Chat Thread: 10/2-10/8 - Mothering Forums

Forum Jump: 
Reply
 
Thread Tools
#1 of 186 Old 10-03-2011, 08:30 AM - Thread Starter
 
StephandOwen's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2004
Location: Kentucky
Posts: 8,809
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)

Have a great week!! I expect to see more babies love.gif


Steph, DH Jason (1-1-11), DS Owen (10-3-03) and DS Kai (10-13-11)

StephandOwen is offline  
#2 of 186 Old 10-03-2011, 08:44 AM
 
Teruterubozu's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2011
Location: Boston, MA
Posts: 111
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)

*sigh* I wish one would be mine. I'm 37 weeks tomorrow, feel like a whale and my pubic bone feels like it was hit with a sledgehammer. And all I get are the occasional tight BH. I'll be at this for a while.

Teruterubozu is offline  
#3 of 186 Old 10-03-2011, 09:07 AM
 
emmaegbert's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2004
Location: NYC
Posts: 2,887
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)

ok... input please on family issues. My parents (who live upstairs) are "on call" to watch the kids during my labor and birth (planned HB but of course there is always a chance of transfer). My kids are very comfortable with them, and my mom has been at my two previous births. But now it turns out they are planning an out-of-town trip (flexible dates) some time in October (my EDD is 10-24). My sister, who also lives up there, says that if they are out of town, she can take their place. But my sister is not someone I would choose for this. She loves the kids, but she is kind of a loose cannon. A drama queen. Also she has a very demanding job though she SAYS she could take "family leave" to do this. I *think* she would pull it together in a time like that, but I am honestly not 100% sure. Also, she is not really used to kids at all- doesn't have kids, never babysat, she has literally only been alone with my kids once, and it was for about 90 minutes. I mean, she is a competent adult and everything... I have another friend who agreed to be "on call" (neighbor, DS's friend's mom) as a backup. I wonder if I should tell my parents (privately of course) that I really don't feel 100% about my sister, and how to word that (I am accused already of being dismissive of her in general, that is another story all together). To be fair I obviously might be underestimating my sister. And how would I say it to her, or should I just not say anything? The other thing is, I think I can still call my "backup" friend w/ the excuse that there are 2 kids so we should have 2 adults to support them (if they are needing/wanting different things).

 

Another question... unrelated... special healing foods, herbs, etc for after the birth? Anyone planning anything along those lines? I am putting together the herbs for a peri-wash to have for the first few days PP (I had that last time and it was so nice! would mix 50/50 the herb "tea" with hot water to use in my peri bottle every time I went to the bathroom).

 

Anyway... to all of you still hanging out and feeling massively pregnant, hugs. I'm just 37 weeks today and feeling, after a burst of discomfort and lethargy, that things aren't imminent. That is fine! Almost have my whole birth kit together. Kids have new bunk beds! Got a hug-a-bub (like a moby) hand-me-down, a bunch of clothes, have offers for multiple diaper covers, things are coming together. I scrubbed the fridge and the front entryway (which was GROSS) and now have to organize the bedroom, but house feels less disgusting than it did a few days ago. I am supposed to attend a (local) school-related conference late next week.... so maybe baby can hold off until after that...


dissertating mom to three

emmaegbert is offline  
#4 of 186 Old 10-03-2011, 09:22 AM
 
Katico's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2009
Posts: 1,024
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)

 

Livacreature, I could have written your post!
 

Quote:
Originally Posted by livacreature View Post
 
I'm a (at times ridiculously) private person, I am also a person who isolates to get used to big changes.  Once I'm used to something, I'm fine, but I hate being around people while I am just fielding something.  I am not someone who likes advice, I like to just dive in and do it.  I don't want people trying to help me in the first few days.  I need to know I can do this.  I just don't get why people ask what would work best for me if they are just going to change it up at the last minute.
.......
I kind of feel like the baby is being seen as like a source of entertainment or something, and I am being pressured to bring it.  I'm sure a lot of it is normal pre-baby anxiety, coupled with in-laws visiting ALWAYS being a stressful experiences, and me needing to feel in control.  I accept that I don't have a ton of control when it comes to the delivery, but can't I at least control who comes into my house?  Plus, MIL has serious boundary issues.  And she is completely camera happy.  One of her biggest joys is taking unflattering pictures of people and fussing over how cute they are. 

 

I'm also very private and NEED to have time to find my footing in a new situation.  I hate feeling unprepared or second guessed, and I HATE unsolicited advice and hovering.  

 

Add to that the fact that my mother is seriously toxic and critical and negative (which is probably why I have such an intense need for privacy and to minimize other's chance to criticize me....)  and you're always just waiting for the next offensive thing to come out of her mouth.....not what you need when your world has just changed dramatically and you're trying to figure out the most important job you'll ever have!  Not to mention, my mother loves to "help" when she's here - she would be going through my cupboards and commenting on how I do things and where I put things, and the state of our underwear in the laundry.  Hate.

