Gender...who's finding out? - Mothering Forums

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#1 of 52 Old 02-15-2011, 11:43 AM - Thread Starter
 
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My husband and I, for humour sake, want to try this.

We really do want to find out with this one though-through ultrasound if possible. After two boys, I feel like I need to be prepared if it's going to be a girl!

If the ultra sound isn't obvious enough then it will just have to be a surprise-I opt out of the amnio.

 

Who's going to try to find out?


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#2 of 52 Old 02-15-2011, 11:50 AM
 
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First, we did the intelligender last time it said girl and we ended up with a boy! Just wanted to put that out there! We will be getting an ultrasound to find out for sure! I am not at all patient enough not to! Then I get all summer to go to rummage sales and pick stuff up!


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#3 of 52 Old 02-15-2011, 11:55 AM
 
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I have heard something about Drano working like those tests..??

 

We will find out. We also have two boys would 'need' to know if it's a girl.


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#4 of 52 Old 02-15-2011, 12:03 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Haha, yes, the intelligender is more going to be for fun-so I won't read into too much. I thought it might be a fun little "science" experiment for the kids to witness. (not the peeing part...) just waiting for the colour to change.lol

 

I live across the street from a gorgeous children's consignment shop that often has really awesome stuff..i'll want to be buying stuff as I see it! MUST FIND OUT.lol


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#5 of 52 Old 02-15-2011, 12:04 PM
 
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I saw that test last week when I was picking up preggo test and I am curious about it.  Part of me wants to be surprised but I think I will probably find out if possible (my first two kept their legs closed) so I know which hand me downs to get out and because I am doing cloth this time and would love to get some cute gender specific covers :)


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#6 of 52 Old 02-15-2011, 12:14 PM
 
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I have three girls and will NOT be finding out what this one is until s/he comes out. I have never found out with any of them, though I have had an ultrasound each pregnancy. It's really not an emergency to not "be ready". There's plenty of neutral baby clothes out there, plus for me, we have family who always bring over clothes when a new baby is born(tradition) so I am not worried. If it's a boy...we'll need to do a bit more shopping for clothes, but if it's a girl we are set for 2+ years!


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#7 of 52 Old 02-15-2011, 12:15 PM
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I'm planning to find out.

 

I didn't with DS. Basically, I was so stressed about having a (highly medicalized) pregnancy that it was difficult to focus on having a baby. This time I want to focus on the baby as much as possible, and finding out the sex (if possible) will be part of that.


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#8 of 52 Old 02-15-2011, 12:26 PM
 
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I would like to find out this time, with DD we didnt and that was great fun but I want to be prepared for another girl or a boy. A boy would mean more shopping, haha.


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#9 of 52 Old 02-15-2011, 12:27 PM
 
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DH really wants to. I would prefer not to. We'll probably find out. It'll be dh's reward for putting up with me. LOL!


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#10 of 52 Old 02-15-2011, 12:53 PM - Thread Starter
 
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lol Steph!!

 

Dh said he really didn't care if we found out, but at the same time he said he'd like to be prepared for a girl.lol I'd kind of like to know whether or not we need girl names or boy names...since dh and I have a hard time finding girl names that we both like a lot, it would be a pity to go hum and haw over a bunch of girl names, FINALLY decide on one, and then find out we don't need it!


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#11 of 52 Old 02-15-2011, 01:00 PM
 
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We did not find out with our first two, and it was oh-so-fun to be surprised at the birth. 

 

This time, however, I am finding myself having a hard time wrapping my head around the idea of another baby, so I think that I might find out, just to get that early connection.  However, DH absolutely doesn't want to find out before the birth, so it will just be my little secret with  myself.  Sounds kind of fun and sneaky :)


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#12 of 52 Old 02-15-2011, 01:19 PM
 
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We will definitely find out! I'm too much of a preparer not to!

I did the Chinese Gender Prediction chart and it said boy for my DS and it's predicting a girl this time! Who knows? It was also right for my friends's two boys.

The Mayan Predictor is this: if the month you conceived and your age are both even or both odd, it's a boy. If they are one odd and one even, it's a girl! It was right again for my DS and is predicting a girl this time, too.

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#13 of 52 Old 02-15-2011, 01:21 PM
 
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We will find out. We did with DD, I'm far too impatient to wait plus I like to shop lol.


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#14 of 52 Old 02-15-2011, 01:37 PM
 
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We found out with DS.  We like knowing ahead of time, but we'll take what we can get with the ultrasound since we also opt out of amnio.


