Sharing my koi assisted waterbirth plans - Page 2 - Mothering Forums

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#31 of 59 Old 07-01-2011, 06:28 AM
 
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Oh I am so happy to hear this is a farce. I know there are extreme births but the catching the baby in the net...that's just too much. I would have believed someone was crazy enough to do this if it wasn't for the net comment. I was hoping this was all one big joke. 


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#32 of 59 Old 07-01-2011, 09:40 AM
 
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headscratch.gif  I wonder if I can get away with giving birth in a wolves den.  I like the name "Births with wolves". 

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#33 of 59 Old 07-01-2011, 03:07 PM
 
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I laughed so hard I think I pulled something...

The new running joke in our house is that we are going to have to stop on our way to the hospital and pick up a bag of goldfish for the birthing tub. 

 

I salute you. 


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#34 of 59 Old 07-02-2011, 11:00 AM
 
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Wait, this was a hoax? I've read through the thread several times and I'm totally confused at whether it is real or not. Do I have placenta brain or something?

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#35 of 59 Old 07-02-2011, 11:07 AM
 
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I hope you are getting a lot of ad revenue off all those clicks, Jane!

Brilliantly done. orngbiggrin.gif

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#36 of 59 Old 07-02-2011, 11:48 AM
 
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ddcc.

 

Brilliant. I absolutely loved it.

 

Also discovered that approximately one in ten people have no discernible sense of humour.

 

 

 

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#37 of 59 Old 07-02-2011, 01:30 PM
 
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I don't think it's that they have no sense of humor, I think that it's that they don't think giving birth with fish or catching a baby in a net is funny.

ETA: basically she took one of the most precious, heart warming, fulfilling, life changing events someone will EVER go through and made it into a big joke just to get attention.
 

Quote:
Originally Posted by Vancouver Mommy View Post

ddcc.

 

Brilliant. I absolutely loved it.

 

Also discovered that approximately one in ten people have no discernible sense of humour.

 

 

 



 


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#38 of 59 Old 07-02-2011, 01:44 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by KABB View Post

I don't think it's that they have no sense of humor, I think that it's that they don't think giving birth with fish or catching a baby in a net is funny.

ETA: basically she took one of the most precious, heart warming, fulfilling, life changing events someone will EVER go through and made it into a big joke just to get attention.
 


Oh yeah, that is *exactly* what she did. The same way that virtually every stand-up comedian has done since...well since babies were being born.  People need to get a sense of humor.

 

 

Like this site http://www.quotegarden.com/pregnancy.html

 

or even better-Dave Barry> These are from "Babies and Other Hazards of Sex."

Quote:
Pregnancy 
"The female reproductive system is extremely complicated, because females contain a great many organs, with new ones being discovered every day." (pg. 11)

Diapering 
"Oh, I realize there are diaper services that come to your house and drop off clean cloth diapers and pick up the dirty ones, but even those diapers are now disposable. The instant the driver is out of sight of your house, he hurls the dirty diapers into the street and drives off briskly." (pg. 22)

"If your baby has diaper rash, the pediatrician may say 'Just leave the diaper off for a while.' This would be a wonderful idea if the baby would stop shooting wastes out of its various orifices..." (pg. 46)

Anesthesia 
"Here is the system that was used for having babies during the Eisenhower Administration: At the first sign of pregnancy, the husband would rush the wife to the hospital, where she would be given modern medical drugs that would keep her from feeling contractions, or anything else, including a volcanic eruption in the delivery room...One big problem with this system is that drugs can have adverse effects on the baby, as is evidenced by the fact that every single person born during the 40s, 50s or 60s is really screwed up. 

