lb 12 oz when he was born... at 36 w 2 d. I'm somewhat overweight, he was a big baby. I get it, really I do, OB. I took the glucose tolerance test around 26 weeks last time, and it was totally normal. Despite that, because ds was LGA, they wanted me to take an early glucose test this time, which I did last visit (18 weeks). Everything was normal. I knew from my first visit with them that they were going to want me to take *another* one later on, again, just because ds was big. Ok fine, whatever. Anyway, today was the first visit I've had since I took the test last time, and then I find out that at my very next checkup I have to do it again (which would be the same point in the pg that I took it last time, when it was normal). I guess I knew it was coming, but I'm finding myself quite irritated with the whole situation.
There are 2 OBs at this practice, along with 2 NPs. Each time I see someone new, they bring it up. And each time, I remind them I did have the glucose test last time, and yes it was normal, and for the love of god, the babies in my family are all just huge, and normal and healthy. Today was the first time I'd even met (who I guess was) the 2nd OB, and she basically launched into the room, didn't introduce herself at all, and pretty much the first thing she did was squawk "8 pounds 12 ounces at 36 weeks!! Wow!! Is this him?! [refers to ds sitting in dh's lap] And no diabetes?!" Like I'm a celebrity or something. NO! FOR THE LAST TIME, NO FLIPPIN DIABETES! Doesn't it say that in the chart you apparently just read? I mean she was very friendly and didn't try to make it a huge issue or try to scare me or anything, which I appreciate. I just am exasperated with health professionals' reactions to having a big baby. With my ds, I went with a nurse midwife practice that's attached to one of the local hospitals. For whatever reason (maybe I was measuring big?) they wanted to do an ultrasound around 34 weeks to check size. According to the ultrasound he was LGA, so they actually referred me to their backup ob to discuss my options, including early induction and elective c-section. what?!? really?! I thought this was a midwife practice? If he'd gone all the way to 40 weeks he probably would have been pushing 11 lbs-- not unheard of. They act like no one's ever birthed a big baby before. The entirety of active labor including ~40 minutes of pushing was less than 5 hours with ds. I just feel like saying, "don't worry, I've got this!"
I was complaining to my mom about this after the appt, and she reminded me that they're just trying to make sure everything is normal, and that most people don't have giant babies like we do unless they are having issues with diabetes. I guess maybe that's true, I don't really know. That doesn't mean I'm not annoyed as hell with them! Blah, I just wish I could afford a homebirth, and then maybe I wouldn't have to deal with everyone acting as though I could be going into a diabetic coma at any second, despite having no evidence whatsoever that there are now or have ever been any issues with my blood sugar. Alright, done ranting:)
Wow. I'm sorry you've got to deal with this. That really sucks. Babies in my family were of a pretty normal size. I was 7lbs 13oz or somewhere there abouts. My younger sister was a full pound more than me. Size is something I really think about because my husband was a few ounces shy of 10 lbs. His older sister was less and his younger brother was less (but my MIL attributes that to a very strict diet her OB put her on because of DH birth weight, not to mention she was told, never gain more than 20 lbs - period). Some practitioners are still stuck in that mentality.
Just the other day DH was talking with MIL and he mentioned how big I was (I appear about as big as two other first time expectant mamas a full 10 weeks ahead of me). She said to check for edema and that "how big she [carried]" was the only hint that she had pre-e. This woman had every major complication in the book from what I can figure: Pre-eclampsia, gestational diabetes, and Rh incompatibility. She had miserable pregnancies, but she bore 3 children (and miscarried 1). I mention all that to really say: It sucks when people want to presume that you have complications and that you will run into serious issues when it's not the case. My mom felt great during her pregnancies and aside from morning sickness and GERD I have too.
Have you considered finding a new practice?
Two wonderful boys born Aug 2009 and Sept 2011, and #3 due April 2015! I'm also a CLC and postpartum doula.
Sorry you're dealing with this! I am as well this time around. I'm not overweight by any means but my babies (3) have all been well over 9 lbs and for some reason the OB I'm seeing while I wait for insurance issues to be resolved so I can see a home birth midwife is totally freaking out about how big my babies were in the past. Every appointment we go over the same things. "So, really, no gestational diabetes with any of them? Really? Are you sure? What were your results like?" I get these questions EVERY SINGLE TIME and it's starting to irritate me. I don't get why he thinks it's so impossible.