Loving wife to a wonderful and Godly man, hug.gif  and SAHM to two beautiful boys, DS1, natural hospital birth (2/2010) and DS2, beautiful homebirth (10/2011) cd.gifnursex2.gif

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#15 of 52 Old 02-15-2011, 01:43 PM
 
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I can't wait to find out! I'm not purchasing the Intelligender test though, I haven't heard very good things about it. One lady here on MDC posted about it and said that it basically measures the pH in your urine. If it's low, it will give you a girl result, if it's high a boy. I don't know if that's true or not, but since we have a bunch of little test strips for our kiddie pool, I decided to give it a shot. Low pH, so girl for me winky.gif.

I've also heard of the Draino test, but have no idea how that works.


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#16 of 52 Old 02-15-2011, 01:58 PM
 
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We haven't found out with any of our kids except the first 2.   I'm torn about it this time, though.  On the one hand I love the surprise when the baby is born on the other hand I think I would like to know....

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#17 of 52 Old 02-15-2011, 02:23 PM
 
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we found out with our first 2...we have one of each....so we are not planning to find out this time ;)


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#18 of 52 Old 02-15-2011, 03:08 PM
 
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We found out the first time and I was happy we did. However I want to wait this time.


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#19 of 52 Old 02-15-2011, 03:57 PM
 
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I want to be surprised, but DH would definitely like to know.  The way I was thinking about it, it is pretty much the biggest and coolest surprise there is, and I believe God designed it to be a surprise.  I'm awful about keeping secrets and surprises, so I know it will be total torture though!

 

Also, I think it could be a good idea for us to have lots of gender neutral clothes/ things/ expectations.  We live in a very gendered society already, and the kid will have plenty of time for us to dress it in pink or blue, or subtly impose our expectations of what girls vs. boys do.  I partially want a girl especially because girl baby clothes are just so darn cute, but I figure I can wait until I meet it before I start coordinating cute little pink outfits!  

 

I also don't plan on getting any ultrasounds, so that makes it a little easier to keep the gender a surprise.  If I had one, I don't think I'd have the self control to NOT find out the gender!  


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#20 of 52 Old 02-15-2011, 05:22 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Amy May View Post

I want to be surprised, but DH would definitely like to know.  The way I was thinking about it, it is pretty much the biggest and coolest surprise there is, and I believe God designed it to be a surprise.  I'm awful about keeping secrets and surprises, so I know it will be total torture though!

 

Also, I think it could be a good idea for us to have lots of gender neutral clothes/ things/ expectations.  We live in a very gendered society already, and the kid will have plenty of time for us to dress it in pink or blue, or subtly impose our expectations of what girls vs. boys do.  I partially want a girl especially because girl baby clothes are just so darn cute, but I figure I can wait until I meet it before I start coordinating cute little pink outfits!  

 

I also don't plan on getting any ultrasounds, so that makes it a little easier to keep the gender a surprise.  If I had one, I don't think I'd have the self control to NOT find out the gender!  



I'm not sure if I even have the option of opting out of an ultra sound here. (ontario.) I don't think they'd drag me kicking and screaming, but i'm pretty sure they'd give me a hard time.

Is there a reason you opt out? Please tell me there aren't risks I don't know about...i'm already paranoid about everything!


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#21 of 52 Old 02-15-2011, 05:27 PM
 
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We will absolutely be finding out! I'm not a big fan of surprises in any respect, it's all I can do to wait until 20 weeks to find out!


 partners.gif Married to an awesome dh for 5 years. energy.gifSweetpea, our honeymoon baby! (06/07), biggrinbounce.gif Little man (04/09), and rolleyes.gif our newest little guy (10/11).
 

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#22 of 52 Old 02-15-2011, 05:53 PM
 
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I'm so torn this time!  We didn't find out last time and I loved that.  But I feel really pulled to find out this time.  I don't know why.  I think the first time it was "enough" just to be pregnant b/c it took us a while and I had the baby fever BAD.  This time, I'm excited, but it's different than not having any child at all, you know???


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#23 of 52 Old 02-15-2011, 06:01 PM
 
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Basically, the WHO says that it is not clear whether ultrasounds are beneficial to the mother or fetus in terms of pregnancy, and the potential for delayed effects has been virtually ignored, so while it is believed that there aren't serious risks, that can't be proven.  There is no proof that ultrasounds are either safe or unsafe, however, there are theoretical risks that should be considered.  The AMA and ACOG all recommend agains unnecessary ultrasound exposure (what constitutes necessary is also very subjective).  Here are a couple of articles.

