Gender Survey Thread - Mothering Forums

Forum Jump: 
Reply
 
Thread Tools
#1 of 63 Old 04-20-2011, 06:07 AM - Thread Starter
 
Gabesgrrrl's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2004
Location: Canada
Posts: 333
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)

Update!!!: I can't believe I forgot to post on my own thread! lol

 

It's a GIRL~ We're all over the moon!

 

 

 

Hi Ladies! In 1 week and 5 days, I'll be having a sono-and hope to find out not only that the babe is healthy, but also little bean's "flavor"! I'm having a hard time getting a "reading" on which gender this baby is. I think it might be because for my last baby, I really have a hope that it's a girl. I think it's clouding my intuition a bit, because I do think it might actually BE a girl, but then I start to think it's only because that's what I'm hoping for!!! LOL!

 

It got me thinking: Some of us already know what we're having--and I'd love to do a really informal survey:

 

1) Do you know what gender you're having?

 

2) If no, what gender to you THINK you're having? (Be sure to come back and update!)

 

3) If yes, which gender?

 

4) Did you have a feeling you were having this gender?

 

5) What were your pregnancy symptoms or other things that led you to this feeling?

 

Can't wait to read your answers!

 

Marcie


Mother of reading.gif, REPlaySkateboard04HL.gifjammin.gif and babyf.gifborn Oct. 5th after angel.gif  angel.gif angel.gif. Social Media Manager and writer by day, Bloomin' Belly Soap maker by night.

Gabesgrrrl is offline  
#2 of 63 Old 04-20-2011, 09:36 AM
 
JoyfulWife's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2011
Posts: 69
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)

1) Do you know what gender you're having? Not yet, we find out May 10th!

 

2) If no, what gender to you THINK you're having? Well I'm hoping for a girl but we'll see.

 

3) If yes, which gender?

 

4) Did you have a feeling you were having this gender? No! Not at all this time. Like I said, hoping for a girl but really I have no clue.

 

5) What were your pregnancy symptoms or other things that led you to this feeling? I have a boy and a girl already and both of their pregnancies were so different I thought for sure I would know what this one was. However, I have hyperemesis so the only thing I feel is sick. It's nothing like either of my other pregnancies.

 

I can't wait to find out, I hate surprises and have had a hard time waiting this long! ;)

Gabesgrrrl likes this.

 partners.gif Married to an awesome dh for 5 years. energy.gifSweetpea, our honeymoon baby! (06/07), biggrinbounce.gif Little man (04/09), and rolleyes.gif our newest little guy (10/11).
 

JoyfulWife is offline  
#3 of 63 Old 04-20-2011, 09:44 AM
 
AKChix0r's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: Alaska
Posts: 373
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
1) Nope, not until the end of May (20 weeks)
2) I think it is a girl, which sucks, but as long as she's healthy, blah blah blah...
3) N/A
4) N/A
5) only dream I have had about the baby, it was a girl. Mother in-law did the infamous pencil test (that has been 100% accurate for everyone she has done it to) and my results were two kids, girl first, boy second. Chinese gender chart thing (90% accurate, from what I've heard) said girl. Getting SERIOUSLY fugly (girls take away beauty), and a whole myriad of other old wives tales. We'll see. Both hubs and I would prefer a boy.
Gabesgrrrl likes this.

Alaskan Wife and Mama to my special little guy ribbluyel.gif (9/13/11) and expecting #2 (2/21/13)!

AKChix0r is offline  
#4 of 63 Old 04-20-2011, 10:43 AM
 
Join Date: Dec 2003
Location: Healing my heart
Posts: 6,146
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
1) Do you know what gender you're having? Not yet!!



2) If no, what gender to you THINK you're having? (Be sure to come back and update!) I'm thinking 2 boys!



3) If yes, which gender? Will update when we find out!!



4) Did you have a feeling you were having this gender? Nope, but hoping for at least 1 boy smile.gif .



