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#61 of 128 Old 09-05-2011, 07:17 PM
 
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Thank you so much for the information, Tutu.  I've never even heard of such a thing hinted at.  My babies have always had what seem like frequent hiccups, so this is certainly something I'm going to be thinking about.

 

I know I may not speak for everyone, but I just want to say that you shouldn't feel bad or guilty for posting your baby's story here.  IMO, a Due Date Club is all about love and support, no matter what the situation may be.  I feel like at this time, there's a grieving among all of us for your loss, even though we don't know you personally.  I hope you find strength, love, and comfort here, instead of feeling like you're intruding on any of our needs.  I certainly feel like your needs take precedent over mine, at this point.  I've been thinking of you so often.  It must be terrible to wait for labor to come while your womb remains still, and I can't imagine being in your place right now.  I just want you to feel like you're not alone, that we are all surrounding you with our love and prayers.  grouphug.gif


SAHM to Melinda (Oct '03), Jacob (Aug '05),  Alex (Apr '08), and baby.gif Malcolm (Sept 29, '11)

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#62 of 128 Old 09-05-2011, 08:00 PM
 
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Thank you for checking in with us ... I know that all of us are thinking about you and praying for you and your family.

We care very much about you and your baby.  Both you and your baby are still very much a part of this due date club. 

I doubt any of us will ever forget your journey.

Many blessings ...

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dust.gifFour-eyed tattooed fairy godmother queer, mama to my lucky star (5) and little bird (2.5). Resident storyteller at www.thestoryforest.com. Enchanting audiostories for curious kids. Come play in the forest!
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#63 of 128 Old 09-05-2011, 08:14 PM
 
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I don't know what your hospital has in place already, but I volunteered for a local L&D bereavement team. Bring a camera, and take more pictures than you think you'll need or want. Ask for prints of baby's hands and feet. If you are up to it, hold your little one for as long as you can. If baby's skin isn't too fragile, you can take hand and foot impressions. If baby has hair, take a lock as a keepsake. Ask to keep any blankets and clothing if the hospital uses their own.

I wish that no parents had to go through this...it is horrible to lose a little one. hug2.gif

Wife to DH, mama to bikenew.gif DD (7) ribboncesarean.gif, babyf.gif DS born 3/12 ribboncesarean.gif, and have had five early losses. angel1.gif
I have Stiff Person Syndrome and my other car is a candy apple red Rascal. Feel free to ask me about it. wheelchair.gif
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#64 of 128 Old 09-05-2011, 08:15 PM
 
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Thank you for sharing that with us. candle.gif


Nicole treehugger.gif  Busy with my two boys.jog.gifdiaper.gif  The 'big boy' too. peace.gifOh, and a sweet baby girl, born at home in October. love.gif

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#65 of 128 Old 09-05-2011, 08:23 PM
 
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I am so so sorry for your loss. Thank you for keeping us updated.

I agree with camera girl on taking as many pics as possible, the casts and the prints (oh how I wish I had prints). Hold your baby as much as possible, I regret that my time with my son was so short. Contact now I lay me down to sleep and see if they have a photographer in your area that can take photos (before, of, and after the birth).

I am praying for you and your family.


nicole wild.gif,  mom to 3 boys here on earth jumpers.gif 9, 7 and 4.5 and 2 girl's fly-by-nursing2.gif2.5 and 10/16/11. Always remembering my babies in heaven:  Sam (9/7/05) at 12.5 wks  angel1.gif, Morgan (2/13/06) at 6 wks angel1.gif , Emeric angel2.gif (8/9/10 at 17 wks) and Pepper angel1.gif (11/26/10) at 8wks. 

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#66 of 128 Old 09-05-2011, 08:28 PM
 
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I'm unsure if you have a photographer already lined up for the birth. I've heard wonderful things about this organization http://www.nowilaymedowntosleep.org/ They have a network of professional photographers who will do photos for women experiencing a loss, at no charge. I'd encourage you to contact them unless you have other means lined up.