"Today we have a much better childbirth system...the woman is not allowed to have any drugs unless she agrees, in writing, to feel guilty." (pp. 26-27)

Delivery 
"...You will be taken to the delivery room, where you will be placed in the Standard Childbirth Position...Medical researchers have tried for decades to come up with a childbirth position even more humiliating than this one, but they have had no success." (pg. 33)

"What to do immediately after birth: Close your eyes tightly. This is in case the doctor takes it into his head to show you the placenta, which is a highly unattractive object...In the old days, when people were decent, the placenta was disposed of quickly and quietly and was never talked about...now people bandy it about openly in public, as if it were a prize-winning bass." (pg. 35)
 
 

 

 

http://www.quotegarden.com/pregnancy.html

 

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#39 of 59 Old 07-02-2011, 02:02 PM
 
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Calling attention to a highly questionable way to birth on a public board is worth bowing down to her? Weird. I too found it offensive she thinks those people that chose to UC are stupid but yet birthing with a bunch of large fish isn't. Whether this is made up or not it's just another ploy that draws attention once again to the judgement of how ridiculous the natural minded can be. Some people work really hard to go natural and deal with harrassment and judgements and this just seems like a strange way to get attention whether it is a joke or not. If it is a joke then you sure do have a lot of time on your hands to screw with people. Calling more attention to Mothering by the seemingly endless amounts of new trolls that are appearing daily is a major bummer. It was so nice when I could actually trust the people that were posting for real and needed actual support and advice. THis is just above and beyond.

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#40 of 59 Old 07-02-2011, 02:06 PM
 
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What bothers me is that she is literally pulling attention to Mothering. It's unecessary. Anyone remember the sweet mom who homebirthed and I believe Uc'd her triplets? SHe received threats and harrassment to the point of having to leave Mothering. So pulling attention like this is unfair. The number of crazy postings I see now are obviously troll like and this just adds to it. In a way it's just making fun of those that do birth with dolphins. Or UC. Or don't vaccinate. What's ridiculous to some is a way of life to others.

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#41 of 59 Old 07-02-2011, 02:09 PM
 
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ha so now if some people took it seriously, then they clearly have no sense of humor. Nice. I have seen some crazy stuff on these boards and truly I wouldn't doubt someone attempting this. Catching a baby with net? Some babies have been "caught" by floors and toilets. Now the world of Mothering just gets more trolls and more crazy. Real funny. 

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#42 of 59 Old 07-02-2011, 02:20 PM - Thread Starter
 
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I'm no troll. I've been here since 2002! I'm an active member.

I shared this with my DDC, my Facebook, and my midwife. I'm not drawing attention to MDC - except that one fish lady who had sought me out across the Internet to warn me I'm gonna kill my fish!
I'm pretty much an open book, my site has real name and real due date on it. Those are my real fish, too.

I devote my professional life to helping other women get the births they desire. I resent being called a troll.
I do happen to think UC is a bad choice. I'm a midwife. What else would you expect me to think?

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#43 of 59 Old 07-02-2011, 02:25 PM
 
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Jane=

 

I meant to add to my post that I love the photos of your fish! My brother has small koi pond but yours?  Wow!  Is it a ton of work?


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#44 of 59 Old 07-02-2011, 02:32 PM - Thread Starter
 
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It doesn't feel like a lot of work, but it's definitely some amount of grungy work.
The biggest thing is the food cost in the summer. They eat a lot. We now have a bunch over 36". They eat 4 cups of food a day.
And the learning curve on the chemistry is substantial. But once you have a system, it's not too bad. We save on lots of worries by being indoors.
But I love to pet them. They are very friendly. And since I work out of my home, my clients kids get to feed them, too, which is so much fun to watch.

Thanks for asking!
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#45 of 59 Old 07-02-2011, 02:39 PM
 
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My brothers is small and only has 3 fish but he says its a bear so I can imagine.

 

Have you seen the koi pond app for Iphone? When I get stressed It calms me right down, LOL.


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#46 of 59 Old 07-02-2011, 02:44 PM - Thread Starter
 
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I like the cricket noises on the app. And feeding the fish.
Some app I had, I customized the fish to look like mine.

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#47 of 59 Old 07-02-2011, 02:51 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Jane View Post

I like the cricket noises on the app. And feeding the fish.
Some app I had, I customized the fish to look like mine.


very cool!


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#48 of 59 Old 07-02-2011, 02:52 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Jane View Post
 I'm a midwife. What else would you expect me to think?