 

My MIL also has a lot of opinions and takes it personally when you don't do things the way she did - like it's a judgement on her.  Plus the camera happy thing!!! UGH!!!  MIL and SIL both snapped all sorts of unflattering pictures of me and the baby when they first visited and smeared them all over FB.  I know they were excited, but seriously...I like to have some control over the pictures the world sees of me and my family and I try to do people the courtesy of editing out any pictures that make them look terrible.  HATE THAT!!!  

My parents were just here visiting this morning (  hammer.gif  )  and I literally didn't even answer most of their questions.  I can't discuss this pregnancy with them, or our excitement, or any details of our life...I can't give it to them y'know?  They have no boundaries, they take whatever you give them and run with it - with criticism, "advice", telling everyone they know everything you tell them, making up details about your life....no way.   

 

My MIL is coming for a few days after the baby is born to help with DD.  She's the best of our options.  She at least won't go through my cupboards.  

 

My parents aren't invited to come for at least a few days and then only for a short visit. I swear, if I had gone into labour while they were here this morning I would have smiled and said nothing until they were gone!!!!!  


Also, yours bring their own cleaning supplies?!?!?!  dizzy.gif

 

 

It's so hard to set boundaries, I KNOW - after DD was born it suddenly became much easier for me, I felt like I was protecting her and my REAL family.  Now I tell all of our parents as little as possible about our life and have seriously limited contact with my parents.  AND IT FEELS GREAT.

 

Don't hesitate to set whatever rules on visitors you need to....they'll just chalk it up to you being a crazy pregnant woman rolleyes.gif  Whatever works.

 

 

AFM:    Can I just rant a little more about my mother?  She has this thing she does, that makes perfectly normal things my daughter does sound weird and bizzare..... So, DD will be doing something totally normal and unnoteworthy, like today she was chasing my father around, pretending to sneak up on him, saying BOO!  when she 'caught him'  And my mother says "what is with this 'boo' thing....?

 

She's picking rocks up off the ground, my mother: "how long has she been doing THAT THING with the rocks?"

 

She's putting her hand to her ear because she hears a sound, my mother" what's with THIS (mimics the motion)??"

 

Like a 2yo picking up rocks is so weird it needs to be discussed....

 

She does the same thing with me, just picks and picks at things I never even thought to think about - where I sit my earrings when I take them off, where I keep the salt, how I fold a towel, why I'm wearing a scarf.....pick pick pick.  This is on top of open criticism of my marriage, my housekeeping, my choice of hobbies, the way we live.... it goes on and on. Then they're so confused why we aren't close.

 

If I never saw my parents again, I would feel nothing but free.  Isn't that terrible??

 

Ahem. Anyways.

 

I slept like a normal person last night - I woke up once...ONCE!  It was amazing.  

 

I know there's more but I just wrote a novel, so later...

 


Beth knit.gif.  wife to DH and Mama to DD1 heartbeat.gif (May 1-09) and DD2 heartbeat.gif (Nov 2-11)   

Katico is offline  
#5 of 186 Old 10-03-2011, 09:41 AM
 
lifeguard's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2008
Location: Coyote Rock Farm
Posts: 6,574
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 1 Post(s)
Oh, so many parent issues. My mil drives me nutty (she's very eccentric) but I think overall we have things worked out.

emmaegbert - every time I think I have the house to a point that is acceptable it somehow backtracks again. I think a big part of it is my own frame of mind though 'cause some days the kitchen is so upsetting to me & then later that same day it seems totally ok.

katico - can I say I'm jealous of your sleep?!

afm - had my nst this morning. I do find it somewhat relaxing/comforting. I have to say it is interesting also to confirm that I am having very regular contractions. Even some of the tightenings that I have thought maybe were actually baby movement are indeed contractions - makes me feel like I'm a little bit less crazy!

We have brought all 7 kittens upstairs for a little play time right now. Ds is having a hoot (they are big enough now we don't have to worry quite so much about his rambuctiousness) trying to get them to play with balls but mostly just scaring them. I hear him say "oh, this one is too big, where's rusty (the runt)" & look over in time to see him trying to put rusty into the back of a tractor trailer toy. Sigh.

3 more "sleeps" until my induction - never thought I'd be excited for such a thing.

Surviving sleep deprivation one day at a time with dd (Oct '11) & ds (Oct '08).

lifeguard is offline  
#6 of 186 Old 10-03-2011, 11:37 AM
 
Rosemarino's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2008
Location: Massachusetts
Posts: 2,826
Mentioned: 30 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 17 Post(s)

Katico, it is very sad that your parents are horrible to you. Were they like that when you were a kid, too?

 

Lifeguard, it's great to know that the discomfort is doing something!

 

emmaegbert, why are your parents planning a trip after they told you they'd watch the kids?! Does that upset you? I'd feel abandoned!