5) What were your pregnancy symptoms or other things that led you to this feeling? Well, a few days before I found out I was pregnant, DH had a dream that I was pregnant with twin boys. I laughed & blew it off, but when we found out at 7w3d it was twins, I'm dying to know if he was right!

So far, all the gender prediction charts, calendars, calculators, etc. have all said "boy", so we'll see!!

Mama~Love is offline  
#5 of 63 Old 04-20-2011, 12:11 PM - Thread Starter
 
Gabesgrrrl's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2004
Location: Canada
Posts: 333
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)

Neat! When will you find out!?

 

Quote:
Originally Posted by Mama~Love View Post

1) Do you know what gender you're having? Not yet!!



2) If no, what gender to you THINK you're having? (Be sure to come back and update!) I'm thinking 2 boys!



3) If yes, which gender? Will update when we find out!!



4) Did you have a feeling you were having this gender? Nope, but hoping for at least 1 boy smile.gif .



5) What were your pregnancy symptoms or other things that led you to this feeling? Well, a few days before I found out I was pregnant, DH had a dream that I was pregnant with twin boys. I laughed & blew it off, but when we found out at 7w3d it was twins, I'm dying to know if he was right!

So far, all the gender prediction charts, calendars, calculators, etc. have all said "boy", so we'll see!!


 


Mother of reading.gif, REPlaySkateboard04HL.gifjammin.gif and babyf.gifborn Oct. 5th after angel.gif  angel.gif angel.gif. Social Media Manager and writer by day, Bloomin' Belly Soap maker by night.

Gabesgrrrl is offline  
#6 of 63 Old 04-20-2011, 01:13 PM
 
theboysmama's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2005
Posts: 3,380
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)

1) Do you know what gender you're having? Not yet, but we will be finding out for the first time at my 20 wk scan. (around the end of May)

 

2) If no, what gender to you THINK you're having? I feel very strongly that baby is a boy.

 

3) If yes, which gender?

 

4) Did you have a feeling you were having this gender? I have a very strong feeling that it is a boy. with my first 2 I knew they were boys and was right. With the second 2 I never really was sure (1 was a boy and 1 was a girl), with my 5th I knew he was a boy and right so we will see if the record continues.

 

5) What were your pregnancy symptoms or other things that led you to this feeling? all of my pg's have been so different it is hard to base it on that. I am NOT craving sugar like I did with my daughter though. Also after having 4 boys and 1 girl I think a boy is a good guess:)


nicole wild.gif,  mom to 3 boys here on earth jumpers.gif 9, 7 and 4.5 and 2 girl's fly-by-nursing2.gif2.5 and 10/16/11. Always remembering my babies in heaven:  Sam (9/7/05) at 12.5 wks  angel1.gif, Morgan (2/13/06) at 6 wks angel1.gif , Emeric angel2.gif (8/9/10 at 17 wks) and Pepper angel1.gif (11/26/10) at 8wks. 

theboysmama is offline  
#7 of 63 Old 04-20-2011, 01:47 PM
~pi
 
~pi's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2005
Posts: 3,773
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)

1) Do you know what gender you're having?

 

No, but we are planning to find out this time. (We didn't with DS, which was also fun.)

 

2) If no, what gender to you THINK you're having? (Be sure to come back and update!)

 

I am thinking girl, but that may just be hope on my part, because DS has been begging for a little sister for about 2 years now.

 

5) What were your pregnancy symptoms or other things that led you to this feeling?

 

I couldn't really say. Just a guess. I would not put money on it!

 

By the way, curious note related to this topic: I refer to whether the baby is a girl or boy as the baby's sex, not its gender. The ultrasound tech won't really be able to tell me whether the kid will be masculine or feminine, after all! I think gender is much more complex than just what genitalia one has. Is that just me? I notice that most people here seem to call it 'gender' and I wonder if I am missing something.