Becka, partnered with Eric. Momma to Kenz, 12, Abbey, 9, Nik, 8, Johanna, 3.5, and newone on the way in October

 

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#67 of 128 Old 09-05-2011, 08:36 PM
 
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I am so sorry for your loss. You and your family will be in my thoughts and prayers.

Wife to my hubby and SAHM to two boys -  DS1 (2) and DS2 (newborn).  Forever missing our three angels in Heaven. 

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#68 of 128 Old 09-05-2011, 08:57 PM
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Originally Posted by Leiahs View Post
I know I may not speak for everyone, but I just want to say that you shouldn't feel bad or guilty for posting your baby's story here.  IMO, a Due Date Club is all about love and support, no matter what the situation may be.  I feel like at this time, there's a grieving among all of us for your loss, even though we don't know you personally.  I hope you find strength, love, and comfort here, instead of feeling like you're intruding on any of our needs.

I completely agree. Please feel free to post and share if you want to, but also don't feel like you have to if you don't want to. You are part of the DDC and very much in our thoughts either way.


professor & maman de DS1 (6) & DS2 (1)

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#69 of 128 Old 09-05-2011, 09:28 PM
 
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Do what you need to do. Of course the loss of your baby is upsetting to me, as we are pregnant together. But it's part of life. I would feel so sad if you felt like you HAD to update us or felt like you were NOT supposed to do so. You get to do whatever feels right.

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#70 of 128 Old 09-05-2011, 10:30 PM
 
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I am so terribly sorry for your loss and had a long cry over it this weekend. It is so terrifying to know that pregnancy is so unpredictable and not something we can control. I hope you start laboring soon so you can finally grieve. Please take care of yourself during this difficult time.

I'm not going to lie, your story scares the bejeezus out of me. My guy has been hiccuping like crazy (increasing) and I have had a mix of contractions and crippling pelvic pain/pressure all weekend. However, that said, I am so thankful that you took the time to share that information with us. It made me research things so that I am now aware of what I need to look out for.

Alaskan Wife and Mama to my special little guy ribbluyel.gif (9/13/11) and expecting #2 (2/21/13)!

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#71 of 128 Old 09-05-2011, 10:31 PM
 
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Originally Posted by ~pi View Post


I completely agree. Please feel free to post and share if you want to, but also don't feel like you have to if you don't want to. You are part of the DDC and very much in our thoughts either way.



In a way we have all become a part of each other....as we share our lives through this ddc....grouphug.gif

 


mom to ds '07 first day of a new year, dd '09 in the caul, and  ds '11 at home Oct 24th

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#72 of 128 Old 09-06-2011, 04:57 AM
 
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Quote:

Originally Posted by Leiahs View Post

 

 

 

I know I may not speak for everyone, but I just want to say that you shouldn't feel bad or guilty for posting your baby's story here.  IMO, a Due Date Club is all about love and support, no matter what the situation may be.  I feel like at this time, there's a grieving among all of us for your loss, even though we don't know you personally.  I hope you find strength, love, and comfort here, instead of feeling like you're intruding on any of our needs.  I certainly feel like your needs take precedent over mine, at this point.  I've been thinking of you so often.  It must be terrible to wait for labor to come while your womb remains still, and I can't imagine being in your place right now.  I just want you to feel like you're not alone, that we are all surrounding you with our love and prayers.  grouphug.gif


 

This.  Absolutely this.  

 

 

 


Beth knit.gif.  wife to DH and Mama to DD1 heartbeat.gif (May 1-09) and DD2 heartbeat.gif (Nov 2-11)   

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#73 of 128 Old 09-06-2011, 08:09 AM
 
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Oh Tutumama,  I am so sorry for your loss.  My heart is breaking for you and I wish I could give you a hug, make you a mug of tea, and help you feel comforted and supported.  None of us here know you in person, but you have become such an important part of this DDC, and each and every one of us is greiving for you and I know we all wish we could do more to support you right now.