 

I don't know how much longer I can do my job. I mean, I will do it until I have a baby, but it's very hard now, physically. And an old (flighty) client has come back to haunt me. I fired my biggest account recently, so I can't turn her down, but seriously--out of nowhere ordering meals, then I do the shop/prep and I get an email last night at 9pm changing the dates. Then I am stuck with some perishables that I would not have purchased otherwise. nono.gif Then just as I get used to her predictably unpredictable nature, she vanishes for months at a time. Her checks don't bounce, though!


Making a March 9th sandwich with a Halloween filling.
Rosemarino is online now  
#7 of 186 Old 10-03-2011, 11:44 AM
 
LaBruja's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2011
Posts: 178
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)

Emmaegbert: hmm. That is tricky. Maybe let your backup friend know the full story, but just tell your sister that there will be another person to help her out without going into details about why? Then your sister hopefully will just feel like you're trying to make things easier for her, rather than that you don't trust her...and you won't have to worry as much because you'll know your friend is there too. As for herbs, I know I will have crampbark tincture on hand for afterpains, but I didn't really have anything else planned yet...I would love your recipe for the peri-rinse though if you're willing to share!

 

Katico: ugh. Just ugh. That is totally weird how your mom reacts to your daughter's normal 2-year old behavior (I wonder what she'd say if she saw my 2yo DSS eating rocks) and as for the constant criticism of you and your family...well, I honestly just don't even know what to say. My mom is pretty awesome for the most part, but she does get in these weird moods and will occasionally start something like that, but I've gone to a super-nova level of angriness before in reaction to that kind of behavior, so now all I have to do is throw her a wild glare and she shuts up.

 

Lifeguard: I'm glad you're able to view the NSTs positively, and I'm so glad your weeks of prodromal labor are almost at an end! Lets hope all those contractions have actually been doing something for ya and you have a nice, short labor!

 

ETA: Rosemary: that would drive me bonkers...at least her checks don't bounce, but man what a pain!

 

AFM: So I went to the chiropractor on Friday...the good news is that the severe pain I'd been having in my side is NOT due a liver problem. The bad news is that I actually had a rib out of place. Ouch...no wonder I'd been in so much pain! He put it back in place but he said it'll take some time for all the muscles to heal, so I should expect to still be sore for a while. He was right...it's way better than it was, but it still hurts like the dickens...it doesn't help that I can't sleep on my back right now and have to lay on one side or the other. I'm just hoping it feels better by the time I go into labor...I would imagine that contractions and pushing with that kind of rib pain wouldn't be very comfortable.

 

My last day of work is Thursday...I am beyond excited. The weather is terrible, and I'm tired and swollen and mentally checked out already...I'm so ready to just be curled up at home in front of the fire with some hot tea and a good book!


Head over heels for DHjoy.gif bonus mama to super sweet DSS (10/9)superhero.gif and mama to DD (10/11)loveeyes.gif! nocirc.gif  sewmachine.gif  goorganic.jpg

LaBruja is offline  
#8 of 186 Old 10-03-2011, 12:12 PM
 
not_telling's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: PA
Posts: 1,045
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)

Oh my...

 

emmaegbert - That's a tricky situation...I guess one question is: could they go on their trip now?  and be back at least a week/week-and-a-half before your EDD?  Or, could they just not leave until after baby is born and you're back home?  I can't remember for sure, but I'm thinking you're doing a hospital birth, right?  So you'd be away from home for 2-3 days?  That does seem like a long time to have them with someone who's only spent 90 minutes alone with them before.  How old are your kids?  I think the older they are the better they'll be able to handle being with someone who maybe is not on their wavelength.

 

katico - I have to say that your mom's strange comments about your daughter's normal behavior actually made me laugh.  How do you react when she says thses things?  If it were me, I think I'd automatically be making a weird incredulous face, like "wtf are you talking about??" and say something like, "Umm...have you met any 2 year olds before?  That's what they do."  Or...if you wanna "stick it to her" a little bit more, start asking similar questions about the things that SHE does..."What's with all the constant criticism?" might be a good place to start.

 

labruja - ouch on the rib, but glad it's back in place.  hopefully the soreness will be gone within the week.

 

AFM - I started making a "To Do" list for when labor starts (e.g. call DH if he's not home, call my parents so they'll be ready to come over, pack last-minute items for birth ceneter bag).  I'm just worried the first stage is gonna go fast and I might forget something.  What would you put on your list?

 

Also, got pumpkins and gourds yesteday with DH and DS at a big farm/orchard we go to every year.  Tried to find a pumpkin the same size as my 37 week belly:

 

IMG_4328.JPG


Teacher until birth of DS (7-27-08)blowkiss.gifand now DD (10-17-11)femalesling.GIF:, now SAHM, wife to my wonderful hard-working DH.   cd.gifnocirc.gifselectivevax.gif

not_telling is offline  
#9 of 186 Old 10-03-2011, 12:24 PM
 
Katico's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2009
Posts: 1,024
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)

LaBruja:  I didn't know ribs could get out of place....bigeyes.gif  That sounds totally painful!!