Gabesgrrrl likes this.

professor & maman de DS1 (6) & DS2 (1)

~pi is offline  
#8 of 63 Old 04-20-2011, 01:56 PM
 
PseudoDiva's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2009
Location: California
Posts: 211
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
My understanding is that gender refers to a social construct, as in gender roles. Sex refers to the equipment you're issued. ;-)

Loving wife to a wonderful and Godly man, hug.gif  and SAHM to two beautiful boys, DS1, natural hospital birth (2/2010) and DS2, beautiful homebirth (10/2011) cd.gifnursex2.gif

PseudoDiva is offline  
#9 of 63 Old 04-20-2011, 02:00 PM
~pi
 
~pi's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2005
Posts: 3,773
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Quote:
Originally Posted by PseudoDiva View Post

My understanding is that gender refers to a social construct, as in gender roles. Sex refers to the equipment you're issued. ;-)

This is my understanding as well, though I didn't state it nearly so clearly. :-)

 

So, to my mind, what you can see in the ultrasound is the kid's sex. Are people just uncomfortable calling it that?


professor & maman de DS1 (6) & DS2 (1)

~pi is offline  
#10 of 63 Old 04-20-2011, 03:53 PM
 
amyandelle's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2004
Location: Illinois
Posts: 1,995
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)

1) Do you know what gender you're having? We are hoping to find out on Friday :)

 

2) If no, what gender to you THINK you're having? (Be sure to come back and update!) Well, I thought for sure it was a boy however I had an ultrasound last week and while the tech was measuring I got a pretty good peek between the legs and I really think it is a girl from what I saw (and what I did not see). I asked the tech to check the gender and she said that she could not see clearly to even guess and that it was too early... I was 16 weeks 5 days at that point..... too early my butt..... LOL ;)

 

3) If yes, which gender?.........

 

4) Did you have a feeling you were having this gender?........

 

5) What were your pregnancy symptoms or other things that led you to this feeling? So from my symptoms (or lack of) I was thinking that this is for sure a boy because this pregnancy has been different from the last three which are all girls ;) I have only had heartburn this time when I eat bad foods. With my three girls I had horrible heartburn from before the BFP up until the day I delivered. I have had little to no cravings this time and always had tons of cravings with the girls. I also had less morning sickness this time around. I have never actually vomit with any of my pregnancies but this time I really didn't have tons of nausea either.

 

Amy :)

  


Amy praying.gifbfinfant.gifslinggirl.gif familybed2.gif saynovax.gifsewmachine.gif crochetsmilie.gifWAHM to energy.gifElle 3/2/2004, joy.gifMeadow 12/02/2006, bouncy.gifAzaliah 4/09/2009, and baby.gif Olive 09/23/2011. I have been partners.gif married to my husband Bill since 2/22/03.....

amyandelle is offline  
#11 of 63 Old 04-20-2011, 07:08 PM
 
AlexisT's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2007
Location: Central PA
Posts: 2,268
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 1 Post(s)


Quote:
Originally Posted by ~pi View Post

This is my understanding as well, though I didn't state it nearly so clearly. :-)

 

So, to my mind, what you can see in the ultrasound is the kid's sex. Are people just uncomfortable calling it that?

 

I think there's a misconception that sex and gender are interchangeable terms. I make the same distinction you do--sex is physical, gender is psychological/social.

 

Sometimes I think I'm having a boy. Sometimes I think girl. I would kind of like another girl, but it's not a very strong preference. DH would like one of each, since this may well be our last. DD is convinced she's getting a baby brother.
 

Then again, my mother was convinced with babies #2 and 3 that she was having boys. Both were girls. So I don't put much stock in feelings. I was right last time, but I had a 50/50 shot! (Approximately, etc)

 


DD 01/2007, DS 09/2011

AlexisT is offline  
#12 of 63 Old 04-20-2011, 08:11 PM
 
Join Date: Dec 2003
Location: Healing my heart
Posts: 6,146
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Quote:
Originally Posted by Gabesgrrrl View Post

Neat! When will you find out!?

 



 


I don't know. I have an appt. on Monday, maybe it will be scheduled then.