 

You are a courageous and brave woman, and I have been continually inspired by your optimism, attitude, honesty, and strength.  One of my instructors told us that birth is only as certain as life can get.  I am so sad for you right now.

 

It is completely unfair that this baby's life was so short, but you are very much a part of this DDC.  Please do what you are most comfortable with, but you do belong here, we all would like to be able to offer you as much support and encouragement as we can.

 

Hugs to you.  We will be praying for you, and for this baby. 


Amy, feathering our nest with sweet husband O and baby girl, P (October 2011). 
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#74 of 128 Old 09-06-2011, 09:51 AM
 
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Oh tutu...I haven't visited the DDC in several days and just now saw your post. I am so, so sorry for your loss...my heart is breaking for you.

 

You are in my thoughts and prayersgrouphug.gif.


Head over heels for DHjoy.gif bonus mama to super sweet DSS (10/9)superhero.gif and mama to DD (10/11)loveeyes.gif! nocirc.gif  sewmachine.gif  goorganic.jpg

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#75 of 128 Old 09-06-2011, 10:05 AM
 
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Originally Posted by Leiahs View Post

I know I may not speak for everyone, but I just want to say that you shouldn't feel bad or guilty for posting your baby's story here.  IMO, a Due Date Club is all about love and support, no matter what the situation may be.  I feel like at this time, there's a grieving among all of us for your loss, even though we don't know you personally.  I hope you find strength, love, and comfort here, instead of feeling like you're intruding on any of our needs.  I certainly feel like your needs take precedent over mine, at this point.  I've been thinking of you so often.  It must be terrible to wait for labor to come while your womb remains still, and I can't imagine being in your place right now.  I just want you to feel like you're not alone, that we are all surrounding you with our love and prayers.  grouphug.gif


Another "this!" for Leiahs post. You're one of us, and you can share anything and everything here. Don't feel like you have to hide your grief, but let us grieve with you. You've been and will continue to be in my daily prayers. 

 


~Iris~ Catholic mama to DD1 11/15/05 * DD2 04/28/08 * brokenheart.gif06/23/2010 * and our little rainbow DS 10/07/11 love.gif
 

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#76 of 128 Old 09-06-2011, 10:56 AM
 
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Another "this!" for Leiahs post. You're one of us, and you can share anything and everything here. Don't feel like you have to hide your grief, but let us grieve with you. You've been and will continue to be in my daily prayers. 

 


Yep, ditto what's been said! We're in this together, and right now you need as much support as possible, so we are here for you when you need us. Thank you for sharing the info about the hiccups, that's something I never knew before. {{{HUGS}}}!!

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#77 of 128 Old 09-06-2011, 11:22 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Thank you gals! I'm so glad you all don't feel too uncomfortable with my presence. I absolutely don't want to frighten anyone, I know this is a hard topic during pregnancy. Amy May is right about birth and pregnancy being as certain as life gets. Life has risks but that is life, a reality impossible to escape. I hope you all are reading many positive affirmations and I hope you all know that your instincts are the best information you have.

AKChix0r, just be aware. If they happen more than 3-4 times a day and/or the cadence is rapid (more than 10-15 hiccups per minute) insist your baby be checked for entanglement/compression. Otherwise you don't need to stress! I was always pointing it out to my care providers and I really feel like my deepest instinct knew that it was odd. I complained about it to anyone and everyone. When my mom first told me of the research it was like lightening has struck. Here are two great articles for anyone who wants to read about this warning sign. I will leave it to your discretion if you want to read:
http://www.midwiferytoday.com/enews/enews0910.asp
http://www.missinggrace.org/PrenatalCare.html

We are still having a homebirth with my OB and midwife. We still have a birth photographer so we can have lots of pictures of labor and after. I'm going to make a video montage of the pregnancy and birth as I had planned to do before. I do a lot of video editing so I think making it will be very therapeutic for me. I want to give whatever I have left to give to this little one and so I'm trying my hardest to think of things I can do. I have a designer friend who also lost a baby who has offered to help make the birth/bereavement announcements. I hope the baby has hair so I can keep a lock. My dear hubby has contacted a dental supply company to bring molding materials so we can try to get a 3D hand and foot cast. Being in Brazil has made finding these types of resources a bit difficult. I just hope our little art project works!