 

Rosemary:  They used to be normal....but my mother has been chronically ill for 20 years and my father never dealt with it like a supportive, adult partner.  She couldn't work, couldn't do anything, lost her life really...they live in the middle of nowhere and she can't drive, there are no resources, very small-minded place and people totally abandoned her...even family didn't get it.  My father didn't deal with with her illness and he spent his time on anything but home/us, drank a lot of years away, had a lot of fun to take his mind off the whole thing.  And we were just along for the ride.  So, she has become a very negative, sad, anxiety ridden person, with a very narrow idea of the world,  which I totally understand....and for a long time, I just took all her crazyness because I felt so SAD and guilty about her life and because she doesn't even REALIZE she's being horrible....but now I just can't let that in anymore, y'know?  I dealt with major depression and anxiety for years and one day I just snapped out of it and realized I am not responsible for making them happy.  They could make themselves happy if they tried and I have no more sympathy for the constant complaining about how hard things are when they could change if they wanted to.  And I do not have to take their crap or burden myself with their sadness or fears or problems. It's like I was seeing the whole world through a lens of her anxiety and criticisms and one day it was just gone.  And I have no time for it anymore.  

 

Aaaaand, I'm oversharing.  A visit from them leaves me all crazy for a couple of days.

 

emmaegbert: I think the idea of "2 kids, 2 adults" is a good strategy...Even though you know your sister is competent to care for them, it's kind of a touchy time anyway - it's not ideal for your kids dealing with it all in the care of someone who doesn't GET kids or might make it worse for them, you know?   Was your parents' trip something that came up unexpectedly?

 

No word from Starling for a day or two.....

 

I have a big green&blacks chocolate bar in my purse...I am totally digging that out right now

 

 

ETA: not_telling:  I can't keep the incredulous look off my face!!!  I always say something like "....what??  They're rocks...she's 2.....she's picking them up....it's not a THING"....all in a wtf tone of voice.  It's actually almost fun to wait and see what she comes up with each time.  


Beth knit.gif.  wife to DH and Mama to DD1 heartbeat.gif (May 1-09) and DD2 heartbeat.gif (Nov 2-11)   

Katico is offline  
#10 of 186 Old 10-03-2011, 12:43 PM
 
LaBruja's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2011
Posts: 178
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)

Quote:

Originally Posted by Katico View Post

LaBruja:  I didn't know ribs could get out of place....bigeyes.gif

I know! I was like wtf...are you sure??? I guess they can go all wonky where they attach to your spine...sort of like how your vertebrae can get misaligned because they're attached with cartilage and tendons and stuff that leaves plenty of room for movement. I think. Obviously, anatomy is not my strong point:)

 

Rosemary:  And I do not have to take their crap or burden myself with their sadness or fears or problems. It's like I was seeing the whole world through a lens of her anxiety and criticisms and one day it was just gone.  And I have no time for it anymore.  

clap.gifI am really sorry about the issues with your family, but this bit was beautiful to read. Really, just wonderful...so happy that you were able to make that switch to your OWN lens!

 

No word from Starling for a day or two.....

Maybe her labor-induction cocktail worked! I hope so, if only for the sake of her poor hands...lets have some more babies!



 

 


Head over heels for DHjoy.gif bonus mama to super sweet DSS (10/9)superhero.gif and mama to DD (10/11)loveeyes.gif! nocirc.gif  sewmachine.gif  goorganic.jpg

LaBruja is offline  
#11 of 186 Old 10-03-2011, 01:08 PM
 
Amy May's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2011
Location: Boulder, CO
Posts: 482
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)

Hugs to all you ladies dealing with family issues... that is incredibly stressful, and not what we want to deal with when we're this far along in our pregnancies.  Have any of you ever tried Rescue Remedy?  My MIL brought me some, and I'm finding it is helping me deal with anxiety stuff related to family.  Speaking of, after weeks of silence, my sister called me yesterday.  It was a *pretty good* conversation- I still feel like there is a lot to address (how she makes me feel when she is so mean to me etc), but it had been causing a ton of stress, so I'm really glad she called.

 

This weekend we had a baby shower/party.  We had over 30 people plus 7 kids, and it was a blast.  Not exactly how we planned (people started leaving before we even cut the amazing carrot cake DH made), but the whole thing was so special.  Plus, my in-laws, as well as 3 other couples came up from NYC.  Two of the couples stayed with us, and it was such a great time catching up with everyone.

 

We've had such a busy summer- had trips or events just about every weekend.  This party is our last "major" thing, and it totally hit me that our next big event is the birth of this baby.  DH and I have both been pretty sentimental about rememberinig and sharing this last bit of special time between us- I just want to cuddle and be held and take walks with him.  Yesterday we met the In-laws for lunch and then came home, totally exhausted.  I was exhausted, I mean.  He was watching the Patriots game, and I napped on his lap, and even in my sleep I was melting at the tender way he would pat and carress me while watching.  I just felt like a little kitten purring.  So things like that- I'm super gushy and sentimental right now.