Mama~Love is offline  
#13 of 63 Old 04-20-2011, 08:12 PM
 
lifeguard's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2008
Location: Coyote Rock Farm
Posts: 6,574
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 1 Post(s)

We will hopefully find out May 2nd. I think this one's a boy. I don't have a preference either way but if this is another boy than when I'm pregnant again I will definitely have a preference for a girl!


Surviving sleep deprivation one day at a time with dd (Oct '11) & ds (Oct '08).

lifeguard is offline  
#14 of 63 Old 04-20-2011, 09:18 PM
 
Jane's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2002
Location: Kenmore, Washington
Posts: 7,110
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)


 

Quote:
Originally Posted by AKChix0r View Post
2) I think it is a girl, which sucks, but as long as she's healthy, blah blah blah...


This makes me sad tonight. 


Homebirth Midwife biggrinbounce.gif

After 4 m/c, our stillheart.gif is here!

Jane is offline  
#15 of 63 Old 04-20-2011, 10:26 PM
 
Veronika01's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2007
Posts: 513
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Quote:
Originally Posted by Jane View Post


 



This makes me sad tonight. 


Me too. greensad.gif

Veronika01 is offline  
#16 of 63 Old 04-21-2011, 03:43 AM
 
mingus's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2007
Posts: 141
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)


Quote:

1) Do you know what gender you're having?

Not yet. U/S is scheduled for May 18th. Wish it were sooner!

 

2) If no, what gender to you THINK you're having? (Be sure to come back and update!)

Not sure. For the first six weeks or so I thought boy, but then I realized that was probably based just on having had a boy the first time and knowing that DH is nervous about raising a girl.

It turns out most of our family (parents, siblings) thinks we're having a girl. Knowing that is interfering with my trying to get a read on my own gut feeling. I am getting excited about the possibility of a girl, and DH has warmed up a lot to the idea too (he's realizing that the rumors that girls are harder to raise aren't necessarily true).

 

5) What were your pregnancy symptoms or other things that led you to this feeling?

Compared to last time I have had more nausea (but still not so bad I couldn't eat), better skin and hair, a bit more weight gain so far, more tired in the first tri, and more rapidly growing bbs. Other than that it feels about the same.



 

mingus is offline  
#17 of 63 Old 04-21-2011, 05:24 AM
Banned
 
Join Date: Mar 2006
Location: the Circle K
Posts: 6,047
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)


Quote:
Originally Posted by AKChix0r View Post

1) Nope, not until the end of May (20 weeks)
2) I think it is a girl, which sucks, but as long as she's healthy, blah blah blah...
3) N/A
4) N/A
5) only dream I have had about the baby, it was a girl. Mother in-law did the infamous pencil test (that has been 100% accurate for everyone she has done it to) and my results were two kids, girl first, boy second. Chinese gender chart thing (90% accurate, from what I've heard) said girl. Getting SERIOUSLY fugly (girls take away beauty), and a whole myriad of other old wives tales. We'll see. Both hubs and I would prefer a boy.

 

Are you planning on seeing a counselor before your baby is born about your ambivalent feelings toward him/her and your negative feelings toward baby girls? That is a lot of negativity to put on an innocent, unborn baby. :( ((hugs mama))
 

 

lalaland42 is offline  
#18 of 63 Old 04-21-2011, 05:55 AM
 
StephandOwen's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2004
Location: Kentucky
Posts: 8,809
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)

1) Do you know what gender you're having?   No idea yet. We'll try to find out at the end of May.

 

2) If no, what gender to you THINK you're having? (Be sure to come back and update!)   I have no idea. Some days I think boy, other days I think girl. With my ds I knew he was a boy so this not really having a feeling either way is bothering me! LOL!

 

3) If yes, which gender?

 

4) Did you have a feeling you were having this gender?

 

5) What were your pregnancy symptoms or other things that led you to this feeling?   This pregnancy is totally different from my son's, which makes me lean towards girl. But when I go out shopping I'm totally not thinking girl (which is weird because I would LOVE to have a girl, I'm just not feeling it this time). I would be happy either way. DH wants another boy. DS originally said he thought it would be a girl but has flip-flopped back and forth the last couple weeks between girl and boy. My mom guessed girl, but then admitted that with her 7 kids she was only right once so I don't know how helpful that is lol.gifAbout half our friends and family say girl and the other half say boy, so it's pretty split right now.