If you are on FB and want to joint the candle lighting here is a link: http://www.facebook.com/Love4JC

Momma to DS (2/08) and #2 due 10/11.
 
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#78 of 128 Old 09-06-2011, 11:46 AM
 
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tutu- it sounds like you are doing so much to honor and remember your lo. I would recommend posting a thread for ideas on the p&bl forum as you might get a lot that you havent thought of. I made a scrapbook for my lo's and it was very healing to do so. I also had a hb and am glad I was able to do it that way. If your dh is handy he might want to make a chest/box to put babies belongings in. If you have a blanket and decide to leave it with the baby make sure to keep one as well (I slept with mine for about a year).

I am really thinking of you and think it is very important for you to share your journey with us. I believe people shouldn't be sheltered from reality.

Hang in there and remember to take care of yourself as long as you need to. It is sad how soon others forget.


nicole wild.gif,  mom to 3 boys here on earth jumpers.gif 9, 7 and 4.5 and 2 girl's fly-by-nursing2.gif2.5 and 10/16/11. Always remembering my babies in heaven:  Sam (9/7/05) at 12.5 wks  angel1.gif, Morgan (2/13/06) at 6 wks angel1.gif , Emeric angel2.gif (8/9/10 at 17 wks) and Pepper angel1.gif (11/26/10) at 8wks. 

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#79 of 128 Old 09-06-2011, 01:05 PM
 
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Still thinking about you often, tutu.  It sounds like you have some concrete plans to help you process some of your grief. 

May your body find the strength and peace to birth your baby the way you want to.


dust.gifFour-eyed tattooed fairy godmother queer, mama to my lucky star (5) and little bird (2.5). Resident storyteller at www.thestoryforest.com. Enchanting audiostories for curious kids. Come play in the forest!
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#80 of 128 Old 09-06-2011, 04:29 PM
 
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Oh my goodness, I'm so sorry Mama. You're in my thoughts and prayers. And thank you, for so selflessly sharing with us, not only your story, but for sharing such valuable information as well. Big hugs, I'll be lighting a candle for your little one tonight.


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#81 of 128 Old 09-07-2011, 08:59 AM
 
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I agree with the others who have said please share as much as you're comfortable with.

 

I wish so much I had been part of a "DDC" seven years ago when our baby daughter passed away. Even though I was grieving, I was still as proud as any other mother...about my birth, my daughter's life, how she looked, and so on. But because our society has such a taboo about death, there was a limited amount of people that even asked about her, let alone take the time to look at pictures or listen to me tell our story.

 

On a somewhat related note, please be aware that because many people are so awkward about death, you may have to deal with comments/platitudes that may anger you, like "It's better off this way" or " At least you can have another baby" or the one that really made me mad - "You have an angel in heaven now!" I always wanted to scream back "I don't want a #$%@ angel, I want my BABY back!" I always tried to remember that they meant well, they just didn't know what to say.

 

Hoping you are able to birth peacefully, and gather many precious memories.

 

And if you want to share, we'd be truly honored.


SAHM to Abraham (9) Gillian (5) Adrienne (3) and baby boy coming in October! 