 

I am both scared and excited hearing all these birth stories!  I know some of you are much closer and very ready, and I can't wait to hear about more babies born!  I'm not ready yet... but my EDD isn't for 2 more weeks (guess date Oct 18th).  Two women at our party looked at my belly, made statements about how high and small it is, and stated that I'd "definitely" be pregnant through the end of the month, at least.  What does that have to do with anything?  Babies can drop anytime,and the size of my belly isn't an indication of the "readiness" of the baby!  So, I'm not ready to be done being pregnant yet, but I don't want to be pregnant for another 4 weeks!


Amy, feathering our nest with sweet husband O and baby girl, P (October 2011). 
Amy May is offline  
#12 of 186 Old 10-03-2011, 01:34 PM
~pi
 
~pi's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2005
Posts: 3,773
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)

emmaegbert, ugh, that sucks. I'm so sorry. I would think it's totally reasonable to ask both sister and friend for two kids.

 

livacreature and Katico, huge hugs. livacreature, there is no time like pregnancy to pitch a fit. People will chalk it up to hormones and you can say the things that need to be said. Katico, your mom sounds like a real piece of work.

 

lifeguard, glad the NST was good!

 

Rosemary, ugh. Can you write it into the contract that once ingredients are purchased, changes incur a charge for perishables?

 

LaBruja, OUCH. I hope it heals quickly.

 

not_telling, great photo!!

 

Amy May, sounds like you are enjoying this time. That's so great.

 

AFM, I nearly passed out yesterday getting up from the toilet. Third day post tear with inadequate pain relief? Sucks. I decided to deprioritize blood sugar control this week and removed the sensor I wear, which means that I can actually take acetaminophen again. I also listened to my midwives, who have suggested rather strongly that no matter how good I may think I feel on any given day, this week should be spent in bed as much as possible. Today has been much better, but going to the bathroom is really not my favourite thing right now.


professor & maman de DS1 (6) & DS2 (1)

~pi is offline  
#13 of 186 Old 10-03-2011, 01:41 PM
 
saoirse2007's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2007
Location: Canada
Posts: 1,288
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)

someone to watch the kiddos -

that is a big reason we are having a homebirth...our closest family is over 2000 miles away and our community is very transient so we have no friends we trust/willing to help out. if i have to transfer i will go alone...def easier since it is our third babe :)

 

we hope to move out east b4 christmas to be in a more permanent situation :)

 

 


mom to ds '07 first day of a new year, dd '09 in the caul, and  ds '11 at home Oct 24th

saoirse2007 is offline  
#14 of 186 Old 10-03-2011, 01:52 PM
 
emmaegbert's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2004
Location: NYC
Posts: 2,887
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)

Amymay, that sounds fun. and some people just love to make predictions. its silly but kind of entertaining! haha at least they aren't saying, "you're so HUGE I've never seen anyone SO GIGANTIC you look like you are about to EXPLODE have you gained 50lbs yet?" And yum on the carrot cake.

 

Katico, crazy crazy. My FIL is kind of like that with the kids. Its like he's never been around kids (I don't think he was very "present" for his own kids). Sadly I see DH can get critical in a similar vein, like "whats wrong with them" but he's amenable to just being gently reminded that they are kids.

 

Rosemary yikes on the rib! I hope it stays put now and thank goodness you don't have liver problems. Sorry about crazy clients, but at least paying clients are better than the other kind!!

 

Lifeguard I always like your siggy about your messy house, makes me feel better that I am not the only person out there who just accepts that I won't have a picture-ready home all the time (or, haha, probably ever). You are right that frame of mind is important (though the mildew growing in the front entry area, while not my fault at all... its under some leaky stairs and there is no ventilation... was particularly disgusting).

 

everyone else... gotta go make dinner so I am not going to manage personal replies, but hugs to you all. I love reading the chat threads though I never keep up.

 

THANKS everyone on seconding that my "2 kids 2 grownups" explanation will be sufficient. My sister is kind of touchy and sensitive (and a bit of a drama queen as I mentioned) so the last thing I want is her flouncing around in a huff b/c I invited someone else to do "her" job. She is getting a lot more reliable lately, so I am maybe being a little unfair. And fortunately its a homebirth. My parents will come back when I am in labor, but they'll be at least 6 hours away. I don't know why they are waiting to take their trip! I wish they would just go now but they just don't seem to want to go. Its to close up their summer house (its not winterized). Everytime I ask when they are going they say, "it depends on you!" and I'm like GO NOW THEN.