Steph, DH Jason (1-1-11), DS Owen (10-3-03) and DS Kai (10-13-11)

StephandOwen is offline  
#19 of 63 Old 04-21-2011, 07:06 AM
 
penguintattoo's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2008
Location: Watertown, NY
Posts: 502
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)

1) Do you know what gender you're having? Nope, but we should find out sometime next month

 

2) If no, what gender to you THINK you're having? (Be sure to come back and update!) I keep thinking girl, but I thought boy with DD so I'm probably wrong lol

 

3) If yes, which gender?

 

4) Did you have a feeling you were having this gender?

 

5) What were your pregnancy symptoms or other things that led you to this feeling? I feel a lot like I felt with DD, everyone else is saying its a boy but only bc i already have a girl


joy.gif:Mommy to Lennon Elizabeth 11/27/09 and somebody new, due 10/08joy.gif:

penguintattoo is offline  
#20 of 63 Old 04-21-2011, 07:18 AM
~pi
 
~pi's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2005
Posts: 3,773
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)

 

Quote:
Originally Posted by Jane View Post


This makes me sad tonight. 

 

Quote:
Originally Posted by Veronika01 View Post



Quote:
Originally Posted by Jane View Post

 

This makes me sad tonight.

Me too. greensad.gif
 

 

Quote:
Originally Posted by lalaland42 View Post

 

Are you planning on seeing a counselor before your baby is born about your ambivalent feelings toward him/her and your negative feelings toward baby girls? That is a lot of negativity to put on an innocent, unborn baby. :( ((hugs mama))
 


It's quite common for people to have preferences one way or the other, and then those totally vanish once they meet the actual baby. It's most common with first babies, because until the baby is here, s/he may not feel real. It doesn't mean counseling is necessary. (Though of course counseling is great if the person him/herself feels it would help.)

 

Let's not make people feel badly for being honest, please. I'm sure everyone is going to love their babes, no matter whether they are boys or girls.

 

ETA: There is also an element of writing style differences here. Different people express themselves in different ways, so someone's words can come across more strongly or differently to different people. Totally normal. Keep in mind that someone may not mean exactly what you are interpreting.

 

Gabesgrrrl, capretta and Starlit like this.

professor & maman de DS1 (6) & DS2 (1)

~pi is offline  
#21 of 63 Old 04-21-2011, 07:28 AM
 
AlexisT's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2007
Location: Central PA
Posts: 2,268
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 1 Post(s)

I think there's a difference between a preference and saying that having a girl sucks, or that being pregnant with a girl "takes away beauty." That's rather more strongly expressed than "I'd like a boy."


DD 01/2007, DS 09/2011

AlexisT is offline  
#22 of 63 Old 04-21-2011, 07:44 AM
 
capretta's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2010
Posts: 517
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Quote:
Originally Posted by ~pi View Post

ETA: There is also an element of writing style differences here. Different people express themselves in different ways, so someone's words can come across more strongly or differently to different people. Totally normal. Keep in mind that someone may not mean exactly what you are interpreting.

yeahthat.gif It's hard to really get to know someone through a few posts on a forum like this, but given the other funny stories we've heard from AKChix0r (check the chat thread), my guess is that she just expresses herself a little differently (maybe a little more bluntly) than others might. Personally, I read the "takes away beauty" as tongue in cheek.
~pi likes this.
capretta is offline  
#23 of 63 Old 04-21-2011, 08:02 AM
~pi
 
~pi's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2005
Posts: 3,773
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)


Quote:
Originally Posted by AlexisT View Post

I think there's a difference between a preference and saying that having a girl sucks, or that being pregnant with a girl "takes away beauty." That's rather more strongly expressed than "I'd like a boy."