Always missing our Gianna, lost during fullterm labor (8/23/04)
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#82 of 128 Old 09-07-2011, 09:15 AM
 
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I am so sorry to hear of your loss. Healing thoughts to you and your family


Momma to Samuel Wyatt 8/15/09 and our new addition Jack 9/25/11!   mdcblog5.gif  winner.jpgcd.gif

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#83 of 128 Old 09-07-2011, 10:37 AM
 
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Thank you for sharing the information you found. I hope that you continue to share as much as you feel comfortable. grouphug.gif


Mama to DS (03/09) and DD (10/11) and married to the love of my life

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#84 of 128 Old 09-07-2011, 11:32 AM
 
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I will definitely light a candle for you. We light candles often for people at our dinner table. Your baby will have one tonight.


Making a March 9th sandwich with a Halloween filling.
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#85 of 128 Old 09-07-2011, 04:52 PM - Thread Starter
 
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On a somewhat related note, please be aware that because many people are so awkward about death, you may have to deal with comments/platitudes that may anger you, like "It's better off this way" or " At least you can have another baby" or the one that really made me mad - "You have an angel in heaven now!" I always wanted to scream back "I don't want a #$%@ angel, I want my BABY back!" I always tried to remember that they meant well, they just didn't know what to say.

YES! We have had some pretty shocking statements over the past few days:

"You're young still, you'll have more babies."
"You're baby is in a better place."
"There must have been something not right with the baby."
"At least you have your DS."
"Your baby is with God. He always has a plan, we have to accept this suffering."
"Your baby will be reincarnated in the future."




Momma to DS (2/08) and #2 due 10/11.
 
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#86 of 128 Old 09-07-2011, 04:58 PM
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People can be so insensitive. grouphug.gif to you, tutu, and retroactively to you, Carolyn.


professor & maman de DS1 (6) & DS2 (1)

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#87 of 128 Old 09-07-2011, 05:02 PM
 
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Oh tutu, people are so crazy and thoughtless. But I think Carolyn is right, for the most part, they just may not know what to say or how to even think about it (but, clearly, they feel the need to say something).

 

I am also thankful that you are still here sharing with us. Of course I am very saddened for you and your family, but I really am glad hear that you are able to plan for a birth that will allow you to honor your baby. Please do continue to feel welcome, and know that we are thinking of you.


dissertating mom to three

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#88 of 128 Old 09-07-2011, 07:29 PM
 
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carolyn- you are right on with that.

 

We got "maybe this is gods way of saying you shouldn't have any more children" TWICE!!!! and many other wonders.

 

We will light a candle for your baby as well. This is a hard hard journey and you are not alone. Have you checked out faces of loss faces of hope? it is an excellent resource.


nicole wild.gif,  mom to 3 boys here on earth jumpers.gif 9, 7 and 4.5 and 2 girl's fly-by-nursing2.gif2.5 and 10/16/11. Always remembering my babies in heaven:  Sam (9/7/05) at 12.5 wks  angel1.gif, Morgan (2/13/06) at 6 wks angel1.gif , Emeric angel2.gif (8/9/10 at 17 wks) and Pepper angel1.gif (11/26/10) at 8wks. 

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#89 of 128 Old 09-07-2011, 07:54 PM - Thread Starter
 
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We will light a candle for your baby as well. This is a hard hard journey and you are not alone. Have you checked out faces of loss faces of hope? it is an excellent resource.

Yes, wonderful resource!!!!

I agree, most people really have the best of intentions and just don't know how to approach someone in this circumstance. And for these few insensitive comments I have had HUNDREDS of people reaching out with nothing but pure love and kindness. I feel so blessed and loved.

Momma to DS (2/08) and #2 due 10/11.
 
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#90 of 128 Old 09-08-2011, 12:02 PM
 
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Thanks for continuing to check in.  It's nice to have some continuity.  I am praying for you and your sweet baby.  


Loving wife to a wonderful and Godly man, hug.gif  and SAHM to two beautiful boys, DS1, natural hospital birth (2/2010) and DS2, beautiful homebirth (10/2011) cd.gifnursex2.gif

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