 

Meanwhile DH is driving me nuts. Can you believe that he has not asked if they have any parental leave, or if he has accumulated any sick or personal or family days (paid) yet? He is in a relatively new job (has been there a little over 4 months) and for crying out loud! Its weird to me that nobody at work has discussed these things either but seriously. Its a really busy time for them coming up and I feel like they are going to be working him like crazy, but still he needs to find out if he is entitled to anything other than FMLA leave (and he will only take a day or two of that b/c we depend on his wages). (he is an artist/designer in the visual display department for the Rockefeller Center flagship store for his company, and holiday tourism/shopping to NYC is HUGE from Thanksgiving through New Years, so they go all out with the in-store and holiday windows, Rock center is CRAZY starting with thanksgiving, just wall-to-wall people 24-7 for weeks and weeks).


dissertating mom to three

emmaegbert is offline  
#15 of 186 Old 10-03-2011, 02:19 PM
 
CeceStar's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2010
Posts: 100
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)

Hello all!  I haven't posted in forever, but I have been popping in from time to time and reading to catch up.  It's exciting all the October (September) babies that are here!

 

I've been extremely busy, as I'm finishing up work on my doctorate, and of course caring for my older three children.  I've definitely reached the point of being ready to meet my baby, although I'm nervous about adding to my life right now!

 

Just made my list of what dh needs to do when labor starts, for our home birth, and another list of my must haves if we end up transferring.  I can't believe it's our month!

CeceStar is offline  
#16 of 186 Old 10-03-2011, 03:06 PM
 
lifeguard's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2008
Location: Coyote Rock Farm
Posts: 6,574
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 1 Post(s)
katico - good for you for getting to such a good place mentally with your parents. Overcoming depression is so hard & once you do it is so important to protect yourself from it again.

labruja - seriously, the rib thing sounds awful!!!

amy may - I canNOT stand it when people think it is fun to guess you'll go until the bitter end. Why? What is the sick fascination with wanting women to stay uncomfortable for so long?

pi - did they not give you anything for the pain? I remember how painful my tear was & otc would not have touched it. I hope it heals really, really fast.

emmaegbert - dh only looked into parental leave TODAY & I'm being induced Thursday. Yeah, he was supposed to give 2 weeks written notice. Sigh. Now we're trying to figure out what dates he should take instead (he can take it anytime within the year).


Surviving sleep deprivation one day at a time with dd (Oct '11) & ds (Oct '08).

lifeguard is offline  
#17 of 186 Old 10-03-2011, 03:36 PM
 
not_telling's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: PA
Posts: 1,045
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)

 

Quote:
Originally Posted by ~pi View Post

 

AFM, I nearly passed out yesterday getting up from the toilet. Third day post tear with inadequate pain relief? Sucks. I decided to deprioritize blood sugar control this week and removed the sensor I wear, which means that I can actually take acetaminophen again. I also listened to my midwives, who have suggested rather strongly that no matter how good I may think I feel on any given day, this week should be spent in bed as much as possible. Today has been much better, but going to the bathroom is really not my favourite thing right now.


I had some tears with DS...can't say what "degree" they were or anything...between that and my pelvic misalignment issue, my midwives wrote me a Rx for Percocet.  First they prescribed the most mild dosage, but we were unable to find a pharmacy that had it, so they consulted with the pharmacist at the CVS we go to and they agreed on the lowest dosage the pharmacy had (maybe one step stronger than the original dosage) and felt okay about me taking it while nursing.  I think they also had me taking some OTC stuff, too.   I felt a little weird about it, though, so I think I stopped using the perocet after 3 days or so.  Are you doing any kind of herbal sitz bath or peri wash?  I was thinking of picking up some of that Earth Mama Angel Baby herbal blend to either use for a soak or the way emmaegbert is doing it in the peri bottle.

 

Also, yes -- you absolutely have to take it easy this week!  (and next)  I guess that was one of the few "pros" about me being unable to walk for 2 weeks after DS was born -- I was forced to take it easy.

 


Teacher until birth of DS (7-27-08)blowkiss.gifand now DD (10-17-11)femalesling.GIF:, now SAHM, wife to my wonderful hard-working DH.   cd.gifnocirc.gifselectivevax.gif

not_telling is offline  
#18 of 186 Old 10-03-2011, 06:19 PM
 
theboysmama's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2005
Posts: 3,380
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)

I will come back and do personals but wanted to update on me real quick and post some pics. Yesterday we got our family belly photos done and they turned out pretty good. I don't want to post those bcs I don't like having my kids photos on a public forum. But that is one more thing I can check off the list. I also finished beading my necklace from the birth bead exchange just in time for the photos.

Today we had an ultrasound (because of dh's freak out last week). I think he is feeling a little better. Boo is doing great. Everything seems perfect as far as they can tell. She is still a girl, the cord and placenta are way out of the way, she is head down and ingaged, fluid looks good, heart and brain and cord all look good. They say she is 7lbs 2oz, my mw sais that she feels more like 6 and I agree with that.