Thanks for commiserating:) It really does get old to have to deal with their crazy attitudes every time. At least they're otherwise nice, I guess. And yes, I have considered finding a new practice... There's another practice in town that I wanted to go with, but they had quite a long wait (like 5 weeks or more) when I was trying to set up my first appointment. I waited a bit too late to set it up, I guess, and wanted to be seen before then. But there is still the option to transfer. They have a midwife on staff who I guess sometimes is able to attend births, and that seems like a good enough reason to transfer. I'm a little hesitant, because they actually have an on-call pool with the office I'm at. So basically, there are a total of 4 docs between the practices, and they have an arrangement where they each are only on call one weekend a month, covering each others' patients on those weekends. I'd feel weird if I ended up going into labor on a weekend covered by one of the docs I bailed on. :) Anyway, I'm still going to consider it, though I can't entirely expect them to have a much different attitude.
Sorry you have to have this PITA! ;-) I have no advice but just wanted to chime in b/c I've been thinking about the whole ridiculous GD test too. It's like, "here drink this awful thing and we'll see what happens to you. And if we don't like the results, here's our instructions: Don't ever do anything like THAT again! Eat healthfully instead."
I was at HB midwife at this point in my pg last time so I avoided the whole issue. This time, I'm trying to get in w/ midwife but there are some issues, so I"m still seeing OB. They gave me the lab slip this week to get the test done before my next checkup. I'm thinking I just skip it and show up and say, yeah I don't think I need this.
Mama to two sweet girls!
I'm so sorry you are going through this! How awful. This is my first and I feel so lucky that I'm avoiding all of this with my HB-MW.
Babies have always been big in my family too... and I can't seem to avoid people already commenting on how big I am and how big they think the baby will be. Some stranger on the train even asked me the other day, "Did they tell you how big he's going to be?" I said no and laughed, but I was thinking... they actually DO that?! How weird...
Well, despite the fact that we can't really afford it out of pocket, I had a conversation with a local mom yesterday that led me to pursue a homebirth midwife again. We're going to look into just taking out a small loan, because I've tried to convince myself that it doesn't really matter and that I'll know better this time and will be better able to stand up for myself in the hospital, etc etc... But the truth is I'm already feeling worn out by just trying to have a normal pregnancy and birth experience this time, and I want to be able to focus on growing and then birthing a baby when the time comes, not constantly having to refuse this or insist on that and have things be a battle the whole time. It takes a lot of energy and stress for me to stand up for myself to "experts" and I want to avoid that if I can. Being a little tighter every month until it's paid off is ultimately going to be very worth it to get the experience I really want.
So.... if we can work out the money thing, I'm setting up a consultation with a midwife I was referred to. Midwives have to be pretty underground here in GA due to the legal climate, so I hadn't even heard of this lady. It's kind of cool though because the midwife I would have gone to had I started seeing her earlier is now booked up around my due date, so she gave me this other lady's number. Turns out the new lady is much closer to me and charges a full thousand dollars less than the first one. So, assuming she isn't a flake and has the answers I'm looking to hear, I may get my homebirth yet:) What a relief that would be!
Maybe you will be lucky. I was surprised to find out our HB MW had a billing service and could get some portion from my insurance (as long as you don't have HMO). Also, ours will let you pay on installments. My friend took a whole year to pay off her birth! :-)
Mama to two sweet girls!
I've talked to her about it briefly already, and she will let you pay in installments. She said she likes to be paid in full by 36 weeks, but she would be willing to go "1 maaaaybe 2 months" past the birth with payments if it meant the difference between being able to do it or not. The only problem is, money is pretty tight right now and seeing as how it's relatively late in my pregnancy to be starting care with her, we wouldn't really be able to come up with that totally out of pocket. DH is going by the bank today after work to see about a small personal loan, which we would use to consolidate a couple other small debts (which we'd talked about doing anyway) and then add in a bit more for the hb cost. We'd probably be able to pay most of it off with our next tax return, so it would be a few months of tighter expenses, but it would be doable. I'm hoping it works out!
Oh, yay!! Well, good luck with the money end of things... and just in case that doesn't pan out, have you looked into getting a doula for the hospital birth experience? That might be a good medium... letting someone else fight your battles for you and still not breaking the bank. Just a thought. I hope you get the birth you want. FXd!!
Hooray! The money issue has been worked out, and we won't be paying any more per month in bills than we already do, so, bonus:) I've got a consultation set up with the midwife on Monday, and things are looking up. I'm excited! Thanks mamas!
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