 

I think all women should definitely make an informed decision, and if they chose to have 1 or 20 ultrasounds, hopefully they made that decision feeling like they had information to make it, rather than just because they were told they should!

 

www.unhinderedliving.com/pultra.html

 

www.midwiferytoday.com/articles/ultrasoundrogers.asp

 

P.S.  There is no right or wrong decision about a family's decision to get ultrasounds, genetic testing, or anything- I want all the mamma-to-be's here to feel fully supported- I hope this comes across this way!


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#24 of 52 Old 02-15-2011, 06:40 PM
 
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Thank you for your post Amy May!  Learning about US's is what made me decide to only have 1 US my last pregnancy & this pregnancy.  I had 3 with my son (1 to check EDD bc of unsure dates, 1 anatomy scan, & 1 unidentified bleeding at 37wks) but I just had the one with my daughter and will only have 1 this time- to check the placement of the placenta since that is my only concern with me being a VBAC momma :)


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#25 of 52 Old 02-15-2011, 06:58 PM
 
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We always said we wouldn't find out but with ds before my first u/s dh looked at me & said "are you SURE you don't want to find out" which was exactly what I wanted to ask him. So we did find out. And it was really nice to be able to call ds by name from so early on. Plus we never had a girl's name we could agree on & I did really want a girl so by finding out ahead of time I avoided any potential disappointment at the birth (a friend of mine had this & I think it really affected her bonding with her ds).

 

We will find out again this time if lo cooperates. We have no idea for names so only have to discuss one would be really helpful. Otherwise I don't really care either way - we want more so if this one isn't a girl I will celebrate that I'll have 2 little boys close in age to play together.


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#26 of 52 Old 02-15-2011, 07:28 PM
 
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I will be finding out. I plan on doing the IntelliGender test just for fun to see what it says.

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#27 of 52 Old 02-15-2011, 08:25 PM
 
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I'd prefer to find out, just because it would be nice to prepare for a specific baby and not a gender-neutral someone. I'd also like to focus on names for the correct gender and not worry about the other one if I don't have to. However.... my husband didn't want to know last time, and I'd guess he will feel the same now.

 

It's not likely that I'll have an ultrasound unless there's a problem, though. I'm hoping to have the baby at a birth center with a midwife, and they don't do routine ultrasounds. I guess that decided it for me!

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#28 of 52 Old 02-15-2011, 08:59 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Amy, after your first comment I started doing a little research. I can't believe I've never looked this up before...I research everything from vaccines to my kid's toothpaste and shampoo. I don't know how this one slipped out of my conspiracy theory.lol

You've definitely given me some good links, and some questions to ask my midwife.

 

I showed my husband these when he got home from work, (he's a kinesiologist) and he had never heard of any of this-the kicker is that HE opperates an ultrasound machine quite a bit. Interesting...


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#29 of 52 Old 02-15-2011, 09:52 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by corrabelle View Post

I'm not sure if I even have the option of opting out of an ultra sound here. (ontario.) I don't think they'd drag me kicking and screaming, but i'm pretty sure they'd give me a hard time.

 

It depends on how you define, "a hard time," but I suspect it's less likely than you think. Routine u/s have not been shown to be helpful in normal, healthy pregnancies (though, to a certain extent, that could be a function of the statistics and sample sizes) and neither the SOGC nor the AOM have guidelines requiring them. (They do have guidelines that women should be offered them.)

 

From a scientific perspective, I will say that if there are additional risks of u/s, they are likely to be quite small, but for an uncomplicated pregnancy, there is no good evidence to suggest that an u/s is necessary, so it's a perfectly reasonable choice to decline if that is what you want to do. Your care providers might be surprised, but they shouldn't give you a hard time about saying no thanks.


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#30 of 52 Old 02-15-2011, 09:56 PM
 
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I can't start picking names until I find out!!! 

 

We all really want this one to be a girl - and if it's not, I want to have plenty of time to get used to the idea, and especially prepare my daughter, who so desperately wants a sister.  I also got rid of all my baby clothing last time we moved, and I'm not in love with gender-neutral clothing.  I'd like to be prepared with the right things on hand.  Oh, I know it's possible to get the wrong gender even after an ultrasound, but I'd deal with that when it came. 

 

Maybe if I have a 5th baby someday, I'll let that one be a surprise.  Not ready for a surprise this time, though-- the surprise was getting pregnant at all.  ;)


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