Then I had a mw appt this afternoon. She was pleased with the results. She brought her niece who is going to serve as my female support person (for free) and I really like her. My dh and my brother will be there so I find a female support (that is not my mw) is really great to have. They remember things like taking photos, reminding me to put on my necklace, brade my hair, where are the kids?, etc.

I am actually really excited for the first time this pg. I really am feeling hopeful about this little one.

I am going to cosco tomorrow to stock up and then later this week need to get the co-sleeper out of storage and set it up. Besides that we are good to go.

37 wks 3 days today!!!

I don't like these photos near as much as the 20 wk ones bcs she is so squished and kind of creepy looking but I love her chubby cheeks!

 

37 WEEKS_0004 (2).TIF         37 WEEKS_0002 (2).TIF

 


nicole wild.gif,  mom to 3 boys here on earth jumpers.gif 9, 7 and 4.5 and 2 girl's fly-by-nursing2.gif2.5 and 10/16/11. Always remembering my babies in heaven:  Sam (9/7/05) at 12.5 wks  angel1.gif, Morgan (2/13/06) at 6 wks angel1.gif , Emeric angel2.gif (8/9/10 at 17 wks) and Pepper angel1.gif (11/26/10) at 8wks. 

theboysmama is offline  
#19 of 186 Old 10-03-2011, 07:05 PM
 
lifeguard's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2008
Location: Coyote Rock Farm
Posts: 6,574
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 1 Post(s)
theboysmama - that is fabulous! I'm glad you are getting so excited!

9 hours of contractions so far today. Who can say exhausted?

Surviving sleep deprivation one day at a time with dd (Oct '11) & ds (Oct '08).

lifeguard is offline  
#20 of 186 Old 10-03-2011, 08:28 PM
 
theboysmama's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2005
Posts: 3,380
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)

lifeguard- Thanks!

Glad you have an end in sight for this prodromal labor. Hope your dh will get to take some time off. Men really just don't plan well.

 

emmaegbert- Hope your dh can figure something out. Does he qualify for fmla. With ds 2 my dh didn't qualify bcs he had been there less than (6months, a yr? not sure which). Sorry about your family issues. That would really frustrate me. My dad will be here right after teh birth and my brother at the birth BUT they are going out of town together 2 wks before my edd. I freaked out about it but my dad said "you never go early so we figured it was safe, plus I know you and know you won't go into labor until we are back" He is so right so I had to let it go. Hopefully it works out for your parents to be there. That sounds like the best case scenario.

 

Pi- don't get up unless you have to pee. Enjoy the time with your lo. Definately use a peri bottle, I find just warm water is sufficient.

 

AmyMay- sounds like you and dh are making the most of your final days of just the 2 of you. I really wish dh and I had done that.

 

not_telling- great pic.

 

Rosemary- That totally sucks!!! I run my own business as well and have found that I had to make policies for those very few annoying people. I make it a blanket statement but don't enforce it unless necessary. Since this client disappeared for a while maybe you could respond to her late e-mail with, While you were away we came up with a new policy that states we need 24 hrs notice on cancellations or changes, if those changes incurr a charge (due to parishables, etc) then the client will be charged that ammount. You can tell her you will inforce it now or tell her it is in effect and will inforce it in the future. Good luck.

 

La Brua- OUCH!!! I am glad the chiropractor helped and hope that it heals quickly.

 

Katico- So sorry you are dealing with family issues. It is so frustrating to me  that pg women have to deal with this kind of crap, why do people not have boundaries?????

You might be surprised if you sit down andhave a heart to heart with your mom (at some point) about how she makes you feel, how you are worried about how sad she is, etc. that she might really turn around. I did that with my MIL and my husband is blown away by how she has changed over the last 10 yrs. It has been very gradual but a positive change. She still drives me nuts but it is much much more manageable and sooooooo worth it.

 

 


nicole wild.gif,  mom to 3 boys here on earth jumpers.gif 9, 7 and 4.5 and 2 girl's fly-by-nursing2.gif2.5 and 10/16/11. Always remembering my babies in heaven:  Sam (9/7/05) at 12.5 wks  angel1.gif, Morgan (2/13/06) at 6 wks angel1.gif , Emeric angel2.gif (8/9/10 at 17 wks) and Pepper angel1.gif (11/26/10) at 8wks. 

theboysmama is offline  
#21 of 186 Old 10-03-2011, 08:55 PM
 
starling&diesel's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2007
Location: West Coast, Canada
Posts: 3,850
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 14 Post(s)

I'm here, I'm here!  Not a lot of time to post with personals, but here are some pics and a few details of my imperfect perfect birth.

We aimed for a homebirth and were doing well with it until everything grinded to a halt at about 130am on October 2nd, much to everyone's surprise.
Baby decided he was not going to be born vaginally at all, and had turned himself to block the birth canal.  After a very painful and unpleasant trip to Women's Hospital via ambulance (not my proudest moment, hello colleagues), we laboured some more in hopes that he would turn, but he didn't.  Many tears later, there I was in the operating room getting the caesarian I'd been so afraid of.
He looks just like his big sister did in those first few hours and days ... it will interesting to see if they resemble each other as they get older.
I left the hospital today, earlier than I should've, but I wanted to get home to E and am glad that I did. 