 

Yes, but that's what I meant about writing styles. Some people use a more expressive, out-there style. Some people joke about things that others find not joke-worthy. Etc. It's hard to really understand what someone means without having a real conversation about it. KWIM?

 

Anyway, I didn't want to kick up a big fuss, just wanted to avoid a pile-up on Karli, who (as we can see from other threads) obviously has an unconventional sense of humor. (Karli, I hope you don't mind that observation!) smile.gif

 

ETA: Or, what capretta said, more quickly than I did. winky.gif


professor & maman de DS1 (6) & DS2 (1)

~pi is offline  
#24 of 63 Old 04-21-2011, 08:14 AM
 
puente's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2011
Location: Oakland, CA
Posts: 149
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)

Thanks capretta and ~pi, I think you guys are spot on. And if we can't be honest here, where can we be honest?

 

Re the "takes away beauty", that's an old wives tale, that if you are having a girl she takes mama's "pretty",  and it's considered a way to predict baby's sex.   There might be a clearer way to say that in the world, but I don't understand why people are reacting to it.  Karli was just saying all the non-scientific ways to predict sex were pointing towards girl. 

 

While "sucks" might be a strong term, I'm with capretta and ~pi that it's just an expression.  It doesn't have to mean misogyny is involved, it might mean that they have access to a lot of boy clothes and it'd be way cheaper if baby was a boy.   Karli likely doesn't mean either, but it'd be great if we could give each other the benefit of the doubt. 

 

 

puente is offline  
#25 of 63 Old 04-21-2011, 08:59 AM
 
livacreature's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2011
Location: Pittsburgh, PA
Posts: 544
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)

I will say that while I think that this passenger is a boy, he's totally sucked the pretty right out of me.  Some people glow, other's have a light green tinge and random facial hair that was never there before.  shrug.gif

Gabesgrrrl likes this.

Social working mommy to babygirl.gif 10/10/11, three cats, and a dog.

livacreature is offline  
#26 of 63 Old 04-21-2011, 09:34 AM
 
yellowdart's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2010
Location: Iowa
Posts: 585
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)

At first, I felt like I was probably having a boy.  Now I don't feel strongly either way.  I don't put any faith in that initial feeling; I know it was just me imagining things. 

 

I get the distinction between sex and gender too.  I understand what people mean when they talk about the gender of the babe, though, and I don't suppose it necessarily means they will be unwelcoming of various gender identities. 

 

On a similar topic, it really bothers me how baby things are so gender-specific, with sports things and tools and cars and things in the BOY section and flowers and ruffles and things in the GIRL section.  I hate to have gender norms forced on my baby like that.  I know I can shop from whatever section I want, and there's some specifically "gender neutral" things out there, but I also know once we announce the baby's sex it will influence the colors and themes of the gifts we get and the way other people treat our baby.  Plus, there's a really cute blue and green frog onesie at Target that just has to say "daddy's little man" or something like that.  I guess I shouldn't put my daughter in clothes that specificaly advertise penis-having.  Why'd they have to go and do that?  Why isn't there a cute blue and green frog onesie that says "daddy's little woman" ?   So yeah.  Gender.


heartbeat.gif  Baby girl arrived 10/11/11 heartbeat.gif

yellowdart is offline  
#27 of 63 Old 04-21-2011, 10:44 AM
 
AKChix0r's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: Alaska
Posts: 373
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Holy.... Seriously?

Ok, let me clear the air as best I can.

I am very blunt and don't sugarcoat things, and my sarcasm tends to make me come across as a dark little rain cloud of hate. It is who I am. I'm a very happy person, but I have a dark sense of humor. As a result, I tend to get along better with guys - they say what they mean, often with less tact and diplomacy. I appreciate that quality.

As a result, I really, really worry about having a female child. I can't relate to a lot of that behavior and needs. I mean, look how my one, off-hand, flippant comment got a bunch of you worked up - how am I going to handle an overemotional teenage daughter? It freaks me out!