I don't exactly see how that would mean you think UC is not a good choice. My midwife has had 4UCs and is completely fine if when it comes down to the birth the mom decides she wants to UC. She trusts birth and for some people it is the right choice. 


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#49 of 59 Old 07-02-2011, 07:45 PM
 
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I don't exactly see how that would mean you think UC is not a good choice. My midwife has had 4UCs and is completely fine if when it comes down to the birth the mom decides she wants to UC. She trusts birth and for some people it is the right choice. 

 

Well if you ask an accountant, I'd bet most of them would say to do your taxes with them. If you ask a travel agent, they will tell you to book your trip with them and not online. If you ask a hairdresser, he or she would tell you not to cut your own hair.  Doesn't mean you can't do it yourself, but that's their opinion.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 


 

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#50 of 59 Old 07-02-2011, 08:03 PM
 
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Quote:
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I don't exactly see how that would mean you think UC is not a good choice. My midwife has had 4UCs and is completely fine if when it comes down to the birth the mom decides she wants to UC. She trusts birth and for some people it is the right choice. 

That's great for your midwife. More power to her. She is entitled to her opinion regarding UC and act upon it as she desires. However, Jane is also stating her opinion regarding UC and acting upon it as she desires as well. Lets not go down the TRUST BIRTH road on Jane's thread. Start another thread if you desire.
 

 


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Quote:
Originally Posted by by-the-lake View Post

That's great for your midwife. More power to her. She is entitled to her opinion regarding UC and act upon it as she desires. However, Jane is also stating her opinion regarding UC and acting upon it as she desires as well. Lets not go down the TRUST BIRTH road on Jane's thread. Start another thread if you desire.
 

 

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#52 of 59 Old 07-04-2011, 03:51 AM
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Quote:
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ddcc.

 

Brilliant. I absolutely loved it.

 

Also discovered that approximately one in ten people have no discernible sense of humour.

 

 

 


This. 100 times this.


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#53 of 59 Old 07-04-2011, 04:04 PM
 
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The comments on the blog are priceless! lol.gif
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#54 of 59 Old 07-04-2011, 06:28 PM
 
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Um, obviously there are some people right on this forum without a sense of humour!  I thought it was brilliant, especially since I have read so many crazy birthplans (both here on MDC and on other places on the web)!

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I haven't posted here in a number of years, but have been lurking on this DDC because I am expecting again. However, after following this thread,  had to come out of lurking just to say, Jane,  got a real kick out of your blog. Your contributions to this DDC club are appreciated by many, for both practical and entertainment purposes. 

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#56 of 59 Old 07-16-2011, 01:38 PM
 
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Yes
 

Quote:
Originally Posted by Avani View Post

Calling attention to a highly questionable way to birth on a public board is worth bowing down to her? Weird. I too found it offensive she thinks those people that chose to UC are stupid but yet birthing with a bunch of large fish isn't. Whether this is made up or not it's just another ploy that draws attention once again to the judgement of how ridiculous the natural minded can be. Some people work really hard to go natural and deal with harrassment and judgements and this just seems like a strange way to get attention whether it is a joke or not. If it is a joke then you sure do have a lot of time on your hands to screw with people. Calling more attention to Mothering by the seemingly endless amounts of new trolls that are appearing daily is a major bummer. It was so nice when I could actually trust the people that were posting for real and needed actual support and advice. THis is just above and beyond.



 


Abra, Married to George, Mother to DS 12/03 & DD1 08/09 & DD2 12/11.  We are planning our next adventure to South America in April 2014!
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#57 of 59 Old 07-16-2011, 08:38 PM
 
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There people who give birth with dolphins in open ocean or in open see. There a lot of crazy people. So, not an idea that someone would actually give birth with koi does not, sadly, seem so weired anymore.

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#58 of 59 Old 07-18-2011, 02:51 PM
 
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Have you considered nurse sharks instead of koi?

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#59 of 59 Old 07-18-2011, 05:54 PM
 
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Quote:
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Have you considered nurse sharks instead of koi?



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