Our little family is together for the first time tonight! 

DSC_0166.JPG

DSC_0173.JPG

 

 

 

 


dust.gifFour-eyed tattooed fairy godmother queer, mama to my lucky star (5) and little bird (2.5). Resident storyteller at www.thestoryforest.com. Enchanting audiostories for curious kids. Come play in the forest!
starling&diesel is offline  
#22 of 186 Old 10-03-2011, 09:00 PM
 
tank's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: NC
Posts: 490
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)

aww congrats!  He is so cute and I love the one of the 2 of them!


Awesome vegan mom to wolverine babyf.gif11/11 and sabertooth 11/13 and partner to a drum.gifwe also have dog2.gif

 

tank is offline  
#23 of 186 Old 10-03-2011, 09:35 PM
 
Trinket90's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2011
Location: Brunswick, Maryland
Posts: 243
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)

AWWWW!!!

 

I think my heart skipped a beat at those pictures. What an angel.

 

I'm glad you both came through it safely, even if it wasn't exactly how you planned. Enjoy your family time!


Mom to Eli babyboy.gif 10/18/11 and loving wife to Derrin. heartbeat.gif 

Proud to be "that" girl--the crazy bedsharing, sling-wearing, breastfeeding mama everyone

thinks is crazy!

 

Trinket90 is offline  
#24 of 186 Old 10-03-2011, 09:39 PM
 
theboysmama's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2005
Posts: 3,380
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Starling- congratulations!! He is adorable! I hope your recovery goes well.

nicole wild.gif,  mom to 3 boys here on earth jumpers.gif 9, 7 and 4.5 and 2 girl's fly-by-nursing2.gif2.5 and 10/16/11. Always remembering my babies in heaven:  Sam (9/7/05) at 12.5 wks  angel1.gif, Morgan (2/13/06) at 6 wks angel1.gif , Emeric angel2.gif (8/9/10 at 17 wks) and Pepper angel1.gif (11/26/10) at 8wks. 

theboysmama is offline  
#25 of 186 Old 10-03-2011, 09:50 PM
 
yellowdart's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2010
Location: Iowa
Posts: 585
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)

Congrats on your sweet baby, starling!  Sorry the birth hit the fan.    


heartbeat.gif  Baby girl arrived 10/11/11 heartbeat.gif

yellowdart is offline  
#26 of 186 Old 10-03-2011, 10:17 PM
 
capretta's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2010
Posts: 517
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Congratulations starling!
capretta is offline  
#27 of 186 Old 10-04-2011, 04:17 AM
 
Teruterubozu's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2011
Location: Boston, MA
Posts: 111
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)

Oh congratulations, Starling! What a beautiful pair of children you have!

Teruterubozu is offline  
#28 of 186 Old 10-04-2011, 06:12 AM - Thread Starter
 
StephandOwen's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2004
Location: Kentucky
Posts: 8,809
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)

How precious, Starling! Congrats!!!


Steph, DH Jason (1-1-11), DS Owen (10-3-03) and DS Kai (10-13-11)

StephandOwen is offline  
#29 of 186 Old 10-04-2011, 06:18 AM
 
nicolian's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2010
Location: NH
Posts: 1,019
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)

Congrats, Starling!


Nicole treehugger.gif  Busy with my two boys.jog.gifdiaper.gif  The 'big boy' too. peace.gifOh, and a sweet baby girl, born at home in October. love.gif

nicolian is offline  
#30 of 186 Old 10-04-2011, 06:21 AM
 
not_telling's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: PA
Posts: 1,045
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)

Yay Starling!!  Beautiful, precious photos....so happy for you and your family!


Teacher until birth of DS (7-27-08)blowkiss.gifand now DD (10-17-11)femalesling.GIF:, now SAHM, wife to my wonderful hard-working DH.   cd.gifnocirc.gifselectivevax.gif

not_telling is offline  
Reply

Quick Reply
Message:
Drag and Drop File Upload
Drag files here to attach!
Upload Progress: 0
Options

Register Now

In order to be able to post messages on the Mothering Forums forums, you must first register.
Please enter your desired user name, your email address and other required details in the form below.
User Name:
If you do not want to register, fill this field only and the name will be used as user name for your post.
Password
Please enter a password for your user account. Note that passwords are case-sensitive.
Password:
Confirm Password:
Email Address
Please enter a valid email address for yourself.
Email Address:

Log-in

Human Verification

In order to verify that you are a human and not a spam bot, please enter the answer into the following box below based on the instructions contained in the graphic.



User Tag List

Thread Tools
Show Printable Version Show Printable Version
Email this Page Email this Page


Forum Jump: 

Posting Rules  
You may post new threads
You may post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are Off