The other reasons are more shallow. My husband is the long-awaited only son with 5 older sisters, and has joked that we'll keep having kids until we have a boy. I believe it is a vagina, not a clown car, and I'd like to stick with one, maybe two tops (not that there's anything wrong with more, I just know my limitations and would like to go back to work in a few years). I know he feels the same, but I also know how much he wants a son. It would be awesome to get lucky this first time around and not feel pressure to "try" for a boy later.

Also, I hate pink.

I'm apologize to those that were "saddened" by my hastily typed smartphone response. It was not my intent to upset a bunch of pregos. If you're anything like me, you're upset by enough random things throughout the day and don't need any more stimulation!

Alaskan Wife and Mama to my special little guy ribbluyel.gif (9/13/11) and expecting #2 (2/21/13)!

AKChix0r is offline  
#28 of 63 Old 04-21-2011, 10:48 AM
 
StephandOwen's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2004
Location: Kentucky
Posts: 8,809
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)


 

Quote:
Originally Posted by AKChix0r View Post

As a result, I really, really worry about having a female child. I can't relate to a lot of that behavior and needs. I mean, look how my one, off-hand, flippant comment got a bunch of you worked up - how am I going to handle an overemotional teenage daughter? It freaks me out!


I don't think you have anything to apologize for. Personally, I'm terrified to have a girl. I know my husband is too. I would love to have a baby girl to dress all cute and do the whole hair bows and dresses thing with..... but after the baby stage I'd be lost. And, as selfish as it is, I kinda like being the only princess in the house (yes, dh and ds both call me the princess of the house). LOL! Would I love a daughter? Heck yeah. But it doesn't mean I'm not terrified to have one.


Steph, DH Jason (1-1-11), DS Owen (10-3-03) and DS Kai (10-13-11)

StephandOwen is offline  
#29 of 63 Old 04-21-2011, 10:58 AM
 
AKChix0r's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: Alaska
Posts: 373
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Also, I should add, I'll be excited either way. I just have my preference, that's all. I hear girl are so much easier than boys up until the preteen/teen years, and it will be really fun to get involved in volunteering for stuff like Girl Scouts. I'm not totally against the idea, just would be nice to know one way or the other so I can stop listening to predictions.

Alaskan Wife and Mama to my special little guy ribbluyel.gif (9/13/11) and expecting #2 (2/21/13)!

AKChix0r is offline  
#30 of 63 Old 04-21-2011, 11:04 AM
~pi
 
~pi's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2005
Posts: 3,773
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)

Yeah, I think the whole thing about societal gender role expectations can really play into feelings about the baby's sex. I admit that even though I am thinking/half-hoping girl, I am also daunted by the prospect of raising a girl in the current hyper-sexualized climate for little girls. I mean, when I was coming up on seven years old, this ad was out. And now you can get a push-up bikini for your seven year old. yikes.gif

 

I like to think that I have some influence as a parent, but as DS gets older, I see more and more how much his views and opinions are also shaped by the culture around us. (And for what it's worth, so far, that shaping has been pretty benign with my kindergartener, but he isn't even 5 yet. It's only going to get stronger, I know.)

 

dear abbey likes this.

professor & maman de DS1 (6) & DS2 (1)

~pi is offline  
Reply

Quick Reply
Message:
Drag and Drop File Upload
Drag files here to attach!
Upload Progress: 0
Options

Register Now

In order to be able to post messages on the Mothering Forums forums, you must first register.
Please enter your desired user name, your email address and other required details in the form below.
User Name:
If you do not want to register, fill this field only and the name will be used as user name for your post.
Password
Please enter a password for your user account. Note that passwords are case-sensitive.
Password:
Confirm Password:
Email Address
Please enter a valid email address for yourself.
Email Address:

Log-in

Human Verification

In order to verify that you are a human and not a spam bot, please enter the answer into the following box below based on the instructions contained in the graphic.



User Tag List

Thread Tools
Show Printable Version Show Printable Version
Email this Page Email this Page


Forum Jump: 

Posting Rules  
You may post new threads
You may post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are Off